The Saniwa idly watched the scenery from her office window, listening to the chirping sparrows which were perched on the branches of a nearby tree as she continued to work on the documents before her. Within a half an hour, a sigh escaped the young woman's painted lips before she slowly pushed away the document she had just finished.
The citadel's occupants had thrown a party for the young woman a few weeks ago, marking her second-year anniversary as their acting master. It was such a grand celebration that it took five days for the warriors underneath her care to recover from their hangovers and try to clean the whole building. A smile had been plastered on her face every time she stepped outside her office and bedroom in hopes of disguising the physical and emotional turmoil she had been feeling for months.
The young woman folded her arms on top of the desk and rested her cheek on the back of her hand, turning her gaze towards the abnormally large cherry blossom tree that bloomed on a distant hill. Once, she though that the tree was a beautiful and ancient thing-a nice addition to the Citadel- but it now served as a grim reminder of how beautiful living things also exhibit signs of weariness after a certain amount of time.
The uncomfortable void in her chest had become more prominent in the last few days ever since she declined in joining the Touken Danshi for breakfast in the great hall. It wasn't as if she was harbouring any ill feelings towards anyone but there was also the slight irritation that made itself know whenever she felt hopelessness take over her when gazing at a certain sword.
It was common practice that after she finished the morning paperwork, the Saniwa always walked the halls and personally checked the swords' well-being and saved meeting with some of the oldest but coveted companion swords she trusted-Uguisumaru and Ishikirimaru. This continued until an illness that she once believed to be a figment of imagination took residence in her lungs and with that the young woman had slowly turned to seclusion in hopes of easing some of the pain which came much more frequently.
Presently, books of medicine and research papers littered both the ornate desk and hardwood floors of the office. There were very few records of the disease and it was only after pouring over the different volumes of literature that she had uncovered the name of her ailment. It had been nearly a year since the citadel's master had read a short document which listed the various symptoms she had been experiencing.
Hanahaki.
A dry, painful cough would rack her body forcing her to bend over while covering her mouth in hopes of muffling the noise in fear of anyone hearing. Beautiful flowers poured out of her mouth, clumping in groups as they would scatter over the forgotten documents. It was almost routine for the Saniwa to examine the petals which would vary in different colours. A weak smile graced the girl's mouth as she noticed the petals had slowly turned into a deeper shade of pink and were accompanied with small twigs or leaves.
Deep breaths.
It was ironic to have fallen in love when the Saniwa had sworn that she would refrain from doing so when she recited all those ancient oaths. She considered it to be a form of punishment from the Gods, a cruel yet just one.
It was a miracle that none of the swords-or so she thought- had taken notice or become quite alarmed. She thought it was quite possible that a few of them had taken notice, they weren't stupid after all, but decided to keep it to themselves. A miracle would be what she needed but those only come to people who weren't oath breakers.
The pale hand of the Saniwa reached for the handkerchief hidden within her Hakamapocket before wiping her mouth. She admired the stain on the fabric as a small amount of blood alongside a deep pink flower petal decorated the outer most edges. It was almost artistic and something Kasen Kanesada would have admired if it was not a sign of her eventual demise.
She theorized that it would take a few more years until the disease would claim her and until then she would continue with her responsibilities and watch over the Citadel along with its occupants, no matter how laborious the task.
The master of the Citadel gently pocketed the handkerchief before brushing away the evidence of her sickness into a nearby container that housed various items deemed to be trash. Shortly after fixing the documents on her desk once more, a soft familiar voice called out to her through the sliding door which separated her office from the main hallway.
"Aruji." The voice of Heshikiri Hasabe passed through the door as he sat kneeling by the entrance. "Lunch has been prepared. Would you like to join the other swords in the Great Hall?"
"I'm sorry, Hasabe. I have too much work." The Saniwa answered quietly as she returned to working on the papers before her, adamant in finishing. "I shall stay in the office. Please leave it in the hallway."
A long silence passed until the Uchigatana spoke once more and his master's hand halted in it's motion as she heard the worry in her assistant's voice as he spoke.
"The swords are restless, my Lady." The Brunette quietly reasoned through the door, pleading for her to venture outside once more. "They have not seen nor heard from you in weeks. They are worried."
The still hand of the Saniwa remained poised an inch from the parchment she had been writing on. A pained smile appeared on the girl's visage as she continued the report she was working on before answering.
"Will it put them at ease if I joined them for dinner instead?"
Her eyes drifted towards the figure behind the sliding door which was previously bowed straighten up at the mention of her joining the Touken Danshi for dinner later that evening.
"Y-yes! That would be enough to reassure them, Aruji."
"Alright then. Please let them know that I shall join all of you for dinner."
"Thank you, my Lady." She watched as Hasabe stood up from his spot by the door before bowing. "I shall have someone bring your lunch."
"Thank you, Hasabe."
The Uchigatana quietly walked away but the floor boards in the hallway creaked underneath his feet, an indication that Hasabe was excited at the news of having their master joining the swords for dinner. The Saniwa bit her lip as she continued to write on the parchment before her, feeling her thoughts drift away as the seconds passed.
Shortly, she heard Horikawa Kunihiro approach her door, announcing that he had brought her lunch which was by the door. She thanked the young man as she continued to feign interest and read the words she had written but they passed over her head uselessly. An hour passed until the young woman gave up and collected her now cold lunch from the hallway. With a careful hand, the girl tucked in the unfinished report as she tried to eat the meal Shoudaikiri Mistutada had prepared for her.
A small sigh escaped as dainty hands returned the chopsticks unto the tray of unfinished food which stared back at her rather guiltily. Thoughts of a disappointed Mitsutada appeared and it was enough for her to pick up her utensils and try to at least make a dent in the food.
It took three hours. Three hours and a guilty conscience for the woman to at least eat half the food on the tray before giving up. She left the chopsticks askew and food unfinished as another bought of flower-inducing coughs claimed her. Currently, she found herself struggling to even keep herself upright, too dizzy and exhausted to continue with the rest of her work, and settled to lean back heavily into the back of her chair as she positioned herself into a more comfortable position. The young woman folded her stiff legs underneath herself and leaned her head back.
Tired and bleary eyes trailed itself back on the cherry blossom tree on top of the hill before closing, allowing her vision to be shrouded in comforting darkness. She thought about it. The disease that had taken residence in her lungs. The medical documents indicated that it is curable but there was fewer than a thirty percent likelihood of her getting a happy ending.
Possibly even less than that.
The papers indicated that for her to be cured of this illness she must (1) have her one-sided feelings reciprocated by the one she had fallen in love with. According to past medical records, there was only less than ten percent in the last decade that were cured of the Hanahaki and the data was enough to convince her that she was already fighting a losing battle.
She was the master of the Citadel and she fell in love with one of her most trusted comrades. Of course, if any of the swords would have caught wind of her dying because of this cursed disease, they would surely proclaim their loyalty-not love- although she was sure that they would claim that it was love in the hopes of keeping her alive. It had also been listed that patients who have been diagnosed with Hanahaki and had been falsely professed to never recovered. That was understandable. She would not stand having anyone lie about their feelings to save her and condemn them into a loveless relationship.
No there wouldn't be a relationship to begin with, she was an oath breaker. And oath breakers do not receive miracles. So, having her feelings reciprocated was out of the question.
A second (2) possibility for her to be cured of the illness was to have her infatuation redirected towards another who would willingly return them. This was one of the more unconventional methods of treatment and the numbers of patients which survive lower than the previous 'treatment'. An excerpt from a rather short medical record indicated that the very few number of patients who tried to divert their infatuation by loving another, who willingly and truly reciprocated their feelings, retained the illness for several years until it gradually disappeared. In this case, the process of finding another recipient for the patient's love was rather lengthy and an unsure path that gives no reassurance to a patient that may be completely cured.
That was justifiable since it was never easy to forget loving someone, especially a maiden's first love.
Lastly, the last (3) resort for a rather desperate patient would be to undergo extensive surgery on their lungs. This path was the most advised and had the highest rate survival rate for patients suffering from the disease. Although records state that the recovery time was long, spanning from one to three years, the patient would come out physically unscathed.
However, the mental state would a different case. Multiple records spoke that the most common side effect of this procedure was losing every trace of love towards the person they had fallen for. There was also indication that a small number of patients suffered from other side effects such as extensive memory loss to relinquishing every emotion know to man-turning them into a living doll at best.
The woman's first reaction after reading the one treatment she hoped to cure her was to laugh hysterically followed by the thought that it was entirely hopeless case, finally giving up whatever little hope she had left.
It was on that day that very same day the Saniwa began to drift further away from the other occupants of the citadel, choosing various excuses from feeling under the weather, to being too busy or not getting enough sleep. She eventually found herself both dining and working in the confines of her bedroom or office, very rarely coming into contact with the swords.
In a recent memory, she once heard the voices of some new swords-Nagasone Kotetsu and Ishikirimaru-who were being given a tour by the Citadel's secretary, Yamanbagiri Kunihiro. The Saniwa could tell that Yamanbagiri subtly brought the two newcomers underneath her opened office window in the hopes of giving the two and himself a glimpse of their elusive master.
The blonde warrior had seen the young woman almost everyday in the past for he had been one of the swords she started out with. The Master of the citadel knew that the said sword used every excuse in the book to deny that he deeply cared for her well being but in truth everyone knew that his words meant the opposite. She listened intently to the three as the two newcomers inquired if they could possibly meet their master but were immediately shot down by the cloaked figure.
"The master is rarely seen nowadays and mostly stays in her office due to work." The blonde motioned towards the open window of the Saniwa's office. "As a duplicate, I am unworthy of gazing at her face and I can only respect the wishes and follow the orders of my master…"
She listened as the three eventually walked away from the courtyard underneath her office before deciding to continue in with her paperwork, ignoring the ever-growing guilt in her heart.
It was a defense mechanism she created to both prevent the boys and men from learning of her illness and keeping newer swords from forming a close relationship with her. It was rather selfish but it was one way to ease the pain that would eventually come if she ever approached death's door. The young woman had grown quite attached to the makeshift family consisting of various swords even if she barely saw them nowadays. She would listen to the laughter, shouts and conversations as they passed her office, which encouraged her to persevere with her own work.
A knock on the door of her office brought the woman back to the present from her dark thoughts before trailing her eyes on the figure by the door.
"Was the lunch Mitsutada not to your liking, Aruji-sama?"
A grimace graced the Saniwa's features as she heard the worried voice of Kashuu Kiyomitsu through the Shoji doors. The auburn-haired Uchigatana stood by the entrance with only his shadow looming over the door. Like Yamanbagiri, Kashuu was another sword whom the Saniwa received when she first arrived at the Citadel. He took the position as her caretaker until she relieved him from attending to her when she hid behind the closed doors of her office and bedroom, urging him to attend to the ever-growing inhabitants of the Citadel instead.
Of course, Kashuu immediately confronted her from behind the paper door and thankfully there were the other swords who held him back from wrenching it open. The Saniwa had patiently listened as he voiced out his objection to the new duties that had been assigned to him. Once the Uchigatana finished venting on the matter, she gently reassured him that she never had thought of discarding him and instead outlined his importance as one of the oldest residents in the Citadel. The young woman also explained that she simply could not neglect her ever growing responsibilities as the Saniwa and thus appointed him in her stead to see to everyone's needs while she was busy-hiding.
"No. Not at all." The woman spoke softly as she turned her attention to the young man's silhouette behind the door whilst lowering her legs to the floor to get up from her seat. "The food was delicious as always…"
"You have not eaten a full meal for weeks and everyone is worried, Aruji." Kashuu spoke from behind the closed Shoji doors and the Saniwa could see the outline of his hand pressed against the thin paper panels and it filled her with guilt. "Rumors are spreading in the Citadel."
"Rumors?"
The master of the citadel slowly approached from the other side, hoping that the young man would feel even a small amount of comfort in hearing her voice so close to him. She understood that Kashuu needed reassurance much more compared to some and it pained her to see him suffer for he deeply cared for her.
"Some say that you have contracted some unknown disease explaining your isolation."
A short silence enveloped the two and the Saniwa saw the door slightly rattle as if Kashuu was repressing himself from opening the door. She knew that the Uchigatana would have slammed the door open to see her and she wouldn't have minded in the past but things were different now. Not even Hasebe dared to enter the office or her bedroom after she had announced that no one was to come inside the said areas unless they had been invited inside by her.
"How sill-" The young woman was suddenly cut off when she felt the familiar tickle of a cough clawing at her throat. The Saniwa immediately retreated a few steps back towards her desk and softly crouped into her hand hoping to muffle the sound but it was too late for the auburn-haired warrior heard her.
"Aruji?! Are you alright?!" The worried voice of the Uchigatana spoke from the other side of the door, the shadow of his hand was pressed up against the thin paper panels. "May I come in?"
"No!" The Saniwa unintentionally barked as she whipped her head up towards the door and relief washed over her to find that it remained closed. She felt guilt wash over her as she saw Kashuu's shadow visibly wince at the harsh answer. "I-it's nothing, Kashuu. I just drank my tea too fast."
"Are you sure, my Lady?" The auburn-haired sword asked once more. "If I may come in and assist y-."
"I'm fine."
The young woman bit her lip as she gritted out the cold reply before immediately regretting it. She watched Kashuu's already slumped figure visibly wince as if he had been physically slapped by her words. Remorse swiftly filled her being as the young man's silhouette grew smaller in the hallway and she stood quickly, trying to lessen the blow of her aloof retort by apologizing.
"I'm sor-"
"It's alright. It was out of line for me to suggest that." The young man spoke in a small defeated tone and to her horror even bowed low.
"Kashuu-"
"My apologies, Aruji." The Uchigatana spoke softly as he straightened up once more before making a motion that he was leaving. "I shall instead see you at dinner with the others. I shall wait until then."
Before the Saniwa could form a full sentence, Kashuu had quietly left and both the office and hallway was filled with silence once more. A tense hand slipped itself into the pocket of her Kimono to retrieve the handkerchief within. With bleary eyes, the young woman unraveled her other hand to see a clump of deep pink petals mixed with a streak of blood before she made a move to wipe it off before returning to work.
Dark eyes trailed over the small clock located on a small nearby table before the girl made a move to gather a few documents on her desk. The soft lamplight illuminated the small stack of papers before she enclosed them into a folder neatly. The faint chiming of the miniature clock's bell drifted into her ears indicating that it was time for dinner.
If she planned on sitting through dinner without hacking up a lung she would need to take some sort of precaution. The girl leaned down to open the lowest drawer of the ornate desk before rummaging through it. A small white vial soon found itself being emptied into her open hand and the last two pills fell out. The young woman's brows furrowed as she glanced around the office for a cup of cold tea only to find that it contained water instead making her sigh.
The medicine had been hidden in the deepest parts of her drawers to prevent any curious soul from seeing them-especially Yagen Toushirou. With a toss of her hand, the small container was discarded into the waste basket underneath her desk. She would need to remind herself that another journey to the capital within the next few weeks should be scheduled to stock up on some of the citadel's supplies and of course, cough suppressants.
The Saniwa eyed the pills before swallowing the them with difficulty then sipping a small amount of water before getting up from her chair. During this time, her ears caught the faint sound of footsteps making its way down the corridor as she lowered the cup unto the desk.
"Aruji?"
The girl's back stood straighter than a rod as she heard a certain Tachi's voice behind the panel doors. Her previously half-lidded eyes widened comically, almost akin to the size of the prized porcelain tea cup saucers that Mitsutada kept in the pantry-a gift from her. She remained where she stood as kept her eyes on the unmistakable silhouette of the raven-haired man behind the paper-thin door.
"Aruji, I have come to collect you for dinner."
She didn't understand.
He had been relieved of his duties as her night attendant and this was the first time he came to the office in months. She felt a cough threatening to come out of her lips but she held her breath with the hope of bottling it up. The Saniwa immediately scrambled for the cup of water in the hopes of soothing her tingling throat to answer the raven-haired warrior but instead the water filled her mouth too quickly forcing her to loudly choke on the liquid for the second time that day.
"Aruji!? Are you alright?"
"I-I'm fi-" The vicious cough she had tried to repress escaped causing the Saniwa to stagger heavily against the desk. The cup which she had taken a sip from tipped over and the liquid within spilled unto the front of her Kimono creating a stain.
Frantic hands flew up to the Saniwa's own mouth to catch the sudden onslaught of flowers and leaves which came pouring out. She felt her own body tremble as she slumped against the table causing a nearby lamp to be knocked unto the floor. The young woman's knuckles turned white from trying to hold unto the said furniture whilst preventing herself from sagging unto the floor. The girl could barely hear the frantic voice of Mikazuki as a loud ringing echoed through her ears. White spots have begun to appear in her line of vision forcing her to lean her upper body and close her eyes as she felt the room swirled around her.
"Aruji-sama!?"
"F-fine!" The girl weakly answered after taking a much-needed breath while using her own hand to wipe her mouth quickly. "I'm fine, Mika-"
The doors to the office slammed open and the Saniwa whipped her head towards the door expecting to meet the single worried visage of her old nighttime attendant but she quickly stiffened. She met not one but half-a-dozen eyes that gazed upon her half-crumpled form beside the desk. The master of the citadel couldn't help but stare at the swords dumbly until it slowly dawned upon her that she hadn't heard them coming from the hallway. She saw the grim and worried faces of the Touken Danshi who stood by the door as she remained half-kneeling on the slightly damp floor.
"Are you hurt, my Lady?" Hasebe quickly entered the office, disregarding the cluttered state that it was currently in but was immediately cut off.
"A-Aruji-sama!" Midare and Namazuo Toushirou cried as they came rushing towards the Saniwa but was held back by their older brother, Ichigo.
"We heard Mikazuki-sama shouting." The aquamarine-haired Tachi supplied as he remained holding unto the back collars of his brothers' clothes, preventing them from overwhelming their master's own space. "Is everything fine, Aruji-sama?"
"Are you sick, Aruji?" Shokudaikiri Mitsutada asked as he took a step into the Saniwa's office hesitantly but his usually smiling face was instead replaced by a pensive one. "Kashuu briefly mentioned your lack of appetite."
"Are you alright, Aruji?" The Saniwa's immediately turned her head and found herself staring back at Mikazuki's bright blue-eyes which reflected the crescent moon. TheTachi's face had moved quite close to her own to the point that she could feel both the light caress of the older man's lithe finger and his warm breath fanning over her cheek. The young woman suddenly recoiled, forcing herself to pull her head back and snap out of her chaotic thoughts.
SLAP
The sharp sound of the Saniwa's hand coming into hard contact with the gloved hand of Mikazuki caused the other five swords to either wince or stare dumbfounded at the sudden action. The young woman harshly turned her head away from the man in front of her, feeling the prickle of tears as she remained in her position.
Silence filled the room and no one dared to even breath.
"Out. All of you." The young woman whispered harshly yet the swords remain frozen in their places. "Please leave."
"Aruji?" The soft unsure whisper of Hasebe's voice drifted into her ears which only made her eyes blurry with more tears.
The Saniwa could only grip the skirt of her Kimono as she stole a discreet glance at the Tachi who's gloved hand hovered over her shoulder. The tremble of the young woman's lips became more apparent as a breathless gasp escaped her lips. To her horror, she felt something warm roll down her own cheek along with the gaze of all six swords on her.
It was cruel how fate continued to torture her.
"Are you deaf!?" The thunderous shout of the woman echoed even into the hallway. "I SAID GET OUT!"
The younger pair of swords visibly winced at the command but none made a move leave. Midare along with Namazuo were eventually ushered by Ichigo outside who silently sent their master a worried glance before being followed suit by Hasebe and Mitsutada.
"B-but-!" The two Tantous cried in disagreement as their brother prodded them into the hallway before quietly bowing deeply.
"We apologize for coming inside uninvited, Aruji-sama." Ichigo softly spoke before sending a knowing glance at his younger brothers.
"We'll go tell the others to start first." Mitsutada nodded towards his master and Mikazuki in the room before lowering himself into a bow as well.
"We'll leave the Lady to you, Mikazuki." Hasebe added as conflicted expression appeared on his face. The brunette turned towards his master and gave a deep bow before quietly imploring her. "Aruji. Please don't push yourself...and possibly come later."
Sensing both the tension and desperation of the older swords, both the younger pair of the Toushirou siblings silently bowed as well although both looked quite perplexed. Hasebe quietly closed the office door behind them after straightening up and giving the Saniwa one last pleading glance.
It was only the raven-haired warrior that remained within the room even with his master's outburst, not moving an inch. The soft padding of footsteps slowly drifted away from the office which became shrouded in stillness. The Saniwa kept her face turned away until she felt the cool hands of Mikazuki taking hold of her own.
"Aruji."
"Why aren't you leaving!?"
Without sparing the man a glance nor moving her head, the young woman wretched her hands away before quickly slapping away the gloved hands of the handsome man once more.
SLAP
The Saniwa struggled hard against the firm grip of the Tachi and eventually found herself unable to pull neither of her hands free. Throughout the whole ordeal, the young woman kept her face lowered from the man in the hope of hiding the shameful tears that were silently flowing down her face. The tears fell faster and her hair had begun to cling unto her damp cheeks making her uncomfortable although she made no move to dry them.
"Aruji-sama."
The Saniwa bit her lip as she closed her eyes, unable to meet those bright blue eyes. She felt the constricting pain in her chest increase as she continued to weakly struggle against the man. Eventually, she found herself pushed up against the side of her desk with the trash bin knocked over beside her. The sound of her labored breathing filled the space between the two individuals.
"Why?"
The room was still for a moment before the girl felt the cool hands of Mikazuki gently wiping away the tears and her damp locks away from her cheek. The Saniwa allowed the raven-haired warrior to tilt her chin up without resistance and meet his dark eyes. She could tell that he was distraught with her drastic change of attitude towards both him and his fellow swords but thankfully, he did not press her for anything.
"Aruji."
The Saniwa was then presented with the bloody handkerchief which no longer remained on her being. The sight of the stained fabric made her stiffen and avert her eyes before shaking her head weakly. She felt Mikazuki release her gently after ensuring that she would not escape, not that she would even attempt to-with him so close to her.
"Is this…" The Tachi spoke softly as he lowered the handkerchief into the space beside the young woman's lap. "…why you have been in hiding?"
"I-I'm not sick-"
"Aruji, No one in the Citadel has seen you for months." Mikazuki interrupted as he saw the young woman visibly wince before adding. "Even your attendants have not been granted an audience."
The Saniwa merely shook her head again before turning her head and covering her mouth to cough into it. Bright golden-blue eyes watched in both horror and surprise at the flurry of dark flowers coming from his master's mouth as her small figure shook in effort to clear her throat. The man beside her gently raised his hand to gently rub his master's back, relived that she did not make a move to move away from his touch when he reached up to wipe away the stray petals and blood from her mouth. The two individuals sat together in the dark quietly until Mikazuki broke the stillness once more.
"How long have you been sick?"
"I told you I am not sick." The Saniwa answered exasperatedly as she fiddled with the edges of her kimono.
"This is serious, Aruji-sama." Warm hands found themselves wrapped around the young woman's cold ones forcing the girl to meet the handsome man's grim gaze with no sign of the usual passive smile he wore. "Why have you not seen Yagen-kun or a doctor?"
"…Because neither Yagen-kun or all the doctors in the capital can cure me, Mikaji."
I love you.
A small pained smile creeped into the young woman's visage as she closed her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again to turn her attention to the man who remained seated beside her. With a sudden burst of confidence, she reached up to tug at the Tachi's sleeve to pull him closer but not close enough for their bodies to touch, surprising him as she whispered softly in his ear.
"I am sorry for hurting you..."
The raven-haired sword retained his rigid form before blinking twice at the sudden revelation. The grip on his sleeve remained deathly still, preventing him from pulling away to see the pained expression on her face. Unable to fight the small urge, the girl allowed herself to gently lean unto the figure clad in blue who remained silent as his master continued to whisper.
"I'm glad you cared for me, Mikazuki..."
I love you.
With the flick of the Saniwa's hand, she released the Tachi from her grip and push him away gently. She slowly raised herself from the ground and made her way over to the opposite side of the desk. The smile which she plastered on her face trembled ever so slightly as she met the astonished gaze of the of the raven-haired sword on the other side of her desk.
"Saniwa-sama?"
The confused look on the man's face weakly tugged at her heart and forcing the Citadel's master to avert her own gaze once more before slowly edging away from the Tachi. The young woman immediately placed some distance between her and the man as she made a move towards the door, an indication that she was finished with conversation before speaking once more.
"You should go join them for dinner, Mikazuki." The Saniwa whispered weakly before meeting the older man's eyes and flashing him a pained smile. "Thank you for thinking about my well-being…but I will be fine from here."
I love you.
"Goodnight, Mikazuki."
There was no point in harboring any illness towards the sword who did his best to serve her. He was after all, a sword-an inanimate object which had been given a human body-who had no experience in love. She knew how much it hurt to have the truth shoved in her face but it was still painful. She will learn to live with the disease and with Mikazuki Munechika by her side even if he would never love her.
I love you so much.
But he didn't love her back.