This is based off of the Japanese song Black Swallowtail Butterfly, which plays at the beginning of the anime xxxHolic.
"What the hell are you doing here?" I holler, but he only smirks. He knows that I won't hurt him, because dammit, I can't, not when he looks at me like that. At his touch, I feel like I'm boiling over, and my cheeks flush, but I don't want to feel like this, but dammit, he's just so warm and he loves me, I think, and no one else does, so as he runs his firm, fat fingers through my thick braid I feel special.
It seems as if my mind and body are melting with your kiss.
As I scoot closer, his damn white Rukh flutter around my own black ones, and I can almost smell it, the purity, the good-naturedness that I've always been taught to be against, but here with him it feels right, and this is all I want right now, so I go limp and allow him to deepen the kiss.
Your heart is so beautiful it's almost nauseating.
His hands grab at my waist, and I don't push him away because I don't want to, because this is good, I think. And deep down something inside me is grateful, is happy that he actually chose me instead of that freckle-faced little shit that follows him around like a lost puppy. Because I'm powerful, I know it, and he's powerful, and we should be together, because that's how it's supposed to be.
Why would you kiss someone like me, who can't do a thing?
For this moment, all I want is for him to take me away, away from Al Sarmen and that old witch, and away from all the princes and princesses that just don't get me. I don't care if he takes me to Sindria, or to some run-down little shitshack in the middle of the desert, I want to be with him. And so in more timid movements than I would've liked, I pull away from him and stare into those golden globes, and I speak in a shy voice that isn't mine.
"Please. Take me with you. Take me to Sindria." And I await his reaction, anxiety bubbling in my stomach.
Please don't say it's ridiculous.
Something inside me shatters when I see his eyes take on that look, and I knew that he was going to laugh at me, so when does start, I can't stop the acid tears that bleed from my eyes. I sit up and straighten up and stare murder into those eyes, those damn, stupid eyes that have me melting under their every gaze.
"You idiot!" I hiss, and reach for my wand, but instead he pushes me back onto the ground with only one hand and kisses me lightly with lips far too warm and soft, and I'm melting again, as I watch him walk away through blurred, watery vision.
That kind of life is good...
...
The next day, I'm not really all that surprised to find myself sulking and pathetic, because there's this weird feeling in my gut and I'm longing for him, and it's freaking all I can think about right now and it's driving me crazy. So vacantly, I look to the black butterfly-like Rukh that flutter around me and their shrieks seem quieter, for some reason, and vacantly, this reminds me of the first thing he called me when we met.
Like a black swallowtail butterfly...