A/N: Well... hi? -dodges pitchforks and kunai thrown- I know, I know, I should be updating my other stories, but I unfortunately did something very, very stupid. I told my friend and classmate on AIM, known on here as Tsukiken, that I was so bored, that I would write just about anything she asked for. Considering her pairing favorites, I should have expected it, but I had to go and ask. If anyone wants to read that particular part of the conversation, it should be at the very bottom.
Dedicated to Tsukiken for helping to spawn the plot bunny
Enjoy!
The Purrfect Prank
Chapter One: Not So Happy New Year
Hyuuga Neji woke up to an expanse of soft porcelain white, which rose and fell smoothly. He groaned as he sat up, grimacing at the faint but constant pulsing in his head, trying to blink the sleep out of his white eyes. His mind was unclear, his head was throbbing, and his eyes ached slightly.
In short, Neji had a hangover.
Which he promptly denied – noble Hyuuga clansmen do not become drunk, he was merely suffering the aftereffects of being intoxicated.
What the hell happened…?
His head still on the soft, smooth pillow, he reached up to his mussed hair (the bed was not a good hairdresser, despite whatever claims Naruto made), he started to comb through it lazily with one hand, vaguely wondering why something felt off. Then it hit him.
Or rather, his hand hit it.
It was a long, arched piece of plastic covered in what seemed to be fake fur, and as his hand wandered up, his fingers encountered a fluffy triangle that rose out of the band. Mildly curious about the foreign object on his head, he tugged on it.
A small cry elicited from his mouth in pain and irritation. Slowly, things began to become clearer as his dazed mind gathered enough intelligence to activate his Byakugan.
Oh, for god's sakes…
A headband, complete with brown faux cat ears and fur, was sloppily hot glued to his head. Not to mention, he was stripped of every piece of clothing except for his boxers.
Turning his eyes back to the ground in silent fury and resigning his fate to the gods, he sighed, and decided to go back to sleep.
That is, until he realized that he was lying atop of Uchiha Sasuke.
The Uchiha had apparently been subjected to the same horror that he had been, for a black kitty-ear headband adorned his head of black locks.
Black, luscious, sexy locks…
Jerking back in horror at his own hormonal urges for brainwashing his rational mind, he ungracefully smashed into a wall, which seemed to loom out of nowhere. Seeing a doorknob, he tried unsuccessfully to turn it, before looking up to see a number of clothes hung up on a rod. More specifically, he saw a bright orange jumpsuit.
"Ohayo!" called out an eerily cheerful voice on the other side of the door. So cheerful, that it made Neji's Hyuuga sense tingle. "Happy new year! How are you guys doing in there?"
Hyuuga Neji was locked in Uzumaki Naruto's closet, half-naked, and lying on top of an equally clothes-less Uchiha, with a pervert jounin on the other side of the door. And he had a hangover.
A perfect way to start the new year.
Groaning, he dropped his head in despair at his unbidden situation.
White eyes met furious slate grey for a split second before all that filled his vision was a fist and a world of pain.
Oh, how he hated the gods.
TBC
A/N: What is with me and these plot bunnies? I've barely planned out Just for Kicks and I'm already making another multichapter fic. -.-;; And if my bunnies are correct, there's yet another one coming up. Hopefully this one will be short and sweet, no more than five chapters.
Review, please?
Omake: Behind the Scenes of The Purrfect Prank
Now, if anyone is actually going to read this slightly edited AIM conversation that Tsukiken and I had, do keep in mind that these aren't our actual screen names.
And now, the chat that spawned the crack:
Boshoku : ...if onee-chan wants me to write something, she'll write it. She's very bored and pissed at her writers block right now...
Tsukiken : Oo
Tsukiken : Uhhh... :D NEJIxSASU!!!!!!
Boshoku : 0-0
Boshoku : Oh, crap...
Tsukiken :D
Boshoku : Why oh why did I have to say that?
Boshoku : Man...
Boshoku : Fine
Tsukiken :D
Boshoku : I'll stick kitty ears on em
Tsukiken :D YAY!!!
Boshoku : I'm being tortured
Boshoku : And yet
Boshoku : my mind actually wants to write it -.-
Tsukiken :D
Boshoku : It even gave me a freaking title!
Tsukiken : It's hentai-chan back with a vengance
Boshoku : x-x
Boshoku : ...
Boshoku : Lemon?
Boshoku : or just cuddling?
Tsukiken : ... Cuddle :D
Boshoku : And you're actually gonna want me to post it on ff .net
Tsukken :d yup
Boshoku : This is not going to end well...