Summary: A continuation of episode 5x09

A/N: I intended to write this as a third chapter of Routines (for some reason the muse is taking that storyline arc and beating me over the head with it), but it has turned into something a little longer. Helps if you have read Routines, but can do without (but I'd be super-happy if you read it anyway!)

All the characters belong to Tess Gerritson and TNT. I wish I owned them, really I do.

Thanks

"Puzzle Pieces"

Maura's heart was aching for Jane.

Amidst the noise of the baseball, and the family, and the pizza and anchovies and beer – despite the normalcy that everyone had done their very best to provide, Maura knew. She knew it was an illusion. It was in the way she saw Jane move, beyond the pain of her injuries there was a caution, a hesitation. The way she held up her pizza and anchovies to everyone, smiling, as if to show them that she was ok – she was on the road to mending – but behind her eyes was a terrible absence. Maura could see right through those tumultuous eyes, ordinarily dark and stormy and full of intensity… tonight they were duller, blunter… as if she was looking at a faded photograph.

She felt it when she touched Jane's lower back as she descended to the couch, her fingers lightly brushing the dip between her L4/L5 vertebrae, and feeling the extreme tension all around them. Like she was bracing herself for something… as if it was all she could do to keep herself together, through this.. during this…

"How am I supposed to be feeling?"

The words echoed in Maura's ears, each syllable hurtling and knocking around her synapses like a pinball machine…. far louder than the noise from the TV could, louder than the busy conversation around her. She closed her eyes for a moment and inhaled deeply, steadying herself from the ache within her own heart.

Jane had said she wanted to wait.

Maura inwardly shook herself. There had been no other way than this. She couldn't very well stand at the door and explain to her own family, her own mother, that they weren't wanted. That they weren't helping… they weren't what Jane needed.

Maura found herself distracted by the shouts and the "whoops" of the room as another home run was scored. Instinctively a smile went to her face.

At least show you are engaged in the activity, Maura tersely told herself. Don't let them see what you know.

And you do know.

Her hand lingered in its spot… Jane had made no move to shift away from it. Moments like these warmed Maura's heart as much as the reality tightened around it like a metal vice. She felt the ripples, the uncertainty, the burden on Jane's consciousness; she felt it directly under her fingertips. She closed her eyes and gently brushed them over Jane's back – just a small movement – to communicate, as best she could in a crowded room, that she understood.

She felt warm fingers squeeze hers, and she opened her eyes to find Jane had reached around her back with her right hand, as she regarded her with a sad half-smile. Maura tilted her head and offered back the warmest smile she could muster.

Jane was exceptional, how she did this – how her love for her family and desire to protect them from the things she didn't want them to worry about, didn't want them to see, forced a terrible burden on her. But she allowed Maura to see. It was a certainty in their friendship that Maura drew much of her strength from these days.

After the game had finished, the family had little reason to stay. Jane's mood had tapered out to reflect what one would expect from someone who had only just been discharged from hospital. She was quiet, subdued, and her eyelids were notably heavy despite her attempts to suggest otherwise. Maura had seen… felt.. the adjustment in Jane's disposition and caught the eye of Angela, who initially furrowed her brow before shrugging her shoulders slightly in agreeable defeat and a knowing concern. Jane, clearly struggling to stay awake after the events of the day, blearily glanced between her best friend and her mother, as if she was missing the joke.

Angela cleared her throat.

"Ok boys, we should all get going" – she emphasised the 'all' by looking squarely at Frankie. She knew Korasak would be mature enough to follow her lead, but Frankie – goodness, sometimes he had the wits of a snail.

"Frankie –" Angela repeated, "Jane needs sleep." She shot a knowing glance at Maura. "All of us need to go."

Maura nodded slowly in response. It was a look she had come to know, and to love about Angela. It was the look that said; "my baby is in your hands now, and we can't help her. So you need to fix it."

Maura protectively wrapped her arm around Jane's shoulder, gently pressing a kiss to her cheek. Jane smiled helplessly at Angela.

The three piled out of the house almost as noisily as they had entered, Jane waving goodbye and leaving Frankie with a parting punch on his upper arm. Maura had stopped Angela before the door closed with a gentle hand on her shoulder, whispering "thank you" in a voice only the two of them would hear. Angela nodded, cast one final anxious look behind Maura at the couch, as if to say 'Are you sure she is okay'?

Maura smiled and softly nodded her head. Angela understood. Then said, more loudly.

"We'll just be over here if you need us!"

"Thanks Ma" the distinctively raspy voice sounded from the couch. "I'm ok – Maura's all over it."

Maura said her final wordless goodbyes to Angela before gently pressing the door shut, knowing that she would handle the pleasantries for Frankie and Korsak on her behalf. She paused a moment, her fingers resting against the surface of the door, before turning around.

Jane's head was against the back of the couch, eyes staring up at the ceiling. Maura approached her, stepping into her field of view and smiling.

"Hey." She said, then made a point of turning to look up at the same spot Jane had just been studying. "If you're going to tell me there is a mark up there…"

The corners of Jane's eyes creased in a smile and she shook her head. "No, but I think I saw one trying to make its way onto the ceiling – it got destroyed by Maura's iron dome of cleanliness before it could even get half way up the wall…"

Maura chuckled, the resonance of her laugh – deeper than one might expect from someone of her speaking voice and frame. "Well technically the mark would have been quite successful reaching the ceiling, as the iron dome is an anti-missile initiative, but very poor at ground protection." She ran her hand tenderly down the side of Jane's cheek and leaned down to kiss her forehead, "Come on-" she continued, walking around to the other side of the couch and perching herself on the arm rest. She held out her hand. "Let's get you to bed."

Jane looked up at her and scrunched up her face in protest. "I'm fiiine." She drew out the last word in a mock whine. Maura simply tilted her head, wiggling her outstretched fingers.

"Jane, you were falling asleep sitting up only moments before." Jane glanced sheepishly at her and Maura's expression softened. "Your injuries require rest to heal – real rest." Her eyes flicked up to the darkness outside. "Goodness knows I could do with an early night."

There was a long pause, before finally Jane huffed, rolling her eyes dramatically. "Okay okay… coming."

As it was, Jane did an excellent job extracting herself from the couch, by herself. She had used the armrest to help take pressure off her stomach muscles, and only once she was standing, bent over, did she reach a hand towards Maura to help her upright. Maura took her hand, as Jane gingerly navigated her way to a full standing position, wobbling slightly Maura noted thanks to the effects of fatigue and an unstable core, and of course the medication she was on to make it better. Jane closed her eyes, steadied, then opened them slowly, her gaze fixing on Maura's face.

"Okay?" She asked, gently.

With a loud breath escaping from between her lips, Jane nodded. Maura smiled.

"Go clean your teeth – I'll just go upstairs and get ready, then I will come down and help you change."

"I'll be fine Maura, really." Jane protested, but Maura just took her hand and led her away from the couch.

"Of course you will – but I know the damage, and I sincerely doubt that will be tonight. You may surprise me, of course, but either way I need to check on that bruising so…. " She released Jane's hand and lightly touched her shoulder "..I will see you in a few minutes."