AN: Yeah, I know I haven't updated in about two years. But I'm doing this story anyway, so HA!

So, things to know for this story: well, it's AU. Everyone is human (for now), and they've lived human lives (for the most part.)

Alec and Isabelle were adopted at a young age by Stephen and Celine Herondale. They've never even met their real parents, though they know what their last name would have been. Jace is, of course, a part of the family. Don't ask about Max, I'll get to that later. So, Alec, Isabelle and the Herondales live in some town in Arizona. I think that's all you need to know for now.

So without further ado, I give you…

Smiley Face

A Mortal Instruments Fanfic

Disclaimer: I don't own Mortal Instruments. Any familiar names, places, etc. are property of Cassandra Clare.

Prologue

The room was completely silent. A harsh light shined over the face of Alec Lightwood as he stared intently at the pure horror written on the page in front of him…

a) Evaluate the sum

∑ ⁿi=1 (1+i/ n)(2/n)

b) Based on part a), evaluate ∫²0 (1+x) dx. Justify your answer

.

Alec's mind went blank. He took a deep breath and glanced back at the notes. Shit… those would not be helpful at all; at the moment, they didn't exist. Turning back to the problem at hand, Alec struggled to remember the steps involved.

"ALEC!" a voice yelled from down the hallway. Alec looked up, glad to have the distraction. It was his sister, Isabelle, looking quite energetic. "Did you have any plans for tonight?"

"Yes. They start with 'm" and end with 'ath'." As soon as he said it, she frowned.

"Honestly, Alec, you have to get a life."

"I have a life." Isabelle snorted.

"Yes, it starts with 'm' and ends with 'ath'," she teased. Alec huffed and returned to his work. "Come on, you are always studying."

"That's because Celine and Stephen are always talking about how successful I'm going to be at law school. Or med school. Or in astronaut training." He bit his lip.

"That would be cool," Izzy admitted. "I've never heard of a doctor/laywer/astronaut. Oh! I know! You could heal aliens that had been mugged, and then defend them in court!"

Alec stared at his sister as though she were crazy. "That makes no sense."

"Neither does the whole working thing," she said firmly.

"Okay then, I'll show you how it works." Izzy raised her eyebrows, but sat down as he continued. "See, the first thing is to put the talking on hold." Izzy nodded. Alec turned back to his homework, only to get smacked on the back of the head by Isabelle.

"This isn't even funny, Alec, it's just sad." She shook her head, feigning shame.

"It's not sad that I'm trying to secure my future."

Isabelle blinked. "Who said that phrase before, Celine or Stephen? Or the guidance counselor?"

"Stephen, although the Mrs. Haggerty has said it more than enough."

"Really?" a voice said from the doorway. "I come down here to find you guys talking about Mrs. Haggerty? That woman gives me the creeps."

"She's not that bad," said Isabelle. "She helped that girl Melissa through… some eating disorder."

"Women are not supposed to have beards," Jace said firmly.

"Although it's okay for them to be beards, right, Jace? Isn't that why you dated Melissa in the first place?"

"Hey! She was not a beard. She just never brought up the eating disorder."

"If you two don't mind," interrupted Alec. "I have to get back to work. Can you please leave?"

"NO!" Isabelle shouted at him. "Alec, I refuse to let you rot away doing homework your entire life! You are coming to this party whether you like it or not!"

"Whoa, what's this about a party?" Jace asked.

"Izzy-" Alec began, but Isabelle interrupted him.

"I'm just meeting a couple people at a club up in Phoenix, and Alec is coming with me."

Jace laughed, undoubtedly at the thought of Alec going to a club. Alec frowned.

"Izzy, I just can't-"

"Alec, please! Just do this one thing for me," and she gave Alec that look that reminded him that this was his little sister…

"Fine! But I'm not dancing." As soon as he said it, Jace burst out laughing. Alec gave him a glare but he kept laughing. He caught his breath and eventually stopped. The room was suddenly quiet and awkward.

"I've gotta go get ready," Jace said, and he was gone instantly. Alec leaned back and sighed.

"Is he always going to be like this?" he asked Isabelle. She shrugged, trying to look sympathetic.

"Honestly Alec, you can't expect him to be totally cool with it. I know he's practically your brother – don't give me that look, it's true – but how else was he supposed to take it? After seventeen years of thinking of you as a brother, what is he supposed to think when he finds out you like him?" She gave him a look, then said, "You weren't thinking…" and she nodded in the direction of the bed.

"NO!" Alec shouted at her, turning red.

"Then what-"

"Can you please go, Izzy?" he asked, turning back to his math.

"Fine," she said after a moment. "But don't go back to math, you have to get ready for the club."

Alec nodded and stood. He looked at her again, and she walked out. He wished more than ever that he hadn't told Jace how he felt, and that he'd kept his big mouth shut. He missed the old days… but it was too late to take anything back.

Alec looked towards his closet then, wondering what kind of clothes would be appropriate for a club.

~*~*~*~*~*~*Let's do the time warp again!*~*~*~*~*~*~

Alec opened his eyes, only to shield them again from the bright sunlight filtering through the window. Holy shit… his head felt like it had been split open in two, and then stepped on by a bunch of soccer players, stitched back together, and torn apart with a chain saw. He moaned in pain and tried to pull the itchy blankets up over his head. Wait a minute… his sheets weren't that uncomfortable…

He opened his eyes, and, shielding them from the light, looked around.

He was lying in an unfamiliar bed in what he assumed was a cheap hotel room. It was a small room, with dark walls that were chipped in several places, two small windows that were tinted with grime, and a brown carpet that was… well, it might not have been brown before, but it was now. His mind went blank. How the hell…

How did he get here? He tried to think back to the night before, but it was a complete blank. He couldn't remember how he'd gotten here. Was he still in Phoenix? He… yeah, they'd gone to a club in Phoenix. As their family lived in some small town in Arizona, if they ever wanted to do something cool, they had to take the two hour drive out to Phoenix. But where was Alec?

He stood up to look out the window, but he suddenly felt an uncomfortable breeze. He looked down… oh my… he was naked! Alec hastened around the room, ignoring the headache pounding in his skull while trying to find his clothes. He slowly became more and more panicked, as he couldn't find them. All he found was a pair of leather pants and a mesh T-shirt. There was no way in hell those were his.

Oh no… his phone was in his jeans pocket! So now he was stuck with no clothes, no phone, and… shit! Where the hell was Izzy? When he found her, he was going to get so mad. He'd hug her to death.

So where was he? Oh right… NO PHONE, NO CLOTHES, NO FAMILY! Where was he anyways?

Taking a very bold move, he stepped towards the window and pulled the curtain open, being careful to keep his lower half covered. But all thoughts vanished when he looked out the window.

It was sort of like being in a forest of concrete. There was nothing but buildings outside. If he looked far enough, he could see the glint of water to the right. It slowly dawned on him that it was the Atlantic Ocean. Because, turning to the right, Alec saw the familiar and iconic Empire State Building. There wasn't even any joking about it. One large point surrounded by an infinite forest of buildings. There was no mistaking it… but it had to be a mistake.

He couldn't be… but he was…

He was in New York City. With no pants.

AN: Let the games begin!