Oneshot. Hawke tells Sebastian the real reason she is letting Anders live. And then Amell shows up and give Anders a piece of her mind.
"I will hunt you and your precious Anders down."
"WAIT" Hawke exclaimed, Sebastian turned around and saw her throwing her dagger at him. But it fell at his feet, and if Sebastian knew anything about Hawke it was the fact that she could aim, even if the knife didn't exactly work as their bows and arrows. But he knew that she wasn't aiming at him she was simply throwing him the knife.
"Why would I fight you, I said "I" won't kill him, I am not responsible for his life or his actions."
Sebastian took up the knife and walked towards Anders to finish what Hawke was too cowardly to do herself.
"But! First think" Sebastian turned towards her with a glare that said 'now, you're just stalling. There's nothing to think about'. Hawke returned the glare with a smirk "Yeah, I know such a tough concept "thinking"". Isabela chuckled, Varric laughed, Fenris smirked, Aveline coughed and Merrill wondered out loud what was tough about thinking. Hawke seemed to swallow a retort, and continued speaking to Sebastian "There is 'Something' inside Anders and if you kill him you'll let it loose. And as much as I sympathized with the mages, so many of them proved why the circle was necessary. But now that you're planning to let 'Justice', or 'vengeance' or whatever that twisted being inside him is, loose. You are giving it a chance to cause another massacre for a much clearer cause, if it possesses, hmm I don't know, an elven slave maybe it'll decide to kill all humans. Here the damage is done, I would have killed him in a heartbeat if it meant stopping the war, but I won't give him the satisfaction of thinking that he died a martyr". She was shouting by the end of her speech, her face flushed and fire was almost blazing out of her eyes.
A loud slow clap resounded "Couldn't have said it better myself, cousin".
The sound came from a woman leaning against the gates to the courtyard, on seeing her Anders' eyes that seemed closer to those of a dead man by the end of Hawke's speech seemed to regain some light in them. Hawke could see the warden whom they met during the qunari invasion three years ago, Alistair, his name was, he was standing protectively close to her. Barely, half a step behind them was the flirty assassin they met in the caves in Sundermount, he had a rather sad smile on his face as he looked at the warden and the woman. Lagging behind them and looking at the trio with reverence in his eyes was the warden they saved from the deep roads, Nathaniel. "Warden, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" came Isabela's voice.
"No more than you, Isabela."
"I thought you didn't swing that way."
"I don't, but it doesn't mean I can't appreciate beauty when I see it, never thought it was possible but I miss being called the warden."
Hawke understood who she was, but she was supposed to be a mage, why is she carrying a sword and wearing leather armor not robes.
"Cousin! you're staring at my sword." After a minute's pause, the hero of fereldan exploded into laughter, accompanied by the assassin and Isabela while Alistair's face became magically red, Nathaniel looked at her like she was possessed
"That would've been so much funnier if I were a guy."
"Something is deeply wrong with your family." was all Fenris said as he mirrored Hawke's smile.
The hero seemed to sober up as her eyes fell on Anders.
"It's a skill I learned while dealing with a man who took his revenge too far."
Her demeanor suddenly changed, as did her posture she straightened her back and gave an aura of command that would probably make Meredith tremble.
"I am Shahr Amell, most people know me as the hero of Fereldan after the blight I was given the rank of Warden Commander of Fereldan, after some events I relinquished the title. However, due to my achievements I have been given the authority to use that title if, and whenever I see fit. And since the perpetrator of this massacre is a grey warden whom I had recruited personally, I have judged that my interference is needed."
Alistair knew that the full blown speech was her way of calming down, stating the facts so that she could get her emotions out of the way, he stepped back and saw Zevran doing the same. They gestured to Nathaniel to come forth, they knew her best but they never knew Anders, Nathaniel was whom she needed in that moment, they both grudgingly admitted that in the way they looked at him.
"Champion, I am about to put a warden on trial. Strictly speaking none of you should be allowed to attend but since you saved Nathaniel's life and have known Anders for the last seven years, you are allowed to attend the trial and you can choose whomever you trust to stay, as well."
"I shall take my leave." Sebastian said and Marian let out a sigh of relief.
"That will be all, Commander." Hawke told her cousin with a slight bow of her head. She had never met the hero of Fereldan before but she knew they were cousins, and the familiarity she greeted her with gave her the impression that they could get along well but the moment she switched her speech from 'cousin' to 'champion' she turned into someone else, somewhere between Aveline and the Arishok, Hawke wasn't even sure which side was worst, and Hawke knew this was not the time for any sarcastic remarks, not that she had any to begin with.
"Warden Anders, rise."
"Commander, I..".She silenced him with a raise of her hand.
"Bring out the other one, first."
"Commander, please I thought you of all people would understand."
"The other one, now. Anders, bring out the demon inside you" The commander's voice was rising and her eyes burned with fury while Anders' eyes started burning blue.
"A demon is someone who lets darkspawn roam however they wish." Came the spirit's voice.
"This isn't about my crimes. It's about yours"
"So you admit it was a crime."
"Yes, but at least my crime was sparing the guilty. Not killing dozens of innocent."
"You did more than that. You let a talking darkspawn experiment on grey wardens as he pleased, with your blessing!"
"You weren't there." Nathaniel intervened "he offered a way out, a way other than having to kill each other all the time, I believed the commander made the right choice at that time."
"Nathaniel, that's enough. Spirit, I am in no way obliged to explain my actions to you, but I will, because I can't help but feel that not explaining them all those years ago helped cause this."
The warden-commander suddenly looked older and weary, she looked exhausted and disheartened, like she had been fighting a long battle with no end in sight.
"During the attack on Amaranthine, a darkspawn following the architect came to warn me about the attack on Vigil's keep. I saw a way out and I took it, the architect was offering a chance to undo the taint, end the blights for good, but then I knew that he caused the fifth blight in the first place and I knew it was a mistake, I can't undo it and I'm not arrogant enough to think that I can take him down while he's prepared so for now we have a strained truce." She took a long breath contemplating whether she should speak the next words.
"I saw you in him, a foreigner to this world, so curious as to how it works, what people feel and I figured it might work for the second time. You just assured me how wrong I was. Give Anders control again, I'll sentence you when I'm done."
"I truly did respect you commander."
"So did I Kristoff, so did I." whether she lost her respect to 'Justice' or herself was unclear by the look in her eyes.
Nathaniel looked at Alistair for a brief moment, and Alistair gave him an imperceptible nod. Nathaniel moved forward and placed his hand on the hero's shoulder and gave her a reassuring squeeze. She looked back at him with a hint of tears in her eyes and he squeezed again. "Commander, I.."
"Commander, I thought you of all people would understand." Anders interrupted him, the commander looked at him with the faintest 'thank you' smile on her lips, he'd learned to tell her smiles apart over the years, and an imperceptible nod that reminded him that couples do tend to behave alike when they've been together for so long. He pulled his hand away and stepped back.
"What the hell would I understand, Anders? Your desperate need to prove to the world that mages are indeed dangerous beasts that deserve to be locked up, give a mage a chance to live freely, to do a decent job protecting people and he'll throw it right at your face, Rylock was right about you."
"You didn't see the circle here, at least the circle in Fereldan could claim that it was gilded. This circle is nothing like that."
"So destroy the circle! Kill the 'evil' templars, and the 'weak willed' mages who let themselves be controlled"
"Even the shit I just said would've made more sense than the shit you pulled. There were innocent people in there, people who had nothing to do with mages or templars, a woman praying for her sick child, orphans who lived in there because they have nowhere else to go, a Fereldan beggar asking for food because I couldn't save them, those were the people you killed and every other mage who will be killed out of fear of turning into you, or out of vengeance because a loved one, a relative was in the chantry today."
"If, if I had destroyed the circle would you have forgiven me?"
The commander smiled in a most sinister way, it sent a chill through Hawke's spine.
"I would have killed you then."
"Warden Anders, you are to be sentenced to live under vigil's keep, as you well know the tunnels under it are vast. You are to be sent to your calling early, food will be placed at the gate every couple of days and bear in mind that if you die the spirit within you will only have darkspawn to possess."
"It would've been kinder to kill me."
"I have no doubt."