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Disclaimer: I do not own 'The Zeta Project'. I do not own any of its characters. It's just a fanfiic.
A/N Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
I'm sorry I didn't manage to post this Christmas Zee/Ro story in time, but I hope you will read it!
As English isn't my native language, I want to thank Aldebaran8423 for her editing help on this story.
Taste of Freedom
by Iglika
Ro's point of view
What could we say to each other now? In front of all these cameras, in front of all these people in the live audience and at home in front of their vid monitors? It was crazy. I would never have agreed to this madness if it wasn't my only chance to see Zee again.
Yes, it was just a chance for me to see Zee again since the NSA took him from me the day Agent Bennet and Dr. Selig proved his innocence. "A shock" is not the right word for the horror Zee and I experienced at that moment. No one since had been able to set Zee truly free. Not because he could be dangerous; Agent Bennet and Dr. Selig provided evidence that Zee was peaceful and that his conscience would guarantee he would never harm anyone, like any law abiding person, but because there was no precedent for it - a synthoid had no right to be an ordinary citizen, at least until society would be ready to accept him. Obviously some people had paid no attention to the little fact that my brother is a journalist. They were in his territory now – where society's mind was educated and shaped. Casey seemed much more meek than me, but that was definitely an illusion. He was a Rowen. He promised me he'd get Zee set free. And I believed him. He would do the impossible, especially since Skye offered him an exclusive Christmas 'Skye's the Limit' show which would tell the truth of Zee's story.
But still…I had my fears and doubts…I couldn't even dare to hope that Zee would find his freedom. I could only live in the now, and see this as my only chance to see Zee, for many months or even years in the foreseeable future.
What could we say to each other now? In front of all these cameras, in front of all these people in the audience and in front of their vid monitors? 'Hello, Zee'? 'Hello, Ro'? 'How have you been?' Useless words. The world had stopped turning since we were separated. And the only thing we could try to do now was prolong the seconds of this short meeting.
We still stood immovable on the both sides of the stage, unable to make even one more step, staring at each other…
Back when we were running, after our every separation, I always ran to Zee and hugged him, even if he was in his synthoid form. What was the difference now? All these cameras and all these people? Zee had to know nothing had changed for me. I had to do this now, exactly now, in front of all these gazes fixed on us; now, when a tall, handsome man with a disobedient black forelock and sad navy-blue eyes craved to be acknowledged as a real person.
I ran to him, he opened his arms; I hugged him tight, pressing my face against his chest, huddling in his embrace.
As one person, the audience let go a sigh of satisfaction. Although their reaction was absolutely positive, it made us let go of each other with embarrassment.
Casey and Skye immediately invited us to sit in the chairs next to them and began asking all the prepared questions, which would reveal the truth about Zee's struggle for freedom. Zee answered, I answered, our statements were verified with interviews Casey and Skye had done with Agent Bennet, Dr. Selig and most of the people Zee had saved or helped, but even though my brother managed secretly to give me signs that everything was going perfectly well, it was like I wasn't able to realize it. The only thing I knew was the time I had with Zee was inescapably expiring. The set and the blinding light of the spotlights on us, the unknown people beyond the lights with their unhidden support made everything unreal, like a dream which is too perfect to be true, because I knew that besides those kind people, there were others behind the lights who hated Zee and waited to take him from me again.
Two of them, with grey uniforms and stone faces, appeared behind Zee.
We stood up. It was time for Zee to leave, he wasn't allowed to stay while Casey and Skye explained to the audience and the TV viewers how to vote for Zee's freedom. And if the voting didn't turn out the way we all hoped, I didn't know when or if I would see Zee again…
No matter the two agents behind him, Zee wasn't ready to leave yet. He didn't want to. The way I didn't want to. It was a new moment of silence, much harder than at the beginning. It was a moment of stillness. A moment of electrifying tension. There were no cameras, people or agents around us. We looked at each other. It was about us, only us. We both knew it wasn't the right place or the right time, we both knew it was ridiculous, preposterous, outrageous…but coupled with the thought that probably we would never meet again, it was stronger than both of us. His gaze moved to my mouth and I looked at his lips too. It was a moment of burning sincerity. I wanted to feel the taste of his lips and he wanted to savor mine. Neither of us made the first move -- we did it at the same time. The instant he bent over me, I lifted on my tiptoes and I sensed his lips on mine. They were soft, so soft and so tender, but my lips…I felt how they stuck on his…my lips were sticky, because of the lipstick…I didn't use make-up, but Skye's team insisted, because of the lights and the cameras…I didn't know…I…I had no idea that this lipstick will make my lips so sticky…oh, no…what he would think now…this stupid lipstick was colorless, probably he hadn't even noticed that I wore it at all …now he would be disgusted, he would be disappointed by the weird waxy feel of my lips…The long ago forgotten shadow of his kiss with Tiffy made me even more ashamed. Now he would compare my kiss with hers and he would be unmoved…
Zee drew back from me, he tried an encouraging farewell smile, but his eyes remained sad, so sad…
I had no time to explain, no time to think, I wasn't able to hear or process the audience's reaction to what they saw, I only tried a smile too, but I was on the verge of tears…
Escorted by the agents, Zee made his way toward the backstage. Before the curtains hid him, he looked at me over his shoulder and for a long second I couldn't see anything else except his eyes, his navy blue eyes, so alive and so sad…
Zee crossed the line of the spotlights and I lost him from my sight.
He had gone.
I had lost him.
Again.
And maybe this time it was forever.
The tears rolled down my face, but that didn't matter.
Nothing mattered without Zee.
I didn't care if the audience, the cameras, the TV viewers or the agents who took Zee saw me crying.
Come and see me!
I can't hide my love for Zee anymore. Yes, I love him--a synthoid.
Come and stigmatize me! It doesn't matter.
Nothing matters without Zee.
Nothing…
I knew I had to wait on the set for the result of the voting, but I couldn't stay here anymore. Somewhere in the back of my mind a small voice tried to tell me that under stress people make unimportant things important, that this lipstick thing was inconsequential, but even if it was true, it wasn't enough to stop me. Things had gone wrong, I made a mistake, I made a mess of our last minute together and I couldn't allow Zee to remember me that way. He had wanted to kiss me, he had kissed me and he was disappointed by the feel of my lips. I had ruined the most precious moment between us. I had ruined the moment I was waiting for all those years!
I ran toward the backstage, I had to find a way to see him again, or at least to talk to him…just five minutes…
He's still at his dressing room? Okay, okay, the agents wouldn't let me in…Then what? I have to talk to him! I have to talk to him! There is an intercom and I can talk to him from my dressing room? In private? It doesn't matter that it's audio only; it's enough if we could talk…Okay, thank you…
I ran to my dressing room, I locked the door, I turned off the sound of the screen which was airing Skye's show and the vote and I spoke into the intercom.
"Zee? Are you there? Skye's team told me we could talk in private for a while."
"Yes, Ro, I'm here. What's wrong? Are you okay?" Zee's deep, velvet voice couldn't hide his anxiety.
"Yes, I'm okay. Actually…no, I…I'm not…" I stammered and shook my head in helpless anger. I was lucky there was no vid and Zee couldn't see my perplexed expression. "I need to tell you something."
"Yes?" he asked and I recognized the warm notes of his endless understanding and willingness to help me and give me all he had and all he was.
"A few minutes ago… I mean… when we had to separate… I didn't expect that you… that we… I…I wore lipstick and… it turned out to be too… sticky…" I silenced before I died of embarrassment.
"Yes, I noticed. My lips are still sticky." He sounded amused, but there was only gentleness in his voice. It was just like him, trying to show me that there was no need for me to be worried…
"I had no idea it would be like that… you know I don't use such things. It was because of the show…I mean…Skye's team insisted…"
"There's no need to apologize. I like it."
"You do?!?"
"Yes, I do. It reminds me of you. I know it won't remain forever, but it's good to have the taste of your lips on mine at least for a while." His velvet, deep toned voice was serious and warm and I knew he was sincere.
I wasn't merely relieved, I was myself again, as always when I was with him.
"Am I insane to talk about lipstick when this could be our last conversation? I forgot again--I'm insane. I've always been." I tried to cover my nervousness behind a joke…if it was a joke at all…
"No, Ro, you're not," he said softly. "You are just an endless optimist. Remember what you told me when we thought Dr. Selig was dead and there was no longer any hope for me to find my freedom? You said: 'We'll find a way'. Deep inside of you, you don't believe this is our last conversation. You still believe we'll find a way."
"You're probably right." I used his favorite words without hiding a smile.
"I love to know that you are smiling, Ro," he said, a smile in his voice, too.
"Okay, that got much too sappy." This time I used one of my favorite expressions. I was sure he wouldn't be hurt by this as he already knew I was kidding him.
"You really are my rose, Ro. Always that prickly tenderness…"
I giggled. "So should I buy lipstick with a rose flavor, or maybe strawberry?"
"No, I prefer the taste of your lips the way they are."
"You can taste? You're able to taste? I didn't know…"
"You never asked me."
"Well, umm, since you can't eat I thought… never mind. So what's the taste of my lips?"
"The taste of freedom. Even if this voting changes nothing, I'll find a way to be acknowledged as a free person and I'll come back to you. I love you, Ro. My life doesn't mean anything without you."
A wild exaltation in the audience on the screen stopped my answer—people were standing up! They looked like they were…cheering?
"Zee? Can you see that? What's going on?"
"I'm not sure, unless…I think they heard us! I'm sorry, Ro. I didn't know our conversation would be heard on the speakers in the auditorium…"
"Ro!" Casey knocked on my door. "Open up and come, quickly!"
When I unlocked the door, I saw a grinning Casey who took me by the hand and ran with me toward the stage where Skye had just brought Zee…without any agents around him…
"A technical mistake made a miracle for these two!" Skye announced to the audience, showing Zee and me with a large gesture. "The voting in the entire country went completely in Zee's favor, but now there's really no doubt for anyone how deep and true his heart is! The country has shown it's ready to welcome this incredible man – the man Zee Smith! The voting shows – Zee has the right to be free and live among us!"
Skye kept speaking, the audience kept applauding, the spotlights kept blinding us, there were live interviews from all over the country, but the only thing I was able to realize was Zee's arm around my shoulders and my arm around his waist. We kept standing there, on the set, smiling, trying to comprehend that everything was real.
There was a caption on the big vid screen in the studio – "A happy ending of a true story at Christmas". They were wrong, though. I looked at Zee and in his smiling navy-blue eyes I read the same – they were wrong. It was the happy beginning of a true story at Christmas.
The end
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year again! Please, please review!