Author's Note: Another request I got from (more like forced out of) one of my friends. 'Kabuto, cooking chicken.' Like always, sorry for any spelling errors.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of the characters in Naruto.

Kabuto in the Kitchen

Kabuto looked at his victim, speaking to it and telling it how pitiful it was to him before he sliced it open and watched its organs spill out. Now, that would be all fine and actually cool if it was a person he was talking to. But Kabuto 'victim' was a chicken, an already dead chicken to be precise.

Even though Kabuto was a skilled a ninja and medic, he wasn't the greatest cook in the world. Cooking had been left to Kidoumaru since he had four arms and also was actually extremely good at cooking. Sadly though, every member of the Sound Five had been killed when they went to get Sasuke. And to Kabuto disappointment Sasuke hadn't been killed as well.

It wasn't as if the medic had anything against the Uchiha prodigy, since he barely knew the kid, but Kabuto didn't particularity like the Konoha genin. Actually, it wasn't a matter of not liking Sasuke, it was a matter of being totally, undeniably jealous of the kid. And it wasn't because of his fancy jutsu or Bloodline, it was because Orochimaru like him more.

Now Kabuto wasn't one to normally be jealous over something as silly as that. But he had worked so hard to become Orochimaru's favorite and now that annoying little emo kid just walked right into his spot. He had taken a lot in his life, but this was the last straw! He would show Sasuke why no one messed with Kabuto Yakushi. He would give that kid a piece of his mind!

"Why are you massacring the chicken? It's already dead." Sasuke asked boorishly, interrupting Kabuto's thoughts. Sasuke wasn't the most polite little bugger in the world as Kabuto had been quick to find out. He was needy, complained a lot, and believed he was greater than everyone.

"What, you've never taken your anger out on a dead animal before Sasuke?" Kabuto asked, wanting to spit out words of venom at his 'rival'. Though he couldn't bring himself the yell at Sasuke, since he could make the poor kid cry and Orochimaru wouldn't want to know his new vessel was a totally pansy.

Sasuke replied with a simply, annoying 'hn' as he walked over towards the fridge and started hunting for the tomatoes that he loved so much. He was surprised to find that there were none of the delicious red fruit in the fridge. Sasuke could only think of one person who dared to take, or use, his tomatoes. And that person was in the kitchen cooking right now. Sasuke had caught Kabuto red-handed this time around.

"You took my tomatoes!" Sasuke accused, pointing at Kabuto and had the expression of a child who had finally managed to solve the mystery at the end of a Children's Clue game. And Kabuto had to say that childish 'oh-my-god-I-know-who-did-it' look didn't suit Sasuke at all. It actually made for a slightly funny sight though, and the older ninja wished he had a camera.

"They're not your tomatoes Sasuke. They're everyone's tomatoes." Kabuto pointed out, transferring the chicken onto a tray and then into the oven, turning around only to find the moody twelve-year-old giving him one of the most murderous glares he had ever seen. "And I needed them to cook something for you!" Kabuto added quickly. He may not like Sasuke, but he particularly liked his life.

"Hmp." Sasuke replied, turning and walking out of the kitchen, most likely to go bug someone else around the village or to write bad poetry and slit his wrists as he thought back on his miserable little life.

Kabuto laughed at the mental image he was getting of Sasuke singing a piece of his awful poetry while blood covered his arms and Naruto and Sakura watch in the back ground with a 'what-the-heck-happened-to-him' look on their faces. He then slowly made his way over towards the fridge and pulled out a hidden drawer he had installed just the other day. Bags and bags of fresh tomatoes were piles up inside.

Kabuto laughed again as he cut up the tomatoes and left them on the side of the cutting board to use in another part of the main course later. He couldn't help but wonder how long it would take Sasuke to catch onto his hidden tomato drawer trick. He secretly hoped he never did, because then it would be so much fun teasing him about the lack of tomatoes around, then he would suddenly make a small dinner out of only tomatoes.

No one messed with Yakushi Kabuto and got away with it without him having his revenge.