A/n. I have made some small changes and adjustments to the layout of this story, thanks MLWE!

Captain Sparklesalot.

All was quiet in the Cullen household, Carlisle and Esmee were out hunting, Alice and Rose were buying clothes on line, Edward and Jasper were playing chess, and Emmett, well Emmett was Bored!

EMMETTS POV

I'm so, so bored, I wonder if Rose is in the mood for some freaky time, mmmm freaky time,

"Emmett, could you stop that, you are putting me off my game," said Edward.

"Uh sorry little bro, can't help it." I said and I sauntered over to Rose, "Hey my little Rose bush, fancy coming up stairs?"

"Not now Emmett, I'm busy, go wait up stairs." Rose said and winked at me. So I bounded up the stairs to wait.

I waited.....And waited.....And waited. So, so, bored, hhmm what could I do? I knew if I called Rose again it would put her in a bad mood, and then I had an idea!

Rooting around in rose's closet I found what I was looking for, black leggings, stripping of my pants, I quickly replaced them with Roses leggings, then I snuck off to Carlisle room, I needed Y fronts for this little plan and I was more of a boxer shorts man.

Slipping the Y fronts on over the leggings, I checked out the view in the mirror, not bad, not bad, my butt looks gooood, but it needs something else, I ran to Alice's closet, hoping she was too busy shopping to 'see' what I was up to.

I found it in the back, a bright Red cloak she wore at Christmas; I stripped off my shirt and hung the cloak round my shoulders.

Finally I took Rose's bright red lip stick and looking in the mirror drew a giant S on my stomach. Perfect!

I leapt the stairs in a single bound, landing at the bottom with my fists on my hips, sticking out my chest, Hero style.

"I am Captain Sparklesalot!" I said, in my deepest voice and grinned. Rose just looked at me and said,

"Your S is backwards," then turned back to the computer.

The rest just kept staring.

"Come on guys, come and play, it will be fun, please, we can go save some humans in Forks."

They all turned back to what they were doing.

Spoil Sports!

"Eddy please come and play, please, I need you to listen out for the damsels in distress." I said,

"Not a chance Emmett, we are not super hero's we are vampires." He said.

Ok Edward I started thinking I didn't want to do this, but you leave me little choice, I started to picture Rose, standing next to a pole.

"It's not going to work Emmett." Edward said.

Hhhmm well we will see about that, and I pictured rose in a cow boy hat a pink rhinestone bra and pink leather arseless chaps. Edward was grimacing.

"It's still not going to work." Edward said again. So I pictured rose dancing on the pole. It still wasn't working, so I tried one last trick.

If you don't come and play I will think of something you will never forget. He still didn't respond, so I did it.

I changed Rose over for myself, and in my mind I started to grind the pole, wearing the full outfit I had pictured earlier on Rose.

Edward was looking at me in horror.

Okay Eddy boy one last chance, come and play with me or I will bend over, and remember these chaps are arseless, do you really want the image of my big hairy sparkly butt, in pink leather arseless chaps imprinted in your mind for the rest of eternity? I thought.

"Okay, okay, stop it, please god I'm begging you, stop it!" Edward screamed at me, jumping up and knocking the chess board flying.

"Excellent, come on Eddy, let's go get you an outfit," I cried running up the stairs, "Oh and you can be called the boy Mental, my side kick." Fun times!!!

A/N –Okay, I hope you enjoyed it and haven't been to mentally scared by the image of Emmett in pink leather arseless chaps. I do have another chapter to this story but if you want me to put it up then you are going to have to review, then Captain Sparklesalot and the boy mental can come and rescue the chapter and save the day.