At the back of my mind
Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade.
Note: In this story I've tried to express my feelings towards the way Tyson keeps on fooling around. I believe that he isn't that much of a child as he tries to act like. Everyone can be serious too. You might not like it. It could seem really out of character, but do me the favour and read it. I'd love to read a review with your point of view.
Max's hair is blond. Everywhere he goes people naturally stare at him. Japanese people just don't have blond hair so he stands out like a three meter high man. I once saw a photo of his school friends and him. He was grinning from ear to ear; just another thing which makes him stand out. All of his friends have black or brown hair. It seems strange to me, how he can keep that calm and cheerful with everyone staring at him. I couldn't do that. I'd snap at them and tell them to mind their own business.
Ray's got long hair - I mean; really long. At least it is black, unlike Max's, but he still gets looked at, since he's got the most scaring yellow cat-like eyes. If I say scaring, that means something. I usually don't think anything is creepy. Still; those eyes make me uncomfortable, even if I don't say that aloud.
Then there is Kenny. His red hair doesn't seem too Japanese either. Though he is really little for his age, and doesn't get stared at that much. I think he will grow a lot if he gets older. Both of his parents are way taller than him. I have heard that there are people who just start growing very late.
I, myself tend to keep away from people. I don't like to get stared at, nor do I like to get spoken to. I always try to stay somewhere in the dark and watch my friends. It's not that I'm a depressed unsocial bastard; it's just that I like watching my team interact. If they laugh something inside of me joins in, if they cry I try to think of a way to make them feel better again, even if that consists of making them train a lot – which, I must say; does help sometimes. It keeps them occupied until they forget their problems.
Tyson is almost invisible. Don't laugh; it's true. His natural appearance is totally Japanese-like. With his dark blue hair he doesn't stand out at all. Sometimes that hair almost seems black, it's so dark. His eyes aren't in any way amazing either. Blue blends in. I learned that in the hard way. Then there is his way of walking. It doesn't stick out of the masses. Max, for instance, jumps a lot. Ray walks silent and careful. Kenny is extremely clumsy. But Tyson doesn't really do those things.
What Tyson does is joking. He does it day and night - All the time you can hear him telling one of his idiotic jokes, which only make Max laugh. Ray sometimes likes them too, but Kenny and I aren't into those. We just listen, if we do, that is. Sometimes I just let them wash over me, like a great wave. When that happens I notice how funny his voice can sound. It's getting loud and all of the sudden he is whispering, and then he would laugh quietly and squeal in surprise and then giggle. If you listen a lot, you realise that there is a pattern. He never breaks that patter. It seemed almost impossible to me when I first noticed it, but after a while I knew it made sense.
Tyson wants attention. He seeks for it. He needs it that much, that he is actually making himself look like a fool, just for the fun of others. But it isn't really like him. It doesn't come naturally like with Max. He tried desperately to joke and smile, even if it needs all his concentration to keep it up. He's hiding his true self beneath that shiny happy mask.
Once someone told me that it's better to laugh, if you want to make friends, than to actually talk seriously. That person was right. And Tyson knows that. And I know it. And he knows that I know it. But he doesn't know that I know he knows that I know.
"Kaaaaaai, did you know that Ray's lost his brush???" Tyson asked and leaned in close to me. I baked away instinctively. "You haven't seen it have youuuuu?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. I glared at him and pushed him back to his own seat.
"No, I don't brush my hair." I stated calmly. He tilted his head.
"Are you sureeee?" Before I could do anything his hands were on my hair.
"Tyson get the fuck away." I hissed angrily and pushed him away again. For a moment he only stared at me. It was a weird feeling, almost as though he had finally shown his real self to me. The Tyson nobody saw.
"It's silky." He stated emotionless. Suddenly he blinked and laughed loudly. "So you did steal Ray's brush, huh, bud?!" Without realising what I actually did, I had grabbed him on his collar and gritted my teeth.
"Stop faking. I can't stand it." I whispered, so that nobody else would hear it. I wasn't sure the others were listening anyway. The plane was pretty loud and Max, Ray and Kenny were a few seats away.
"Fuck you." He snapped back. I gasped and let him go.
"Well; fuck you right back." I said when I recovered from my shock.
"That's cute." He groaned sarcastically. "I will once we get off this plane."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Doing what your leader says aren't you?"
"Exactly." He stared at me. "You know what? You've got evil eyes."
"Thanks." I growled. "And you've got the most amazing shirt."
"I bought it just for you."
"That's nice."
"I could buy you one too if you want."
"You could."
"I could."
"Don't do it."
"Alright." And again he stared at me. I felt uncomfortable. "I should have taken a bomb with me."
"Oh yeah? And why's that?"
"It's statistically impossible that a plain's got two bombs on board."
"You should be forbidden."
"Who's telling you, I am not?"
"There is this thing; I have forgotten how you call it. You know, it's on my neck."
"Ah, that."
"Exactly." I said. "Will you please look away?"
"No."
"We can't both stare at each other. You look away and I stare, then I look away and you stare."
"No."
"Why not?"
"I want to stare all the time."
"Ah, and why?"
"Because I need to remember your fucked up eyes."
"Well I want to remember that amazing colour of your shirt."
"I said I could buy you one."
"It won't have the exact same colour."
"It will."
"It won't."
"It will."
"You're cute. Forget that blasted shirt." I stated.
"Kai you are creepy. That was a joke right?"
"Do you want it to be a joke?"
"Yes." After that I kept silent. It had hurt me. He had hurt me. I didn't know anyone could hurt me that easily. Without realising I had clenched my fists. I only noticed that when saw the blood on my hands half an hour later. All the time there was this feeling - trying to make me cry. I didn't cry though.
"It was a fucking compliment." I hissed, when he searched through his bag. "What's your problem?"
"My problem is that you shouldn't give me any compliments like that." He said.
"Why not?"
"You're not supposed to."
"You haven't got the right to hurt me because of that."
"Ha, ha, ha! As though you never hurt me!" He glared at me.
"When did I hurt you?!"
"You fucking ignore me all the time." I stared out of the window on my side. Outside there wasn't a lot of light anymore. Night was coming.
"Sorry." I whispered. That's when he hugged me.
At the back of my mind I did realise that he stood out for me. In a crowd I could only see him. In a crowd he could only see me.