"What Mark was Doing."
(01-08-08)

Rating: PG +13. Contains mentions of Sexual References/Kissing (at the end.)
IF I NEED TO UP THE RATING, PLEASE TELL ME.
Genre: Comedy.Friendship (and I was going to say 'Suspense' lulz.)
Summary: ONESHOT. Late one night, Roger hears some disturbing sounds coming from the bathroom.
Author's Notes: Oh, I just wanted to write something to distract me from my schoolwork.
Inspiration: My itchy back. "
Disclaimer: I don't own RENT.

Please note: "Quotation marks" are things that are spoken.
'Apostrophes' are thoughts.
(Bold things) are actions during mid-speech.
Third person narrative.

-:-

It was currently 10:10 PM in the appartment and all was quiet. Roger had retired to his couch earlier that evening to get some well-deserved shut eye so that left only the infamous film director/cameraman, Mark, the only awake inhabitant.

After several minutes of shouting for Mimi in his dreams, Roger decided to go to the bathroom to wash his sweaty face. Walking out of his room, he made his way to the bathroom when something caught his attention. He could hear someone. Slowly, he made his way to the toilet door (which was always shut) and pressed his ear against its wooden surface.

"O-oh." He heard. "Mmm..."

He knew that voice. It was his roommate, Mark. Roger was slightly relieved to know they weren't being burgled . His relief was sort lived when the grunting sounds increased in rate. 'What is he doing?' He thought, pressing his ear harder against the door.

"O-oh. That spot! Ahhh. It feels so good!" Moaned Mark on the other side of the door.

Roger pulled away from the door and leaped a meter back. He felt his ears warm up and a blush creeping slowly on his face. 'He must be...' Seconds of deep thought later, Roger started hopping on the spot- he really needed to use the toilet- but he wondered whether he should disturb Mark.

Making a bold move, he knocked on the door. "Mark! You alright in there?" He called out.

The sounds stopped and he heard the bathroom floor creak as Mark (he figured) walked towards the door. It opened and revealed his fully-dressed, slightly out-of-breath roommate. "Course I am. Why?" Mark asked, cocking his eyebrow.

"WHAT WERE YOU DOING?!" He shouted at him, before the other shushed him. "Were you...you know..."

It took Mark several minutes of silence and deep thought until he fully comprehended what he meant. He fell to the ground, clutching him stomach tightly, laughing. "Wh-what?! No! I was scratching my back, you freak!" Replied Mark, still laughing.

Roger's face turned beetroot-red as he mumbled an apology before turning away and walking off- no longer interested in using the toilet.

Finally collecting himself, Mark got up off the floor, went back to the toilet and locked the door behind him.

-ALTERNATE ENDINGS-

Please note that these pick off from where we just left Mark (who just walked back into the bathroom and locked the door behind him.) One of them is completely harmless, the other...um, not so much?

#1: He walked to the toilet, sat and continued scratching his back. "Idiot." He grumbled.

-:-

#2: He walked to the bathtube and pulled away the shower curtains. "Maureen, come out. He's gone." He said, before jumping back onto the loo. Immerging from the bathtube, a skinny, fair-skinned woman with long, messy, dark-brown hair smirked at him. She walked seductively over towards Mark before sitting herself on his lap.

"Where was I?" Asked Maureen, running her eyes up and down his body.

"I think you were kissing me?" He replied shakily.

Her eyes stopped wondering and she pulled away his shirt for him. "Oh yeah." She replied. Mark grinned before dragging the woman down into a brutal but passionate kiss.

-:-

...Yeah.

Kittos: I'm not expecting much feedback from this, just because it sucks ass. My eyelid is itching which is really annoying because I just put on make-up and every time I scratch it, my eyeliner smudges.
Yami Kittos: What happened to Joanne?
Kittos: I don't know and I'm guessing Joanne doesn't know either.
Yami Kittos: Oh, and guess what. Everyone was out of character again!
Kittos: I know, I know. "