"Just tell them! They'll understand! They're your parents, Aaron."
"I know, but…that's just it. They're my parents. What if they're disappointed?"
"Aaron, you're not the first guy to be like this. And you won't be the last. Your parents have friends like you! They won't just throw you out or something."
"Yeah, okay."
"Dad? I have something to tell you."
"Okay, Aaron. You know I'll love you no matter what, right?"
"Uh…yeah. Well, the thing is, I'm not like you."
"Not like me how?"
"Umm…mmhmphbm."
"What?"
"Uh. I'm not like you sexually."
"You mean?"
"Yeah."
"Aaron, that's okay. I thought you probably wouldn't be. I mean, well, you've always been more—"
"Yeah. Well, thanks Dad."
"You better tell you-know-who. Better just do it quick."
"OK."
"Oh! Speak of the devil!"
"So I'm the devil in this little scenario am I?"
"I just meant that Aaron had something to tell you.
"Pop? I'm straight."
"WHAT?!"
"I think you could have handled that better, Draco."
"Yes, well Harry, your son doesn't tell you he's straight everyday, you know. All in all, I think I kept my composure quite well."
"But you didn't have to start sobbing about never having grandchildren or sharing pregnancy stories or—"
"Yes, alright! I calmed down once you pointed out that I'll still have all that, didn't I? Didn't start throwing things, did I?"
"No, Draco. You're right. That went very well. You behaved exceptionally."
"Thank you. Now, we need to start thinking about girls for our little boy. What do you think he finds attractive about them? Not those bobbly breast things? Should we find him someone with big bazooms? Why are you laughing Harry?"
"Draco, sweetie, I think Aaron is perfectly capable of finding a woman on his own. I think he probably really likes those 'bobbly breast things.'"
"Harry. You don't really expect that I would let my child out into the world of dating on his own do you? No. He needs his Papa's input. I'll just find him a nice, quiet girl who has big—"
"Draco. Why don't we just go to bed and work on forgetting about girls and breasts."
"But Harry! I—"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"Well, when you put it like that…"