The man looked curiously at the old, faded envelope he'd nearly stepped on when he opened his door. He bent and picked it up. There was a post-it note on the top corner. On it was inscribed, in Tony Stark's scratchy scrawl, it's yours to keep.

His name was in the middle of the yellowed paper, in bold, broad, sweeping strokes. It was Howard's handwriting, no doubt. He'd met only one person in his life who'd ever put the little flourish on top of the r .

He quickly slit it open, anticipation trembling in his chest and pulled out the paper inside. Unfolding it, he began to read.

Steve.

I have no clue whether this will ever reach you. A part of me hopes it never does. I know we'll find you in the ice one day, but I don't know when. Where did you go, Steve?
Peggy misses you a lot. You'll take her dancing when you see her again, right?
We won the war, Steve. We won. And you aren't here to see it. You'd have been so proud of all of us, then. And we'd have been so proud of you.
No, scratch that. We are proud of you.

I got married, Steve, can you believe that? She's an amazing woman, and beautiful too. Never thought I'd settle down but, look at me now. I have a son, Anthony. Tony. He's such an adorable boy. He looks just like me, too. He'll be my best creation yet!

I miss you, Steve. I have everything in the world, but I don't have you.

I swear, you're everywhere in the mansion I look. Tony's your newest fan. He probably has every single issue ever published on Captain America now. All his bedtime stories are about the Star-Spangled Man. It's funny, the way you took over my life. I can't afford distractions, Steve.
That night should have never happened. It ruined me. How're you supposed to breathe when half of you is under ice? I know you're not dead. You can't be dead. That'd be a perversion of the natural order of things.
But I have to face it. I probably won't see you ever again. Did I ever tell you that your hair is the softest thing I've ever touched?

I have these nightmares, nightmares where you're trapped and I keep trying to pull you out, but I'm not strong enough and you slip away. You don't scream-you never scream. That's the most horrifying part. You had such a wonderful voice-I remember you singing "Auld Lang Syne". It still echoes in my ears and not even the alcohol can drown it out.

It's a hot summer here, all humid and too bright. The sky's the same color as your...

You would have loved it.
Had, been, was. I keep referring to you like you're dead. It's not the same without you and it's not been the same for twenty years now.
I'm coming, Steve. I will find you.

Howard

Steve crumples to the floor and does his best not to break down. He's already a jagged mess inside.

He wonders if the skin on Tony's back is as soft as Howard's was.

Steve can't keep any more secrets. Unlike Howard Stark, he cannot get drunk and hide.