A/N: Got really bored one time and came up with this. I was actually gonna do this for another site since this is quite a popular trend there (except there, the kids are actually supposed to be nice and cute...stupid cutesy asians! LOL jkjk), but then I thought...why not change it around? So...here you are! Hope you like it...and remember, reviews are love! :D (and I don't own Sweeney Todd!)

Chapter 1

We see SWEENEY TODD and MRS. LOVETT walking with paper bags in their hands. They have just finished shopping for supplies for their shops. While they are walking, MRS. LOVETT is blabbering away while SWEENEY TODD stays quiet as he stares into space and ignores the woman. As the woman continues to talk about whatever it is she's talking about, the barber imagines himself killing the baker right then and there—something he's been tempted to do since he came back to Fleet Street (if only there was another baker willing to bake his victims into pies he would've killed her already!).

SWEENEY TODD: *thinking while MRS. LOVETT is blabbering away* I wonder if Mrs. Mooney's willing to make cannibal pies? I mean, she does use cats for her pies. It's not like humans are any different. Meat is still meat...

Suddenly, a carriage stops beside them and two men walk out of it. They drag the barber and the baker into the carriage, sending the baker into hysteria.

MRS. LOVETT: Hey, what are you doing? Where are you taking us? NOOOO! STOP IT! I DON'T WANNA GO WITH YOU!

Though the barber is puzzled and suspicious of the two men carting them away, he remains silent. The baker, on the other hand, continues to panic.

MRS. LOVETT: YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIIIIIVEEEE! NEEEEVVERRRR!

Frustrated with the woman's behavior, one of the men takes out a syringe and approaches the baker.

MRS. LOVETT: WHAT'S THAT? That's not drugs, is it? 'Cause if it is I should totally report you to the police 'cause that's really dangerous and it can really—

MAN #1: For the love of God, woman! SHUT THE FUCK UP! *injects sedative into her arm*

SWEENEY TODD: *to himself* At least someone here knows exactly what to do with this woman.

MRS. LOVETT: NOOO! I DON'T WANNA—wanna...Ooh, preeetttyyy raaainbow... *falls asleep*

SWEENEY TODD: Thank heavens!

MAN #1: Don't mention it, man. That bitch was getting on our nerves.

SWEENEY TODD: Where are you taking us anyway?

MAN #2: Oh, we're not allowed to tell. We'll get there though. Eventually...*flicks his tongue and winks at SWEENEY TODD*

SWEENEY TODD: WTF?