Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers. This takes place after Age of Ultron but before Civil War. Warning mentions of attempted rape.
Love is for Children
Natasha shuffled down the dark hallway of the Avenger's Facility. She had just gotten back from a solo mission and it was pretty late or early, however you wanted to look at it. The mission was a success and she couldn't wait to crawl into her bed. She could feel the drugs the doctors had given her kicking in. She had been too tired to argue and her sore body was grateful for it anyway.
"Natalia," her head snapped up while she owlishly blinked at the man coming towards her.
"Barnes?"
Before her foggy brain could fully process what was going on he was upon her, grabbing her arms and crushing his lips on hers.
Acting on instinct she bit down hard on his lip and shoved him away.
The Winter Soldier laughed as he wiped the blood from his lip, " I forgot you like it rough, my fiery spider."
She frowned as the Russian rolled off his tongue and was too slow to dodge as he smacked her hard across the face with his metal hand. She stumbled from the force of the blow and her sprained ankle gave out on her as she crashed to the cold floor.
He smiled as she attempted to crawl away, but he grabbed her ankle and she couldn't hold back the gasp as he squeezed and she could feel the bones grinding together. As he yanked her back to him, she swung out with her other foot and it connected hard with his face. But he swiftly recovered and shoved her hard against the unforgiving tile. The ceiling swam above her as she could feel his lips along her neck and his hands gliding up her sides under her shirt, bruised ribs screaming in protest at the contact.
Then, suddenly the crushing weight disappeared as a red light illuminated the hallway.
"Bucky!" That was Steve's voice from the other end of the hallway. "Are you okay?" Was he ok, he was the one attacking her! Choking back the bile that rose up the back of her throat she struggled to push herself up off the floor to take in the new comers and re-assess the situation.
Feeling someone coming towards her, she quickly brought up the knife she had pulled out seconds ago, "Don't," Wanda held up her hands and took several steps away from the red head, whose hair and clothes were in disarray but the hand holding the knife was steady. She had been roused from her slumber by the feelings of terror radiating in the facility.
"Did she stab you?" Natasha frowned and looked back over to Steve who was checking over Bucky who was recovering from his impact with the wall and shaking his head in a daze.
As Bucky looked down at himself, trying to remember what just happened, Natasha let loose a litany of what were presumably Russian swear words and staggered her way passed the group and to her room. She did not want to deal with this right now.
She used the wall for support as her vision was starting to go black and she hoped she made it to her room before that happened.
"Steve..." Wanda tilted her head at the streak of red on the wall left behind in Natasha's wake.
"Nat," Steve lightly grabbed her shoulder and she whirled on him, the knife still clutched tightly in her grasp aimed at his abdomen. They both looked down, expecting to see the steel of the knife with blood oozing around it but instead saw the red glow fade and noticed that the blade of the knife had been unnaturally bent sideways so as to avoid slicing into the Captain.
Natasha dropped the knife and stumbled away from Steve, shocked at what she had almost done, "Bozhe moi". Tears welled up in her eyes as she shook her head back and forth, trying to erase the image from her mind.
"Hey, it's ok. I'm fine. I shouldn't have snuck up on you like that," though usually no one could sneak up on the spy. He tried to pull her into his embrace, but she kept backing away from him.
"I could have killed you!"
When he finally thought she had given in to his comfort, he suddenly realized that she was leaning on him a lot. Upon looking down at her, he noticed that her eyes were closed and there was a blossoming red spot on her shirt from stitches that had popped open.
He scooped her up into his arms and rushed to the infirmary, his best friend forgotten.
Rubbing a hand down his face he came back out to find everyone's expectant faces. "She's fine, just passed out from the blood loss and the pain meds. They're going to keep her for observation." He put his hands on his hips, "Now what happened?" Wanda had telepathically woken them up with a distress signal but Steve had only came up on the aftermath.
"I-I was having a flashback," Bucky wouldn't look at anyone, just staring intently at his feet in shame.
"You were trying to rape her," Rhodey spat in disgust and next to him Wanda flinched, she had never felt such feelings coming from the Black Widow nor seen her so rattled.
"I'm sorry," Bucky didn't even try to deny it or defend himself, and Steve's face fell.
"Buck, you should get checked out too. You hit your head pretty hard," Steve nodded to the other exam room as Bucky just nodded compliantly and made his way there.
"That's it! Shouldn't he be locked up or something!" Rhodey stood up in outrage.
"I'll handle it." Steve stood firm.
"Are we even safe here? He shouldn't be here!" Rhodey spluttered.
"I said I'll handle it," Steve calmly reiterated, but they could all see he was close to losing it. Rhodey stalked off and Vision, Sam, and Wanda quietly followed him.
Wanda pulled out her phone and began dialing. Sam looked over at her in puzzlement, "Who are you callin?"
"Clint," he didn't know if she was calling him to come comfort Natasha or herself. Clint and her had grown close after her brother had died saving the archer's life.
Sam walked back to the infirmary with coffee for him and Steve, knowing that Steve probably should't be left alone right now. He sat down next to Steve and handed him the mug and looked over to see the screen of his laptop which was playing the security footage from earlier that night, "Man, why are you watching this?"
He looked away as Bucky all but pounced on the petite spy, that he had come to call friend in the recent years ever since she showed up on his doorstep claiming that everyone she knew was trying to kill her.
Steve accepted the coffee gratefully and shut the laptop, knowing that the image of his best friend attacking and trying to rape the person he had probably grown closest to in this century, who had already suffered more than enough, would be burned forever in his mind.
"Thanks," Steve hung his head, not knowing what else to say. He wanted the video to show him something different, he thought Bucky was getting better, that they were helping him.
xxx
Natalia watched the man with sharp, green eyes. The other girls were afraid of him, but not her. She liked a challenge, that metal arm was something unique. They told them to call him the Winter Soldier. He was also referred to as Solder, the Asset, and other rude names that do not bear repeating.
She ducked the punch aimed at her face as she saw the flash of silver out of the corner of her eye.
"What's your name?"
"What?" in his puzzlement, she was able to take him down and pin him to the mat. Curtained by her red hair she leaned close to his ear, "Everyone has a name. What's yours?"
He frowned, "I don't know. I don't have a name."
"Everyone has a name," she stated again with confidence as she sat back on his lap.
"Winter Soldier," he answered with a little more confidence.
"That's not a name, silly," she giggled and in annoyance he bucked her off sending her flying through the air.
xxx
He leaned over and adjusted her grip on the rifle, "Like this Natalia." And he knew that she did this on purpose. She was one of the best students the Red Room had and had flourished under his training. He guided her hands and brought the rifle up, looking down the scope at the target down range. He could smell her flowery shampoo. She took the opportunity to lean back into him. Shaking his head he walked away and could see her smirking as she hit the bullseye each and every time.
xxx
He brought her down hard on the mat and she wiggled under him, trying to find away out of his grasp. "James," she stilled and looked into his ice blue eyes. "My name is James." And that earned him a dazzling smile from the girl beneath him.
xxx
"James," she cried out and he quickly kissed her to quiet her lest they alert the handlers to their nighttime activites.
xxx
"Natalia, I missed you," he tucked a strand red hair behind her ear as he held her tight.
"Then you shouldn't go on such long missions, James." She kissed his bare chest. Then they jumped as the door slammed open and James was yanked from the bed.
He began to fight back as they grabbed Natalia, "Stand down, Soldier." And he immediately stopped even though his mind was screaming at him, how dare they put their hands on his Natalia!
He was led into the bowels of the facility and strapped into the chair as Natalia was dragged kicking and screaming behind him.
The apparatus was lowered onto his head as she was thrown uncermoniously at his feet.
"Watch and know that this is because of you dear." The man had grabbed Natalia's face and forced her to watch as James cried out in pain as his memories were erased, knowing that this was all her fault. She shouldn't have fallen in love with the Winter Soldier.
She shook the man off as they put James in the cryo tube. "No, James!" She reached out to where she could slightly see his face through the frosted over viewing window.
"Say goodbye to your lover." She was then dragged away and strapped down to a metal table and forced to forget all about James. Black Widows weren't supposed to have feelings, love is for children.
xxx
"James," she mumbled and as she came to she could feel a presence beside her and she quickly jerked away.
"Hey, hey, Tasha. It's just me, Clint." She relaxed into his touch and suddenly the tears came and he pulled her into his arms as she sobbed.
"How could they!" Clint had no idea what she was talking about but he just soothingly rubbed her back.
After a while she pulled back and wiped her face, "I need to see him."
He tried to stop her from getting out of the bed, but she just batted his hands away, "Whoa, who?"
"James," at his frown she clarified, "Barnes."
"What?! Why! He did this to you," she just glared at him.
Clint sighed, "He's in the sub levels. They are putting him back in cryo."
She dropped the shoe she was trying to slip on, "What?!" And then ignoring her injuries she ran from the room.
"Natasha wait! It was for his own good. It was his choice." But she didn't stop, not until she saw his face behind the frosted viewing window just like all those years ago.
She reached out again as if to touch him but dropped her hand just before she could. "I loved him and they took him from me." And this time she did lean into him for comfort as both her and Steve lost James "Bucky" Buchanan Barnes again.