Disclaimer: This is a parody of "Jesse's Girl" by Rick Springfield.
Mr. Garrison:
Mr. Hat is a
friend
Yeah I know he's been a good friend of mine
But lately
something's changed
And it ain't hard to define
Mr. Twig's
got Mr. Hat,
But I wanna make him mine!
And he's watching
him with those eyes
And he's lovin' that sexy hat I just know
it
And he's holding him in his arms late late at night
You know
I wish that I had Mr. Hat
I wish that I had Mr. Hat
Where can I
find a puppet like that?
I play along with this charade
There
doesn't seem to be a reason to change
You know I feel so evil when
they start talking cute
I wanna tell him that I love him
But
Mr. Twig is a FUCKING WHORE and he's keeping Mr. Hat to himself,
GODDAMMIT!
Cause he's watching him with those eyes
And he's
lovin' him with that hat I just know it
And he's holding him in
his arms late late at night
You know I wish that I had Mr. Hat
I
wish that I had Mr. Hat
Where can I find a puppet like that?
Mr.
Twig can go to hell,
'Cause I want Mr. Hat
Where can I find
a puppet
Where can I find a puppet like that?
When I'm
lookin' in the mirror all the time
Wonderin' what Mr. Hat don't
see in me
I've been evil, I've been cool with trying to kill Cathy
Lee Gifford
Ain't that the way love's supposed to be?
Tell
me where can I find a puppet like that?
You know I wish that I had
Mr. Hat
I wish that I had Mr. Hat
Mr. Twig can go to hell and
BURN
Because I want Mr. Hat
I wish that I had Mr. Hat
I
want, I want Mr. Hat
Mr. Twig can go to hell and die!
That
son of a bitch can GO TO HELL AND HE CAN DIE,
BECAUSE I WANT MR.
HAT!
I
WANT MR. HAT…
I want Mr. Hat…
I want Mr. Hat…
…..
…
.
Oh well, Mr. Slave'll do!
Mr. Mackey: Mmmkay!
Mr. Slave: Oh, Jesus, Jesus Christ!