This is something that I had to get out of my head, its not great, but maybe one day I will re write it. Please let me know what you think!
I was completely taken by surprise when the lips of one Draco Malfoy were pressing against my own. A surge of electricity and emotions were swarming between us. I've never felt this before with anyone before, no man nor woman has
made me swoon just by a simple kiss. It was breath-taking.
"Draco..." he placed a finger on my lips, silencing me.
"Please don't Harry." I shivered at his 's never called me by my first name before. He leaned in again, and I was able to taste him once more. Over the past year, Draco and I had become what I deemed as friends. We still argued over the petty things, but we were different from we were in school. Being Auror partners had forced us to spend days, sometimes even weeks together, and we learned how to survive each other. It wasn't until this exact moment, with Draco standing at my front door, blond hair blowing in the wind and lips against mine, that I realized how wrong we had been. I never hated Draco, no, not hate. I always felt something tho. And now I know what I've been missing all these years.
After a few moments of enjoying our tongues exploring each others mouths, he stopped and instead embraced me. Draco was much taller than I, and had me pressed against his chest. I breathed in the sweet scent of him. There is no way to describe it. It was just...Draco.
He pushed me backwards slowly and I realized he wanted to come in. I obliged, shutting the door behind us. He took off his coat, setting it on my table, as he's done so many times before. He was shaking.
"Harry...I've come to talk to you."
"Well what happened right there wasn't exactly talki-"
"Harry please." I quickly closed my mouth, allowing him to continue. He sat on the couch and put his face into the palms of both hands. I made my way to the couch as well, sitting on the other end, unsure of how to approach the situation. He looked up at me from his current position.
"I'm going to be quick to the point. Harry, ever since we were young, I've felt strongly about you. I used to think it was hate and jealousy. Awhile later, when I realized I was gay, it was lust. But now..." he sighed turning away from me. "But now I see, the reason I was obsessed with you...was because I fell in love with you. And I have been for quite some time."
My heart skipped a beat at those words. Draco Malfoy, that pristine, catty, self-absorbed, beautiful Merlin forsaken man, loves me? He looked over at me as if reading my mind.
"I don't expect you to tell me you love me back. In fact, I would prefer you not to. But...I have a proposition that I would like you to think about." I swallowed and nodded, not wanting to interrupt."I...Merlin I have to stay strong for myself." He stared at the tv in front of him, watching the pictures move around the screen. He sighed. "I don't have much time left."
I raised an eyebrow, not understanding.
"Time left for what?"
"Are you daft Potter? To live dammit! I have cancer." My eyes widened in shock.
"Draco! Oh god, why are we barely hearing this now?"
"Actually I've known for a while now. About a year. I didn't really want anyone to know."
"What about medication? Chemo? The muggles have a good idea about what they're doing!"
He shook his head, holding up a hand to silenced me once more. "Theres no cure for it, and chemo will just prolong what will inevitably come, while making me weak. I couldn't let it interfere with work." I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"So you're just giving up?" He looked up at me and smiled.
"It's not that I'm giving up. I wanted to spend my last year doing what I wanted, not lying in a hospital bed wondering each day if I was gonna have the energy to do anything. I wanted to live. And I have. But now the time is getting closer. I can FEEL it now, death drawing near. My body just feels a tad weaker everyday." I felt my eyes watering. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He scooted closer to me and lifted my chin with his finger.
"Don't cry Harry. Don't be scared. I am not afraid to die. I just...I just don't want to leave without really knowing the truth about US." He kissed me again, it was gentle and passionate. "I told you Harry, I've loved you for a while. Did the thought of us ever cross your mind?"
"I...of course it did Draco. I've always felt this strange connection to you. I've thought about you. Even wanted to just grab you and kiss you. Had to stop myself on some of our missions..." Those were always the hardest nights, having
him lying there in the next bed, wanting to reach out and touch him, hold him. But now, now I wish I had done it years ago.
"Make love to me Harry. Please. I want to feel you. I want to hold you. I've wanted to for so long. I was to much of a scared little boy my whole life, but I knew you watched me, I saw those hopelessly desperate eyes and sighs when we
were close. I wanted to do something about it, but I never could. I don't want to die with any more regrets than I already have."
Draco didn't have to tell me twice. Though the pain of losing him was substantially greater than anything I've felt before, I've wanted to touch him for so long. To be able to kiss him and love him. Now my time was almost up. I didn't want to waste a second more.
After an hour of exploring each others bodies hungrily, we held each other for the night, afraid this was all a dream. I thanked Merlin over and over that I could have this beautiful angel sleeping in my arms. I kissed his forehead, watching his eyelids flutter. Why in the world had I prolonged this? It was the most incredible feeling to have Draco here. My Draco. My love.
We spent the next month together, holding and kissing and talking. Sex with him was magical. He told me stories about his childhood, his family and told me his deepest secrets and fears. Draco's biggest fear was being alone and forgotten.
"I assure you Draco, with all that I have, you will not be alone anymore. And you will definitely not be forgotten in the least bit." He had smiled at that. I took care of him for that month, until I wasn't able to anymore.
He had gotten much weaker, I could also see him retching in pain when he thought I wasnt watching. When I brought him to St Mungos, the tests showed he his body only had a few months left, his magic and his body weakening significantly. It broke my heart to see him lying there in the bed like that. I was unable to do anything, just watch him suffer. It felt like Dumbledore and Sirius all over again. They gave him pain killers to help numb his body. He turned to me with a silly grin.
"Potter, don't you dare be sad. I told you I'm ok with it."
"But...I'm not ok with it. I need you. I barely got you, I can't lose you..."
"I know it was a selfish thing to do, to come after you with only a short time left...maybe it would've been better if I..."
"No Draco please don't regret it for my sake. I...I love you, I treasure everything we've shared with each other. Even before all this...I just wish it didn't have to end this way.." I felt his soft hand touching my cheek.
"Open your eyes Harry, please don't cry. It's not over. Not yet."
"I will be here for you everyday till the end."
"Ever the hero you are." I kissed him gently.
A month later Draco was getting worse, and so was I. He was having a hard time even walking around the hospital anymore. It killed me to see him in so much pain. So much so that my life revolved around making sure he was eating and he was comfortable. Unfortunately I forgot about my health for a while, and it wasn't until I woke up in a hospital bed as well that I knew I had a problem. I had passed out at his bedside.
"Mr. Potter. How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine. Where's Draco? How is he?"
"Mr. Malfoy is alright Mr. Potter, its you I'm worried about right now."
"There's no need to worry, I will start eating more and drinking water."
"Well Mr. Potter, it's not quite so simple." I knew I had a puzzled look on my face. "I'm sure your aware that in the wizarding world, anything is possible yes?" I nodded. "In the past 1000 years, there's been only 4 other cases like your own. Something that only happens to extremely powerful wizards.."
"Spit it out then!" I growled. I needed to get this over with and get back to Draco.
"Stay calm when I tell you this Potter. You're pregnant."
"I'm what! Are you joking with me? Because I don't appreciate this, I need to attend to Draco."
"I do not joke about such things. Have you been intimate with another man about 2 months ago?" I nodded.
"Draco.."
"I assumed as much. Your test results show you are about 7 weeks along. You're just a bit malnourished and dehydrated. You should be taking better care of yourself."
I wasn't sure what kind of reaction to have. A baby? I'm having a baby?
"You can go see Mr. Malfoy now but please don't leave without getting some prescriptions from me. To help the baby grow. You are going to keep it aren't you?" I swallowed and just stared at the doctor. "I don't judge my patients. I only assume due to the fact that this is a rare occurrence indeed and that baby is a product of two powerful wizards. It's a miracle child."
"Wait hold on...so...I mean...could Draco possibly be pregnant too? We don't exactly has a preference as to which one of us...you know..."
"No mr malfoy is not currently pregnant, I've already checked. His body has weakened over the past year and that, mixed with his medication makes it highly unlikely to be able to carry." My eyes drifted to the floor. "Go on Mr, Potter, I'm sure Draco is worried about you."
As I walked thru the hallways of st mumgos, I let it all sink ir. I was having Draco's child. His only child. A baby mixed with both his and my genes. My body has done the near impossible yet again. How would draco react? Would he be happy that a part of him lives on? Upset that he may not be here to see it? So many questions that I didn't know the answer to. My fear grew the closer I got to his door.
"Harry?" I heard a faint whisper as I walked in.
"Its me Draco. I'm here." He opened his eyes slowly and gave me a weak smile.
"How are you feeling?"
"It's always about me Potter. How are you feeling? You took a nasty fall."
I closed my eyes and sighed. "I...I'm ok..."
"I'm glad."
"But...there's something else..." I did my best to explain the recent events. Draco listened eagerly. His eyes lit up and a small smile grew on his face.
"We're having a baby? I can't believe it...wow...a baby.." he held my hand and squeezed. "I'm so happy..." I smiled back.
"I'm glad...I wasn't sure how you would react to the news."
"Why wouldn't I be happy?" I looked down at the floor to avoid his gaze.
"Oh...I see..its because...I wont be here...to see it...to hold it...I...I hadn't thought about that..the news just took everything else away for a bit..."
"Draco...I'm sorry."
"You have no reason to apologize Harry. You didn't do this to me. You're a sweet, wonderful person, and I'm glad I ever met you. And even though I wont meet our baby...I love it just as much. And when I die...I will be watching. You will make a great parent Harry." My eyes watered and I hugged him gently, making sure I didn't squeeze his fragile form.
"I can't believe us." I smiled wiping a tear from his face.
"Yes, Potter, always defying the odds." We both laughed and gazed at each other
lovingly.
"I will still be here for you."
"I know my love."
Unfortunately that day came much to soon. I was about 17 weeks along, leaving the doctor's office with a picture of my unborn baby. I was headed back to st mungos to see draco. I wanted to tell him the gender so we could choose a name. I practically skipped there. But once I came to his floor, I could tell something was wrong. Healers were rushing frantically in and out of Draco's room, and I pushed my way thru carefully, avoiding any bumps to my ever-growing stomach. I saw him lying in bed, paler than I'd ever seen, his chest heaving and he attempted to breath.
"Mr. Potter, I think his time has come..." My lips quivered. I had prepared myself for this part. But my emotions took over and I forgot everything except that I was losing my lover.
"Draco.." I stood next to his bed and crouched so we could be face to face.
"Harry...I'm so glad you're here...I..I've been holding on...waiting for you..trying so hard.." he gasped between sentences.
"I'm here now my love. I wont leave your side."
Draco smiled weakly and put a hand to my stomach. "I know this is it...but I can't think of a better way to end it." His eyes fluttered and his chest began to heave more. He gasped for breath. A couple of healers were next to him running tests. "We're losing him. I'm sorry Mr. Potter but you will need to say your goodbyes."
"No! Draco please don't go!"
"I'm so...sorry Harry. You know...I love...you...be strong...for our baby..."
"Draco, it's a boy! We're having a boy! A little you and me! Draco."
He smiled weakly. "Baby boy...scorp...scorpi...scorpius harry."
"Ok my love, Scorpius." I gave him one last kiss to his hand before I felt the life leave him and the magic flicker away.
6 months later..
Ron, Hermione and I walked in silence thru the grounds of malfoy manor. The tiny baby in my arms was sound asleep. I looked down at his blond hair poking out from his blue hat and smiled.
When we reached our destination, my friends stayed back aways to give me some time alone. I got down on my knees and placed a hand on the white headstone.
"Hello again my love. I've brought someone for you to meet." I looked down at my baby. "Your son. Scorpius Draconis Malfoy-Potter. He's..well...he looks just like you. He's a little part of you that didn't have to leave. A part that will live on." The bundle in my arms stirred, yawning, and looking up at me with big gray eyes. "I wish you could meet him Draco. You would be as much in love as I am. Not a day goes by that I don't think about you. Everything about you. Your laugh. Your smile. Those snarky little comments you made. You became my everything so quickly. And you were taken just as fast. I will always love you. And I will make sure your son knows how lucky he is to be your son." With that, I stood and Hermione placed a hand on my shoulder, while Ron laid a bouquet of white roses on the grave. The wind began to blow and I closed my eyes, enjoying the breeze, imagining it was Draco's way of telling me he was there. I brushed the tears away and hugged Scorpius. My friends led me back the way we came.
"Goodbye Draco.."