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To my ultimate dismay, I do not own the rights to FMA (full metal alchemist)

Library of mini FMA shorts!

Roy's secret phobia

"The weather seems to be getting worse."

Riza Hawkeye said, looking out the window at the falling rain as she filed some paperwork in the cabinet behind Roy Mustang's desk. Said colonel was signing documents lazily.

"What was that, Hawkeye?"

"The weather. It's getting worse. We may be in for a thunder storm."

She heard a small noise behind her and she turned around. Roy was picking up a pen that was on the floor.

"Clumsy me."

Hawkeye turned back to the window and her filing. Just outside, thunder crashed and once again, she turned around and saw Roy pen-less. Only, this time, the pen had "dropped" halfway across the room. As he walked to get it again, Hawkeye looked to the document he had been signing when his pen flew and found that not only had he not signed his full name, but the "T" in his name was running off the paper and onto the desk. Roy returned, having recovered his pen and took his seat. He set aside the ruined document and started signing another one, without saying even one word.

"Are you alright, sir?"
"Fine, Hawkeye. Why do you ask?"

"You're acting strange. Very strange- even for your normal self."

A small light from the storm outside shone in the window and Hawkeye just barely caught the sight of Roy flinching, relaxing only once all was quiet again. He didn't turn around and set aside yet another ruined document.

"Sir, it's only a little storm, no need to be alarmed. I doubt the power will go out."

"I'm not afraid."

"Yeah? Well, you're acting like a scaredycat."

"I don't like cats, you know that.

He just kept on signing as if nothing was wrong and Hawkeye stared at him, watching him very carefully, and at the slightest flash or noise, he'd jump. Then, a large flash and a loud crackle from outside triggered in him. After it had calmed down again, papers were flying around everywhere and Roy was standing at his desk.

"I have to go."

"Go? Go where?"

"Home."

Another flash and Roy dashed around his desk in a hurry.

"I have to go, now!"

He moved around the scattered papers and went to grab his coat. He was halfway to the door when Riza stepped in front of him, blocking his way.

"Please get out of my way."

"There is no way I'm letting you leave now! Every time there is the tiniest of storms outside, you bail and leave me to finish all of your work! It's not going to happen again, colonel! This time, you're staying here!"

Roy looked tense, you could really tell he was desperate. A few beads of sweat rolled over his temple as he was locked in a staring contest with his subordinate. Another flash. Roy's head snapped to the window until it calmed down, and then his eyes drifted slowly to his desk. He quirked an eyebrow and a glint shone in the dark color. He quickly ran to his desk, grabbed his coffee mug and shoved it into Riza's hands.

"Okay, but I'll need more coffee. Black, two sugars. Go, go, go! Need coffee, go!"

And he shoved her out of the office and slammed the door. Just like that. She stood there, staring at the door and holding the half-full cup of coffee in her hands. (On the cup, it had a picture of Roy with a peace sign saying 'I'm the boss!') She quirked an eyebrow before proceeding back into the room without knocking; and completely ignoring the order she was given to retrieve coffee. Roy was nowhere in sight. Papers were still scattered all over the floor, and Roy's coat was thrown carelessly onto the floor. She knew something was up, not only because of hie recent actions, and the fact that his office was a mess, but the fact… that Roy only liked CREAM in his coffee, not sugar. So, Hawkeye circled the room, going towards the desk with the knocked over chair.

"Sir…? Are you in here?"

No answer, but, with the appearance of more lightning, she was given a good hint as to where he was, from the quiet, low whimpers coming from the desk. She slowly moved in front of it and took out her gun. She waited a moment, and then fired a shot into the air. The table jumped a little bit and she heard a quiet cuss. She moved around the table and wouldn't you know it, there was Roy, curled up under the desk nursing a sore head from hitting the top of the desk.

"Ow…!"

"THERE you are, sir! What do you think you're doing down there, anyway?"

"Um…"

Roy quietly held up his pen, not moving from under the desk.

"I… dropped it again… …I got it now!"

Not good enough. Hawkeye was starting to get frustrated and grabbed his arms, trying to pull him upward and out from his hiding spot.

"Get out from under there, sir! It's just a storm, don't be disgraceful!"

"No, I don't wanna, Riza!"

More lightning outside, louder and the flash brighter than the others before it, and when it was gone, Hawkeye found that Roy was sitting on his knees, no longer under the desk, but his arms were wrapped tightly around her waist. She cleared her throat and he looked up at her.

"Business… or personal?"

He asked, quietly. Hawkeye got out her gun again and pointed it at his head.

"SIR… don't you have work to do!"

"…Business it is… I'll get right on it."

Hawkeye kept Roy at the office all night with her gun to his head to make sure he worked. Though he feared storms, I think he started to fear the nagotiative powers of his female subordinate more. Poor Roy sipped at his cold coffee. The Roy on the mug also frowned.

Oh yes, Roy dislikes cats… especially scaredycats. …. But… he still hated lightning storms more.