I'm back with another Pokémon parody story. As the title suggests, this story was supposed to be about Shaymin (my second favorite Pokémon, thanks to Giratina and the Sky Warrior). Shaymin is in it, but it didn't quite turn out the way I wanted. Instead, the main focus is on parodying two situations in the Pokémon anime that I find annoying.

Be Grateful to Shaymin

Ash, Brock, and Dawn were enjoying a nice soup cooked over their campfire, when a Ponyta leapt into their midst. The next few moments were total havoc: the soup pot was kicked over and soup spilled everywhere, Brock's table was snapped in half, and the whole campsite, supplies and all, was torched by a fire blast.

"Nooo!" Brock wailed. He fell to his knees and sobbed. When Ponyta's clomping steps announced its approach, Brock met the vile Pokémon with a hateful glare and threw a handful of dirt at it. "Get out of here! Get, you monster!" Burying his face in his arm and sobbing, Brock mourned his melted silverware.

"No need to worry, Brock…" Dawn said, giving her friend a pat on the back.

"Yeah, that's the spirit!" Ash said.

"Just shut up!" Brock wailed. "Everything I ever cherished, gone in an instant! You have no idea what I've lost because you're both just little kids!"

"Gee…" Ash frowned and scratched the top of his cap.

"Pika," Pikachu, perched atop Ash's shoulder, whispered.

Some bushes rustled and a black-haired boy ran into the clearing. After huffing and panting for a few seconds, he cried out, "Ponyta!" He grabbed ahold of Ponyta's reins and spoke soothing words as he petted its muzzle.

Ash donned a big, energetic grin. "Is that your Ponyta?"

"That's right. I'm so sorry if she caused you any trouble!"

Dawn gave a thumbs-up. "No need to worry!"

"What are you talking about?" roared Brock. "Look what that thing's done! It's burned up all our supplies and wrecked all our tables, chairs, and cookware! You're an irresponsible trainer! Keep that thing in its Poké Ball!"

"I'm sorry! It's just that I don't have any friends, and they say this is the best way to meet people!"

"So you let it loose on purpose!? What the heck is wrong with you? These aren't pets; they're dangerous creatures of immense power! You're a horrible trainer and a horrible person!"

Ash shook his head. "If you want to make friends, you should try wrecking people's bikes. After you do that, they won't leave you alone for a couple seasons!"

"Pika!" Pikachu said in agreement.

Dawn smiled and nodded, but then she pursed her lips and thought about it for a moment. "Hey!"

"But, oh man! I kind of feel bad now," said Ash. "I thought it was weird how we kept meeting people like this. I guess they were all trying to make friends."

"No need to worry about characters of the week!" Dawn said with a shrug. "I don't even bother memorizing their names. Let's see… There's that girl who lost her Sandshrew at the bottom of a lake, that guy with the glasses who looks like an older version of May's little brother… and, yadda yadda, a bunch of others." Dawn waved her hand dismissively.

"You mean Mira and Conway?" asked Ash.

"You remember their names?"

"Of course! They're our buddies! And me and Pikachu never forget a buddy! Right, buddy?"

"Pi-pikachu!"

"Alright! I'm really fired up now! Hey, new guy, want to battle?"

The Ponyta kid shuffled his feet uncertainly. "Well, we're actually more into Pokémon contests, since the ridiculous rules give us a chance to-"

"Step aside, Ash!" Snarling, Brock shoved Ash out of the way and brandished a Poké Ball. "I demand satisfaction for your gross negligence! Now, battle!"

"Ahh! Stop! I don't want to! In a real battle there are no judges to take away extremely arbitrary points from a bar!"

"Shut up!"

Brock came at his opponent hard, giving the Ponyta kid no choice but to defend himself, and with his amazing gym leader powers, Brock wiped the floor with the kid.

"You lost!" said Ash cheerily. "Guess that means you're paying for our train tickets!"

"Ah, man…"

The four trainers and their Pokémon headed to the nearest station and boarded the train that was headed towards Ash's next big battle. The Ponyta kid stuck with them in their seat compartment, but he didn't say anything, so an awkward silence descended on the group. An hour after departure, the silence was interrupted when a mysterious green hedgehog-like Pokémon wandered in.

"Whoa, I don't believe it!" said Dawn. "It's Shaymin, the Gratitude Pokémon!"

Shaymin tilted its head. "Are you grateful to Shaymin?" It hopped up onto Dawn's lap.

"Wow! A legendary Pokémon has literally fallen right onto our laps!" Brock said.

Ash flashed a brilliant grin and bandied his fists about excitedly. "What are you waiting for, Dawn? Catch it with a Poké Ball!"

"Yeah! Hold on…" Dawn rummaged through her bag until she found an empty Poké Ball. Giggling, Dawn said, "I'd be super grateful if you came with me, Shaymin! You'd be super amazing to show off in my next contest, so there's no need to worry!"

"Okay! Sounds good to me! Shaymin wants to make lots of people grateful to Shaymin!"

"Wait!" Ponyta boy, a horrified look on his face, leapt to his feet. "You can't go around catching Shaymin!"

"Really? I can't?" Dawn lowered her Poké Ball by a few degrees.

"Shaymin is the sacred guardian of my people!" said Ponyta boy. He shook his head and gave a disgusted look at Ash and Dawn. Under his breath, he muttered, "And to think I wanted to be friends with you people!"

"Well, I guess we should respect his people's traditions," Brock said. "Even if he's a pretentious jerk who allows his dangerous, violent Ponyta run loose in other people's campsites."

"Ahh!" Ash and Dawn both moaned in disappointment.

Ash puckered his lips in an irritated sort of way. "I mean, it's not like he can stop us, since Brock knocked out all his Pokémon."

But despite their moaning and protests, the matter was settled, and Shaymin was not to be caught. Ponyta boy said he had to get Shaymin back to his village, but he didn't object to Ash and company playing with Shaymin until he had arranged for transportation.

"You sure you don't want to catch me, Ash?" Shaymin asked. "I really liked the idea of being a contest star!"

"Nah. It wouldn't be right, you see. You're the guardian Pokémon of that Ponyta guy's village."

"But Ash, I don't know that guy. And he doesn't seem very grateful to Shaymin."

"Huh? You really don't know him?"

"Nope. And Shaymin isn't a guardian either, since Shaymin are migratory."

"Hmm… yeah, well…" Ash crossed his arms and tilted his head. He strained his brain thinking the situation over, but his ten-year old mind, ever susceptible to the most transparent of deceptions, just couldn't grasp it. "But I'm sure he wouldn't lie about it, so… Plus, every time a legendary is caught, it messes up the balance of nature and stuff. I've seen it happen."

Shaymin exhaled. "Alright. Shaymin can find other ways to make everyone grateful."

Ponyta boy soon came rushing down the train and threw open their compartment door. His left arm was now in a sling, but he had a big grin on his lips. "Alright, I'm back! I found some dude with a Pidgeot who can take us back to my home. Or more like, his Pidgeot found me!" he laughed and bandied about his broken arm.

A boy with a bird cage in on hand and a Pidgeot on his shoulder appeared behind Ponyta boy. The Pidgeot dude laughed and said, "Yeah, I'm so sorry my Pidgeot mauled you with its wing attack and broke your arm!"

"No need to worry!" said Ponyta boy. "After all, we're best buds now! And we can use your Pidgeot to transport Shaymin back to my village!"

Pidgeot dude's eyes lit up when he saw the Shaymin on Dawn's lap. "Holy Murkrow! A legendary Pokémon!" He licked his lips as he pulled an Ultra Ball out of his bird cage.

"No!" wailed Ponyta boy as he threw himself between his new friend and the guardian Pokémon he was sworn to protect. "You can't catch Shaymin! He's our guardian Pokémon!"

Pidgeot guy sighed. "Aw, man. I guess those are the rules."

"Right. Now let's get going right away. Come on, Shaymin." Ponyta boy held out a hand to the green hedgehog.

Shaymin gave one last imploring look to Ash. "Ash, I don't want to go with those guys."

"Alright. No need to worry." Ash gave Shaymin a reassuring pat on the head before turning to the two trainers in the doorway of their train compartment. "Guys, Shaymin says he wants to come with us."

"That's a lie!" Ponyta boy roared. Foam dripped from his mouth and a rabid look appeared in his eyes. "You're just saying that because you want to take the guardian Pokémon of my village!"

"No, it's not like that!" Ash said.

"It's what Shaymin wants!" Dawn said.

"Lies! Lies! You're all just greedy thieves!"

As a snarling and raving mad Ponyta boy stomped into the compartment, Ash and his friends all retreated to the window.

"Uh oh! Ash, he's scary!" said Shaymin. "You better be grateful to Shaymin, because I'm getting us out of here!"

Shaymin transformed into its Sky Forme and then blasted a giant hole in the side of the train. Next, Shaymin used its magical powers to push Ash, Dawn, Brock, and Pikachu out into the open air. Since the train crossing a land bridge at that moment, the ground was seventy feet underfoot.

"Holy Murkrow!"Tears formed in Brocks eyes as he flailed his arms and kicked his legs against the air.

"Here we go!" Ash cheered.

"No need to worry!" Dawn shrieked.

They didn't plummet to their doom, but were carried by Shaymin's power off into the moonlit sky. Seeing this, Ponyta boy was enraged. "No! Don't you dare steal Shaymin! Come back here with our guardian Pokémon, you degenerate pieces of Muk! You worthless Trubbish!"

After dragging Ash and his friends through some trees and scuffing up their clothes, Shaymin set the band down at a little clearing.

Holding its head high, Shaymin asked, "Are you grateful to Shaymin?"

"Grateful!" Brock cried out. "What, that you almost killed us?"

"No need to worry…" Dawn staggered on wobbly legs with one hand over her mouth, until she fell to her knees in front of a rowan tree.

"Hey, come on guys! That was amazing!" Ash said. "We should do it again sometime!"

"Yeah!" Shaymin cheered. "Be grateful to Shaymin!"

With a flick of its head, Shaymin used its psychic powers to throw Ash and his friends back into the air. The three trainers and Pikachu flew through the skies, flailing about and spinning like ragdolls, screaming and shrieking the whole time. Just before they smacked into the ground and broke their necks, Shaymin caught them with its powers.

"Aren't you grateful to Shaymin?" Shaymin asked as it lowered Ash and company gently back to the ground.

"No!" the three all cried at once.

Even Ash and Pikachu were pale. "I thought I was going to die!"

Weakly, Dawn uttered, "Don't… ever… do that… again…"

Brock rubbed his cheek against the ground. "Sweet terra firma."

"Ha ha ha! Were you surprised?" A new Pokémon , a little dark-colored genie, appeared from out of a magic hoop vortex in the ground.

"Hey, are you grateful to Shay-" Shaymin stopped short when it saw Hoopa. Shaymin growled at Hoopa. "Get out of here, you copycat jerk!"

"Were you surprised?" Hoopa asked sheepishly.

"No! I told you to stop copying me! That's my thing and you're ruining it with your cheap imitation! You Shaymin imitation!"

"But I can pull other legendaries through my hoop…"

To prove its point, Hoopa pulled Dialga partway through, nearly ending all existence in the process. Fortunately, Shaymin cut Hoopa off before it could finish summoning the fearsome being.

"You're such a moron! You blatantly rip off my style, and then you think you're better just because you've got some cheap gimmick! Why don't you just go disappear in the Reverse World?!"

"Hoopa wasn't trying… to be better… Hoopa just… Oh, forget it! Hoopa doesn't need you; Hoopa can summon friends anytime Hoopa wants!" Hoopa made a sad, droopy face and floated away.

"Hey!" Ash grinned. "Another legendary Pokémon! And we can catch that one, right?" Ash readied a Poké Ball to catch Hoopa.

"Waaaait!"

Astride Pidgeot, Ponyta boy and Pidgeot dude descended.

"Hoopa is also the sacred guardian of my people!" said Ponyta boy. "Please don't try to catch it!"

"Ah, man!" Ash moaned.

"Okay, now I think he's just making stuff up," Dawn said.

"He's definitely sketchy. I knew it the first moment I saw him," Brock said. "Especially the way he wouldn't give us his name, probably so we couldn't track him down and get him to pay for all the stuff his Ponyta wrecked!"

"Shaaaymin!"

Before Brock could get Ponyta boy's contact information, a flock of Shaymin flew overhead. Unlike Ash's new friend Shaymin though, these ones couldn't talk and only said their name.

"My friends!" Shaymin said. It turned and gave Ash a wistful look. "I'm going now. I hope you're grateful… because Shaymin is grateful to you for all your help!" Sniffing, Shaymin flew off into the sky after its herd.

"Shaymin!" Ash and his friends, and even Ponyta boy and Pidgeot guy, all had tears streaming down their cheeks. "We are grateful, Shaymin!" Ash yelled. "We'll never forget you!"

"Hee hee!" Hoopa tore after Shaymin to harass it with Latios's Luster Purge attack from its hoop. "Were you surprised? That whole forlorn thing Hoopa was doing was just an act! Were you surprised? Were you surprised?"

"Get out of here! Stop following Shaymin!" Shaymin wailed. "Shaymin doesn't care if you are grateful or not! Not at all!"

As Shaymin and Hoopa bickered, a big Dragonite came out of a cloud in the sky and soared at high speed right into the midst of the Shaymin herd. Atop Dragonite's back was none other than Iris.

"Alright!" Iris cheered. She threw two Ultra Balls at Shaymin and Hoopa, and caught both of them. She let out a big whooping cheer for her feat.

A bloodcurdling scream erupted from Ponyta kid's lips: "Nooo! This can't be happening! Our guardian Pokémon!" He curled up into a ball on the ground and sucked his thumb.

Ash could only gape. "Oh, man! That is so unfair! Those should have been our Pokémon!"

Dawn crossed her arms and nodded in agreement.

Brock was so shocked that he fell to his hands and knees and stared at the ground.

Iris shrugged and sighed. "What a little kid! If they were your Pokémon, then you should have caught them already!"

"You big meanie!" Ash whined.

Brock was still recovering from his shock. "It's impossible… She caught two legendaries with only one try each! That never happens!" He put his hand to his chin and pursed his lips. "And also… what does Iris want those for anyway? They're not even dragon types, are they?"

"Hmm…" Dawn nodded as she tapped her chin. Then she grinned and snapped her fingers. "No need to worry!" To get to the bottom of things, Dawn leaped up into the air and grabbed ahold of Dragonite's tail. Iris didn't even notice her passenger. Looking down at Ash and Brock, Dawn winked, stuck out her tongue, and saluted with her free arm all at the same time. When Dragonite took off into the sky at high speed, Dawn screamed and held on for dear life.

"Man, that is so unfair!" said Ash. "That looks like so much fun!"

Author Notes: Before you complain: I am aware that neither Conway and Mira cannot technically be classified as characters of the week, since Conway is a recurring character and Mira is a character from the video games. Even the author cannot remember the names of real characters of the week! I am also aware that Shaymin doesn't have psychic powers. But it's okay, because talking legendaries in the movies always have psychic powers even if it doesn't make sense, right? Just look at Entei. Granted, it wasn't a real Pokémon, but still…

Moving on, here are the two situations in the anime I was parodying, in case you weren't able to catch them: firstly, meeting new characters when the new character's Pokémon wanders over to Ash and company, and then the trainer shows up looking for the Pokémon. It is infuriating how often this happens in the show. The second situation is people telling Ash that he can't catch a legendary because it is his village's guardian Pokémon. This might not be a recurring situation (I'm not sure), but it happened at least once with Meloetta. I think the guy who came looking for Meloetta was in an early episode, but I'd been missed most of the episodes of the Black and White season, so, to me, he came out of nowhere and I was really mad about it and I absolutely hated him. My thoughts: "Here's a legendary Pokémon that seems to want to be part of Ash's party, but this stupid guy comes with some stupid reason for why that can't happen." So I was furious about that, even if I pretty much knew the show writers were never going to let Ash have a legendary Pokémon (not even one that seems insignificant and not too powerful).