lol. I came up with this idea while thinking about Moulin Rouge and the Elephant Scene. At first, I wanted to use a Sesshoumaru/Kagome coupling, but then I figured, what would be better than a shy, purely embarrassed Inuyasha on his wedding night? Besides, Inuyasha is a whole heckuva lot easier to write about. I'll be updating this story whenever my other one "Three Blades" gets me depressed and I need to vent out my humor on something. So… Please enjoy!
Chapter ONE
Preparations and rumors of the "Wedding Night"
Kagome turned a full circle before the full-length mirror, her pure white wedding gown flowing about her as she spun.
"It's absolutely beautiful, Sango!" Kagome cried out in delight.
Her best friend extended her hands to Kagome, taking her well-manicured ones into hers, as she gave her a big smile.
"No," Sango spoke, shaking her head, though careful not to mess up the fifty dollar arrangement on top of her head, "You are truly beautiful, Kagome."
Blushing, Kagome giggled, hugging her best friend tight, though careful not to squeeze too hard due to the roundness forming about her stomach.
"You look beautiful, too, Sango," Kagome insisted, "You have the mother's aura around already!"
Sango laughed as she stroked her round tummy.
"Right I do," she spoke, slowly shaking her head with her eyes closed, "That houshi seems pretty damn proud of it too, you know. You know how many times we stopped today on the way to the dressing rooms?"
"Talking about your father-giddy husband again, Sango?" Rin called as she entered the dressing room.
Sango nodded as she continued.
"Twenty-three times!" she exclaimed, "I have no idea how Miroku gets it into his head that complete strangers want to hear about our child."
Kagome and Rin both laughed as the dressing room door opened again, and Kagura stepped in, slightly out of breath.
"Kagome, I'm sorry I'm late," she rushed as she joined the rest of the ladies in the dressing room while they all gave her knowing looks, "My goodness!" she cried when she saw Kagome, "Kagome! You look like a princess!"
Rin giggled.
"What were you doing Kagura-chan?" she questioned her friend, feigning innocence, "Or my I correctly ask, Who were you doing?"
The three girls burst into laughter at the slightly older woman.
Kagura frowned.
"Come on, guys," she said, her brows furrowing, "Cut it out…" she looked pointedly at Rin, the youngest of the three and her favorite, "Especially you, young lady."
Rin lightly curtsied at her elder, and then skipped away from her to stand next to Kagome. The bride walked over to the wall where a dress bag was hanging on a hook.
"Here are your bridesmaid dresses!" she exclaimed, pulling the dresses out from their protective covering.
Sango, Rin, and Kagura gasped. They were more beautiful than Kagome had described.
Kagome passed each respective woman her dress as the three profusely began to thank her in return.
Embarrassed, Kagome waved her arms in front of her, trying to tell them to stop thanking her and try on the dresses. Each woman, giggling like little girls, ran to a small stall and began changing.
"Wow, Kagome-chan!" Sango called from her stall, "You actually got my size right. How did you do it?"
Kagome giggled from her spot outside, "Oh you know, a certain favorite houshi of ours did a little bit of measuring while you were out cold. Besides, years of shopping together did do something to help."
Sango groaned as the other three ladies burst into spits of laughter.
Pretty soon, each woman stepped out of their stall and began examining each other and themselves in the full-length mirror. Their dresses were of a lustrous deep red cloth, sleeveless, but had a silver ribbon tied about the waist that ended with the dress itself, barely above the floor. Silver against deep red. Inuyasha's colors.
"Wow," Rin spoke, amazed at her own reflection, "These dresses are absolutely gorgeous."
Kagome could only smile and laugh as Sango, Rin, and Kagura gave her hugs and kisses on the cheek.
---
MEANWHILE, in the men's dressing room, the men's conversation was going quite different. Yes… quite different.
"WHAT THE HELL?" Inuyasha screamed in outrage as he tore open a small package out of its wrapping paper to reveal a package of condoms. 2X SMALL condoms, to be precise.
The three other men lounging about the room burst into laughter, even a certain older silver-haired male cracked a smile. Inuyasha glared at them all, but sent special razor sharp daggers at a certain male with a perverted smile playing on his lips.
"Mi-ro-ku," the groom-to-be growled.
The Miroku pursed his lips together in effort to stop laughing while another male, who a doubling over with laughter, continued to howl with laughter. The smirk never left Sesshoumaru's face.
Inuyasha only continued to get more annoyed and angrier.
"There is no fucking way I am this small!" he proclaimed to the rest of the men in the room, only to cause them to burst into more fits of laughter.
Minutes later, Miroku was able to regain self-composure and straightened up to look his friend in the eye.
"Inuyasha," he spoke with a suspicious twinkle in his eyes. Inuyasha did not like that look. "You could always just go without it. This is just a gag gift."
Sesshoumaru brought from his own soft chuckling, frowned.
"Miroku, you shouldn't have done that. It was much more amusing seeing him fret like so."
The elder of the two brothers looked over to the fourth of their party member with a bored expression.
"Will you stop laughing, Kouga? It's getting on my nerves."
Kouga, now on the ground from laughing so much, sat up, still sputtering from laughter.
Inuyasha glared.
"That's right you mangy wolf. I bet you're smaller than me, anyways."
Sesshoumaru nodded his head as though he were extremely fond of his younger half-brother.
"True… but that wouldn't matter either way…" Sesshoumaru opened his eyes. A glint of evil laughter shone in his amber orbs. "Inuyasha is a… virgin."
A noise erupted from the occupants of the room as Miroku almost flew ten feet away from the now beet-red Inuyasha and Kouga fell to the ground with hysterical laughter again.
"OH MY GOD! INUYASHA? A VIRGIN?"
"SESSHOUMARU!"
"WAHAHAHAHA! STUPID HAHA DOG TURD HAHAHHAHA IS A VIR-HAHA VIRR-HAHAHAHA!"
"What?"
Inuyasha was glaring at his elder brother, which Sesshoumaru casually ignored.
"I was only telling the truth."
It was a good ten minutes before all the laughter completely died down, even though Kouga still had spits of hysterical laughter from time to time. Inuyasha was still over-blushing. He looked nervous. Something his perverted friend noticed and immediately took advantage of it.
"OY. Inuyasha," he spoke, calmly walking up to him, "You're not nervous about tonight, are you?"
Inuyasha's golden eyes met his best friend's. Yup, he was definitely nervous.
"I… uh…" his eyes quickly flickered away as he swallowed a gulp of air, "What am I supposed to do anyways?"
Suddenly, before anyone had realized it, Kouga was on his feet again, a perverted smirk of his own was displayed on his face.
"If you need someone to show you, dog-breath, I would be more than obliging to demonstrate for you with Kagome-chan."
At this, Inuyasha growled with anger as he lunged for Kouga, barely missing him as Miroku simply grabbed onto the back of his shirt and Kouga lightly bounded across the room, laughing.
Sesshoumaru gave them a bored look as he glanced at his watch.
"Kouga, would you kindly stop enraging my brother?" he stood, "We need to start getting ready."
Each man took up his tuxedo in their respective bags and went to their respective stalls to change.
However, before Inuyasha could close the door to his stall, a proud, taunting voice floated its way over the stall walls.
"Remember, Inuyasha-kun, I got her on my first try."