I just finished watching Age of Ultron (yes I know I'm very late to the party, but I was scared because it looked like it would be heart breaking. I was right) and I ship Natasha and Bruce so badly right now! They're so cute together!
Warnings: Not a happy ending.
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A soft sigh fell from Bruce's lips as he dropped his glasses to the table and ran a hand through his hair. He had heard from the village grapevine that he was no longer the only new person around. He had known that it wouldn't be long before he had to leave again, but he had only been there for two weeks. He was better at hiding than that.
Though if he was going to be honest with himself he knew that he hadn't really put his mind into hiding once he woke up. The Other Guy had picked the place and he just decided to roll with that. If anyone had been able to track the plane he had been in then they knew where he was.
Being in one place for so long had made him go soft a little bit. He had been so close to getting everything that he wanted. That was gone. Now all he wanted to do was be away from anyone that knew him. To be another person in the crowd. He was just so tired of having people know who he was. Especially if they also knew who his other half was. That was just asking for trouble.
He needed a little peace and quiet so he could get his mind off of recent events. He doubted that was ever going to happen though. Every second that he spent not moving around or doing something his mind went back to them. To the Avengers and the mess they had left behind. To Natasha and everything that he had almost had with her.
A part of him hated that he wanted to be with her. He wasn't the type of person that deserved that life. Hell, he had no idea what to do to get a life similar to that at all. After everything he had done it was for the best that he ended up running away. Well, the Hulk ended up running away. Either way he was gone and he was terrified that one day he was going to get the call to come back.
Even with all that fear though he wanted to go back. He wanted to see her at least once more. She was one of the few people that he truly liked being around. One of the few that liked having him around as well. He cared about Natasha. Which made him doubt his 'genius' title.
He tried to forget her, but every once in awhile her face would pop up in his mind. That slight smile of hers whenever she found something truly amusing. The look she'd shoot at Clint whenever he did something that was just on the side of stupid. He couldn't help but love it all.
That was actually a problem. If he didn't care so much about the woman than he knew that it would be easier to forget her. That wasn't right. He'd think about her no matter what, but knowing that she cared about him as well? That was something different.
She knew who he was… What he was and she still wanted to be with him. She wanted to have a life with him. Not the life that he had thought about when he was younger, but somehow it was better than that. It was… Real.
Clenching his eyes shut he tried to ignore the way his heart ached at that. He knew that he had done the right thing by leaving. It might have made a lot of people mad at him but it was for the best. In his mind he knew that. It was his heart that was telling him something else. He messed up enough by listening to his heart.
A dark, humorless laugh fell from his lips as he thought about everything that he had done. All he ever screwed up. It didn't matter how far he ran or how few people were around him someone was at risk of being hurt. There was no place in the world where he could go to keep people safe. That didn't stop him from looking.
Taking a deep breath he picked up his glasses and looked around the small space he was staying. There wasn't anything there that hadn't come with the place. The only thing he had was a bag that laid by the door waiting for him whenever he decided it was time to leave and never look back.
It wouldn't be all that difficult to grab the bag and walk out of the village. There was never anything stopping him. Even as he thought that though he made no movements. He was tired of running. He was so tired.
A soft voice in the back of his mind told him that he could just give in. It was the same voice that he heard every time he thought about leaving a place. It always told him that it would be so easy to just finally give up. To let himself be caught. That his fight could finally be over.
As much as he wanted to do just that he knew that he never could. After the first time he tried to kill himself he decided that he didn't deserve to take the easy way out. He had to use what little life he had left to help people. It wasn't enough, but it was all that he had.
Making up his mind he picked up his bag and reached out for the doorknob only to have someone knock when his hand wrapped around it. A few days ago it had come out that he was a doctor and ever since he had been waiting for people to come knocking asking for help.
He wasn't that type of doctor, but he had learned a lot over the years. When he was in New York he had thought about maybe taking a few classes or picking up some books and learning more. He had been too caught up in science.
In the end he had missed his chance to learn something that could help people. All that happened was him hurting and killing people. Again. That seemed to be all that he was good at now. Squandering away his chances and hurting people. He should have known better, but he continued to make the same damn mistakes.
His heart pounded in his chest as he felt the Other Guy stir in the back of his mind. There were so many horrible situations running through his head about who could be on the other side of the door. There was a chance that he was too late. That the only way out was to lose control.
Knowing that he wasn't going to get out of it he forced himself to drop the bag to the floor before opening the door. For a moment the world seemed to stop as his eyes landed on the person on the other side. With everything that he was expecting he could have never guessed.
Without thinking he took a shaky step forward his hand coming up to reach out only to pull back so roughly that he stumbled back into the building. A growl from the Other Guy echoed in his head letting him know he was ready to fight.
"Betty," he whispered after a moment still not quite believing what he was seeing.
"Bruce," the woman greeted an almost shy smile on her lips her eyes bright with tears.
He blinked his eyes rapidly as he looked anywhere but at her. There was no chance that he was seeing what he was seeing. He was in the middle of nowhere in a village that he doubted people even knew about. There was no reason for her to be there. He must have finally lost his mind.
"Bruce," she repeated her voice and smile growing, "Oh, it really is you. I hoped… When I heard that a doctor had appeared in the village over night I knew… I hoped that it was you."
His mind felt like it was working overtime trying to figure out what to say. He was saved from that when she moved forward and wrapped him in her strong arms. His breath punched out of him as he stood there stiff as a board. It had been so long since he had been in her arms, but he never forgot how it felt. How safe and warm she was.
"Betty," he tried again sounding weaker than he liked to think.
"I'm sorry," Betty apologized pulling away so she could look at him, "I was just so excited that I might see you that I might have..."
"No! No, you did nothing wrong. I-I just… I don't… What are you doing here?"
"I came with… I came with my daughter. She's studying to be a doctor."
Bruce's eyes went wide at that. He knew that it had been a lifetime since they had been together and that her life hadn't stopped when his did. He had always hoped that she had found a good life without him. He just never expected to see it.
It had been difficult for him when he was in New York to not look her up. He had forced himself to not ask JARVIS to find anything out about her. Just the idea of knowing that she was alright in any way. He was… He was too afraid to ask those questions.
"I'm..." Betty started looking at the ground.
"Don't," Bruce said raising his hand to cut her off, "Please. Don't. I'm… I'm happy for you, Betty. I'm happy that you finally have the life you deserve."
A peaceful smile came to her lips as she reached out brushing his curls out of his face. He couldn't help but blush at the action. It was one that she had used to do whenever she wanted to get his attention when he was working. A shot of want ran through him just as it used to do.
"What is..." Bruce started to question before stopping to clear his throat.
"Yes?" Betty asked hopefully.
"What is she like? Your daughter?"
Betty smiled happily as she made her way to the table and sat down already telling him about the life she had. He felt a smile tug on his lips as he closed the door before following her. It was clear in her voice just how happy she was.
He loved how happy she was, but at the same time he remembered that it could have been him. If he hadn't experimented on himself than he could have given her this life. He could have a normal life himself.
Shaking his head he poured her a cup of tea as she continued to talk. As he took a seat across from her he found himself closing his eyes and getting lost in her tone. It was so peaceful and happy. It wouldn't be long until she had to leave. He wanted to enjoy.
"Bruce," Betty called causing his eyes to blink open, "Lost in that big brain of yours?"
"Something like that," he chuckled softly before focusing on her, "I'm sorry. What were you saying?"
"I asked how you were. I heard about what happened."
At the mention of everything he was trying to run from the man unconsciously curled in on himself. He was more than a little scared to know what she thought of the fight. Of him. He was so used to horror filled expressions whenever that topic came up. He didn't know if he could handle having the woman that he had loved once upon a time look at him like that.
A gentle hand came to rest on his own making him look over at her. Slowly she stood up and made her way around the table so she was in front of him. For a moment she simply stood there in silence before wrapping her arms around him once more.
There was a part of him that wanted to resist. He wasn't going to be able to have this again though. With that thought he let himself be pulled close enough to bury his face against her stomach. Hot tears filled his eyes as she simply tightened her grip on him.
"Do you know what I fell for first?" she questioned carding a hand through his hair.
"Betty," Bruce sighed already trying to pull away.
"Your heart. When I first met you I looked into your eyes and I saw that you were in so much pain. That you were so angry at the world. For awhile I thought you were going to be like all the other scientists that I had seen around the school. Then you opened your mouth for the first time and stuttered out your name and I knew you were like no one else in the world."
"I'm not..."
"You are that and so much more, Bruce. Don't let other people using you or the Other Guy as weapons make you think differently."
"I'm a monster."
"A lot of people are. You can control him. I know you can. That's something that not many people can say about their monsters. You are a good person, Bruce. I know you are."
"How can you say that? After everything I've done to the world? To you?"
"Because I can see you. Not what your father wanted you to see. Or my father or the media want the rest of the world to see. I just see Dr. Bruce Banner. Genius and all around good guy."
Tightening his grip on her he felt the tears slowly start to stream down his face and get soaked into her shirt. He cursed himself for losing control like that, but the Other Guy wasn't trying to break out so he let himself cry. He had no idea how long they were in that position but soon he forced himself to get under control and pulled back so he could look up at her.
When their eyes met she gave him another smile before bending down and pressing a kiss to his forehead. The action drew a shaky smile to his lips as he pulled back completely. As he wiped the last of the tears away she made her way back to her chair and sat down.
"Tell me about them," Betty demanded after letting Bruce get under control.
"Who?" he asked confused.
"The person that's on your mind."
"I don't..."
"I might not have seen you in years, Bruce, but don't think for a second that I don't know you. Now tell me the truth. Who are trying not to think about?"
"Natasha Romanoff."
"Natasha… Isn't that Black Widow's real name?"
"Yes?"
A laugh bubbled out of Betty causing him to blush. He knew that it was odd for him and her to be anything together. If anyone on the outside looked at them they were completely different, but he knew better now. He was starting to know her and he was starting to fall in love with her.
He had thought that he was never going to feel that again. Actually, he had told himself over and over to never let anyone that close to him again. He repeated that rule to himself more times than he could count. Natasha broke a lot of the rules that he had set for himself though.
"What?" Bruce questioned when she got control of herself.
"I was just thinking back on a conversation we had a long time ago," she smiled teasingly, "I asked you what you found attractive in a woman. You said..."
"Strength. I remember."
"You can't get stronger than Black Widow herself. She's good enough for you then?"
"Too good."
"I highly doubt that. Does she understand you? Everything you've been through?"
"I-I think so. I don't know. I thought we were good, but..."
"The fight happened?"
"Yes."
"Have you talked to her since?"
"No, the Other Guy ran off."
"Really?"
"I know."
"You know you can't just keep running right?"
"Betty..."
"No, I… It took a lot for me to understand that you were never going to come back to me. As much as I wanted you to be my happy ending you weren't. You could have that with her though."
"I don't deserve..."
"You stop right there, Bruce Banner. I have heard it all before. From my father. From the media. From every Tom, Dick, and Jerry who don't know a damn thing about you. They're wrong. You deserve the world."
"With everything I've done? I can't..."
"You're a broken record. I know you're scared, but she knows you. Probably better than you'd like. She knows the Other Guy too. She's fought with him by her side. You both know each other and still care. Don't let your fear stop you from having everything."
Bruce couldn't help but shake his head at her. Even if he wanted to go back to her the Other Guy had. He wasn't the type to do that unless he thought it was the right thing to do. Anyway, he doubted that Natasha would want to have him back at all. And he was going to ignore the fact that that thought made him feel sick to his stomach.
Taking a deep breath he took his glasses off and started to clean them on his shirt. He was tired and just wanted the conversation to stop. He had already made his decision and that was being as far away from Natasha as possible. It was better that way. Not just for her. For him as well. It was better.
"Bruce," Betty started her voice filled with sadness.
"I can't," he shook his head not looking at her.
"You could..."
"Stop!"
He heard the chair move against the floor at his yell and the familiar sense of self-hatred crashed over him. A growl echoing in the back of his head forced him to stand up and move away from Betty. He needed to calm down before he lost control.
"I'm sorry," Bruce offered after a moment.
"I know," Betty sighed softly, "I shouldn't be pushing you. I just wish you'd see yourself like I do. A wonderfully loving and beautiful man. One that could have happiness if he gave himself a chance."
"You're a good person, Betty."
"So are you. Please, think about what I said."
"Good-bye, Betty."
Standing up she came closer and pressed a kiss to his cheek. For a moment it looked like she was going to say something else. Instead she pulled away and started towards the door. A defeated noise fell from his lips knowing he would probably never see the woman ever again.
"I love you, Bruce," Betty said not looking at him, "Please, let her love you too."
He stood there taking shaky breathe with his eyes shut tight as she left. He had known that she was going to leave, but it still hurting being alone once more. For a moment he fought down the voice telling him to go after her. He knew there was nothing there for him anymore.
Picking up his glasses he went over to his bed and laid down. He was done with thinking. All he wanted to do was curl up and sleep for the rest of his days. It was too bad that he knew he'd be awakening from a nightmare before long if he fell asleep at all.
In the end he gave up on sleep after tossing and turning for what felt like hours. Betty's words were echoing too loudly in his head to let him sleep. He tried hard to fight her words, but they'd just come back louder than before.
He had been fighting to forget Natasha. To move on from the idea of having someone in his life for good. It didn't matter that he wanted her there. That every second he was telling himself not to go back and see her again.
Why couldn't Betty see that it was better if he wasn't in Natasha's life? That it didn't matter what he wanted? It would hurt for awhile, but he was used to that pain. If he went back though… There was no telling what kind of damage he was going to do to her. To himself.
A sigh fell from his lips as he moved so he was sitting up. Burying his face in his hands he tried to empty his mind. To forget how familiar everything was. He had done this all before when he had to leave Betty. Shouldn't he know better by now?
Deciding that he couldn't stand sitting still any longer he climbed off of the bed and started to pace the space. His eyes darted around the area trying to ignore the itchy feeling under his skin telling him to run. He was fine where he was. At least for the next little while. He'd give it another month before he moved on.
As he walked he found his mind wondering to New York and Natasha. He felt as if he was going to pull his hair out. There was no reason for him to go back. Okay, there was every reason for him to go back. Which meant that he should stay as far away as possible. He couldn't put himself through that again.
Licking his lips he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He started going through different formulas trying to get his mind away from everything else. Nothing helped though. He just kept going back to Natasha.
Shaking his head he turned towards the door and stopped. He might not have been there for very long but he could run. If Betty or her daughter told anyone that they had seen him then it would only be a matter of time anyway. Better to do it when no one expected it rather than wait to have people come around with guns.
With a plan in mind he grabbed his bag and started to leave the house when a thought hit him. It came out of nowhere and there was no real reason behind it but there it was. The idea of just writing a letter to Natasha.
It was one that he used to have often when he first started to run. He had wanted Betty to know everything that he had been dreaming of telling her. He had wanted to let her know that he loved her one last time.
Even now he still had letters that he had never sent telling her how much she meant to him. Now he wanted to have one for Natasha. It made no sense to him. He was going to see her again. The next time the world needed the Other Guy. A letter would do no good to anyone.
Still, he wanted to tell her that he was fine. That he was sorry for leaving her, but that it was better he was gone. He wanted to tell her how much he cared about her and how he hoped that she forgot about him.
Shaking his head he tried to knock the thoughts from his head. There was no point in trying to contact her. If he did then there was a chance he'd go back and try to figure them out. It was better if he disappeared from her life. Until the next fight.
Throwing his bag over his shoulder he walked out of the building and started to leave the village. He didn't bother looking back to see if anyone saw him. Even if they did he'd be gone soon enough. He could never go back.
It was with that thought in mind that he kept moving. His heart breaking a little more with each step that he took. He wanted so badly to be going back to Natasha. He was so caught up in telling himself off though that he missed the two woman watching sadly as he forced himself to leave once more.