"Max!" A name he hadn't heard in such a long while caused him to shift in his deep unpleasant slumber. He guessed the vague figures would be his parents, crying for him to save himself. A hand of a woman was pulling at him. " Max, save her! Anya! " The woman pleaded. He found himself feeling lost. "I-I can't. I am sorry, Magda." He struggled, a torn feeling of hatred and a sickening guilt running over him.
He felt like it was the first time he had led his powers to act by hatred alone. A feeling of sadness and grief and a need to inflict pain, to those who caused this terrible loss. He had scared her, Magda, the one he had fallen for in the past. And she ran, as if she had seen the monster inside of him. A being that had been chained and had been freed due to the lost of his innocent daughter.
He had loved her but that was a past, and he had been forgotten. The darkness of that night however had remained and once more was reflected in the lonely chamber he had locked himself in.
"Erik?" He hears Raven call him, in order to awaken him, which he does with a feverish gasp. "What is it, Mystique?" He demands her, an order to know if nothing is wrong, that he still wasn't found and alone. She sat on his bedside: "You were having a bad dream again." She whispered it softly glancing towards the end of the bed.
He noticed it being broken, bended in the kind of way that you wouldn't believe it was done by human force.
"You should leave." He urged and he noticed a hint of doubt reflected in her eyes.
"Now!" He said firmly, slightly bending the bed in a way to scare her. She left with a soft pace.
"Call me Erik if you need me to keep you warm." She said it gently, he however shook his head knowing the meaning of those words. "Do not ask this again Mystique." He said and she noticed the hurt with came with his refusal.
"Do you miss him?" She asked glancing back from the door. "Who?" He asked. Yet he knew who she meant, he only wondered why she asked about him.
She closed the door after his reply, sighing deeply. He hadn't eaten for five days. Only drank when she fed him water. She knew following Erik was the right decision. She wondered if Erik decision was the right one for him. Since they came to live here, he hadn't called her by her name. He didn't mind her calling him Erik , but it pained her that he refused to call her by her given name.
Erik buried his face with his hands, trying to calm his mind once more.
"That war is over." He told himself, over and over again. Magda was gone, Anya was gone. He was alone, like he should be.
The small window offered a small bit of light. He didn't have any mirrors and the metal in the room was reduced to only his bed, a lamp and the door handle.
Raven had told him to have as less metal as possible. She was afraid he would use it against him. However he couldn't come with the thought of killing himself.
He still had so much he had to set right. For instance making plans to protect the mutants of humankind. He didn't want them to become the Jews of yet another Holocaust.
He felt a guilt towards his friend Charles, who due to his failure lost his ability to walk. Erik was lost, he knew and he didn't know how to fix this burning rage inside of him.
"What do you know about me."
"Everything!"
It was his favorite torture method. Allowing himself to believe Charles words. And then acting as if that discussion never had been there. Back then Charles did give him the feeling he was understood. Which made the pain of leaving him far more greater than one could ever give him credit for.