Feeding like this was something I did when I wasn't in a rush. It served two purposes for me. Primarily it connected me to Katherine, helped me to remember the time we spent together, when she taught me how to catch prey, before she turned me into this. Secondly, it gave me time to think. I usually wasn't one for letting my thoughts get to me, in fact I often actively shut them out with drinking binges (alcohol or blood, either worked well enough for a time), but sometimes I needed to process them so I could focus. Tonight was one of those nights.
It seemed like every time I returned to this damn town my humanity got dialled up a notch. Maybe it was being so close to where I was truly human or maybe it was how much more I missed Katherine while I was here, but either way it was frustrating. I had a plan needing my full attention and right now my thoughts about her were distracting me. So here I lay on the road, letting memories of Katherine fill me up, allowing myself to miss her while waiting for my next meal.
The problem with thinking about Katherine is that it always leads to thoughts about Stefan. And how annoying it has been waiting for him to return home just so I could begin the next part of my plan. I don't actually need him to help me, but be damned if I was going to set foot in Mystic Falls before he did. After what happened in '53 I ALWAYS let Stefan come home first (not that it helped me out much in '94 but you can't win them all), I wasn't going to be the one to run into any of our vindictive bastard nephews without the golden boy softening them up first. Ugh, I hate thinking about Stefan, it's so damn depressing. I forcefully channel my thoughts back to Katherine, it's not difficult, every moment is burned into my brain like it was yesterday.
I can hear the sounds of a party nearby and I know it won't be long before the first few lightweights leave their fun and mine begins. Drunk teenagers are easy pickings for my snatch, eat, erase method, perfect for keeping a low profile. At least until I know what's going on around the town. And the extra buzz doesn't hurt either. The sounds the rowdy teenagers make are background noise and aren't enough to distract me from my thoughts, but I must be missing Katherine more than I realised because I swear I just heard her voice!
"I know Bonnie, you're right, you and my mum both are, I just can't bring myself to tell him, at least not tonight. I'll call you later."
Okay, WTF. How is this even possible? Am I hallucinating here? "Katherine…" She doesn't even seem to recognise me. What new mind game is this? Fuck it, I don't care, I've missed her so much I don't care how she is standing right here.
"Uh, no, I…" Why did she turn around behind her, surely she knows I'm talking to her, "I'm Elena." I didn't think it was possible but I am even more confused than I was ten seconds ago. What the hell is going on here? Her eyes are too soft, her manner too open, and her mouth…. not a hint of a smirk. Can this be possible? Is this really not her? I don't know what I am more afraid of, this really being Katherine and not being able to tell or this not being her and having my renewed hope destroyed. I swear I can hear a heartbeat… she is human! Oh crap, how long have I been staring here like a moron? Say something you idiot!
"Oh, you… you just look… I'm sorry, you just really remind me of someone. I'm Damon." Oh yeah, real smooth. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut.
"Not to be rude or anything Damon, but it's kind of creepy that you're out here in the middle of nowhere." Um, yeah. Especially since I was planning on eating you. Uh, was? Where did that come from? Just because she looks like Katherine doesn't mean I can't eat her… Ah dammit, I'm doing it again!
"You're one to talk. You're out here all by yourself." OMG, am I trying to make her walk away? Genius move that one, point out that she's all alone with a stranger. Just stop talking and eat her already.
"It's Mystic Falls, nothing bad ever happens here." Oh, honey. That's just too cute. You have no freaking idea do you? "Got into a fight with my boyfriend." Hmm, interesting. Maybe I can eat him instead…
"About what? May I ask?" Why am I still talking to her? Just eat! But my body is refusing to respond. Since when does my vamp have performance anxiety?
"Life, future, he's got it all mapped out." Seriously? Teenagers haven't got a clue do they?
"You don't want it?" Why do I care? Surely it's just the Katherine of it all, but I just can't seem to help myself. I really am enjoying talking to this girl, I don't think I can eat her. What is wrong with me?
"I don't know what I want."
"Well that's not true. You want what everybody wants." Me.
"What? A mysterious stranger who has all the answers?" Exactly.
"Ha. Well let's just say I've been around a long time, I've learned a few things." Like not to talk to my food. Why am I still here?
"So Damon, tell me, what is it that I want?" Still me. Even my own thoughts have it in for me tonight. And my body is joining in the betraying it seems as it moves towards her of its own accord.
"You want a love that consumes you, you want passion, and adventure, and even a little danger." Now I'm standing right in front of her. She is all I can smell, and the sound of that pulse is sending shivers throughout my body. Oh yes, definitely human.
"So, what do you want?" Um, what just happened here? I was too caught up in my senses being overwhelmed by her that I almost missed her question. How did a human girl just render me completely speechless? I honestly have no clue how to answer her, no one has ever asked me that before.
"Uh." What the hell is wrong with me tonight? Why did I just have the overwhelming urge to answer with a simple: You? Just the thought is a complete betrayal of everything I am, I am here for Katherine, not some look alike. Get it together Salvatore.
I'm suddenly jolted from my own horribly confused thoughts by the honk of a car horn. "It's my parents."
While she's distracted by the car I step in close to fix this situation before it gets any further out of hand. I'll just compel her and get away before that car shows up.
"I want you to get everything you're looking for, but right now I want you to forget that this happened. Can't have people knowing I'm in town yet. Goodnight Elena." My answer even surprised me. The compulsion was all I had planned but something about this girl just drove me to give her a little piece of me before she could forget I ever existed. I vamp out of sight but stay near, I can't help but watch her as she leaves. For some reason I feel sad that she will never remember this night and it bothers me. I don't understand why, but as I walk away I know that this is a new memory added to those permanently burned into my brain.