Disclaimer: I really don't see why any of you need to be told I do not own Yu Gi Oh, or any of the rights associated with it—I only ask you respect the characters I personally create within this fic, and, naturally, the plot I created (whimsically created or no).
AN: Ahh! A fanfic of YGO! Does this make me a 'serious fan'? Oo Probably not. I mean, I might 'own' some of the cards, but I've never actually played the game, and what self-respecting 'fan' hasn't done THAT? (Plus…I'm not sure I even know all of the millennium items, or their uses…like—what the heck IS the puzzle for, aside from the baggage it comes with? Do not answer that, I'm sure I'll find out one day on my own and feel all smart and important because of it. :P)
All right, this is definitely AU—why? Because they're all 17, but they know pretty much everything they should know (that I know) at the end of the series. (And…um…Yugi has the God cards. Because he's a dirty cheat.) Now, I've only (faithfully) watched the first season of Yugioh(read, actually) before the duel cards…Duelist Kingdom, and the first half of the weird Atlantian dragon saga (plus the first movie…) other than that, all I know are a few scattered episodes, some summaries (a few mangas) and lots of hearsay (fanfics and the ilk). So no doubt there will be errors, I'm not even going to try to do it otherwise, though…it's just going to be magically AU—any problems arising will likely be the product of my crazed mind. ;)
Right then, I don't even know that much about Kisara (although, admittedly, the right music videos can do wonders for revealing things…), but here I am! Although, really, I kind of wanted to do a SK/OC fic already, I just…er…shy away from OCs. However, heheh this way I can make one and get away with pretending she's 'fannon' Nya ha ha!
VV Of course, I just revealed my evil plot, so now it's ruined. Darn. Oh well, I've started this, and devoted all of five minutes to it, so I suppose there's no going back…let's get this show on the road!
Ah-hem.
Wouldn't you know, the title was inspired by a very dark poem called 'Do you think I'm pretty now?' … I considered using the name, but I decided this fit better—plus, up until two seconds ago, I could claim it as mine…
DANG. I really shouldn't ramble, should I? Then, I'm sure you all secretly get perverse pleasure out of seeing this poor bunny author make a fool out of herself, don't you. DON'TCHA? Well, go ahead! Laugh! I'll just laugh maniacally in reply! AH-hah! Ah--…
Right.
Pixie stick, anyone.
I actually prefer the Japanese names to the English ones, but I find a lot of people have only watched the series, and I hate looking like a typical 'Oh, kawaii! Arigatou, O'tou-san!' fangirl…/cough/
I'll probably use some sort of hybrid that will completely defeat my excuse of not wanting to confuse anyone! This means, BTW, that you'll never see the above line in the story. Pretend it was translated from Japanese originally (that'll cover some grammatical mistakes) it's be a terrible translation if half of the words were still Japanese.
Do you love me now?
Chapter 1: The perfectly un-perfect girl
Screen Name: PUPgirl
Password: ------
Name: Kitsune Miahorene
Age: 17
Gender: Female
Home: Domino City, Japan
About Me: Hi. If you've read the rest of this silly sign-up sheet, you've already gathered that my name is Kitsune Miahorene, age 17, currently residing in Domino City—and yes, I am a girl. If you read the bio, and somehow hadn't devised these facts, I worry for you. You may wonder what my screen name means, and those of you that fancy yourselves as clever have probably already made several wrong guesses, and are currently clinging smugly to an inventive and brilliantly wrong answer. Let me save you from your undeserved senses of accomplishment. It means nothing.
Actually, that was a lie. However, I thought it would be nice to let some of the cleverer of you have a moment of triumph before your confidence was shattered—you do try so hard to look smart, after all.
What it really means is an old nickname an even older friend gave me 'The perfectly un-perfect girl' what that means is really none of your business, but I suppose I'll have to say anyway, and make a pointless attempt to stave off your wildly erroneous assumptions. Actually, all it means is that I'm a perfectly normal girl in every way, once you get to know me…if your definition of normal fits mine. I have no extraordinary abilities or attributes, I have no mysterious past, and I can't duel to save my life…actually, maybe I could do that. Nevertheless, that's what makes me so normal—I've nothing exceedingly bad about me, either. I suppose you could call me the perfectly ordinary girl, too.
Yeah, PUP is not the most accurate abbreviation, but we both already know the lame insults you'd throw at me if I were PUGirl (or Pugirl, or PUgirl)
So then. About me.
I have shoulder-blade length droll brown hair, your average (for my lineage) bluish eyes, something along the shade of a healthy tan, and zero curves. I mean, well, I'm 17, so I guess that's a bit of a misnomer—I have a couple curves, but lets just say I never managed to win any pageants throughout my high school life. With my laidback hobbies, I won't be winning any martial arts or weightlifting competitions, either…although I'm not exactly out of shape.
So that's my vague and longwinded way of saying my looks are as average as my abilities. As for my intelligence…well, now I have a thesaurus and an automated spell-checker, and feel like making you all feel insecure and inferior, but I'm afraid I'm no genius any more than I am Miss Japan, or the Queen of duels. Don't like it, don't read this. Signing up for a date site out of boredom isn't exactly the greatest show of intellect anyway, is it?
So then. My interests. That would be…Duel Monsters, like every other sane person in Japan. Who doesn't like to watch giant holographic monsters tear each other limb from limb? It's like WWE, but in a twisted sort of way, more real.
Although, I don't watch just any duels, I only watch the top competitors—and I only bother to watch most of those because all of the top competitors are—odd as this will sound to all of you—fighting each other all of the time. My favorite card, by far, is the Blue Eyes White Dragon (I'll spare your poor taxed minds an abbreviation this time.) Three guesses whom my favorite duelist to watch is…the first three don't count.
An interesting bit of trivia that will get you DM geeks out buying new keyboards is that I go to school with almost all of the top competitors. As, however, they are far from friends with every single person attending their high school (amazingly, the richest CEO in the world still feels the need to get a diploma), I am most definitely not their friend. Therefore, I get to watch them do very normal things in very normal ways (except for the freaks out of them, that do everything in the freakish way) but if they've ever heard my name, they forgot it five seconds later. Two, if we're talking about the jerk-face business boy.
However, you know what? I like it that way. I rather hate myself when I fall into fits of fangirlism, and that happens much too often around them. I shudder to think what would happen if one of them remembered my name even once during a science project.
I'd tell you my past, but it's so unremarkable, I can't even remember it half of the time. If you're still reading this, you're either a mad stalker, a determined little bugger, or both. In any case, I'm afraid you've reached the end of this particular information highway.
What's the bigger shame here? The fact that you just threw away 20 minutes of your time in a hopeless and pathetic attempt to find the partner of your dreams, or the fact that I wasted 10 minutes wasting your time?
"And all this time, I was naïve enough to think you wanted friends." The voice of her cousin cut in dryly as she hit 'submit'.
"Anyone pathetic enough to use the internet in the hopes of finding their mate deserves to find a much longer and pointless bio." She said flatly, stretching and getting up from her chair.
"Clearly, watching a certain duelist has had a negative effect on you." He smirked. "Perhaps its better I just throw away these tickets to the tournament."
"Try it and see what happens to you." She snorted, snatching one of the blue and yellow slips of paper her cousin held.
"That sounds like a worthy challenge."
"Choke and die on your ticket, Kazuki."
"Such violence…" He grinned. "What's up with you today? You're dream boy lose a duel?"
"He never loses." She said, narrowing her eyes.
"You admit he is your dream boy!" Kazuki said triumphantly, gray eyes sparkling with mischief.
"I admit you call him that, nothing more."
He snorted. "Have you completely lost your mind, or only your memory of me?"
"You can't be implying you don't call him that." She said, rolling her eyes.
He gave her a devilish grin. "You know what I mean!"
"No, I don't."
"Yes, you do."
"No, I…" She paused, and rubbed her temples wearily. "Kazuki, I am going to punch you."
"Go ahead, you hit like a girl."
She gave him a glare that would wither bamboo, and shoved her way past him with her shoulder, headed outside.
"Your welcome for the tickets!" He called wryly after her.
"We'll call it even!" She countered. "You can pay me back later!"
"Yeah, with a rock to the head!"
She gave a snort of amusement, and slammed the door behind her. Kazuki was not really her cousin, he was her foster brother…or…whatever you call those. Whatever happened to her original family she did not know, and did not really care. A family adopted her as little more than an infant, and she had no qualms about calling her foster parents her parents. She called Kazuki her cousin because he said he would rather have a cousin than a sister.
This, of course, was proclaimed when he was about seven. She would never let him live it down, though…what else were younger 'sisters' for.
She grinned slightly as she approached the public duel hall that always held the smaller tournaments. This tournament was tiny—barely a step up from exhibition matches. Nevertheless, they would be there anyway, and according to schedule, they would duel each other, too.
She was almost certain to see the powerful and magnificent card she so coveted. She was also certain to see at least one of those annoying 'God' cards that always seemed to pop up and destroy her beloved card, too. That was, however, beside the point.
Smiling slightly to herself and leaning back in the seat her 'cousin' had purchased her, she closed her eyes as the less interesting battles between less accomplished duelists played out pointlessly. Secretly, she wondered to herself just how her dream card might feel in her hands—as her hand in a duel. The slick lamination and cool touch of the card on her dry skin, the hot breeze generated by the 'summoning' of the holographic creature…that look of mingled awe and terror on her opponent's face as he realized how hopeless his situation truly was…
She grinned to herself. Oh yes, dueling would be so much more fun if she had one of those. It was a shame the only ones in possession of the card would rather destroy it than give it away. Scratch that thought, they would rather destroy it and die, than share the wealth. Jerk-offs.
Maybe one day she could challenge Mr. I-own-three-of-the-four-cards-in-existence-and-shredded-the-fourth to a duel, and win one fair-and-square. She gave a loud snort that elicited irritated noises from the people bothering to watch the duel. As if I could win a duel against the most accomplished duelist in the world! I might as well give up my mighty all-commons deck right now, than challenge him to a duel with an ante like that! She smirked lightly. Although I would cherish the outraged look on his face that would undoubtedly appear if I did ever demand a duel. Right up until it morphed into that cocky look of self-assured arrogance he always gets on his face the moment he knows he has a duel beat.
"I can't believe dis!" A voice scattered her thoughts as a small group of people approached the empty benches next to her. "Do dey know who're dey're dealin with? Just cause I ain't duelin dis time!"
"I'm pretty sure all they care about is the fact that you managed to avoid paying entrance fee." Another voice said, from the same group.
"It's not like we snuck in!" A girl chimed, sounding almost worried. "We were given perfectly valid guest passes!"
As the group neared, Kitsune noticed it was a group of four people, one girl and three guys of what looked like varying ages. She flung her backpack into the seat next to her as the one with an accent—a familiar looking blonde—sat in it, causing him to yell in indignation, and stand up. This, of course, caused all sorts of shushing, but neither Kitsune, nor the group cared.
"That seat is taken." Kitsune said simply.
"Ya coulda just said so!"
"Like you would listen." She snorted.
"For yer information, I would!" The blonde growled, waving his fist at her.
"Yeah. And I'm psychic, so I would know this." She sneered sarcastically.
"Ya? You insultin' me?" The blonde asked, voice raised—much to the dismay of those still foolish enough to try to watch the pointless duel unfolding below. "Well come on! I'll duel ya right now!"
She rolled her eyes. "No."
The blonde blinked, taken aback. "Whaddaya mean, 'no'? Ya can't duel or somethin'?"
"I can duel!" She said sourly. It is not exactly a lie…I do know how to duel, and I own cards…I just don't duel well, or own a duel disk!
"Then what are ya? Coward?" The male insisted, and then stuck out his tongue in a very childish manner. "Coward! Coward! Ya're afraid ta duel me!"
"Joey! Quit it!" The girl said in a shushing manner, giving the increasingly agitated crowd an apologetic smile.
Kitsune frowned slightly at the blonde man now apologizing to the girl. Wait a minute…that stupid accent…it has to be him. Great. Good thing I turned him down.
"You're that one horrible duelist, aren't you?" She snorted teasingly, now resolute in her decision not to duel him. Tormenting people was so much easier when they did not know they were better than you in what you were poking at them about.
"I ain't horrible!" Joey yelled, spinning on her. "I'll prove it right now! Come on! You an me!"
"Would be a waste of my time." She said with a private smirk.
"Who d'ya think ya are?" The blonde growled, a muscle in his jaw working furiously. It was quite fun to rile people up when you knew they could not do anything to you.
"Judging by what I saw watching the Duelist Kingdom and Battle City tournaments on DVD, a better duelist than you." She smirked crossing her arms and deliberately watching the boring duel instead of the furious 'duelist' next to her—oh yes; she could definitely talk the talk. It was a shame she just could not get the knack of the 'walk'.
"Joey, don't listen to her!" The girl, who Kitsune now recognized as part of the squad of cheering fangirls that followed the more accomplished duelists around, said quickly, grabbing the boy's shoulder. "What does she know about dueling? We know you duel with your heart, and that is what matters!"
She could have made a thousand quips, and reduced the situation to a quip-war that the tournament security already approaching them would end before she could get under his skin. That would make her look like the instigator, and get her in trouble, though, so she just did what she did best. She waited until the partially-mellowed blonde threw her a glower, and flashed him a smarmy, supremely confident smile, that was more efficient at getting her point across than a hundred 'too bad all the 'heartless' duelists always beat you'-ish comments.
The result was immediate, and in a sick sort of way, immensely satisfying. The blonde, to put it in small and simple words, snapped. She had not realized just how much his yelling (mostly words a boy his age should not repeat) would echo across the duel hall, and how many faces would turn up to see him clutching a poor helpless girl's collar, and shaking her like a rag doll. Even the pathetic 'duelists' in the center took a break from their mockery of a duel to watch the spectacle.
Funny, though she was starting to feel lightheaded, she did not really see how the moment resembled that of a rag doll. Maybe if she saw it third person it would look like that. As it was, she simply grinned wickedly at the way the boy's friends were trying to calm him.
"What's going on here?" Clearly, the security had arrived before they succeeded.
"This boy attacked me when I said the seat next to me was taken by my cousin." She said innocently as the blonde jumped away from her and made wild excuses.
"She was provokin' me an not duelin to settle it!" He accused, pointing at her.
The men that had gathered frowned at him a moment, then at her innocent smile, and back again. After a moment, while Joey continued to ramble accusations, and she continued to smile her best innocent smile, they exchanged weary glances.
--
"I'll kill you!" She fumed, pointing threateningly at the blonde next to her. "Scratch that, Kazuki bought those tickets, so he can kill you! I'll wait until we're both reborn, and make sure to be born near you so I can suffocate you with the receiving blanket!"
"What, ya wanna be my sista now?" The blonde growled, leaning toward her in what he probably felt was an intimidating way.
"Don't be stupid—hard as I'm sure that is for you!" She snarled. "I don't have to be in your family to be born near you! That's why there are baby rooms in hospitals!"
"So babies can kill each other?" He sounded genuinely confused.
"No, moron, so parent like mine can show off their babies to unfortunate parents with babies like you." She sneered.
"Now ya're insultin me!"
"And what was I doing before, singing limericks?"
"Look at that, the mutt has finally found someone of his intelligence level." That coldly arrogant and somewhat annoying voice could only be the self-possessed duelist that owned the only three card she wanted—the Blue eyes, the Blue eyes, and, yes, the Blue eyes. (True, she might have needed to vary her goals a little.)
"Da tournament started a half hour ago!" Joey shot back, smirking smugly. "Dey don't let latecomers in!"
The man, who happened to be the student-turned-businessman, Seto Kaiba, gave a cool, disinterested sneer. "That depends entirely on the pedigree of the duelist arriving. Clearly, yours was not good enough. But I could have told you that without you having to suffer the humiliation of rejection"
"I didn' enter the tournament, stupid!" Joey yelled after him.
"Stupid. Oh yes, that's an original insult." Kitsune snorted.
She sighed softly as the man flashed an ID card and the bouncer-esque man allowed him into the duelists' area, to wait his turn to duel. Assuming things went on schedule, as his first duel—with a reasonably accomplished duelist—would be next, meaning in about five minutes.
She shook her head mournfully. And I was so looking forward to seeing the Blue eyes!
Joey shook his head and shrugged, apparently thinking something similar—although probably about his friend in the tournament. "I hope Yug whups his sorry deck!"
That was right…she was going to miss the duel—all because of him! She gave an irritated growl, and closed the distance between them quickly as she reached over to strangle him. "It's your fault I'm missing the Blue eyes fight! All yours!"
"Hah!" The blonde barked, grabbing her wrists and trying to pry her fingers off him. "I'll tell ya what happens! Yug's God cards 'Obliterate' Kaiba's weak dragons!"
"Obliterate isn't their attack, you blonde bimbo!" She snarled, tightening her grip.
"Um…Kitsune?" The voice of her 'cousin' caused her to jump in surprise, and turn with a sheepish grin toward his disapproving frown.
"Would you believe 'He started it'?"
CH END
AN: Heh, she's a bit of a jerk, isn't she? Alternatively, is it she's just feisty:P I figure, since she's supposed to be nothing like Kisara (that's the beauty of the plan) she's got to have a bit of an attitude—since Kisara was so sweet and innocent (and don't get me wrong, I LOVE that about her)
Don't worry, though, Kitsune'll straighten out, she's not as bad as she looks…: P trust me.
Whoa, 12 pages. Normally it's ten, but the ANs take up like two pages, so I guess that fits. :P
Completed on: 4/10/06 12:17:03 AM
-Yusagi Sombermoon