Summary: Rinoa's life as a General's daughter is one of propriety and wealth, but when the unabashedly curt and hubristic SeeD, Squall, enters her life they instantly clash, and unexpected sparks begin to fly. SqxRi
Sideways
Chapter One: The Prodigy
"How about this one?" I asked as I stepped from my closet wearing a black, form fitting dress. I performed a small twirl and looked at Selphie expectantly. She stared for a moment, carefully scrutinizing the garment. Her face turned sour. She wasn't pleased.
"I don't know..." She mumbled as she tapped her thumb to her chin in thought.
"This is my fourth outfit change already. If we haven't found it yet then it's not the clothes, it's me. I'm the one that's fat and ugly." I said, defeated about this whole issue. I had been trying different outfits on for what felt like hours. It was beginning to feel like a lost cause.
"No. There's a dress in there somewhere that is just crying out for you to wear it. It's screaming 'let me be the one that gets you laid tonight, Rinoa!'" Selphie said as she made her way into my closet again. She began to skim the racks, pulling dresses out from their homes to examine them closely, only to shove them back in.
"I'm not getting laid tonight." I said, quite severely.
"Oh, whatever you chastity belt wearing loser." Selphie teased as she looked at another dress.
"Okay, firstly I don't wear a chastity belt and second of all I've talked to him, what, three times, if that. Sex is the last thing on my mind." I assured as I glanced over my jewelry. "Just getting him to dance with me tonight will be a milestone leap."
"Yawn. Boring." Selphie dead-panned. "Your love life is so dull." She said with a shake of her head.
"Thanks." I mumbled as I pulled a few pieces of jewelry out.
"Huh! Oh my gosh..." Selphie exclaimed as she pulled a dress off the rack. "This one." She whispered excitedly as she held up a white floral dress. Her face beamed excitement and optimism. But the dress held no obvious magic in it that would make me look twice.
"Really?" I asked, a little skeptical.
"Really!" She insisted with a bright smile as she shoved the dress into my hands. "I have a feeling this is the one." She assured as she clapped her hands excitedly and made her way out of my closet. She seemed awfully confident, but I wasn't seeing the same thing she was.
I sighed as I looked at the dress. If this wasn't the one then I was tossing the towel in. Tonight was simply not meant to be if this one wasn't going to work. I slipped the dress on, already feeling ugly in it. I smoothed it out and stepped out of the closet with a look of premature disappointment on my face. Selphie didn't even need to say anything. I knew it was atrocious.
"I was so right." Selphie said with an eager smile.
Oh, that's why I couldn't find a dress. Selphie just had poor taste.
"You're kidding." I laughed.
"No, no! Look at yourself!" She commanded as she brought me in front of my full length mirror. Hmm... I guess it wasn't that bad. No, it wasn't bad at all. It was great actually! Selphie had done right.
"Wow." I mumbled as I continued to examine myself in the mirror.
"You look simply stunning." Selphie said with a proud, motherly smile as she rested her chin on my shoulder.
"Do I look perfect?" I asked.
"Of course!"
"Tonight has to be perfect." I turned to her, holding her hands in my own. I was becoming nervous. Now with the dress issue out of the way, I was left to deal with the anxiety of what tonight's dinner would bring.
"It'll be fine." She assured. She looked at me quizzically. "You look nervous. Why are you nervous?"
"Well, I'm just nervous about tonight." I mumbled as I pulled away from her.
"What are you talking about? We've done these banquets thousands of times." Selphie reminded. But that wasn't what I was nervous about at all. I had no reason to be nervous about anything event oriented.
"Not that." I said shyly, afraid to admit my real reason.
"Seifer?" She asked. She read me like a book. Was I that obvious? I nodded meekly.
"Don't be nervous!" She insisted as she placed her hands on my shoulders. "There is really nothing to be nervous about. Promise. Seifer is a great guy. He's nice, sweet, patient." She reminded me in an attempt to calm me.
"I know, I know. But, I just hear stories from you and Quistis all the time about boys and I see how you interact with them. I could never do something like that, you know? I can't be flirty. I just don't have it in me." I said. I sounded awfully severe upon myself but I was right though, and Selphie knew it too. I had an awful track record in the boy department. I couldn't flirt, let alone talk with a boy without making a complete asshole out of myself. I was raised a life without boyfriends. I was told I didn't need them, not until I was much 'older.' I had no idea what 'older' meant and so I learned, at a very early age, to just cut off all contact with boys I had crushes on. It would be easier that way I assumed. So I never actually learned how to interact with men I thought were even remotely attractive. Seifer was the first boy I had ever actively pursued. It was all thanks to Quistis and Selphie though. They had seen enough of my single days and pushed me and Seifer together.
"So, maybe you aren't the smoothest talker... but you just have to lather the charm on." She said.
"Lather the charm on?" I asked incredulously.
"Oh, you know... Just make him talk about himself a lot, then say 'wow, that's so amazing' and 'that's incredible.'" She instructed as she applied a mock flirty gaze to her looks. "And make sure you giggle a lot, guys love that, and when you've been talking for a while, just sort of sneak your arm onto his lower back. Guys will flip their shit over that." She demonstrated on me. "Just say, 'wow, isn't that interesting' and gently grab him around the waist. Works every time." She said with a laugh.
But I was still nervous and she took quick notice of that. "Just breathe. Relax. Be yourself. Pretend he's gay?" I shot her a look and she took back the suggestion with a sheepish grin. "Just act like he's your friend, you know?" She insisted as she gently rubbed my shoulders.
I breathed in deep and exhaled strongly. I calmed down a fraction, though it made hardly an ounce of difference.
We finished applying our makeup and accenting ourselves with my jewelry and we made our way down stairs to the foyer to wait for my parents. They were already there though, looking quite impatient and anxious fixing up any last minute discrepancies on each other's chosen outfit for the evening. My mother smoothed and patted my fathers bow tie securely into place and my father tapped his foot nervously, speech cards in hand as he zoned out into space.
My mother took notice of us and left my dad in a hurry.
"We're going to be late." She said, reprimanding the two of us for our tardiness.
"To be fair though it did take Rinoa an hour to pick out an outfit." Selphie pointed out.
"Yeah, but only because Selphie has poor taste." I mumbled. Selphie gasped and smacked me tenderly on the shoulder. We began a little quibble but my mother's flustered antics distracted us.
"My purse. Can't find my purse." My mom said as she stopped momentarily and let out an aggravated breath. "Now we're really going to be late." She mumbled as she began to search every nook and cranny in her immediate vicinity.
"Mother, we won't be late. We have an hour and it's only a twenty minute car ride." I reminded tenderly as I placed a hand on her shoulder in comfort. My mother instantly calmed and giggled a bit for her foolishness as she turned to me.
"You're right. You're right." She repeated.
"Here's your purse, Mrs. Caraway." Selphie said with a smile as she presented the purse to my mother. "It was right there." She said pointing to a hall table that sat directly in front of us.
"A sign of my old age." My mother said as she took the purse. "Thank you, Selphie. I don't know where I would be if your parents hadn't left you here in our care for these past few weeks. Tell them they can stay as long as they like in Trabia." My mother laughed as she gently patted Selphie's arm.
"Oh, if I tell them that then I'm sure they'll be more than happy to stay up north for years." Selphie said with a laugh.
"Oh good! A new daughter." My mother smiled but my dad stepped in immediately, halting our jovial ways.
"This is all just incredibly adorable and I would love to take a picture, but seriously, get in the car." My father commanded sternly as he ushered us out the door.
We piled into the limo and in the silence that followed, it became very apparent how nervous my dad was. His super sonic toe tapping, zoned out expression and sweaty palms wrestling his speech cards made it very clear to all of us that he was about to explode. My mother placed a comforting arm on his but he couldn't be quelled.
"Dear, you've got to calm down. This can't be good for your blood pressure." My mother reminded lovingly.
"I can't help it. Would you be able to 'help it?' I'm speaking in front of at least three hundred people. Of course I'm freaking out." He reminded, his voice high with nerves.
It wouldn't matter how much we tried to calm him, he would still freak out. And it wouldn't matter how much he freaked out, he would still manage to articulate an incredible speech as usual. This was a pretty regular scenario actually. He freaks out, we attempt to calm him, mom warns him about blood pressure and he finally manages to craft a gorgeous speech.
So it wasn't a shocker when at the banquet he managed to deliver a really amazing speech. Or at least that's what everyone told me. In truth, me and Selphie hadn't listened to it at all. We didn't need to though. We had heard it enough. The two of us were his test dummies on every draft he managed to write out. And there were a lot of drafts. Not one was any different from the last, though he insisted they were.
I could understand his need to perfect his speech though. This event was a big deal. This would mark the construction of the fourth Garden, currently be planned for Esthar city. A huge project indeed and a lot of money was being supplied for the project from benefactors. My father being one of them, his donation to the project being the biggest. So he was asked to present a speech at the banquet for the brand new garden. He had happily complied, but then immediately began to panic at the thought of public speaking. But he appeared to be quite well composed during the speech though.
Selphie and I were off in our own little world. I had zoned out a while ago, staring blankly at the table before me. I was woken from my imagination when a tap came from my left. It was Selphie with a folded napkin on her lap. She tossed the napkin onto me and I gave her a bewildered stare. Why in the hell was she throwing napkins? She made motions for me to open it up. I opened it and found a note written in permanent marker.
'Look to your right!' An arrow pointed to my right, surrounded by hearts and smiley faces. 'Seifer!' What? Seifer? Seifer was to my right?? I tossed the napkin back to her and casually rolled my head to my right to find Seifer's eyes grab mine. He had been staring at me!? We locked eyes for a moment but I quickly shot my head back to my father. Oh man, that was awkward. I made that real awkward, bordering on painful.
What should I do? Look back? I just continued to stare straight ahead like an idiot.
"Turn back." Selphie whispered harshly into my ear. I slowly swiveled my head back towards him and his eyes were still on me. I smiled casually and felt my cheeks burn with the fire of a deep red blush. I'm sure he could see my face turning all the more crimson by the second.
He was the one to break eye contact this time, but it was a far smoother transition than I had made earlier. I took my eyes off of him and looked back to Selphie. I bit my lip excitedly and she slapped my knee playfully.
"Oh my God!" She mouthed to me and I could only smile sheepishly in return. I'd go up to him after my father's speech and ask him to dance. Wait. No. That makes me look desperate. Let him come to me, right? Yeah. Good plan. Just sit back and wait for him to come to me.
I was about to ask Selphie for her napkin back so that I could write a note but a boy behind her caught my eye. I peered around her to find a brown haired man texting away... and during my dad's speech? That ingrate! He clicked his phone closed and made no attempt to hide the sound from anyone's earshot. He yawned loudly, not even bothering to cover his mouth. Was he trying to make me mad? Because it was working. I was getting all worked up about it but his stupidity wasn't worth my time. I grabbed Selphie's napkin and we began to pass notes back and forth until the poor thing was completely black with permanent marker. Once that fun had ended I turned back and focused on my dad as best I could. He was still talking? He must have been improvising a vast majority because it was never this long in the trial runs. But I could barely concentrate. That rude yawning man continued to click away at his phone and yawn as loud as possible. I couldn't think about anything else but the rhythmic phone clicks after a while.
Oh my God... they weren't stopping. Click. Click. Click. Yawn. Click. Click. Shut the hell up you freaking moron! I wanted to hurl my dinner fork through his eye. But I just clenched my jaw and bared it. But it couldn't be bared any longer. I turned to him, malice in my eyes, hoping that this look would a) catch his attention and b) make him shut the fuck up. He gave me a quick glance, acknowledging my gaze at him but kept right on clicking.
A flurry of hateful words swirled like a maelstrom in my mind until they all coagulated into one comprehensive image of him being smashed in the face with a mallet. That would satiate me for now. Just the thought of him being severely maimed would put me at ease at least until after the speeches were over.
My dad finally finished and a roaring applause filled the audience. I clapped along with the crowd, pretty sure that he deserved this praise.
More speeches followed, all each as boring as the last though much shorter than my father's (thank god).
With the worst part of the night out of the way dinner was served. Several older people came up to congratulate my father on his 'wonderful speech.' He would thank them, introduce us all and they would move on to bother someone else who was eating.
"Do they really have to come up to us while we're stuffing our faces?" I whispered to Selphie who only shrugged as she stuffed more salad in her mouth. I pushed on over sized bite of steak into my mouth... but nearly choked on it when I saw who appeared next to my father. Seifer leaned toward him and shook his hand politely.
"Seifer, correct?" My dad asked as he shook his hand firmly.
"Yes, sir." He answered with a glorious smile. I wanted to faint, but if I had I would have lodged the giant piece of steak into my throat. I tried desperately to chew it down so I could at least mumble something with my mouth closed. But things were not looking good. I had literally bitten off way more than I could have ever hoped to chew.
They exchanged congratulations and pleasantries.
"I hear you're quite the hero at Garden these days, am I right?" My father laughed as he patted Seifer on the back. He appeared uncomfortable with the gesture.
"Um, well I wouldn't say a hero. But-" His modesty was cut short.
"Oh, you're a hero, my boy! You stopped those Galbadian insurgencies dead in their tracks." My father laughed jovially and Seifer could only smiled awkwardly.
My father was right. He had been a hero the world over for his actions as commander of a small group of SeeDs. He had taken down several violent insurgencies occurring within Galbadia. Which is why he had been one of our guests for the past few weeks.
"Thank you, sir. I'm very fortunate that the Laramies have invited me into your circle of friends." Seifer said with a short but polite bow of his head.
Our 'circle of friends' as Seifer called it was an elite group of people. We ran with politicians, presidents, princes and kings and all of their offspring. My father was the general of the Galbadian army so we were obviously allowed admittance into this exclusive 'club.' It was rare to receive someone new into our circle of friends, but when a new face did show up it was often a guest that one of the many families would host. Seifer was just such a person. We loved parading the newest hot item around with us. The Laramies had quickly snatched up Seifer after hearing of his victories and had brought him to every social function. I obviously didn't mind.
He seemed to be the one man I could actually flirt with, and I was taking full advantage of it. We talked amiably and fluidly every time we were around one another. But I had no idea if he was flirting back or not. Maybe he was just being nice? I was far too inexperienced at this whole dating game to really know.
"Well, we are quite happy to have you with us, too." My father said as he looked around the table at all of our nodding heads. "Do you know my daughter, Rinoa?" He quickly, and quite suddenly, asked.
"Yes, I do have the pleasure of knowing her." Seifer said. He turned to me and beamed a radiant smile that could have made the sun jealous. I blushed a shade of red I didn't even know existed.
"How wonderful! Rinoa, you must dance with this fine young man later on this evening." My father insisted with a laugh. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not... but I hated him right now. My mouth was still stuffed with food and I couldn't figure out the right motor skills to properly chew. So I just continued to stare with a mouth full of food and a red face.
My father obviously didn't take much notice to the pained look on my face as he continued. "Well, Rinoa?"
Dad, I hate you. I hate you so much.
Seifer was giving me a blank and curiously nervous stare. Oh my God. I had to answer. Say something! Anything! He probably thought I was about to turn him down. No! I want to dance with you! Say something Rinoa!!
"I woosh luff foo!" I cried through all the food in my mouth as bits and pieces of it flew from my maw. It was all in slow motion. Bits and pieces of half chewed food bounced across the table, leaving trails of juices behind. And I felt all the ground work I was making with Seifer crumble from beneath me. All of that preparation for tonight had been wasted. I had wasted an hour of my life picking the perfect dress and for what? To spit up food all over the place and make a complete asshole out of myself? Great. Awesome.
I saw the disgust whip across Seifer's face and the confusion on my mother and father's face as they all peered at me.
Oh.
My.
God.
Kill me.
Please kill me.
"You alright there, Rinny?" Selphie asked quietly as she gave me a concerned look. I nodded as I swallowed thickly and against my better judgement. Wow... that was a lot of food to swallow. I can't breathe. Oh my God... I'm choking! I'm totally choking!
I began to hack and cough and gulped down water like I would never taste it again. It spilled from the sides of my mouth and dripped onto my dress. The food was washed away with the water and I breathed heavily, thankful to not be dead.
But I was ripped from my thankfulness over not being killed by the stifled laughter coming from the table to my left. It was that brunette haired boy. He was laughing... laughing at me.
I wanted to curl up in a ball and die. I looked back to Seifer and he looked completely weirded out.
"I would love too." I finally answered coherently though this time much weaker. Seifer smiled politely, not knowing what else to do. He nodded his goodbyes to everyone at the table and gave me one last look of disgusted disappointment.
"That was... interesting." My mother commented as she went back to eating, making sure to cut her food into miniscule bites.
"Very." My father nodded and went back to his plate.
"Selphie," I whispered delicately. She leaned into me. "Where is the nearest noose so that I may hang myself with it?"
"Oh, Rin it wasn't that bad." She insisted as she went back to her food. The continued laughter from my left told me otherwise.
"Did you see the look on his face? He was completely disgusted with me. He would never ever want to dance with someone who does that!"
"You didn't do anything. People stuff their faces all the time, Rin. Your timing was just a little worse than everyone else's though." She shrugged. That was not a comfort. "He'll dance with you. Don't worry." I prayed she was right.
I didn't dare look over to my right for the rest of the night, afraid Seifer would be looking at me aghast.
Dinner was over and the ballroom was open... and there was no sign of Seifer anywhere.
I should have figured this. The disappointment I felt was written all over my face as I stood on the outer edges of the dance floor with Selphie.
"Chin up, Rin! Maybe he's just looking for you." Selphie commented as she wrapped an arm around my shoulder in support.
"Thanks, but he left." I insisted. I was right. She knew I was right. No point in keeping hope afloat when it's destined to sink. Selphie understood this concept and she removed her arm.
"Maybe he's just hiding from you." She offered.
I gave her a look of horror. I had never even thought of that idea. Oh my God. He was totally here, avoiding me.
"You're right. He's still here. Just in hiding." I realized.
"Rin, I was joking!" Selphie cried as she hugged me for forgiveness.
"Are you two being wallflowers tonight, or have you finally come to grips with the fact that you're both lesbians?" A voice behind us asked.
We turned to find Quistis, three champagne flutes in hand. She extended two for us and we took them gratefully.
"Hey Quisty." We both greeted.
"But seriously, are you two lesbians, yet?" She asked as she sipped at her drink.
"No. Stop asking." I said with a roll of my eyes.
"Well then what the hell are we doing being wallflowers?" She asked as she looked between the two of us.
"I was stood up." I said sourly, not wanting to remind myself of the embarrassment.
"Seifer?" She asked, surprised. "No way. He seemed so nice."
"I thought so too." Selphie mumbled.
"Maybe he just had to leave on some urgent Garden business." I said, attempting to explain the awful situation away. I didn't want to count Seifer out as a potential boyfriend so soon. He felt like the last shred of hope I had in hopes of ever finding male camaraderie. Or maybe Quistis was right. Maybe I should just become a lesbian.
"Well, for tonight at least, forget Seifer." Quistis suggested. "Let's find you another man." Her eyes dotted over the gathered groups around the dance floor. She stopped momentarily and narrowed her eyes. She leaned into the two of us and spoke.
"How about him?" She gave a small point with her index finger to a group of four boys all laughing. The only two I could see though were Nida and Zell, two men I had known since I was in diapers.
"Nida and Zell?" I asked incredulously as I looked at her.
"What? Oh, no. Oh God no!" She shook the thought from her. "The other two." She said as she bent her head to peer further.
"Oh my!" Selphie exclaimed. "He is cute." She said with a huge smile.
"Which one? The tall one or the shorter?" Quistis asked, getting excited.
"Who cares?" Selphie giggled and Quistis giggled back in response.
"I still can't see." I mumbled as I tried to peer around the moving bodies dancing in between me and my goal. When I caught a glimpse... I was severely disappointed.
It was that phone clicking loud yawning stifled laughing jerk from before.
"Oh." I mumbled, making my dissatisfaction in the choice known.
"What? You don't think so?" Quistis asked. "Both of them?" She continued, a little disbelieving. Who ever was involved with that prick I wouldn't care to meet either. Zell and Nida just went down a few notches in my book too.
"Both." I answered.
"You must be blind. That one with the shorter brunette hair is way hot!" Selphie giggled excitedly. He was nothing of the sort and I was most certainly not blind. He was plain looking, at best. His hair was shaggy and unkempt, not fashionable in the least and the shine it held could only mean it had an intense amount of grease soaked in it.
"Five times hotter than Seifer. Hands down." Quistis said.
"Well, he's all yours. I wouldn't touch that mess with a ten foot pole." I insisted.
"Jeez, you must really be a lesbian." Quistis commented with a chuckle.
"No!" I shot back defensively. "I just don't think he's attractive. Why is that hard to believe?" I asked, quite exasperated on this whole issue.
"Right, well when you stop 'experimenting' with the same sex I want you to look at him again. I think you'll change your tune." She teased.
"Doubt it." I mumbled sourly.
"Well, I'm going in." Quistis announced to the two of us. Selphie sighed in disappointment.
"No fair!" She cried. "You get the hot ones every time."
"Well... early bird gets the penis. You know how it works." Quistis said as she strode towards them.
"Dammit." Selphie mumbled.
"You're not missing anything." I insisted.
"You're just saying that because you're a lesbian." Selphie said sadly.
"I'm not a goddamn lesbian!" I cried, possibly a little louder than I should have. I earned the stares of some of the people around me and I blushed from the embarrassment. We quickly moved away from the scene I had just created.
This is how it usually ended up at these formal events. It would be me, Selphie and Quistis for a little while then Quistis would hunt down the most attractive boy in the room and spend the rest of the night with him. That would leave Selphie and I to chat and wander around a bit until Selphie would be asked to dance. I would refuse any of the dances offered to me. I didn't like dancing, I hated it actually. So it would be just me and my champagne at the end of the night. And I didn't mind. I liked people watching anyway.
Tonight was no different. After Selphie had been asked to dance, I stood alone against one of the many marble columns that surrounded the dance floor and sipped casually at my champagne glass. I watched the couples on the dance floor spin around for hours. It never got old for me. I occasionally snuck glances over at Quistis chatting it up with the four men, paying special attention to that phone clicking jerk off and his taller, longer haired friend. I hoped they would never come around me. I prayed that Quistis would simply chat with them for this night only, and never speak to them again like she did with some others.
"Who are you staring at?" A familiar voice chimed in next to me. It startled me slightly and I looked to find Xu standing there, following my eye sight to Quistis and the four men.
"Quistis and Tooly McDouchebag over there." I mumbled against my glass as I took another sip.
"Those two men you mean?" The humor was lost on her. I nodded. "That shorter one is Squall Leonhart."
She said it with a certain amount of finality, as if I was supposed to be impressed.
"Dumb name." I said bitterly.
"He's to be the new faculty advisor at Esthar Garden." She said.
"So? What does that mean?"
"Do you know nothing of the Garden system?" Xu asked in slight disbelief. Just because my dad was funneling money down Garden's throat didn't mean I knew anything about its inner workings.
"No. Not really." I replied.
"Well, neither do I personally. But he's going to be the youngest faculty advisor in Garden history... by seventeen years." She said with a smile, as if the news had impressed her all over again.
"Wow." I mumbled. It was impressive, I have to admit. I mean, it would have been far more impressive if I had actually known what a 'faculty advisor' was, but it was neat nonetheless.
"He became a SeeD at fifteen, making him the youngest SeeD ever." Where did she get all this information?
"That's impressive." I said as I continued to look at him. He didn't seem like he'd be a SeeD though. He was laughing, chugging any and all alcoholic drinks that fell into his hands and his posture was nothing like that of a high ranking SeeD. He was nothing like Seifer. Seifer was imposing, proper and a complete gentleman. Squall looked nothing like that. An image of him laughing at my expense earlier this evening flashed through my mind and I got angry all over again.
I continued to talk with Xu for a while until someone called her away, which I was quite grateful for. She was a bit much sometimes. She always seemed to be running around with tons of information, ready to tell anyone willing to listen. I was her victim for the night.
With her gone I began to wander around, staying far away from the group Quistis and Squall were part of. The last thing I wanted to do was get involved with anything they were chatting about.
My wanderings led me out to the balcony. I leaned over the railing and took in the view of the glittering lights of Deling city. I loved this view. It was definitely one of my favorites. I was surprised I hadn't come out here much earlier. I usually ended up here after the first thirty minutes of dancing.
It was a little chilly that evening and I wrapped my arms around myself tightly. My thin shawl was of no help in keeping me warm. It was just an irritating obstacle at the moment.
I moved to the back of the balcony and took a seat on a bench. I was hidden from the entrance by a small well groomed shrub. This was where I usually sat on these nights, taking in the view and hiding from everyone else's.
But my respite was cut short. Two boisterous male voices made there way ever closer to the balcony. I prayed they would just pass by but my wishes were not granted. They stepped through and leaned against the railing.
Oh fuck me with a chainsaw.
It was Squall and Zell.
Zell pulled out a pack of cigarettes and handed one to Squall. Zell smoked? Since when? And Squall too? He was a SeeD for God's sake! There had to be a rule against that.
I decided to keep quiet and remained perfectly still. It would have been far too awkward to just leave and have them notice me, then I would be forced into conversation with Squall. So I just sat in utter silence.
"So?" Zell began as he took a drag. "What do you think of Quistis?" He asked slyly, raising an eyebrow in Squall's direction.
"She's hot." Squall admitted with a smile. "I'd fuck her."
Ugh! What a pig!
"Her friends are hot too." Zell said. I had to smile at that.
"Yeah yeah, the flipped haired one is cute, for sure." He agreed with a nod. "Who's the other?" He asked. Oh no... Zell, don't say anything. My prayers were once again not met.
"Rinoa Caraway. She was sitting at the table just next to yours. She has black hair, kinda pale..." He said. Oh my God. Zell, stop! Oh please don't remember me, please don't remember me...
Squall thought for a moment then busted up laughing.
"What?" Zell asked, chuckling along a little bit.
"That ugly oaf?" Squall laughed harder.
That mother fucking son of a bitch cock whore shit head piss drinking shit eating ASS HOLE!! UGLY OAF!? I was so mad I could feel my face ready to burst. I wanted to rip his jugular from his throat and stomp on it and then make him eat it. I wanted to disembowel him with every known weapon known to man. I'd frolic in his innards like I was a kid in a candy store.
"You think she's ugly?" Zell asked, quite surprised.
"Dude, she's a bumbling idiot. She spit up her food all over her family, totally embarrassing the hell out of that Seifer guy." He continued to laugh, just thinking about my misery. "And then she chokes and spills water all over herself! You should have been there, it was priceless!" He was practically in tears now. Zell chuckled along politely, not too sure what to do.
"She's pretty cool though..." Zell mumbled.
Squall laughed harder at that. "Doubt it." He said sighing, his laughing fit now over. "That girl is the ugly duckling of that threesome. You couldn't pay me to go on a date with her. She'd throw her food up all over me." At that he laughed again.
I was angry. No. I was pissed. I was fuming. I was so mad I couldn't stand it. I had never been this angry in my whole life. Who the fuck was he to go around saying that kind of shit, and to one of my friends no less! How dare he, that ugly ass shit for brains loser!
He continued to laugh and the more he did the more I felt I was being mocked. And Zell wasn't even standing up for me! Some friend that jack ass was!
"Oh my God! And her dad's speech! Don't even get me started on how ridiculous that shit was!" He exclaimed. My anger knew no limits and my restraint was wearing thinner with every syllable that slipped off his lips.
He was about to speak again through his laughing fit. But I couldn't handle another unfounded verbal tirade against me. I followed an impulse and shut him up. I stood and hurled my champagne glass at their feet. The glass exploded, leaving no chunks but only small sparkles of remnants.
Their faces blanked as they looked at the shattered glass before them, completely bewildered and a little fearful. Then their eyes travelled over to me.
My face must have been red with anger and my heavy breathing was sounding like a creature out for blood.
"Rinoa..." Zell mumbled, now fully cognisant of the situation. He was ready to fling some apologies at me but my hatred was centered only on Squall. Zell took notice and shut up quickly. Squall just stared at me horrified.
I couldn't find the words to express how deeply I hated him at that very moment. I wanted to toss him over the side and watch him free fall to his death. I wanted to break his knee caps and elbows and watch him suffer. I wanted to do some fucked up shit to him.
He glanced back to his feet where the pieces of my glass lay.
"Oh shit..." He mumbled.
That was it.
"Go to hell." I mumbled under my breath. It was all I could manage. I stormed off. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes as the reality of what he said hit me like a baseball bat to the boobs.
'Ugly oaf.' Of course Seifer didn't dance with me. I was a disgusting retard! How could I have been so stupid to even think that he would. Man, I was a real dumb ass. Maybe I shouldn't have been mad at Squall. Maybe he was just telling the truth. Seifer hadn't been flirting with me all those times. He was just being nice! He was just chatting with me because he didn't know what else to do with me. I'm so so so so fucking stupid. So incredibly stupid.
I made my way outside, pushing past people without much care to who they were.
I swung the doors open and relished in the cool air the street offered. I was breathing rapidly, almost to the point of hyperventilation.
"Rinoa!" I heard a voice call from behind me. I didn't really want to talk with anyone at that moment but I couldn't move either. I was just so ridiculously stunned and over taken with an incredible amount anger.
"Rin!" Quistis appeared before me, slightly winded from coming after me. "What's wrong? What happened?" She asked as she looked me in the eyes, concerned. I shook my head and began to walk away, down the street.
"Rin! Wait!" She yelled again.
"I'd rather be a lesbian." I mumbled to myself.
"What is wrong? Seriously!" She cried again, catching up with me. She stood in front of me and placed her hands on my shoulders.
"Squall is what's fucking wrong!" I yelled in her face. She was perplexed by my sudden outburst.
"What?" She asked as she removed her hands from me.
"He called me an ugly oaf!" I laughed through my hatred.
"He what?" She couldn't believe that.
"And he proceeded to remind me of how I was a big, bumbling retard who couldn't do anything right."
"Rin, that's not true at all." She said softly, attempting to calm me down. But I wouldn't have it.
"Psh, Zell wouldn't even deny it! Seifer ran away from me. I'm a lost cause, man!" I yelled as I threw my arms up in defeat.
"Woah, woah. What happened exactly?" She asked.
"I overheard Squall and Zell talking about how you and Selphie were hot and how he wants to bang you and then he started hating on me! He called me an ugly oaf! An ugly oaf! Who says that anymore? You only say that when you mean it!" I was all flustered.
"Hey! Stop. You're a hotty with a body. If I was a dude, I'd totally tap that." She said as she wrapped an arm around me, leading me back to the banquet hall.
I chuckled a little at that and calmed slightly.
"So maybe Squall is a prick. But, that doesn't mean he should ruin your night. Don't let him know he's won, you know? Go back in there and have fun." She insisted.
I took a deep breath. She was right. She always was. I needed to take a breather and calm down a bit. I officially hated Squall Leonhart now, and I would not let him have the pleasure of knowing that his remarks affected me. Though throwing a glass at him and storming out was probably a big indicator that he had.
"But..." She began cautiously. "He said he wants to bang me?" She asked.
"Yeah. Well, he said he 'would' bang you, not necessarily that he wanted to." I corrected.
"That bastard." She mumbled.
Quistis marched me back inside and I was filled with a new sense of purpose. Fuck Squall. He was an asshole and not worth my time.
We walked back in and I felt slightly embarrassed and ashamed that so many people had seen me storm out just seconds ago. I avoided eye contact as best I could.
"Rinoa!" Someone called nearby. I looked toward the source and found Nida waving frantically for my attention. I waved back meekly but he gestured for me to come over. God dammit. Quistis and I meandered over slowly. I wanted to avoid this group. But it apparently wasn't possible this evening.
Selphie was there already, beaming a happy smile. I looked at the rest of the group. Zell and Squall were among them. I either wanted to toss myself out a window or tear Squall limb from limb. I couldn't decide which was better.
I avoided eye contact with the two.
"Rin." Nida began. "This is Irvine Kinneas." He motioned to the taller man and he bowed his politely. "Irvine, this is Rinoa Caraway." He extended a hand and I shook it ungraciously.
"Your father's speech tonight was excellent." He said with a smile. He was probably lying, but he hadn't given me any real reason to loathe him so I smiled.
"Thank you. I know he's terribly long winded but only the really astute and educated minds can grasp the cleverness of his speeches." It was an obvious stab at Squall. I imagined him squirming and it made me feel a little better.
"And this is Squall." Nida said. He motioned toward Squall and I looked at him with bitterness. My pleasant smile washed away leaving nothing but curt stoicism. Squall smiled at me.
"Squall, Rinoa." He introduced again. Squall extended his hand. He was pretending nothing had ever happened. Fine. I could play that way.
"Nice to meet you." Squall greeted casually. I locked my hand in his and squeezed... hard.
"You too." I replied as I could feel the bones crack beneath my vice grip. It was a sickening feeling that I relished in. I saw his face contort from the pain and he bit his lip. I released him from my grasp and I smiled pleasantly.
"We're going to be great friends." Squall said with a bright, toothy and completely phony smile.
"I can only hope." I beamed a smile back at him.