Storyline: Chuck left when he saw Nate and Blair kissing in 1x10, Nate and Blair stayed together for 10 years. Now 10 years later Blair finds out that Nate has been cheating on her with Serena, and they break up. Dan and Blair are heartbroken, and Chuck moves back to the Upper East Side. But what will happen when Nate starts to regret cheating on Blair, and when Blair realizes that Chuck was always there?
A/N- I don't own anything, nada. Thanks to my amazing beta Tatiana. :backhug:
title explanation: He doesn't care (Nate) & She(Blair) doesn't see.
He doesn't care and she doesn't see!
Chapter One: Hate Me (Part One)
Blair smiled at herself, though the mirror showed her bruises. She thought going to Yale and being with Nate would make her fantasies come true, butlast night proved that she was wrong. It had taken all of her strength, but Blair had finally admitted what she always knew.
Nate never loved her; well, not as much as he loved Serena. They moved in together right after college and got engaged months later. Blair worked as a freelance writer for a whole year, until she decided to create her own magazine: "Je t'adore ". Last night hadn't ended one relationship; it had ended two. Last night was the beginning of a life Blair Waldorf had never imagined.
The door opened and Blair hesitated, wondering if she ever wanted to see his face again, the grin he always wore, or his perfect hair.
"Don't mind me, I'm just taking my stuff," he said. His voice had a hint of revelry in it, like he wasn't broken at all.
And though she already knew the answer to her question, she asked, "Where are you staying?"
Nate started to laugh instead of answering. She had always hated that laugh. He gave her a postcard that was addressed to them. She looked at it and figured it was from Chuck.
She didn't pay that much attention to the postcard, and she sure didn't read the whole thing. Blair only read the part that said that he was is in Spain.
Charles Bass had left the Upper East Side at age 17, the day he got his heart broken for the first time. His mother lived with her new husband in Charlotte, North Carolina. That was where Chuck decided to live his new life, though he missed his old one. Just like his father, his interest in business grew and he opened his first night club at age 25.
"I'm staying with Chuck," Nate smirked, knowing that he had confused her. "Did you like the fake postcard?"
Blair could feel the anger growing inside of her. She threw the empty glass at him it, but hit the wall instead.
"Oops…you missed." Nate grinned, closing the door.
The tears and anger overwhelmed her frozen body. Why was he mad? She was the one that found out about his long-term affair with Serena. Why didn't he care? Was she really that bad?
The phone started to ring and stopped Blair from hurting herself.
"Blair, its Dan." His voice sounded destroyed.
She calmed herself. "Dan, how are you?
He laughed. "Like shit…I slept in my car last night. And I was wondering…"
"You were wondering if you could stay with me."
"If it isn't a problem, yes. If it is, then it's okay. I guess I will just move back home." Yes, because living with your dad when you're 27 isn't pathetic, Dan thought.
"Don't be stupid. Of course you can stay with me… Unless you want to stay with Rufus."
"Thank you, Blair. I'll move in today," Dan insisted.
"If that's what you want, I can always get your stuff from Serena's," Blair offered.
He was quiet for a while. "Really, you would do it?"
"Yes. I actually have to talk with Serena."
"Blair, don't do anything that I wouldn't do."
She fought the tears that were taking over and responded, "Fine…I got to go now, bye."
"Bye."
The sun shined like crazy and Blair hated it. Why didn't it rain when she wanted it to? Why was it sunny when she was having the worst day ever?
I
know it's sad that I never gave a damn about the weather,
and it
never gave a damn about me
She spotted some bastard's limousine blocking her car, and she furiously slammed on the window to the passenger sit.
"You are blocking me!" She yelled, only to see Chuck Bass.
Knowing Chuck Bass, Blair knew that he planned it all. "No welcome hug?" He asked when he saw Blair walking away.
"And you are…?" She asked when he caught up with her.
He laughed, amazed by how beautiful she looked. "Games are getting old, Waldorf."
Blair smirked. "Games aren't over until I say they are. Now let me go so that I can teach Serena a lesson."
"Still the same I see… let me drive you."
"I have my own car, thank you," she answered, annoyed.
"But some idiot is blocking your car, and you really should change your tires," he pointed out, smiling.
She looked at him, now angry." You are a jerk." He held the door for her and she stepped into the limo.
"I thought so," he told and gave her a big cheesy smile.
Blair
looked around, wondering why he hadn't told her chauffeur where to
drive; he still smiled at her…well, more
like laughed, actually.
"I'm meeting Nathaniel at Serena's."
"Perfect," she
hissed. The day had just started, and it already
wasn't a good one.
She took yet another cigarette.
"Smoking kills," he teased.
"Mind your own business, Bass. What exactly are you and Nate planning?"
He grinned and took a cigarette from her. "Mind your own business, Waldorf."
Blair ignored him completely. Why be bothered by the Bass? The person that didn't have the right to come back, that didn't have the right to talk to her. She was reminded ofthe day she found out that he left. She could remember how she felt when Bart said it; the tears that she cried on the bathroom floor. Nate asking her what was wrong, not understanding that her other half was missing…that somehow he left and took her heart with him.
"Nate is my partner for the new club I'm opening," he answered.
"So you are planning on staying?" She hoped that he would say "no". She couldn't deal with him being there.
"Yes. I'm sorry about you and Nate…I really am."
And she knew that he meant it, because the look he had was the same one he had on her 17th birthday. The limo stopped, and Chuck reached for Blair's hand. She held onto it as tightly as she could, as ifshe never wanted to let go.
"Let's go," she demanded.
He looked at her worriedly. "Are you sure?"
She freed her hand from his and answered, "Why wouldn't I be?"
Chuck would never forget the look on Nate's face when he saw him, when he saw him with her. Chuck noticed Serena's red lip-gloss on his face, her marks all over him. He looked behind him to see how Blair was feeling, to see if she was still there- she wasn't. Blair was already inside going head-to-head with Serena. Nate wanted to somehow stop the event that was goingto happen.
"Blair, I'm sorry," she admitted with a crying throat.
Blair walked in circles, trying to be the mature one as Dan's words haunted her "Don't do anything that I wouldn't do."
"I had this whole scenario planned on my way over here," she laughed. "I would slap you and throw you out ofthe fucking window." She walked overto Nate, laughing at his frozen look. "But then I realized that you two don't deserve to have me care. You don't deserve my anger, and you, Serena, don't deserve Dan."
Serena looked at Nate, surprised by her statement, and realized that Blair was right. They weren't heroes in the movie—they were villains. Villains that didn't have the right to explain their actions.
"I'm here to pick up Dan's stuff. He's staying with me. And guess what, S? I only have one bed…Well, we can always share," though Blair was disguised with her words, she knew that she was winning.
"Games are getting old, Blair," Serena added, like it all was Blair's fault.
"No, the games started when you decided to fuck my fiancé." And Serena knew that Blair was right, she knew that she shouldn't care about where Dan would spend his nights…but she did.
"I guess you win."
Blair shook her head heading over to the bedroom. "No, I lost…big time," she said sadly, taking the last of Dan's clothes.
And Nate wanted to say something, he really did, but he couldn't. All the words would come out wrong; the meaning of the words would fail. Leaving Blair seemed so easy, but seeing her standing there made his heart race faster and faster until he snapped out of it.
Nate's mother's engagement ring was still on her finger, waiting to get loose. "Explain to your parents why we aren't engaged anymore," Blair told him, giving him the ring.
Chuck could see the hurt she had inside of her, the pain that was taking over her body. But his lips were sealed—he couldn't say a word. Before leaving, Blair turned to Chuck, her brown eyes staring at him with passion. "I would think twice about workingwith Nate if I were you…he's beenknown to cheat."
The truth in Blair's words hurt Nate in a way he hadnever been hurt before, he knew that she was right, and he hated it.
"Welcome back, Chuck," Serena said and forced a smile. Though Chuck didn't want a hug from her, he accepted it anyway.
"Do you want something to drink?" Nate asked, and Chuck shook his head. Finally, he thought.
"Actually, I have to go now. Thanks for everything," he added quickly. It wasn't planned: getting the butterflies back wasn't the plan. The plan was telling Blair how muchbetter off he was without her.
He stopped at her building and walked back and forth. Chuck Bass hadnever thought about anyone else the way he thought about her. He wanted to kiss her and tangle his fingers in her perfect brown hair. But he knew that she loved Nate. God, it was always Nate; it was never him.
Chuck remembered when they were 13, and Nate couldn't think of what she wanted for her birthday. Nate accidentally forgot about her birthday, and Chuck had chosen the proper birthday present for her instead. The look on Blair's face when she openedit and saw the red headband was overwhelming. She gave Nate the biggest smile ever and said, "I love it! Thank you. Only you can give me a headband, and it would mean so much more than anything." And then she kissed him, but she should have kissed Chuck—it was his gift. From that day on, Blair wore headbands to remember her how much Nate loved her…yes, Nate.
And there he was standing, still looking at the door. He hadbought her flowers, but threw them away…he realized that he couldn't go in. He decided to come back later when he hadcleared him mind, when everything would be easier.
Blair Waldorf drowned herself in tears; her dark brown eyes became darker. She turned off the light to the bathroom; she turned on the radio and lay in the bathtub. The cold water was making her whole body shake and shiver as she wrote:
Mother Nature with its beauty and fame never was a fan of mine.
Held me up through sleepless nights and made me cry over a boy.
Just a kiss and some love was all that I wanted.
But now I see the wishes giving hope to someone else.
Her blonde hair matches his, their bodies collide, and I want to die.
"I don't want you anymore" he said, made my heart break in pieces.
And now he's back with hurt and compassion.
Mother Nature, I know that you were never a fan of mine, but I wonder
When, oh when, will you let me die?
The next song that was being played was "Hate Me" by Blue October. As the chorus began, Blair suddenly broke down all over again, singing along:
"Hate
me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't
do for you"
Blair heard the doorbell, but simply didn't care and continued to sing.
"Hate
me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can
finally see what's good for you."
You know the feeling you get when someone you love is in trouble? Well, Chuck had that feeling. His heart wanted to explode as he knocked on her door- she still didn't open, even though he knew that she was there. He could hear the music. His hands were shaking as he yelled, "BLAIR! OPEN THE DOOR, I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!"
Every possible scenario was popping into his head. What if she was hurt? What if she had hurt herself?
His heart started tobeatharder, and he decided to call her. No one answered. He knew that trying to open the door was pointless, but he did it anyway. A smile came over his face once he realized the door was unlocked.
"BLAIR!" He screamed out loud. No one answered, but the radio was on and he could hear the music.
And I said smile the way you used to be.
He found her underneath the water, almost not breathing. Her body was cold as he pressed it against his.
"Let go of me," Blair yelled, hitting him.
Chuck couldn't care less that she took out all her anger on him—he was justhappy to see her being Blair, to see her alive.
"Hit me."
And she did what he told her to do. She hit him, hit his chest the hardest that she could manage
"How could he do this to me?" She cried, falling into his arms.
"I don't know," he replied, grabbing a towel and wrapping her in it.
And you whispered, "how could you do this to me?"
Blair put on some clothes and walked over to Chuck. She could see the anger in his eyes. "You think I tried to kill myself."
"No, I don't," he replied, annoyed.
"Yes, you do."
"Fine, yes. I think that you wanted to kill yourself. Happy?"
She put on a smirk. "Yes."
"I'm not judging you. What Serena and Nate did to you was horrible."
"And I'm not expecting you to judge me, "she hissed.
"Why didn't you visit me when Nathaniel did? You always made some kind of excuse," he said, quickly changing the subject.
Blair knew that it was true. Maybe it was because she knew that, even if she had been hurt when he left, she had hurt him even more.
"It had been years, Bass. I didn't know what to say or how to behave…it's been 10 years now, and I still don't know to talk to you," she admitted. She was finally being honest to him.
"You don't need to change…I don't want you to change," he smiled. "Blair, was saying 'hello' so hard?"
"Yes. For me, yes. I'm Blair…I don't just say 'hello,' because then I must say something else."
Chuck grinned as he tried to kill the butterflies. "You could have said something more."
"I'm late," she added.
He looked at her, confused. "Yes, you could have said that."
"No, I'm late."
The clock pointed to 5PM. "I should go, then."
"No, I'm late," Blair repeated.
"Well, I should go, then," he repeated, annoyed.
She laughed, blown away by his clueless look. "Chuck, I think I'm pregnant."
The information was too much for Chuck Bass to handle. Blair was pregnant? His Blair was maybe pregnant? And with Nate's child. And there it was: Nate again.
"Wow," he let out, almost not breathing.
"I know," Blair replied.
"So does Nathaniel know?"
Blair loved it when Chuck called 'Nate' Nathaniel. It made him more likeable.
"No, I want to be 100 sure before I tell him anything."
She was about to light a cigarette when Chuck took it from her.
"What's your problem?" she hissed.
"You might be pregnant, and the last time I checked smoking still killed."
She took the cigarette from him and replied in an angry tone. "Last time I checked I didn't give a fuck."
"Well don't expect to be 'mother of the year'."
Blair let out a laugh. "Please, like you are parental material…ha."
Chuck tried to smile, tried to laugh, and he tried to be his old self. But looking at Blair was like being back in high school, when everything was different. And she was right, she really was. Because Chuck wouldn't be a good parent. Not now, not ever.
"You're right I'm sorry, let's talk about something else."
She looked at him surprised. "Wow! Chuck Bass is sorry."
"I admit when I'm wrong, Blair. So let's talk about you and Dan."
"What about me and Dan?" She said in disgust.
"You know, you two sharing a bed."
"Never!" She yelled out. "He'll sleep on the couch for all I care."
Chuck laughed, but it was mostly a laugh of relief.
"But did you see Serena's face when I said that? Priceless, I tell you…priceless." Blair responded happily, but her smile faded soon.
"What's wrong?"
"I just…it occurred to me that I can't wear headbands anymore. Nate bought me my first one, I can't wear a headband without thinking of him…and I love headbands!" She cried.
No, I bought you your first headband, Chuck wanted to say. "So not only did he cheat on you, he made you not wear headbands anymore."
"Thank
you, Chuck. That makes me feel a lot better."
He laughed.
"Blair, don't let him control over you. You are Blair Waldorf,
and no one messes with Blair Waldorf."
"I feel old. This wasn't supposed to happen. Nate and I should be getting married. We should be livingthe American dream. And now…Oh god, Chuck, now I need to date, and I don't know how to date."
"Blair, breath," he joked. "If you need help with dating, I'll help you."
"Thank you, but no thank you."
They looked at each other, trading looks between an empty apartment. Suddenly, she started to cry, she didn't know why. Chuck started to laugh of her stupidity. "Oh, come here. What's wrong now?" He asked and gave her a hug.
"I'm here alone with you," she cried.
"Thanks?" He bristled, giving her a fake smile.
She held him tightly, tightly enough that she would never again forget the feeling: the feeling of being whole again. The pain was there, but it was being pushed aside by a different feeling: the feeling of belonging somewhere. Her black skirt matched his black shirt. They always matched.
"I'm a mess, and you are letting me be one," she complained.
"Cheer up, Waldorf. You'll always have me."
"And that's supposed to cheer me up?" She teased.
"Okay, I'm not a trustworthy person, or even a good person. But Blair, I'm here for you, because I'm your friend."
"You weren't that much of a friend when you left…without saying g o o d b y e," she responded sadly.
He looked into her hazel eyes. "I know, and I regret it everyday. "
"It doesn't matter."
"It does matter….it does matter tome. Blair, I never meant to hurt you. That wasn't my plan."
"Nate!" Blaircried out.
Chuck looked at her confused. "No, I'm Chuck," He began, looking back only to see Nate.
"What are you doing here?" She asked.
"I wanted to talk you," Nate replied, eying Chuck. "Alone."
Chuck didn't want to leave not now, not ever. But Blair gave him a smile and, with that, he knew that she would be o k a y.
When he left, Blair and Nate stood face-to-face. Something inside of her wanted to break, and her hands were so cold…almost f r o z e n.
"Blair, I wanted to say that I'm sorry for everything. We fell in love, and I know that that explanation sucks."
Blair cut in. "I agree, it sucks, and now you said it…So goodbye."
But he didn't. He juststood there, not moving. He wouldn't go, yet he didn't care. He didn't love her enough; he didn't want to. Outside, the rain started to fall, the gods heard Blair's prayers, heard her wish to die. But Blair knew, she knew that if she could survive the day without breaking, she could survive anything.
"Don't you see that I'm trying here, Blair? I want us to be friends." He said.
She laughed,barely breathing. "Friends? Are you serious? You don't care, Nate. That's the problem, you don't care…and you never will. And I'm done trying to make you care."
"Don't say that."
"Just get out Nate. Get out from my apartment," she yelled, almost falling down.
"Blair, I…."
"No, don't you 'Blair' me anything. Just get out, you didn't care for me back then, and you don't need to start now."
"Fine, I'll go. But I'll be back…I promise," he told her, sounding weirdly broken.
And when he left, when he finally left, she broke down. Blair fell down on the floor and screamed his name until she lost her voice, until someone would come and save her.
TO BE CONTINUED.