One Shot. Set after 'Padre' Please note: I'm not sure if the shirt Brandon wore when he went to visit Callie at the group home in 1x12 is the same as the one he was wearing in 1x15 (it's hard to tell with the lighting), but for the sake of the story, it is
I do not own any of the Fosters characters, dialogue, etc. The song of which the lyrics can be found in the title and at the end of the story are from 'Arms' by Christina Perri.
It didn't take long to sort out the new living arrangements. Callie was back living with the Fosters in a week and Brandon had moved in with his dad. Deep down she knew she had made the right choice; as much as she thought she could do it all on her own, she needed people. She needed a family. She needed this family. That didn't stop her from smiling sadly whenever she walked past Brandon's now empty room. She knew he understood, which kind of made her love him even more. But she couldn't think like that anymore; she would be a Foster in a month's time. His sister. As much as she wanted to be adopted, that thought still made her sick to her stomach. She and Brandon had been separated by the Mom's for the obvious reasons, but the arrangement worked in their favour too. They both just sort of knew that they needed to be as apart as possible for a while. To try and move on.
But while Callie tried to block it out, her conversation with Brandon on the day of his grandfather's funeral played over and over again in her mind. She told him he was her hero, and he was, in every sense of the word. He had brought her back to life, opened her up to love and most heroically of all, let her go when she needed him too. As they both held each other and Callie could feel Brandon holding back tears, she didn't know if she could be as brave; if she would be able to let go. Their embrace was closer, longer and more desperate than normal, knowing it would be the last time they would be in each other's arms this way. But as Brandon's grandmother stepped outside, and the two quickly separated, they both knew, as much as they loved each other, this was the end. Callie had always liked Sharon Elkin with her spunky, fun, but loving nature. Brandon and Callie sat still just inches apart as his grandmother told them about her ex-husband's coat. Callie couldn't help but feel a similar kind of finality between her and Brandon now. Sure they would still love each other, but it wouldn't be the same kind of love anymore. Then, as Brandon got up to leave, he turned to look back at Callie. The sight of his face only broke her heart more, so as soon as his back was turned once again and he made his was back inside the house, she let tears finally roll down her face.
Her first night back in the house, Callie returned to her old bedroom after brushing her teeth, and slid in between the warm covers, snuggling into them. It was almost like they were welcoming her back; welcoming her home.
"I'm really glad you're back," said Mariana earnestly as she placed the book she was reading on her bedside table.
"Thanks," replied Callie honestly. "It's good to be home."
At that Mariana smiled, turned off her bedside lamp, and rolled over to sleep. Just as Callie was about to do the same, she felt something under her pillow. It wasn't hard or solid, but some item had definitely been stuffed under it. She reached under the pillow and felt that whatever it was, was definitely some piece of clothing. She assumed Mariana must have been throwing her clothes around the room in an attempt to figure out what to wear one of the many mornings while Callie was away, and left something behind. However as she pulled the item out, she discovered it was not one of the million pieces of clothing Mariana owned that Callie would never remember. Callie knew this shirt. She had felt this shirt in her arms, and knew the strong arms that fit into it. She knew that colour; a kind of red-ish maroon, that weirdly comforted her, probably because it reminded her of him. She knew the material, strong and firm, yet soft and warm. She knew its smell, with traces of fabric softener, cologne and him. She knew this shirt, for it was there when she ran out of the group home and into it's loving embrace as well as it's owner. For a moment she didn't understand. Why was this shirt here? Was he trying to hurt her in some way? To remind her of a significant moment in there relationship as if to say, "this is what you've lost"? But then she remembers. She remembered the warmth of the shirt from a more recent moment, as she and Brandon truly held each other for the last time. She remembered watching the maroon shirt walk away and close the door on what had been the first love apart from that of family, that she had ever known. And she remembered Sharon, wrapped up in Frank's oversized coat.
"He was wearing this the last time he told me he loved me."
Callie knew now that this shirt was hers. She wouldn't be able to wear it in front of everyone, but it was still hers and she would keep it. It was a reminder to her of the last time Brandon told Callie he loved her. Of what she and Brandon had. A reminder of her first real love. What it was and what it couldn't be anymore. She sat up in her bed with tears in her eyes and quietly reached for her bag. She didn't have a box or really anything to keep it in, so until she did, Callie decided to stuff the shirt to the bottom of her bag where it would be safe and no one would find it. As she laid her head down on her no-longer lumpy pillow and closed her eyes to stop her tears, despite what she told herself, in her heart knew the real reason why she would always keep that shirt. Because it knew that in spite of everything, that shirt was home to her too.
I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart
But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start
You put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
You put your arms around me and I'm home
How many times will you let me change my mind and turn around?
I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown
I hope that you see right through my walls
I hope that you catch me 'cause I'm already falling
I'll never let a love get so close
You put your arms around me and I'm home
…
I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth
And I've never opened up
I've never truly loved 'til you put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
…
You put your arms around me and I'm home