The Weariest of Bones
Introduction
She felt like everything in her had stopped, as if she were a huge clock that had ground to a halt, it's no longer useful hands frozen against it's face stuck and unable to move, it's cogs stopping of their own accord and too an outsider looking in, it would have seemed like there was no reason for it at all.
"Elizabeth?" She blinked, snapping back to reality as the world suddenly sped back into real time and she nodded rapidly to try and cover up that she hadn't been listening. "No surprise I'm back obviously,"
"Of course," she said with a forced smile but feeling her hands beginning to shake, her knuckles tightening around the books she held to her chest.
"I mean there wasn't really any big surprises this year transfer wise. Pretty much everyone knew about Eric right?"
"Of course!" she exclaimed with a breathy laugh.
"I mean he was always a bit on the wild side wasn't he?" Gregory said with a light-hearted laugh, smiling warmly down at her.
"I'm sure he'll be extremely happy in dauntless," she said with a smile, he returned this.
"God knows I will be, can't come after you anymore," He said with a wink, she smiled, letting out a small laugh. "Anyway, I've got a class to attend so I'll see you soon?"
"Of course, you know I'm always around." He gave her a wink, his hand brushing down her shoulder before he moved off.
She felt her breath catch in her throat as he left, and was suddenly extremely aware that she couldn't breathe. She moved, hurrying through the main library and as she exited beginning to run, feeling tears burn in her eyes horribly as she stumbled into one of the reading rooms which she knew would be empty. She dropped her books to the floor with a clatter, turning and throwing her hands against the door and slamming it closed from the world.
She stayed there for a second, her hands pressed against the smooth wood, head down as if she felt nauseous. For a moment it was silent, the only sound being her unlevelled breathing, which slowly began to evolve, rapidly turning into shaking breathy sobs and she turned, pressing her back against the door. She looked out into the dim light at the world outside of the tainted window and it occurred to her for the first time how grey it all looked, how cold everything here was. She gasped for air which she still couldn't catch hold of, as if it had all evaporated, as if the room had been sucked dry of every molecule of life.
She made a sound of confused, desperate frustration and suddenly moved, grabbing the notebook from the floor and ripping it open with such force she almost tore it in half. Her eyes scanned over pages and pages of handwriting, reading them over and over again as if looking for some hidden clue of betrayal, her heart feeling as if it was going to rupture then and there in her chest. It was here! It was all here! The words of someone who loved her written for her by him in his own hand, words and words and words, she hadn't imagined it, the evidence was looking her right in the face and it had been real! So how was this happening?!
"You LAIR!" She cried and she began ripping out the pages and pages of his handwriting, tearing and shredding and ripping it apart.
She stopped, hearing a sound from outside the door and she looked up, a movement that caused a tear to stream down her cheek. She paused, watching the young woman who stood outside through the slice of glass embedded in the wood. Elizabeth stood for what seemed like hours, unable to breath and staring at the girl through the glass. The girl was frowning, her long hair plaited behind her like normal. Normal…how could she be so normal?
The girl pulled a sympathetic face, pressing her hand up against the glass, silently and without words asking if she could come inside. Elizabeth shook her head, her anger suddenly subsiding into grief as she looked at her friend and she began to sob as the notebook slid from her hands back down to the ground like some dead thing. The girl pushed through the door, coming to her rescue and holding onto her as she began to properly cry and they collapsed to the floor together.
"I'm sorry Lizzie, I'm so sorry…" but Elizabeth only continued to cry, unable to form any thoughts or words.
Martha felt her friend's pain and as she held her friend, she glanced over at the torn paper upon the floor and all she could do was curse him for being such a coward. Dauntless, faction of the fearless and the brave…yeah right. She swallowed, her eyes lacing over the samples of Eric's neat handwriting and finding her eyes fixing upon a quote he had written down many months ago in a class to apparently remember 'Indeed — why should I not admit it? — In that moment, my heart was breaking.'