Author: EarthAngie

Fandom: Conviction/SVU

Pairing: Alex/Olivia

Disclaimer: Characters not mine... fantasies are.

Bitter

I watched Alex briskly leave her i fiance's /i side when her co-worker left the party. She followed him to the stair case, where he turned to see her, looking at him expectantly. As angry as I was at her, I still couldn't deny how incredibly beautiful she looked standing there. Her gold hair wrapped up lazily in curls, her glowing skin and flowing peach dress. My admiration dropped when I watched him kiss her cheek... she closed her eyes and leaned into him. Why did she want more from him? Why did she want anything from any of these men?

He walked away from her with an apologetic look and she just stood there. This was my chance. I began to walk towards her but she didn't seem to notice. My heels were silent as I made my way over the hallway rug. She stared blankly at the empty staircase in front of her.

"Welcome back," I said quietly to her. Her head snapped up at my low tone. Thoughts must've been flooding her mind as she took me in for the first time in... months? Had she seen me attend her first trial back, I wondered? Or years? Or was it when we shared a hotel room before convicting Liam Connors?

My simple, low cut, black dress hugged my body. She had bought it for me, but we never had a chance to go out. She left two weeks after she gave it to me. She recognized it, I could tell. I wanted it to be a slap in the face for her.

"Uh... Olivia..." What could she say? She had come back from the W.P.P. from who knows where and she hadn't even come to see me. Now she was engaged? What the fuck?

"I should say, welcome back and congradulations," I whispered harshy to the embarassed woman.

"Olivia, did you come here just to attack me?" She replied angrily, turning to leave. I grabbed her arm forcefully, turning her to face me. I even think a flash of fear crossed her face. I pulled her away from the opening of the dinning room and guided her down the hall. It was nearly empty but I didn't really care either way. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Yeah, I'm such a bitch right?" I retorted, half laughing at her foolish statement. "I mean, I only waited for two years for you to come back. So many people don't even i come /i back from the program! How could you return to New York and not even drop me a fucking hello? Yeah, I'm such an asshole for wanting to see the woman I i loved /i , only to find out she doesn't even think about me anymore. I mean, how could she when she's fucking a three piece suit?" She winced as my grip on her arm tightend with my angry outburst. I let her go after seeing the look on her face. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it would explode. These questions had followed me since I had heard of her return. I knew that if she wanted to see me, she'd come. But she never did... and it had started to eat me alive.

"I... I'm-" Her defenses began to fall.

"You're what? Let me guess, you're sorry? No Alex, i I'm /i sorry. I'm sorry I gave you five years of my life. I'm counting the two years you were gone too because I was a mess without you," I confess, why hold back?

"I was too Olivia-"

"Yeah, I can see that. I waited for you to come to me. I wanted you to get settled and feel at home before I jumped in. But you didn't settle back into your life, you started a new one!"

"I had to!" She shouted in my face, tears threatening her eyes. She looked around and lowered her voice, "Dammit Olivia, you have no idea what it was like for me. I came back and I wasn't part of the 1-6 anymore. I had to start from scratch. I have a new job with new co-workers. They wanted me here because they knew after everything I was through, I could handle this office." For a lawyer, her arguements weren't very persuasive.

"It's the political agenda then, huh?" I stepped closer to her. We were inches apart as I spoke my low, angry accusations. I could feel the heat eminating between our bodies. It was killing me, even in all my anger.

"God, no!" She protested but it was too obvious to deny.

"Hello? Do you remember when you came back for the trial? Do you even remember that Alexandra?" She was still the same Alex then. She was sad, scared and craving home but she was still the same Alex I had fallen for years before. I stepped an inch closer. "You made love to me and promised that no one would ever take that place in your heart. That was the last time I touched you... the last time I held you. That woman is gone. Maybe she was just dying slowly from there on. This..." I looked her up and down, wanting to kiss her and slap her at the same time. "I don't even know this person anymore."

"Olivia please," Alex was actually crying now. Her mascara drew grey lines down her rosey cheeks.

"No one could've loved that woman more than I did. No one will ever treat her exactly the way she deserves because no one can appreciate what I saw and knew about her. Why don't you tell her that, if you ever see her again." I ended bitterly. She leaned against the wall behind her and I took her in for minute before turning to leave. I fled to the same stairs she had watched i that man /i run down, not twenty minutes before me. I felt her eyes pleading and burning into the skin on my back as the tables had turned, and now I was the one walking away.