"No, mom I don't want to meet anyone okay! Stop trying to set me up with some guy that's your co-worker's son. No- No I really do not care if he's a nice young man with a lot of similar interests to me, you say that about every single guy. I don't want a relationship right now, it's not a priority to me. I'm only 23 I'm not going to die without getting married."
My vision is hazy.
"Mom, just drop the matter okay? Please you are literally making the task of driving more difficult than necessary. What? Yes I'm talking to you while driving. No it's not on the phone I have you on speaker right now."
Is this a dream?
"I'm on my way, going through the gorge right now. Yes I'm being careful around the bends have a little faith in my driving abilities please."
I can't tell.
"Mom I can not understand what you're saying, the connection is starting to break up. Mom? Ok good you're still there, I'm still here we're doing just great."
This is surreal.
"I should be over in time for dinner. Tell 'K' to not eat all the-OH MY GOD!"
There's something in the road, shrouded in a fog. I, me, she- runs off the road to avoid it. Wrong direction though.
"Ah! No shit, shit, shit! U-mph
Loss of Service, loss of service, loss of service, loss of-
Mom?
Mom? Oh g-god I'm bleeding… so close to the edge, Mom? Mom?!"
Black. Black, black, black, black. No more haze just nothing but the color that is no color. And then there's the water. It's all around. Churning, gurgling, dragging, stealing the air. A scream. A cry for help. Choking, burning lungs, and the endless black sight spanning for what feels like eons in a second. Eons in a second... Eons in a second...
A strong arm, a tug, the blinding illumination of something not black. Compression, ringing, crying. Dying. Dying, dying, dying, dying. Light, pain, more choking, more crying. A familiarly unfamiliar face, two, no three. Gasping. A hug, the feeling of water running down my skin, soggy clothes clinging to me like a leaden weight. And a single word repeating over and over again. A single word. A noun. My name. My name is-
"Ame, what is it honey? You're just staring at the water," Mama places a hand tentatively on my shoulder. I don't blink or move, just remain where I am, calmly invested in the motionless water in the bowl.
"I'm trying to remember Mama," My voice is high pitched, childish. I don't remember my voice always sounding like this. I could have sworn once it was a bit deeper, somewhat rougher and more challenging in personality. Was that just a dream I had? Papa says that when people drown they dream. It must have been a dream.
But it felt real.
"What are you trying to remember honey?" Mama sits down next to me and pulls me into her lap. I bob a little as she settles down more. Her thin hands that I've come to find are pale, not a golden color like I always thought they were, start to run through my long dark hair. My hair is strange. It's long, very long, almost to my waist long. I think I didn't like the short hairstyle that all the girls in my family like. It's also brown, but so dark that it's almost as black as the far shores themselves. Mama combs this hair with her fingers, maybe braiding some of it.
"I'm trying to remember…," It's on the tip of my tongue. I know what it is I want to remember, but I can't get the words to come out of my mouth.
"Go on baby, what are you trying to remember?" Mama starts making the braids bigger, weaving many of them together at once. The water remains still. I wonder if I move it I can say what I mean? I lean forward and touch the surface with hands tinier than I recall, but have already become accustomed to.
Tiny ripples shimmer underneath and away from my pointer finger.
"I'm trying to remember my name."
Mama stops braiding my hair. I look up confused. "Mama?"
Her eyes, pretty doe eyes with deep chocolate colors swirling around and around, are filling with tears. A frown tugs at my little lips. I don't like to see Mama cry. She's too sweet for tears. If a porcelain doll cries does it ruin their face? I think Mama's like a porcelain doll with her looks. But has Mama always been a porcelain doll? I'm not sure anymore.
"Oh honey," Mama whispers sadly.
"Ame! Come away from the edge sweetheart," Papa's large hand wraps around mine and tugs me away from the railing of the stone bridge we are crossing. Underneath it is a stream that flows at a gentle trickle. I think Papa is still afraid of me being around running water. I should probably be afraid of it too, but I'm not. The water is keeping something from me. I know it.
"Ame, tell me about yourself again, please?" Papa is being weird again. Just like Mama. He asks me to tell him about myself, and makes little odd comments here and there about it. I think he tells Mama and makes her worry more.
"My name is Ameida and I'm six twenty-three. I am a member of the Hiroshi clan, we can do this thing called shapeshifting right Papa?" I look up at Papa and his perplexed expression. He nods but I know that's not the word I'm supposed to use. Papa has pale skin too, like Mama. And his hair is the same color as mine. I could have sworn he had honey and sand colors in his hair though. And his eyes are like Aspen bark, even warping slightly as bark does with different hues of the grey-beige colors. Not blue like the early evening.
I continue with my story. "We're supposed to be spies, especially because of the war. I like reading, and I help other kids read too. I've got a bitty brother named Kalani. Mama named him after a Hawaiian word that means 'The Heaven Sky' I think. And a cousin named Rikuro. He plays with me all the time."
"Where did you say that Mama and I came from?"
I tilt my head back and look at the sky. The clouds are out today. All nice and puffy like little cotton balls, moving gently in the wind as if they were sea swells. It's a nice day. The sun shines down and warms me to my toes.
"Mama came from the Hawaii Islands and you came from Germany. But somewhere along the lines you both decided to come live here!" I giggle and throw my hands up in the air. Papa sighs. I don't think he likes my answer again.
"Papa, where are we going?" I don't really mind that I'm going somewhere. Going anywhere with Papa is fun. He carries me on his shoulders and runs around. I like feeling the wind stream through my hair. It makes me feel like a spirit with the way my hair flies behind me.
"Remember where Papa said he goes to get jobs?" he asks. I chirp in response and he keeps talking. "I have some friends there that I want you to meet. They might be able to help you with your memory."
Papa and Mama say there's something wrong with my memory. I tell them things that they've never heard of before. Things that don't exist here. They said I don't have a little brother. There's no such places like Germany and Hawaii. It confuses me, just like how Papa and Mama's colors do. But the fact that I still remember things about myself confuses them. I'm a jumbled mess of me and me.
Papa takes a shortcut through the trees. Well, I say a shortcut but it still takes us awhile before we hit what must be the main road. And before long I spot a giant fortress (really it's just a gate but it's fun to imagine it's something else) looming on the road ahead.
"Welcome to Konohagakure, Ame," Papa says smugly. I lean forward in excitement. We wave to some men guarding the gates and head deeper into the village. Some people shout out Papa's name (Kouhei) and wave hello to him. I rest my chin on his head, soaking in the warm rays of the sun, and the sweet scent of his hair.
We round a bend and pass a school. Perking up, I stretch to see if I can see any other kids. There's a bunch of them out in the courtyard. Some look like they're playing, others look like they're training. I wonder if, when we're done talking with Papa's friends, I can go play with them? I don't get to play with a lot of people, and Rikuro is big enough that he has to go do training.
The school disappears and Papa stops in front of a flower shop. Vibrant colors bloom outside and inside, filling up most of the space. Different aromas waft around and make the area feel alive with refreshing scents. The sign above the store reads: YAMANAKA.
"My friend Inoichi runs this shop, but he's also very skilled with things concerning the mind," Papa says. He gets down on the ground and I slide off of his shoulders. He takes my hand and we walk side by side into the shop. I happily breathe in the scent of the flowers. They smell like they've just been watered. A voice, a man, calls from the back to say that he'll be out in just a minute.
My hand slips out of Papa's and I skip to look at some of the flowers. The man from the back shuffles out and greets Papa warmly. For a little bit they talk in low whispers, no doubt about me. I don't really like it when adults do that. Or kids. Well, anyone I suppose. It's kind of rude in my opinion.
Then Papa's friend walks over to me and kneels down so he's on my level. I turn to look at him, a man with long platinum gold hair and clear blue eyes. His appearance strikes me as familiar, but I know I've never met this man before. Maybe Papa's descriptions are just that good?
"Hello Ame. My name is Yamanaka Inoichi, it's a pleasure to meet you. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?" His voice is soft, like he thinks he will frighten me away if he talks too loudly. Normally I don't mind when adults do this, but for some reason a part of me bristles at the way he speaks. It's not a pleasant feeling, so I ignore it and nod my head.
"Your father tells me that you have problems remembering some things. What kind of things?"
I bite my lip. If I tell him he's going to be worried like Mama and Papa. I don't like the looks of worried people. It makes it seem like I'm crazy. But if I don't tell him then Papa and Mama will never stop worrying.
"It's hard to remember my name sometimes," I shrug. "And I can't remember some things before my, um, accident. And sometimes I remember things that aren't mine."
That last little bit slipped out without meaning to. Inoichi's head tilts to the left in slight concern.
"What do you mean you remember things that aren't yours?"
I start to fidget, looking down at my feet and finding the ground more interesting than Inoichi's clear gaze. "I remember a little brother, and lands that don't exist, and…"
Falling down much farther than from a stone into a river.
My chest starts to hurt. It's like I'm back in the water, the air being stolen from my greedy lungs. I'm trapped.
Inoichi senses that something is bothering me, so he quickly explains that he's just going to take a peek into my mind just so he can see what's going on. He won't do anything else, he promises. His hands fly wildly as he makes hand gestures and then he's pressing his thumb against my forehead. I stare blankly at him, and his expression changes from neutrality to confusion to perturbed in a matter of moments. When he's finished he pulls away and moves back over to Papa.
I don't wanna be here anymore.
"Papa, can I go over to the school and see if someone will play?" I ask. I'm not sure he heard me, but he nods his head so I skip out of the flower shop and down the road. At the school yard gate I stand and look for someone to play with.
I see a group of three standing by a tree. Two boys appear to be arguing with each other while a girl frantically mediates between them. Altogether they don't look to be much older than me by a couple of years, like Rikuro. One of the boys has white, spiky hair; a scarf is wrapped around his neck although it's a little warm for that kind of clothing. The other one has soft looking black hair, and he has some goggles on his head. He points angrily at the white haired boy and it clicks in my mind that I have seen this boy before. It's a nostalgic feeling, like I know much, much more about him than my own mind is letting on.
A wave of happiness crashes into me and I grin. Before I know what's going on I'm running towards the trio, tackling the black haired boy to the ground. My chest starts to vibrate and I purr. The only thing on my mind is that he's alive and happy.
But who is he?
"Oi! G-get off of me!" The boy wiggles and I cling to his shirt while he stands. I'm still small enough that it makes me very light, even for someone not much older than me. He spins around trying to find me, only making himself dizzy in the process. Finally the white haired boy grabs the back of my geisha and pulls me off, setting me back on the ground but keeping his hand close in case he needs to do it again. (Silly him.)
"Um, are you lost little girl?" The girl, with her pretty short hair and purple striped cheeks, bends down and smiles kindly. I shake my head, that cute little grin of mine still intact.
"Nope! I just wanna play," I throw my hands up in the air and twirl. I think I've got them confused, but it's alright.
The white haired boy huffs. "If you're not attending the academy then you shouldn't be here."
"Oh don't be such a stiff Kakashi. She's just a little kid, and if she wants to play let her," The boy with black hair crouches and gives me a lopsided grin. "My name's Obito, Uchiha Obito. The jerk over there is Hatake Kakashi."
The white haired boy mutters something about being able to introduce himself on his own.
"And I'm Nohara Rin," The girl, Rin, kneels down. "What's your name?"
I'm about to answer when I feel this clicking in my head. Their names...I know them. A flash, and I'm seeing things I've never seen before. The three of them are a little older, about graduation age I suppose. They go on all kinds of missions together, become friends sort of, grow up together just a little.
"You guys are going to be a genin team," I say with wide eyes. Rin blinks in surprise and backs away slightly. Obito begins to question and protest. Kakashi silently judges like always. Like always? What does that mean?
A deep sigh escapes me, and with it that dreadful feeling of water filling my chest comes back. It's quick and and demanding, overtaking my entire being. I teeter and turn around. I've gotta get back to Papa!
How does one drown on land with no water in sight? It's simply not possible now is it? Yet that's what I feel happening to me. Like when I fell into the river behind our estate, down that terrifying height. All that murky dark taking my sight. Eons in a second… I think those kids are calling to me, I don't know. Hearing is like listening to half the words reach you through water. I can't breathe.
My foot slips and I fall into the dirt. I curl in on myself and wish for everything to go away. I don't like this. It's so scary! Papa! Papa!
"Ame!" I open my eyes and become engulfed in blinding sunlight. Papa wavers in my vision. Hands turn me on my side and pound against my back, stinging. The obstruction I feel in my lungs, the water, it rushes out and I cough it up. Someone gasps in shock. My head hangs limp and I heave. There just doesn't seem to be enough air. There never is.
"Kouhei, I'll do whatever it is you need me to," Inoichi, I guess he's here too, says with a hint of distress. I don't catch what Papa says, falling into a more peaceful darkness that wraps a blanket around me, telling me to sleep.
I don't question it, and do as it says.
[TD]: Hey~o Koniax here! I've been holding onto this idea for a very long time (a couple years to be exact) to put this idea into action and I'm very excited to share it with you guys! I know that this just sounds like another one of those rebirth stories (and to be honest that is what it originally started out as) but I promise it's not. I'm going to be playing around with some ideas that I've picked up along the way and hopefully they'll be intriguing enough for people to read about. So if you wouldn't mind sending me your thoughts then that'd be hella cool ٩(•́‿•́)۶ And I apologize if sometimes it looks like the sentences get cut short and then start up randomly, for some reason it's been doing that when I copy and paste and it's pretty annoying (also apologize for spelling mistakes, I'll eventually get around to fixing those).
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, all credits belong to Kishimoto-sensei on the matter. (I simply own the pretty obvious OCs.) And I don't own the cover picture either, I just found it on Pinterest and it didn't have an artist name/link, but if anyone finds out who it belongs to I'll be sure to give credit or take it down in case the artist doesn't want it to be used commercially or anything.
With that out of the way, enjoy! ;)~