Love is War
Disclaimer: Crimson Fallen Angel does not make any claims of ownership on the rights of owning Harvest Moon. She does own copies of some of the games, which she sucks at playing and compensates for by writing fan fictions! XD
A/N: So~! This happens to be the fifth Harvest Moon one shot I've done, and it happens to be the very first for DS Cute! Uh, that's at least based off of it. Actually, this is an AU fan fiction. It uses the characters from DS Cute, but in a totally different setting. The main pairing in this story is Claire/Skye. Other than that I'm not giving anymore away!
'I will show you my heart!'
Gray clouds slid over the bright sky that day. The sun's light ever dimmed as it attempted to filter in through those clouds. The world had been turned monochrome. Colors were faded and dim, blending into one another with such ease you barely noticed when one color changed into another. Silence filled my ears, the normal buzzing of the city filtered out of my hearing. A short, desperate breath escaped my lungs, my heart stopped and sunk deep into my stomach. My eyes widened in shock while I stood, frozen in place unable to tear my eyes away from the sight in front of me.
Tears began to run along the water lines of my eyes. At the entrance to my apartment building, was Skye, kissing another woman. I was frozen at the top of the staircase that lead to the ground floor, and to the entrance of the building. I took in short and shallow breaths, trying to regain my heartbeat as the tears in my eyes overflowed and ran down my cheeks.
A few seconds later, the unknown woman and Skye separated from their lip lock, and before I could be seen, I turned and bolted up the next flight of stairs to avoid being seen by either of them. I didn't stop running at the next landing. Instead, I continued up the next flight of stairs and the next, and the next until I made it back to the floor where my apartment was.
Without thinking about it, I locked myself into the apartment, sobbing. As I collapsed to the floor, I berated myself over and over mentally. I was so stupid for letting myself get so emotional over just seeing him kiss another woman! So many other times I've seen him with other women, kissing them, embracing them tenderly, his arm round their waist. . . . I've seen those same women go into his apartment and not leave until the next morning. So many times, so, so many times that I've lost count!
I wiped at my eyes frantically with my clenched fists as I sniffled. If I'd seen that same scene play out so many times in front of me before, then why was it that it still hurt me so much? Why does my heart hurt?
"Heh," I broken-heartedly laughed, "Every single time I see him with another woman this happens to me."
Every. Single. Time.
When Skye is with another woman, I anguish. I want to writhe in pain on the ground where I lay. I want to claw my heart out so I'll stop hurting all the time. I want to squeeze the thing in my hands and make it feel the pain it causes me. I want the pain to end. . . .
. . . .I want to stop loving him.
My head drops in shame. Ignominy sets in on me again, I am ashamed of myself for loving that man.
Loving Skye is like a double-edged sword. When you are with him, he'll treat you like a queen, he's the most affectionate thing to you during the moments he's alone with you. He'll listen to you, hug you and hold you if you cry. . . . He consoles you, comforts you and is kind to you. Skye is benevolent toward women. He treats them as royalty.
But what is the downfall to Skye . . . is that he's like this when he's alone with one of the many women he's with. Skye is a playboy, a hedonist, a philanderer, a womanizer, a pleasure seeker, a sensualist. And every other term I can't think of that means similar things!
He's a rich boy, inherited trust fund money from his parents who own a large, successful company half a country away. He doesn't have to work, and he doesn't go to college. . . . He lives his life merely for pleasure. When you're wealthy and aren't the type to blow your money quickly; why would you work or go to school if you didn't want to?
I'm still sniffling, but I'm not sobbing so bad anymore. Quickly I stand to my feet and head for the bathroom at the end of the hall. I have to clean myself up, get rid of my puffy eyes and stop my nose from making me look like Rudolph the red nosed reindeer. I've known Skye for a while, which is how I know about his situation, his parents being rich and him being a rich boy. I met that player the first day I moved here, into these apartments some three years ago. That first morning even, when my dad and brothers were helping move my things in, an unknown woman left his apartment. I watched her leave as I carried in a box of dishes into my new home, disgusted by how provocatively the lady was dressed in the morning. Though her apparent lack of caked on make-up and rouge lips to complete the ensemble gave it away that she'd stayed the night at Skye's doing Goddess knows what.
Though, it's easy to take a guess just what shenanigans those two were up to the previous night. I grimaced in distaste as the woman flounced away from the door, and from how she turned around to wink and blow a kiss at the man standing in the open doorway she'd left before she hit the elevator button to leave. I hadn't bothered to look at the man who was standing in the open doorway, my eyes had been glued to the woman.
Only when I turned to go about my business of taking my dishes into my apartment did I happen to see the guy who the lady had blown a kiss to before leaving. Of course the guy I am talking about was Skye. Much to my annoyance, he lives in the apartment across from my own. My eyes caught his own oddly aqua colored ones for a moment and I froze in place, and happened to blush from the eye contact. Though that eye contact broke when he smirked something of an arrogant smirk, and said, "Well, hello there my beautiful maiden, I take it that you and I are going to be getting to know one another very well in the coming months since it seems that you are going to be my new neighbor."
At that I stepped back in disgust, and felt the blush on my face deepen in horror, partly due to Skye's words, and also due to the fact that it had just occurred to me that Skye was standing in his doorway shirtless.
That was when he winked at me and said, "Hehe, what are you too stunned by my beauty to reply maiden?"
"You arrogant philanderer!" I huffed, "Like heck you'll be getting to know me!" I shouted as I turned around in a hurry to put my things away in the apartment, but right before I stepped into the widely open doorway I turned back around and yelled, "And do the world a favor and put a shirt on before you step outside of your apartment from now on!"
He laughed at my demand as I turned back around with yet another huff. Believe me when I say this, Skye is one of those guys who looks fine without his shirt off . . . but at the time of that event, I couldn't think of anything better to say to him.
With a sigh I finished running a cold washcloth over my face and then proceeded to stare at myself in the mirror for several moments before finding something about my face that I hated, or that disgusted me as usual. Without a sound I reach over for my make-up and haphazardly re-applied it to my face. Thoughts began to haunt my mind, things I did not want to think.
You know that he's going to spend the night with her so why even bother with the make-up? With that thought I froze with my cover stick under my eye, and questioned myself, Why am I even bothering to do this? Sure Skye flirts with me . . . but ever since we hit the first year mark of our meeting he's stopped making true passes at me. With a defeated sigh, I took the cover stick off of my face and capped it before slamming it back down on the sink. Yes, I love Skye. And yes, I hate the fact that I love that philanderer. But even so, even though I don't want to keep loving him, I do and still I try for some reason to get him to love me.
I want him to love me, I don't want to become just another one of his little 'regulars' or something. . . . All the time I've loved Skye, I have been trying to make him love me back, to just want me. Though that seems to be of no use, since it seems that he's given up on me in manner of speaking. I think that now Skye considers me a friend to him, a real friend, because since the anniversary of the first time we met, in other words, the day I first moved into my appartment, he practically stopped making passes at me. Despite the occasionally flirty compliment that comes from him, the truly perverted things he used to say to me that got on my nerves have stopped. And now when we are around each other, he treats me, like well, like a friend as I said.
"Skye . . . why can't you see my feelings for you? Why do you have to be with so many different women? Is it so hard to just love one?" I muttered to myself as I wandered back out into my dimly lit living room. As time went on, and I spent more time with Skye, I got to see his good side, the non-player, normal person side. I found out why he lives so far from his family, why it is that he never sees them on the holidays and I even found out that he loves to cook, specifically he likes to cook curry, something I didn't expect from him.
I still remember the night he and I just talked about how he had a dream to make the world's best curry, I remember I giggled a bit at his words and he looked at me hurt.
"Well, Skye I don't think that your dream is funny, I giggled just because I wasn't expecting that sort of thing to come from you is all." I'd responded
After that he'd continued on talking about why he wanted to make really good curry, apparently as a child most of his time had been spent with his older sister who was his elder by 7 years. She had practically raised Skye it seemed, as his parents were hardly ever around because they were busy with work related stuff, even when they were home, it seemed that they didn't even pay much mind to Skye or his sister. Skye's sister, Evelyn, wasn't a very good cook, and the only thing she was talented in cooking was curry. Skye was very close to his sister, as she was practically a mother to him. And he stated that eating curry with her for dinner was some of his fondest memories of his childhood. Apparently, Skye was working to cook the best curry in the world because of his sister's curry.
That was when I asked where Evelyn was, and was met with a bitter smile from Skye as he stated simply, "She died when I was fourteen."
Upon seeing that look on his face, I had felt my heart skip a beat all of a sudden. And I think that was when I first started to fall in love with Skye. . . . Ever since that night, my heart hurts when I see him with another woman, and what happened to me today, happens again. And I berate myself for loving him, and not just caring about him as a friend. I hate it. I hate loving a man who doesn't love me back, and I hate loving a guy who is with so many other women.
I. Hate. It.
Why did he have to be my first love? I thought with a slightly bitter smile. Here I was now 21 years old and still stuck on my first ever love. . . . Rather pathetic I think. I sighed again and shut my eyes. Truthfully, I have made a few attempts to confess my feelings to Skye . . . but have ultimately chickened out in the end, and pretended that I had nothing to say or that I was going to say something different.
How many times I have failed at confessing my feelings, I've lost count. The tears started again at the memories of my many failed attempts, and I pulled my knees up and onto the couch, laying myself over on my side as I cried quietly with a small smile on my face.
Some odd hours later I woke up to someone knocking on my door, without realizing it I had fallen asleep on my couch while I had been crying. In a daze I looked around for a second, trying to spot a clock or get the time. My eyes scanned over the digital clock on my oven and it read, 2:39 PM. I'd been sleeping for over six hours, it seemed. Again, more knocking at my door broke my train of thought and brought me back to my senses. I shook my head and groaned a bit as I got to my feet and headed for the door, my hand lightly holding the side of my head.
I unlocked my door and opened it to see who was so frantically pounding on my door, and was met with a familiar face, "Hmm? Skye what's going on?" I asked, my voice sounding rather hoarse to the ears.
Skye sighed, "Claire you're okay, good. . . . Hehe, sorry about the frantic knocking, but I hadn't seen your lovely face all day and was beginning to worry about my beautiful maiden's well being."
My response to his concern and slightly flirty comment was a yawn, "Sorry, I fell asleep on my couch at like eight this morning and slept this whole time. . . ." I continued on.
Skye looked at me surprised, "You've been sleeping?" he suddenly stuck the back of his hand on my forehead checking if I had a fever, "Well it certainly isn't like my lovely maiden to sleep so late into the day. Are you feeling under the weather?"
I shook his hand off of my forehead, "I'm perfectly fine Skye, just a bit tired."
"So then, you are feeling well enough to do something tonight, are you then my maiden?"
"Uhhh. . . . ." I hesitated, he was asking me to do something? "You don't have plans yourself tonight Skye?"
"Hehe, if this Prince of the Stars had things to do tonight, then why would he be asking his maiden to do something with him?" he said in a slightly teasing manner.
I shrugged, "I asked because you're normally busy every night except for holidays."
"Well, tonight I am not busy. As such, I would enjoy it if I could spend time with you."
Really? He just wants to spend time with me because he has nothing better to do? I thought to myself, Am I really just that to him, someone he can fall back on when it is that he has nothing else to do?
As pathetic as it is, I was willing to take that if it meant that I got to spend time with him. . . . "Yeah Skye, that sounds fine, I don't have any plans for tonight anyway."
He smiled one of his charming smiles, "Very well, my lovely maiden I look forward to spending the evening with you~" Skye stated happily as he walked away from me and back toward his apartment.
As I shut my own door, one thing occurred to me, I hadn't bothered to ask when Skye would be back later. . . . I am so pathetic, I'm willing to be his backup, someone he can just come to and do something with when he's got nothing better to do! Gah! I am so, so stupid! I berated myself.
More tears formed in my eyes. Not ones of sorrow, but ones of embitterment. At both myself, and at Skye for using me as nothing more than a backup. I took in a deep breath and acted without thinking, I stormed out of my apartment and over to Skye's, and knocked on his door, loud. I'd had enough, I've been in love with Skye for a long time now! And I am sick of having to be a mere backup to him for when he has nothing better to do!
When Skye opened the door he was shocked to see me, "Claire–!"
Without a single warning, I threw my arms around Skye and buried my head in his shirt, tears still leaking out of my eyes.
"Claire? What's wrong, what has my maiden crying?" he asked me, guiding me into his apartment while shutting the door behind us. As soon as we were in private, I looked up at him, my face contorted into a look of anger and sadness. "It isn't fair Skye," I started, "It isn't fair that you do this to me."
"D-Do what?"
"It isn't fair that you only see me as a backup, you only come and talk to me, or ask me to hang out with you when you have nothing else to do! Why? Why am I only good enough to be a backup for you Skye?" I questioned, desperate for a proper answer.
"Backup? Claire you're not just a backup . . . you're my friend. . . ." he stated, sounding, and looking, hurt.
At his words, I pulled away from him and brought one of my hands up and wiped the tears off of my face before I attempted to speak again. "No Skye, no. . . . I'm not your friend! Friends don't just come to hang out only when they don't have some random girl to hang out with that particular night! Every night you're not talking to me, or when were just hanging out or doing something, you're with some woman!"
". . . . . ." he was silent to my words.
"It hurts, it hurts me a lot Skye. We might not have started off as friends, and with me even hating you, but even still." I sniffled, "To only have you come to see me when you have absolutely nothing else to do isn't fair! It isn't fair that one of your 'friends' gets to spend so little time with you, especially when that friend is in lo–!" I slammed my hand onto my mouth, stopping myself from divulging that one secret to him, no . . . I might have loved Skye, but if I wanted to tell him my feelings, now was the worst possible time to do it.
". . . .Claire? What else did you have to say to me?" he asked me quietly.
"Tell me why. . . . Why aren't I good enough to be more than a backup to you?"
"You aren't a backup to me at all Claire . . . you aren't anything of the sort. You mean more to me than you could possibly imagine." he stated.
"If I mean so much to you, then why does it seem like I don't?"
Skye shook his head at my question, "That's . . . because I didn't want to hurt you."
"Too late!" I yelled, "I am hurting, I'm hurting like Hell Skye!"
Skye winced at my words, "And for that Claire I apologized. If anything, I never wished to hurt you."
At those words, I lowered my head in shame. I still had tears streaming out of my eyes, and my face was red along the bridge of my nose and under my eyes. . . . Quietly I bit my lower lip, feeling a dull ache form around my heart. I hurt him. was all I could think.
"Skye? How can I mean so much to you? What am I to you? You called me your friend, but you said I meant more to you than I could imagine. . . ." I asked, nervous.
"Heh, my maiden, you mean much to this Prince of the Stars, and if he told you and you rejected his words, it would hurt more than just having to stand by you as a friend." Skye answered, having that same bitter smile on his face that he had when he told me that sister had died. "Why I even go out with all of those other women, why I insist on doing those stupid things so many times, and repeating the same mistake over and over again, I do not even know myself."
That was when he looked at me with his aqua colored eyes, and smiled, "But now, I suppose that I cannot be put in any more pain than I already am suffering from. . . ." he stepped toward me, and put his arms around me, positioning one of his arms so that he was clutching onto the back of my head.
And very quietly I heard him say, "Claire, I love you."
And at those words I totally froze, and lost it again with the tears.
"No answer? It's all right, I didn't expect you to love me back." Skye said as he pulled away from me, but before he could totally pull away, I grabbed onto both of his wrists and quietly said something myself.
"I love you too. . . ." and like I had, Skye froze in place and stared at me with wide eyes and I looked up to him, a smile on my face. "I love you Skye."
Within moments, without even me even realizing what was going on, Skye had leaned down and kissed me.
And for the first time since I could remember, when Skye came to mind, my heart did ache, and I didn't hate the fact that I loved that man, for the first time, I was happy thinking about him. . . .
-Fin
A/N: And so concludes my 5th HM one shot, eh, I know that it isn't as good as my others, but I was going more for drama here to be honest and things didn't turn out so great I guess. Heh, call this a test run? Even so, this isn't so bad I think. I do hope you at least found this an enjoyable enough read.
