Diary of a Drug Fiend
OR
"Wanna know how I got these scars ?"
This is my version of how the Joker got his scars.
It's based on research into the way people actually get a " Glasgow smile "
And on people I know and experiences I've had .
I added a bit of THE PATTER , as a Scottish Dialect is called , but not being Scottish I could only add a bit . The Neds ( the tracksuit wearing ,knife wielding boys ) are also a part of the real Glasgow .
I'm SORRY about the underlining .. I don't know WHY that happens!!!
I hope you enjoy this version of the Joker's famous story .
He stood dripping wet on the tile floor , hair hanging in strings around his face . The Joker shook his head wildly, like a mad dog shaking itself dry ,and looked up meeting his own gaze in the mirror .He frowned at his clean face " poor scarred up boooooy " he growled eyeing his own face as if it were a stranger's . The scars on his cheeks puckered as he grimaced , he barely knew the person he was looking at . Still so young and with scars from ear to ear "wanna know how I got these scars ?" He smiled and rolled his eyes smiling as he told it to his scarred reflection.
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The world was spinning around him as he clung to an old wall behind a pub . Bricks and old wooden doors swirled together in his blurred vision . His bones ached and his belly rumbled . He was starving but he couldn't eat .The taste ,the texture of food was repulsive . A wave of nausea crashed over him . He heaved into that dirty alley but nothing came . Just pain and saliva as he convulsed with an effort to remove poisons that couldn't be removed so easily .
"Jack me boy " came a familiar voice .
'Father ?'he thought . He looked over his shoulder and he could see him .Dr. John White ,Professor of Psychology with his bearded face and stern expression ,reading glasses poised on his nose. Jack felt a giggle start bubbling up " hee hoo heee hee hee " He was a Cliché ,a college professor in patched sleeves and old glasses , why did no one else find him funny ?.
' Something funny ?' his father asked coldly
Jack shook his head and put on his best ,most serious expression . His father glared at him seeming not to buy any of it .
Dr. White shook his head staring Jack up and down like a horse on auction' You've been using again haven't you ? You can't handle a few classes without that poison? All you do is learn to blow things up ! I thought science would be something …respectable ' his father smirked, as if happy to tear Jack down once again ' I thought you were bright . Not bright enough to make it without drugs! ' The smell of old scotch filled Jack's nose ' Pathetic , never could hack it could you ? MAYBE if you weren't playing all the time in those acting classes ..you think your so funny" He could see him roll up his sleeves . I'll have to teach you… '
'Oh the good Father , the expert on the human mind ready to beat his son to a pulp …if he can. 'Jack Thought as a smile creased his face ." OKaaay DADDY!" he said lashing out as best his sick body would let him " Ya wanna lesson .. HMM ? Daaaaaddy .. I'll give YOU a lesson " He swung wildly only to be caught by a pair of strong hands " HEE heee hee hoooohoo hmmm " he giggled "
" Now ,now Jack me boy . It's ME Michael , Michael Murphy , yer friend " His rough face was cracked with a devious smile " Seeing things again ? You must be very ,very sick Jack…almost sober " He Laughed quietly. " Don't worry " Michael said Patting Jack on the cheek " it'll pass… if you can stand the withdrawal "
" Mikeeey " Jack whispered taking a long look at the person holding him " great to see ya UH… Mikey " He grinned " I uh .. I know I owe a little MOOLAH but …" He rolled his eyes and tilted his head strangely " I'm uh .. I'm awful sick Mikeeey .. Could I uh .. Could ya fix me up …?"
" Why would I do that Jack ? Why would I ?" Michael Answered
" My uh..my DAD cut off my ummm funds … wants me Back home .. IN uh .. In the States " he peered at Michael out of the corner of his eye " Otherwise I'd a payed ya .. " Michael's jaw set " I could .. I could work it off , I'd be a great member of your team Mikey ! " he grinned " hee hee hee HA ha ha oooo hoo hmmm " he laughed out loud , wildly looking Michael straight in the eye .
" Now there's a proposition Jack , Why don't I take ya back to my place and we'll talk about it .. We'll get ya fixed right up too , how's that Jack ?" He smiled , just a little too wide
" sounds ..great Mikey … I knew you were Ok .. Hee hee hmmm " Jack smiled sleepily
" shall we do em here Michael ?" came a high pitched voice .Michael looked over his shoulder at the group of boys gathered behind him. Most were dressed in bright colored track suits and tilted ball caps , all with fake Burberry or similar tags. They glared at Michael with bright eyes and sweet faces that were marred by scars and stern " manly " looks. The high pitched voice spoke again " Come on Michael … let's git this rich poof . He ain't gonna pay ya ."The voice belonged to a boy who looked all of 14 yrs old . He , like several others, held a locking knife poised in his hand like an expert. Michael frowned, at 23 he was by far the eldest among them. And since he was the guy with the drugs he was also the most powerful.
" Naaaaw" he said " we'll bring em back to me place … see if we can squeeze a little outta him "
The boys grinned and started shouting " let's git the poofy prick " then " AYE , he says he's rooked I dinae think so!" to which another would answer " AYE !"
" Wheesht! " Michael said .angrily to which the boys calmed down considerably "we'll pit oot his pipe" He nodded to the boys " help me carry the guttered basturt home"
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Down through the backstreets of Glasgow they carried him. The air was chilled and at 10:00 o'clock the sun was just going down leaving the last traces of light shining off the Clyde. A few concerned older people looked their way . They simply nodded and smiled .Just carrying a poor drunk friend home ,Ya just carrying a poor drunk friend home.
Jack slipped in and out of consciousness. He could smell the sweet smell of smoke . His father's pipe?
For a moment he thought he was asleep in his own bed . He could hear his mother's voice calling him. His beautiful mother saying " Jack, you're such a good boy ! Look how handsome you are " and holding his face in her hands . He was her treasure . His Father was rarely home in those days but they didn't need him. They were better off without him.
"Wake up ya nugget " came a voice as stinging alcohol hit his face ,to which another quickly answered " Don't waste the Bucky on him ! What's the matter with ya ?" A slap in the face later Jack finally awoke . He shook his head wildly to get rid of the wine .
" sleep well ? " Michael asked
Jack stared, he was in a run down apartment in the schemes, the projects of Glasgow . Michael and 6 tracksuit wearing boys stood around him grinning. These were guys he'd hung out with since his arrival in Glasgow . They were his friends , especially Michael .He was his closest friend there as well as his dealer .They'd laughed with him , learned a bit about bomb making from him and in turn they'd taught him things about knives a college boy never learns " what .. Uh.. What's the problem Mikey ?"
" THe problem ? The problem ? The problem is ya owe me money Jack . I canae let ya get away whi that , now can I ?" The boys looked at each other smiling .
" Ya know I'm good for it Mikey .. I gotta get my Dad to uh.. release my funds … " Jack said eyes narrowed, he could see the door was blocked . He looked up at Michael ,his eyes now wide and innocent , and said "It's … It's not worth it Mikey , He USES money to control me , to control everybody .. … It's just money…"
Michaels face got red and he seemed to lose control shouting " So says the rich boy! Ya have no Idea what it's like to be poor , ya come over here slumming it , were not slumming it Jack we LIVE here!" Michael looked down and smiled sweetly, seeming to regain his composure ." I think yer planning to go back to the states without payin " he said, his lilting voice calm as if he were asking how your day was.
Jack was sweating and shaking ,both from sickness and from fear. He still looked up at Michael trying to reach his friend " I can make it right Mikey , between us , I can ! I can help ya cook …the uuuh the stuff , ya know I uh…I studied chemistry … I can even cut yer costs by…"Jack was kicked in the face before he could say another word . Blood filled his mouth, he prayed all his teeth were still there . One by one the boys joined in kicking him in the stomach ,the back and the legs. He ached , sharp pains shot through him until he as too numb to feel .
" Get off him.. I said get off him ! ' Michael shouted and the boys drew back with disappointed looks . Jack just lay , bloody and sick from withdrawal looking up at his former friend . 'It's just like home ' he thought ' just like home.'
Michael leaned down " take him to the bathroom , let him clean himself up "
They dragged him up and carried him to the bathroom." ya need us to help ya ?" one boy ,Jimmy his name was , asked. Jack shook his head and with that they left him leaning on the sink as he bled down the drain.
Jack looked up and met his own Eyes in the Mirror. Where was the handsome boy his Mother had loved ?
His face had lines he shouldn't have had for many years . His teeth, now red with blood , were yellow and stained ." at least they're there ' He though wryly . Speed had taken it's toll on his body . Once he'd used it to get grades in both the subject his father wanted and the subject he liked ,now he couldn't stop. He could have passed for a man of 30 instead of a guy traveling around Europe after finishing his degree . Not that he'd been traveling for awhile , not since he came to Glasgow more than a year ago.
" of cooourse, there's more to it than Tha-at , isn't there ?" He tilted his head and grinned at his bloody reflection . He cringed , wanting to run from the voice in his head that plagued him. The voice only drugs could shut out ."When MOMMY Died …. Well we were away at college weren't we ? NO one to protect her from DADDY . Soooo instead of facing the old maaaaan ,we ran away… " the reflection said to him grinning it's bloody grin ' it was an accident ' Jack thought " An ACCIDENT ? Of COURSE it was .. How many times did Mommy fall down the stairs ? It was BOUND to kill her sometime .. HEEE HOO Ha ha ha HOO hee he hmm " He saw himself laughing in the mirror and he knew the truth of it .
" Ready Jack.. Fer a little more talkin ?" Jack quickly washed his face and stood staring into his own bloodshot eyes
"Uh ..ya " he said over his shoulder . Things were clearer now ,clearer than they'd been in a long time .
" Yer a good sport Jack , I know ya'll understand … it's just business " Michael said with a smile . Jack's eyes landed on the scar on Michaels cheek . " Jimmy , Boyd , Help him back out here will ya ?"
" It's ok Mikey .. I can walk " Jack told him stepping out of the bathroom .
" Oh , I think yer gonna need a little help Jack me boy .. Take his arms " Everything slowed down. He could see the blade in Michael's hand .He grabbed Jack's face and pried open his mouth . Jack Fought him clamping down but a knife to the throat convinced him to open up " smart boy " Michael said placing an old atm card lengthwise in his mouth . Jack's eyes were wide , staring at the scar on Michael's cheek. The one that made him look like he was smiling just a little to big on one side of his face.
There was a quick slice. Flesh ripping from flesh with an inhuman scream of pain " now ,now Jack .. Stay still or it'll hurt more " Michael said with a pleasant air. " One more me boy " Then it started again , his face tearing itself apart as he struggled against his captors , his friends . Blood filled his mouth again . He was dizzy . " there's a good lad ,now just for good measure .. " with that Michael punched him in the gut . Jack screamed and as he did he felt his face tear . His face ripped open in a parody of a human grin. Every tooth was visible in a scream so wide it made him look like a broken doll .Eye's wide with it's jaw hanging off it's head . Blood came pouring out of Jack's face falling in rivers down his cheeks .
" Now Jack, were even " Michael said laughing .
Jack could hear that voice again , the voice the drugs kept away , it was laughing too " HEEE hooo ha ha ha ha HOO hee hoo ha ha ha" Michael stopped laughing , he just stared going pale before Jack's eyes .The voice just kept on laughing " hee ha HOOO hee hoo heee ha ha ha "
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Bright light shone on the back of his eyelids . He blinked trying to stay asleep .Slowly he became aware of his surroundings. His eyes flew open only to be met by white walls and linoleum , a hospital . What happened ? How had he gotten there ? No sooner had he asked the question than it started coming back to him. His hands shot up to his face . Jagged scars sewn up with thread marred each cheek. He Howled ,it was impossible to tell if he screaming of laughing "AAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEIIIIIIIaaaOOOOOhaaaOOOeeeeeeaa "
" Mr. White ? Mr. White ? " A nurse rushed to his room " Dr? DR! " she called rushing out again
She returned a moment later with The doctor and several nurses . They looked at him and then at the Dr . " Should we sedate him ?" One of them asked.
" Mr. White , Mr. WHITE!… JACK! If you don't calm down I'll have to sedate you " The doctor said sternly .
The patient opened his mouth , he was going to say 'Jack? He's dead " but sharp pains made his hands shoot up to his cheeks .He cradled his tender scars , chuckling through the pain.
" Please , don't Talk Mr. White , I know it's a shock but .." trailed off as he touched the stitches tenderly " it looks like you didn't bust your stitches but PLEASE , try not to move your mouth " The Dr. looked away a moment before adding "your scars are bit ragged now but there is a lot that can be done with lasers to minimize them " The scarred man tittered quietly through the Dr.'s words" but Mr. White that's all we can do , minimize them .They'll be there for life. Scars like yours are unfortunately not uncommon here in Glasgow… in the States however …" The Dr looked at his patient sadly ." I don't know how much you remember about .. Your accident" the Dr. said looking questioningly at the scarred man . The patient tilted his head strangely and shook his head , a frown creasing his new scars " The police will want to question you … once you're able to speak ." The Dr . looked at his hands a moment before continuing " But , since you .. You have no family here I.. I feel I should tell you . Your friend Michael , he didn't make it " The scarred man's eyes went wide with shock " Whoever attacked you , he cut up Michael .. The same as you , but he didn't stop at his face .. He… I'm very sorry Mr. White "
His eyes were wide and he went white as a sheet . His cheeks puffed out and for a moment it looked like he would burst into tears until " OOOOh ha ha HOOO ha ha hee he he HOOOO he he ha ha hEEEEEEE ha ha ha …"
Now it was the Dr.'s turn to go white " Nurse…call the psyche ward . I think .. He's had quite a shock … "
" Dr , Mr. White's Father is a prominent Psychologist, we should inform him of this .. He may want to be personally involved " the nurse said
" He isn't That Dr. White is he ?" The nurse nodded , The Dr shook his head sadly " This will kill him… yes call him. He'll want his son home .."
The scarred man sat giggling ' yes CALL DAAADDY ' he thought ' what a homecoming it'll be …"
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"… and what a homecoming it WAS !" The Joker said to his reflection " That was the night Dr. White and his son died " he crossed himself solemnly " God Rest their souls … HEE hee HOO ha ha ha "
" Wanna know the good Dr.'s last words ?" He nodded at the mirror " Yes ?" He smiled " He looked at Jack's scars , the way they made him look like he was smiling " he said grinning as he traced the scars with his fingertips " and said …you always were a JOKER!" he looked at his reflection as if he expected a reaction " get it ? JOKER ? HOOO .. HOO Ha ha HEEEE hoo Ha ha ha ha ha ……" He laughed and laughed until he couldn't laugh anymore . The Joker tilted his head and looked up questioningly .. " What a TRAGIC story , I wonder if it's TRUE!" He met his own eyes again and added " HOO ha ha HEEE ha ha hoo hee ha ha ha… "