Tomorrow.
Summary: PhilSam: One-Shot: Phil4Sam competition piece, my version of the whole London Eye evening. He told her that he loved her, but she was worried that he'd change his mind. Inspired by Tomorrow by Duffy. Please review xox
Tomorrow,
Will you bring me sorrow?
Today you say you love me,
Will you change your mind?
She had waited until he had fallen asleep, until his breathing had slowed. She had carefully removed his arm from her shoulder and had replaced it back on the bed. He hadn't moved, and she had managed to creep around her bedroom, finding enough clothes so that she wouldn't shiver as she made her way downstairs. She paused at her door and looked back towards her bed, it seemed unusual to have another person in it. The last had been Stuart, and that had ended as a nightmare. But this was her friend Phil, the man that had been there for years, for sadness, for happiness and for all the drama that her life involved. She wondered if he meant what he had said, as the two of them lay there together, her head resting upon his chest, their fingers interlaced together, each of them speaking softly to the other, about exactly what, she struggled now to remember. As soon as those three little words came out of his mouth the whole day had managed to disappear, and she could hear nothing but his repeated voice. She hadn't said anything back to his statement, but she had turned to look upwards at him, his blue eyes sparkling even in the semi-darkness of her room, and then he had leant down to kiss her and she had reciprocated, anything to prevent him from saying it again, and her needing some sort of response.
She didn't know what it was with those words that last one in particular. Love, why did that word make her stomach churn? She hardly ever said it, even to her own daughter, and that was perhaps why she lived miles away. Even when Sam was younger the word wasn't thrown around, she had thought that her parents loved her, at least she hoped that they did. But as soon as Abi arrived, even in the form of a pregnancy test they had turned against her, and that apparent love that they had for her had seemed to disappear. Glen had told her that he loved her, but he lied to her, and her life had fallen apart once again. Perhaps it was no wonder that that word made her shudder and want to run. But this time did she shudder because; it was what she always did? Or did she shudder because she knew that deep down in the place where she locked her feelings away, she really did love Phil Hunter, no matter what she had been through in the past, and was she just running now because of habit? How did she know? She tiptoed downstairs, managing to reach the kitchen before she needed to turn on the light, the familiar surroundings of her kitchen swathing into view, the empty Thai containers balancing on the counter. The rubbish had been forgotten when he had leant in close to her and kissed her on the neck, nibbling gently, nothing had mattered in that moment, except for the two of them, and she had taken him by the hand, their fingers weaving together and lead him upstairs. But now the rubbish mattered, it bothered her that there was mess on her counter, even if she knew that it was irrational. She bent over to reach the plastic bags, and winced as she made her way up again, she had forgotten all about her side, and suddenly all that she could feel, was pain running up and down her body. She wondered if he had been lying about having painkillers in his jacket pocket, whether or not that was another Phil Hunter line, flirting with her, teasing her, daring her to challenge him, which was how they had always been, whether in hatred as it had been in the past, or more recently in passion. His jacket was leaning over the back of the kitchen chair, she wandered, or more accurately hobbled over to it, wondering if he had noticed she had gone, wondering if he had awoken to find her missing. She slipped her hand into one of the inside pockets, there was nothing in it, so she tried the next one, it too was empty. Sam sighed, so he had been lying to her, and maybe what he had just said was a lie too, something that he hadn't meant to say, and in the morning when he woke he wouldn't feel the same, and he would regret telling Samantha Nixon that he loved her.
"There is a secret pocket" his voice came from behind her, scaring her, almost making her jump.
Sam turned around, her eyes making contact with his masculine frame, his bare torso, and his suit pants slung around his hips, she didn't know whether to laugh or run, so she settled for a small smile.
"I wasn't making it up about the painkillers" he said again, "I knew that you would need some sooner rather than later" he continued, before he walked closer to her, his arm brushing against hers, as he reached inside the jacket pocket, his fingers slipping inside a smaller compartment, before they emerged, with a silver packet, and tiny white tablets contained inside. "You need water too" he said again, knowing that she perhaps didn't know what to say back to him.
Sam nodded, and took the tablets from him, watching as he filled her glass from earlier and then handed it to her. "Thank you" she managed to say, before taking the tablets and placing the glass back down on the counter. The atmosphere was tense, Sam not knowing what to say, not knowing what she should say, or even what she wanted to say. He stood there next to her, looking at her, the closeness of before missing between the two of them. She reached down again for the bags from the floor, and so did he, their hands touching as they reached for the same thing, then their eyes focusing on one another's.
"I meant what I said earlier" he quietly, as the two of them stood, each of them holding a plastic bag.
"Did you?" Sam managed to question, her voice finally appearing.
"I love you Sam" he said again, and once more Sam felt the shudders run through her.
"Will you love me tomorrow though?" Sam asked.
"Why would you ask such a question?" Phil replied, becoming, and not for the first time confused when he spoke to Sam.
"I can't be left high and dry Phil, I just can't. I'm old and ugly and can't take much more pain" she admitted.
"Sam, firstly you are anything but ugly, and certainly not old, and yes I will love you tomorrow" he said with a wink and a small grin.
"But how do you know?" Sam asked again, "How do you know that when you realise what I am really like, that you wont change your mind, and bring me nothing but sorrow" she whispered, as she looked to her tiled kitchen floor.
"I've already not loved you for years, I've got a lot of making up to do, that's how I know" Phil replied, his hand cupping the bottom of her chin, tilting her head back up to face him, "I won't change my mind" he whispered, before leaning close to her and kissing her tenderly, Sam sighed softly, perhaps finally she had found someone in whose declaration of love she could trust, and maybe just this time she shouldn't run away, so she kissed him back, before pulling away and whispering, "I love you too".
Please review xox