Here it is, everyone! Not much time to talk, but it IS here! Oh, and BTW...
SHIPPUUDEN SPOILER WARNING!!!! If you watch the anime instead of reading the manga, I don't advise reading the story unless you don't care for spoilers. Thank you.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Everyone within the five shinobi countries seemed to be gathering together at a single location: Konoha. Lights shined towards the heavens, to announce where the festivities were being held. Chatter floated among the groups of ninja around and inside a building, some dressed in formal wear and some in their regular attire. Among the ninja all dressed up was a tall, perverted hermit.
"Jiraiya is HERE!" Jiraiya announced, striking a pose as he unnecessarily hollered into the microphone. "And looking as good as ever! Welcome, everyone, to the Shinobi's Choice Awards!"
The crowd stared at Jiraiya for an elapsed time of two-point-four seconds and continued with their activities. However, Jiraiya wasn't about to let the crowd's lack of applause faze his excitement.
"That's right! This year's annual Shinobi's Choice Awards is here and gonna be great! We've got some new awards to give out to those former genin from two and a half year's back like the 'Most Accomplished Award'! Not to mention we're awaiting a few special guests!"
"Ero-Sennin!"
"Eh?" Jiraiya turned to face an enraged-looking Uzumaki Naruto.
"Who the hell made you the host for Shinobi's Choice Awards?!" Naruto demanded.
"You know how much people adore me, Naruto!" Jiraiya said, flashing a smile.
"But this makes no sense!" Naruto exclaimed, "Aren't you…supposed to be…" Naruto coughed.
"This is the Shinobi's Choice Awards, Naruto," Jiraiya explained wisely. "There's no line between life and death during this time!"
"But if you're here, then that means your not…dead…even though you are and…and…but…" Naruto scratched his head in confusion. "My brain hurts."
"Its okay, Naruto!" Sakura said, walking over to her teammate. "Relax! It's the Shinobi's Choice Awards!"
"Ah, Sakura! Don't you look lovely?" Jiraiya remarked.
"Hands off, bub!" Naruto hissed, snapping back to the here and now.
Sakura rolled her eyes. "Where's Kakashi-sensei? Wasn't he supposed to be a host too?"
"On the contrary, I don't mind hosting alone!" Jiraiya said, "More limelight for the master!"
"It's just like Kakashi to miss the biggest honor in his life!"
"Oh great…Gai…" Jiraiya muttered.
Sure enough, Gai along with his team were walking towards the three.
"Sakura-san, you look brilliant!" Lee commented, giving her the nice guy pose.
"Thanks, Lee-san! You look…um…vibrant," Sakura said politely.
Of course, Lee and Gai had to have matching green tuxedos with orange polka-dot ties. Sakura wasn't about to say it was the most hideous thing she had ever seen…at least, in front of Lee.
"My, my, Tenten!" Jiraiya said, "You're a sight for sore eyes!"
"Uh…thanks…" Tenten said, stepping away from Jiraiya.
Jiraiya frowned but burst into a smile again. "And strapping, young, Neji! I hear you're a favorite for Genius of the Year this year, huh, huh?"
"Oh really? I hadn't noticed."
"That's because I'm going to win Genius of the Year!" Lee cut in, grabbing Jiraiya's microphone. "I, one who is the genius of hard work!"
"Good for you, Lee!" Gai cried. "Your enthusiasm brings tears to my eyes!"
"Gai-sensei!"
"Lee!"
"Gai-sensei!"
"Lee!"
"Do they have to do this every year?" Sakura whispered to Tenten.
"It's a given," Tenten replied.
"Whatever you say, Lee," Neji said, "(cough)chuunin(cough)."
Lee gasped. "Was that a challenge, Neji?"
"What?" Neji said innocently.
"I'm aware that you are a jounin and I am a chunnin, but that does not make you better than me!"
"Don't get so riled up. They're just names. It was a joke."
"Neji making jokes?" Naruto laughed.
"You think I'm incapable of being funny, Uzumaki?" Neji questioned.
"Whoa, whoa, boys! Leave it for another day! No fighting tonight!" Jiraiya said quickly.
"Mark my words, I will obtain a variety of awards tonight," Neji declared before he started walking towards the doors to the ceremony room.
"Neji's…a little too excited tonight," Tenten said with a little laugh. She followed after the Hyuuga.
"Neji will have to take that award from my cold, manly hands!" Lee announced.
"'Atta boy, Lee!"
"Sir!"
The pair's grins gleamed before they followed the other two into the building.
"They're both delusional," Naruto said. "Everyone knows I'm gonna win the Genius of the Year."
Jiraiya and Sakura coughed.
"WHAT?"
"Well—oh, look who's here! Team 8!"
"Where?" Naruto turned around to come face-to-face with a blushing Hinata. "Nyah!"
"E-Eh! S-Sorry, Naruto-kun!" Hinata shouted, stepping back at least ten paces.
"Hey, Hinata! Where ya goin'?" Kiba questioned. "Come back here!"
"O-Okay…"
"Hey, if you're talking about awards, lemme just say that Akamaru and I have the Best Partners Award in the bag! Right, Akamaru?" Kiba said. He patted his overgrown dog who barked in agreement.
"How many partners are out there, anyway?" Naruto murmured, earning a jab in the side from Sakura.
"Yeah, yeah, that's nice, kid," Jiraiya said. "Hey, Kurenai—"
"Let's go, team!" called Kurenai, who was already halfway towards the doors.
"Aw…it was worth a try."
"You're pathetic," Naruto said.
"Oh, what does a brat like you know? What are you still doing here anyway?"
"We're waiting for someone," Sakura answered.
"And who's that?"
Jiraiya's question was answered when a familiar face appeared. "Good afternoon."
"There you are, Sai! Taichou! Way to keep us waiting," Naruto said.
"I had to get Sai…he was taking the longest time in his house," Yamato explained.
"Sorry," Sai said. "I was practicing."
"Practicing what?" Sakura asked.
"Lines for tonight, of course. I've never been to the Shinobi's Choice Awards before. Well, not out here in public, anyway." He looked up at Jiraiya and said, "You're quite the large man."
"Are you saying I'm fat, kid?" Jiraiya demanded.
"Uh—I think he means 'tall', Jiraiya-sama!" Sakura said, pushing Sai towards the ceremony building. "Heheh, let's go guys!"
Just then, a puff of smoke erupted and Kakashi materialized into view.
"And where have you been, Kakashi?" Jiraiya questioned.
"Avoiding my team," Kakashi shrugged as if it was something he did all the time. WHICH HE PROBABLY DID. "I was also rereading that marvelous Icha Icha Tactics."
"Oh. Well, that's okay then," Jiraiya said proudly. "The second time's always the best. What do you think of the part when Junko—"
"Ahem."
"Asuma and Team 10! Long time no see!" Kakashi said, his one visible eye closing cheerfully.
"Yes…it has," Asuma said.
"I would just like to say," Ino said solidly, "That if I don't win 'Best Dressed' this year, then I will be devastated! Oh, and I also believe Asuma-sensei should win the 'Most Honorable Death Award'."
"I see how much you appreciate me, Ino," Asuma sighed.
"That's right, sensei!"
"Why don't we just go in already?" Shikamaru groaned. "This is troublesome, standing out here with all the flashing lights."
"Come now, Shikamaru," Asuma said. "Don't you wanna give a word to the audience?"
"Yeah, actually," Shikamaru said, taking Kakashi's microphone. "Whoever the bastard who's been letting the deer out as a prank is, knock it off. We will find you." Then he sauntered off.
"That…was kind of anomalous," Kakashi remarked.
"Ino, my dear girl—"
"Don't even try, Jiraiya," Asuma interrupted.
Team 10 headed for the doors.
"I think I might win 'Best Dressed' this year, Ino," Chouji said.
"Sure, Chouji. Sure."
"Who's that making their way down the carpet?" Jiraiya said, "None other than the Sand Siblings! Temari, how beautiful you look!"
"Who the hell are you?" Temari said with disgust.
Jiraiya face-faulted.
"Gaara, you've come a long way since last Shinobi's Choice Awards, haven't you?"
"I believe so."
"Of course he has!" Kankuro said, "He's the freaking Kazekage!"
Gaara stared at Kankuro oddly for a full minute then said, "Yes. I am."
"Think you'll bring home a lot of awards tonight?" Kakashi questioned.
Gaara shrugged. "It's possible."
"Hey, don't forget his brother," Kankuro said, "I've come pretty far too, you know. I might just get as many awards as Gaara if not more!"
Kankuro glared as he waited for Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Temari to stop laughing.
"Let's just go inside," he growled, stomping down the carpet.
"Hehehehmore than Gaara!" Temari chuckled
"Shut up, Temari!".
"Anyway, this year, Akatsuki are showing up as well, aren't they?" Jiraiya said.
"Hm? Did you say something?" Kakashi asked.
"Hey, I thought you finished reading that!" Jiraiya exclaimed.
"It's just so good. I have to read it again."
"It is, isn't it? I worked a long time on the scene where—STOP GETTING ME OFF TOPIC!" Jiraiya ordered.
Kakashi shrugged.
"Like I said, the Akatsuki are coming again this year as well as a certain snake…"
"The years have not been kind, eh Jiraiya?"
"Speak of the devil," Jiraiya frowned, "How've you been, you sneaky bastard?"
"Fine, fine," Orochimaru said. "What's it like in the afterlife?"
"You should know."
"Touché."
"Well look who's here," Kakashi commented, "My old student."
"You mean my old student," Orochimaru hissed.
"Are we on TV?" Karin asked excitedly fixing her hair.
"Forget this," Sasuke said as he continued to walk.
"Don't be so quick, Sasuke," Kakashi said. "I have a question for you. Ever regret leaving Konoha?"
"I thought this was an award ceremony, not an interview," Sasuke growled, pushing past his old sensei.
"Even today he's acting all high and mighty," Suigetsu spat.
"Don't you dare insult Sasuke!" Karin shouted, slapping him upside the head.
"Calm down, Karin," Juugo said.
The three followed after the Uchiha, leaving the other group behind.
"I suppose you never taught him manners in two and a half years," Kakashi remarked.
"If you think that's not polite, how's trying to kill his own master?" Orochimaru said bitterly. "That back-stabbing little git! I mean, now I have to use Kabuto. That really doesn't help my goals at all. And I—"
"We aren't an advice column, move along!" Jiraiya ordered. "Tsunade's inside and I hear she wants to give you a little something after all these years."
Orochimaru harrumphed and walked out of sight.
"What happened to the 'no battling' rule for SCA?" Kakashi asked.
"She just wants to give him a friendly jab," Jiraiya said shiftily.
"I see." It wasn't like he cared anyway.
"There are still so many people to interview, eh Kakashi?"
"Huh? Yeah."
"Unfortunately, it's about time for the festivities to start, so we're gonna head on in! This has been the great Jiraiya-sama and Kakashi from the Shinobi's Choice Awards!" Jiraiya struck a pose.
"You're starting to remind me of someone…" Kakashi murmured.
If you voted in the poll, thank you! Kakashi actually tied with Nami with 4 votes, but since Kakashi is canon, of course I had to put him in. Jiraiya won by 9 votes, hands down! And after warming you up with that poll, here are the awards/honorable mentions for next chappie...
Best Dressed Award
Best Hair Award
Worst Dressed Honorable Mention
Worst Hair Honorable Mention
Nyahaha...I don't know how being worst is honorable, but I AM a bit curious, and it would set up for some interesting dialogue that you all know I love to write...Anyway, as you can see, I'm going to bring back some of the old awards since its Shippuuden and pretty something brand new to vote on. And of course, there will be some new awards as well. Vote fairly, please!
I HOPE YOU HAVE/HAD A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
-HM