Summary: What if Reno had helped Cloud and Aeris infiltrate Corneo's mansion in Wall Market? Re-telling of that infamous scene, complete with Cloud crossdressing, but this time, some assistance from an unlikely source. Rated M for safety - nothing graphic, but hints of yaoi, and definite profanity thanks to Reno. Warnings for cursing, flirty Reno, and crossdressing Cloud.
Usual disclaimer: Don't own FF, wish I did. This is written for fun and not profit.
ser·en·dip·i·ty
noun \ˌser-ən-ˈdi-pə-tē\
Definition: luck that takes the form of finding valuable or pleasant things that are not looked for
Reno cursed his luck, the unseasonably cold weather, the fact that he was down to his last cigarette, and, last but not least, the fact that he'd been ordered to tail Cloud and Aeris to Wall Market. Of all of them, the cocky blond swordsman pissed him off the most. Such attitude from that dude! Mouthin' off to a Turk, guy needs to respect my authority a bit more. Annoyed though he was with Cloud, Reno felt a bit of reluctant admiration toward him because of that cocky attitude, much like his own. Cloud wasn't too bad on the eyes, either, Reno figured. He shrugged his shoulders and grunted, sticking the end of a cigarette in his mouth. As he flicked his lighter to fire up his last cigarette, a gust of wind from the nearby shop door slamming shut blew out the flame on his lighter, and sent the cigarette flying out of his mouth.
"Shit!" Reno squawked, scrambling in an unsuccessful attempt to retrieve the wayward cigarette, stumbled over a rock in the pathway, and crashed straight into Big Bro. The two went tumbling to the ground, limbs entangled.
"Get offa me, fool!" Big Bro snarled, glaring at Reno, whose eyes widened in recognition as he helped the man to his feet. Standing upright, the lean-muscled fighter smoothed back his hair, frowning. "Watch the hair!" he snapped.
"Holy shit, are you Big Bro?" Reno inquired, utterly star-struck. "The Big Bro?" Big Bro was both Reno and Rude's favorite professional wrestler, as many times as he and Reno watched the wrestling matches together on television, there was no way Reno would not recognize the local celebrity. Big Bro was flashy, and had a known penchant for 'dressing up pretty.' Reno noted how the neon lights from the nearby restaurant highlighted flecks of glitter that Big Bro had swept over each cheekbone. Though not in full makeup like he normally would be for a televised wrestling match.
Big Bro smirked, looking at Reno coolly. "That's right. I am the Big Bro. You gotta problem with that?"
Reno shook his head. "Uh...no! I'm a big fan, yo. You look taller on television, though." He didn't mean to be rude, but it was true - Big Bro wasn't all that big. I think Strife might be taller than this dude. Wonder if Big Bro wears high-heeled boots in the ring?
"Pfft!" Big Bro scowled at Reno, waving his hand dismissively. "Whatever. Look, I gotta run. Training at the gym, you know Big Bro's has to be at the top of his game! Be cool!" And with that, Big Bro ran off, heading off toward the gym, weaving his way through the crowd of people milling about the shops and restaurants of Wall Market. Reno grinned after the flashy wrestler as he dusted himself off, straightening out his rumpled suit. He adjusted his goggles atop his head and squinted, trying to spot the bobbing blond head of spiked hair that had been visible just a moment ago; or, the long brunette braid with the pink ribbon. Those were Reno's two visual cues that he'd latched onto in trying to keep the two within his sights at all times.
And now, just like that, Reno had lost sight of his targets in the flash of an eye. "Damn it!" he swore loudly. "Wish Rude was here - " He sighed, trudging over toward one of the greasy spoons he knew of that also had a bar. Not a great one, but booze was booze, and Reno was pissed that he'd lost sight of Cloud and Aeris. Again. He needed to drown his sorrows somehow.
He nodded to the bartender as he took a stool two away from the only other patron there, who was well in his cups already, swaying to and fro on the barstool. Reno asked for his usual; single-malt whiskey, neat – and raised his glass in a salute to the inebriated man. "Cheers, yo. Up your highway," he added, tipping his head back as he downed the shot. Reno raised an eyebrow in surprise as he heard the drunken patron order a cup of coffee - black, with no sugar. Reno smirked - he knew this drill all too well. Guy spend the day at the bar getting hammered, then has to sober up quickly to go home to the wife and kids.
"Best thing to do, is drink lots of water when you're in your cups," Reno advised the man, moving down a few stools while he signaled to the bartender for a second glass of whiskey. "Too much coffee after booze'll give ya a headache."
The bleary-eyed drunkard shook his head as he took a big gulp of coffee. "Uh-uh, I gotta get myself awake," the man replied. "Got a job now, an order to fill." He set the mug of coffee back on the bar and laughed. "A strange one, but hey...a job is a job. Never woulda thought a tough-looking guy like that would want a dress - "
"Huh?" Reno stopped short at that remark and turned to the man, curious. "Wait, what? What tough guy wants a dress? Who, Big Bro?" His mind instantly went to the flashy wrestler he'd just run into - literally run into, at that.
The man laughed in response, shaking his head. "Naw. Not Big Bro. I'm a dressmaker, and I know Big Bro - he ain't into dresses. More into Spandex, glitter, and makeup. Wigs, too. Big Bro is a good customer of the wigmaker here in town."
"So...who wants a dress, then?" Reno asked, his curiosity growing stronger. "Is the Honeybee starting up their drag revue show again?"
"Don't think so...I haven't heard anything about that," the dressmaker replied. His head was starting to clear, and his drunken swaying starting to lessen as the coffee sobered him up. "Was some guy with a big sword, spikey headed blond guy...said he wanted a dress," the man continued, shrugging his shoulders. "Hey, who am I to judge, right? I got my inspiration back, to create something, maybe I should thank the guy."
Cloud. Spikey-headed blond with big sword - that has to be Cloud. But why in the hell does he need a dress? Didn't know he was into that kinda thing...not that there's anything wrong with that. "Uh...yeah. That's a good idea, yo," Reno answered. "So when's he getting the dress?"
The dressmaker frowned thoughtfully. "Well, I told him to give me a day or so, but I'm gonna start working on it soon as I get back. Guess he'll check back in tomorrow sometime. His girlfriend was dragging him off to do more shopping." He finished his coffee and laughed, setting the mug back down on the bar. "She must be really open minded, I guess."
"Girlfriend?" Reno echoed, feeling an odd pang of jealousy upon hearing the word.
"Yeah, well...I think she was his girlfriend, who knows," the man went on. "Pretty little thing, brown hair in a braid, big green eyes - "
Aeris. The Ancient. That's gotta be them...well, I know where they'll pop up tomorrow, if I don't find them before then.
"Hey, good luck with everything," Reno offered as the man got up to leave.
"You too," the dressmaker replied, scratching his head. "Maybe this will be a new direction for me, who knows."
Cloud sighed, trailing along behind Aeris, carrying shopping bags as she bartered for more items to make Cloud "look more like a girl."
"Aren't these cute?" Aeris squealed, holding up a pair of hot pink, high-heeled pumps.
"No," Cloud replied flatly, glaring at Aeris. "Just no. I'm not wearing heels! I don't even know how to walk in heels - "
"Well you can't wear those," Aeris said with a sniff, nodding at Cloud's current footwear, Shinra-issued combat boots. "Those are not very lady-like."
"Aeris," Cloud replied irritably. "I'm not very lady-like. I'm a guy, okay?"
"You'll make a really good girl, though, Cloud," Aeris said, studying his face intently, squeezing his cheeks.
Cloud nearly snarled at the Cetra girl. "Hey! Aeris...please...don't do that!"
"But...you do have really good cheekbones, Cloud," Aerith told him, smiling. "And your coloring! You know, some women would pay a lot of money to have hair as blond as yours."
"Uh...I'm a natural blond," Cloud said dully, blushing, wishing the ground would open up and swallow him whole. He thought of Tifa, stuck at the Corneo's mansion, the old lech leering at her, trying to put his hands on her - he ground his teeth at the very thought. He had to do something, anything, to get Tifa out of there.
"I know, that's what I'm saying!" Aeris fairly gushed over Cloud, preening over him, which made him feel even more uncomfortable and self-conscious. "Oh, don't look at me like that, Cloud. This is the only way we can sneak you in there, they don't let men in to see Don Corneo."
"Are you sure, Aeris?" Cloud said dubiously. He was starting to feel that Aeris was enjoying this makeover nonsense a bit too much. Still, if impersonating a woman was the only way Cloud could get inside to rescue Tifa, he was willing to suffer any embarrassment.
"I'm really glad Barret isn't here to see this," Cloud muttered under his breath. Sighing with resignation, he turned to Aeris and nodded. "All right. So what's our next stop?"
"We really need to get you some suitable shoes, Cloud," Aeris said authoritatively. "Those boots are just not going to work."
"Fine," Cloud replied, a bit sourly, rolling his eyes. "You know...I've been cooperative about the dress, Aeris. I can't walk in high heels though."
"You're only saying that because you've never tried walking in them, I bet," Aeris told Cloud, linking her arm in his. "Come on! Let's see if we can find a pair with a lower hell. You know...a stiletto can double as a weapon," Aeris went on, selecting a pair of two-inch black heel, fashioned from black leather, with a heel made of solid silver. "See this?" Aeris asked, bringing the shoe up and down in a stabbing manner. "You could take someone's eye out with that."
"Oh, cool," Cloud said, brightening, then backed up a step from Aeris. Wait. Sweet and innocent flower girl from the slums was showing him how to gouge someone's eye out using a shoe?
"Remind me never to get on your bad side, Aeris," Cloud commented, as he stooped down to unlace his boots. "Okay...I'll try these on for size. But you'll have to show me how to walk in them." I can't believe I let her talk me into this...
Reno made his way out of the bar after his third whiskey, after chatting up some of the locals and merchants who passed through, asking everyone he met if they'd seen anyone who fit Cloud or Aeris' description. Most shrugged their shoulders indifferently, answering in the negative - save for one, who 'thought' they might have seen someone matching that description in Merchant's Row.
"I checked around there before, but worth another look I guess," Reno declared. "Thanks, man!" He clapped his informant on the back, slipped him a twenty-gil note for his troubles - not necessary, really, but the Turks as a whole never hesitated to grease a few palms to get the information they needed. Reno was smart, he knew that keeping a good relationship with local informants and snitches could always come in handy someday.
He set out again amidst the sea of colorful tents and booths; the market was really bustling and busy today, and it was all too easy to lose sight of someone just as Reno had done. This time, Reno wasn't about to let them give him the slip so easily, if he caught up with them.
At the moment, Cloud was trying on his fourth pair of high heeled stilettos, and becoming even more irritated and crabby. "Look, these shoes just aren't made in my size," Cloud snapped as Aeris tried to force an ill-fitting shoe onto his sore foot. "The hell with this! I'll just go in there barefoot."
Aeris looked at Cloud's feet very doubtfully. They were anything but dainty, and despite Cloud not being overly tall in stature, his shoe size was enormous. "You're right, Cloud," she finally said, seeming to admit defeat as she sat back, scanning the stack of shoes that were for sale, looking for the largest size possible. "I didn't realize how big your feet were!" she added, face reddening, remembering the old joke her mother had told her about the size of a man's feet and what it meant. Was it just an old wives' tale? Aeris suddenly found herself very curious.
"Earth to Aeris, hello!" Cloud said impatiently. "What's wrong? It's like you went off into your own little world for a minute."
"Sorry!" Aeris exclaimed, flushing, gathering up her skirts as she stood. "I...do that a lot...oh, Cloud, wait! Here!" The Cetra had spotted one last pair of heels, the largest women's size the shoe merchant carried. "Try these! Maybe these are the ones that fit!"
"Ugh," Cloud grunted, disgusted. He sat back down on the small stool, kicking his boots off once again. "But this is the last pair I am trying, if these don't fit, I am going to the mercantile and buying a pair of flip flops. I'm starting to feel like a princess in a bad fairy tale," he muttered, complaining.
Aeris smiled, kneeling in front of Cloud with the two shoes held out for him. They were a deep royal blue pump, with a four-inch silver stiletto heel. "These are pretty high, but maybe they'll be okay if they fit you just right!" Aeris said, brightly and optimistically. Cloud grumbled as he slipped a foot into each shoe, flexing his toes around inside.
"Well...these are pretty comfortable," Cloud admitted, grabbing onto Aeris's arm as she helped him to stand. "Let's see if I can walk in them." Cloud teetered a bit as he tried to gain his balance, listening to Aeris who was advising him how to walk.
"You have to shift your center of gravity - no, your weight goes on the balls of your feet, like this - " Aeris demonstrated for Cloud, who was weaving back and forth, flapping his arms.
"Shit!" Cloud blurted, pitching backwards, expecting to hit the hard ground with a thud. He stiffened in surprised as he felt strong arms wrap around him from behind. "What the - " Cloud batted at the arms of whoever it was, feeling utterly pissed off and embarrassed. He stood up shakily and spun around to look into the eyes of -
"Reno?" Cloud said in disbelief. "You. What are you doing, following us?" he asked dumbly.
Reno smirked at Cloud, ignoring the question. "Well, fancy meeting you here, Cloud. Nah, I was just poking around, doin' some shopping."
"Bullshit," Cloud snapped. "You were following us. You've been following us since you tried killing Aeris in the church!" Despite feeling unsteady on his feet, Cloud protectively shoved Aeris behind him, who peered around him curiously. "Leave us alone, or I'll kill you."
"Whoa, wait a second..." Reno protested, putting up his hands in a gesture of mock-surrender. "I didn't try killing nobody!" Reno's face reddened, remembering the crushed yellow and white flowers in the church. "Oh...I'm sorry about the flowers back there, yo," he told Aeris, attempting a smile. Aeris smiled back at Reno, but Cloud was staring daggers at him.
"You fucking shot at us!" Cloud retorted angrily. He leaned forward toward Reno, meaning to do so in a threatening manner, but instead fell right into the man.
Reno caught him and laughed, arms coming up around the irate blond to help steady him again, and he gave Cloud a smirk. His breath hitched slightly as he felt those muscles flexing and tensing against him, until Cloud pushed him off. "Hold on, yo. I didn't shoot at you. Nor did I give orders to shoot. Some of those jarheads we got are fucking trigger happy. Wasn't my idea, Tseng wants the Ancient brought back alive."
"Her name is Aeris, asshole," Cloud snapped defensively. "She has a name."
"Thank you, Cloud," Aeris whispered, squeezing his forearm. She too glared at Reno. "That's right. My name is Aeris, and I am not some specimen to be kept under glass."
"No...I know you're not," Reno said quietly. The truth was, Reno honestly didn't know what Hojo wanted with Aeris. To him she was just a girl, allegedly the last of her kind. She hadn't, as yet, demonstrated any special powers or anything like that. The Turk shrugged his shoulders. "Look, I don't know why the Science Division wants you anyway. But Tseng – he told me to make sure you don't get hurt. I know ya got no reason to believe me, so whatever. That's how it is, though."
Cloud and Aeris looked at each other, then to Reno. "You don't actually believe him…do you, Aeris?" Cloud asked her. Barret said not to trust the Shinra…then again, Barret doesn't seem the type to trust anyone, period.
Aeris shrugged her shoulders. "I've heard that the Turks are shady," she admitted. "But, until Reno gives me a reason not to believe him…well, everybody deserves a chance, right?"
"I don't believe you, Aeris," Cloud said, shaking his head. "He tried to kill us, and you're going to trust him?"
"He was trying to catch us," Aeris corrected Cloud, still eyeing Reno a bit warily. She would give him the benefit of the doubt – for now. Aeris wasn't as clueless or naïve as some people thought she was; the girl grew up in the slums, after all.
Cloud continued to glare at Reno; he was still swaying to and fro in the stilettos, and was about to fall over. He put a hand up to steady himself, which unintentionally clamped down upon Reno's arm. Cloud snatched his hand away quickly. He still didn't trust Reno; hell, Cloud wasn't even sure if he trusted Barret. There was so much Cloud didn't know. He'd fallen in with AVALANCHE upon arriving in Midgar, though his memory of how – or when - that happened was a bit fuzzy.
"I ain't gonna let you fall," Reno said firmly, offering Cloud his hand. The swordsman stared at Reno suspiciously and hesitantly, and then grasped the hand firmly, allowing himself to trust only that much – that Reno would not let him fall.
"So, what's the occasion, for the pretty shoes?" Reno remarked with a chuckle, nodding toward the stiletto heels, which Cloud pulled off in a hurry, rolling his eyes.
"Don't ask," Cloud muttered, putting the shoes back. "I'm not getting them, anyway. They're…not my style." Cloud smiled slightly, the absurdity of the situation was starting to amuse him a bit, if only slightly.
Aeris knitted her brows together, her wheels turning. "Well, we'll just have to think of something else, Cloud. Maybe you'll just have to wear your boots with the dress – "
"Aeris. Enough," Cloud hissed at her to stay quiet, not knowing that Reno had already pieced that bit of information together. It was bad enough Reno was following them, he didn't want Aeris tipping off the Turks as to their next move.
"Look…I'm not sure what's going on here, but maybe I can help?" Reno offered, as Cloud looked at him in utter disbelief.
"Why would you want to help us?" Cloud retorted immediately, ever on the defensive. Barret's voice echoed in Cloud's head. No-good Shinra, no-good Turks, don't trust none of them, Cloud!
"Because maybe I'm in a good mood today, all right?" Reno snapped. He sighed, shaking his head as Cloud quickly put his boots back on. "Are you always this fucking pleasant, yo?"
"Reno…try to understand," Cloud said evenly, staring Reno straight on. "You know who I am, and Shinra and the Turks are after me…how do I know you won't go back on your word and try to kill me and Aeris?" The Turk blinked twice; Cloud's eyes seemed full of blue-green fire, and he remembered what had struck him back in the church, when he first ran into Cloud and Aeris.
Mako eyes. And a Shinra uniform, but…I just figured he stole it somewhere. What's the connection, though? He's been Mako infused, I'm sure of it , but how? He never made it into SOLDIER, far as I know. Reno had gone over the file on Cloud after he'd gone back to Headquarters: the cadet had been declared KIA, along with Zack, though neither body had ever been recovered when the Turks went back for the retrieval operation. Something wasn't adding up, and Cloud just seemed off. If this even was Cloud – Reno hadn't completely ruled out the possibility that this could be an impostor.
But something, some instinct told Reno that wasn't the case. "I know it don't mean much seeing as you don't trust anything Shinra, but I give you my word, Cloud," Reno said solemnly. He stepped forward, closer, his face mere inches from Cloud's.
"I mean it. Right now, my only orders are to tail ya. That's all…nothing else," Reno went on.
"That's all?" Cloud echoed, frowning. He folded his arms over his chest, weighing this. "I don't know…" Cloud turned as Aeris laid a hand on his arm, giving him her calm smile.
"Cloud…it'll be all right," Aeris said firmly. "Well, Reno…you'll find out sooner or later since you're tailing us, so…I guess I'll fill you in. We're trying to get into Don Corneo's mansion, Cloud's friend is there and we're trying to rescue her."
"Corneo?" The lines of Reno's face grew hard, lips drawn into a thin line as he frowned. "Don't like the guy. Never did. He hurt someone close to me." That was all Reno would offer at the moment, or possibly at all. There was no love lost between Reno of the Turks and Don Corneo; as things stood, President Shinra turned a blind eye to Corneo's rather unsavory activities because he was a decent informant. Still, Reno's personal history with the man was not a good one, and going against the man didn't bother his conscience one bit.
Reno put one arm around Cloud's shoulders, and another around Aeris's.
"Listen…I don't know why you'd want to go in there, voluntarily, but I get that you wanna get your friend out, Cloud," Reno said in a low tone. "It's true, though…Don don't allow men in there, just women, so…you take care of that bit, and I'll find a way to get you in. Okay?"
Cloud stared at Reno in disbelief, then glanced over at Aeris, her face full of hope. He didn't want to take that away from her, and he wanted to feel like he could trust Reno, but…there were so many unknowns.
Finally, after a few moments, Cloud nodded. "Okay. You can help us, I guess," he said, relenting. Cloud wasn't entirely sure this was the best idea, but their options were limited, and the more time they wasted around Wall Market meant that Tifa might be getting in deeper and deeper, and was possibly in danger.
"Good," Reno replied. "Now tell me what's going on."
A/N: Gift fic for redheadturkey - HAPPY BIRTHDAY my dear! 3
Reno keeps doing this to me...I write something intending it to be a one-shot, and then...it ends up requiring at least one more chapter. :) But not to worry, chapter two will come very soon! I hope you enjoyed this one so far! xoxoxo