Eight weeks. Had it really been eight weeks since the miserable child was born? Princess Emma asked to herself as she attempted (and failing epically) to soothe her crying baby; it seemed the more she tried to soothe him, the angrier he became. Emma didn't know how much more of this she could take. She was exhausted and becoming frustrated and discouraged with each cry her baby continued to utter. She badly wanted to run to her own mother for help but that was out of the question being that Snow, fearing that her daughter was relying a little too much on her, decided to step back a little bit as a way to hopefully get her daughter to take the time to finally bond with her baby. Emma argued that it was just a more 'honorable' form of neglect. (It wasn't - at all - but Emma was in a poor and fragile state of mind at this particular stage of her life, so she tended to be a little more dramatic than usual.)
"Henry…" desperation flooded Emma's voice as she switched her fussing baby to her other shoulder. "I fed you, I burped you, and I changed you! What is wrong?" She was about ready to cry. "This is probably God punishing me for conceiving you the way I did…" she uttered a miserable and pathetic moan. Nothing she did was working; she tried holding him close, she tried gently rocking him, she paced with him around her room, she even tried holding him in that special arm-hold that her father had taught her (which didn't seem all that effective in feminine arms by the way). Whatever trick and tactic she tried, he just kept on crying. Nothing was working and at this point she just wanted to scream; she was really starting to rethink this whole motherhood thing.
She carried him over to her bed and gently laid him down to change his diaper. She was undoing his clothes and for a brief moment, he was quiet; but before Emma could breathe a sigh of relief he started to cry again- actually, this was more like a scream. Why did he never settle for her? He settled for Baelfire, he settled for Snow, he settled for Charming, heck, he even settled for her lady-in-waiting! But Emma was his mother, the woman who carried him for nine months and gave birth to him, yet no matter what she did she could not soothe him. "Henry! Please stop crying!" She groaned as she changed him. "Ughh…you know I wish I could just send you back to where you came from!" After the words left her mouth Henry was silent for a moment before his face began to crinkle as he got ready to cry again. This cry was different from his previous one and even though it was a complete coincidence, Emma was sure that her baby had completely understood her and she immediately regretted her words. She finished doing up his clothes and gently lifted him back up. "Oh, no Henry I'm so sorry!" she apologized as she held his head close to her neck. "Mama didn't mean that! Please forgive me…" she kissed his soft little temples. "It's just that I'm so tired and you're crying so much and I don't know what to do…" she held him more securely as she scooched off her bed to make her way over to her rocking chair; she sat down slowly and gently rocked her chair. She suddenly noticed that Henry had calmed slightly. She sighed and tipped her head back in relief then looked back down at her baby's head; he had his father's dark hair… and that made her smile slightly. While she had been pregnant with him she had hoped their child would look most like Baelfire, and to her excitement (and to Baelfire's dismay) he did. She held Henry against her chest and gingerly kissed his head as he fussed. She wondered if she should start singing to him, but the thought of doing that slightly embarrassed her. Why was she embarrassed to sing to her own child? Babies didn't care what a person's voice sounded like so what did it matter? Just then Henry began to fuss again and Emma made a shushing sound and held him a little bit closer to her chest. She sighed; she was just going to do it. She tried to think of a song she knew, one that maybe she was sung to as a baby. Why was she making this into such a chore? It was just her baby! But she really was genuinely having a difficult time thinking of a song; no surprise at all, given the small amount of sleep she had been getting these recent weeks. She inhaled deeply and decided to just go with the one song that kept coming to her mind, 'Lavender's Blue' - and started softly humming the tune. At the sound of her voice Henry calmed some, uttering a little baby squeak; pausing from her humming, Emma kissed his soft little head again. She really did love her baby… she was just exhausted and overwhelmed; and this was her first child! Motherhood is hard! Then you add the consequences of conceiving the baby out of wedlock on top of everything. Sure, her parents had helped her and Bae right their wrong the best they could but there were still consequences. Right now she wondered if Henry's fussiness and colicky stomach were some of some of those consequences…
She looked down at her baby again and resumed her humming; he stirred a bit in her arms and suddenly, before she knew what she was doing, her hums started to turn into words…
"Call up your men, dilly dilly'
Set them to work
Some to the plow, dilly dilly
Some to the cart
Some to make hay, dilly dilly
Some to cut corn
While you and I, dilly dilly
Keep ourselves warm…"
Her voice was soft and calm as she sang to her baby son and as the lyrics rolled off her tongue, Henry started to doze off. In her arms! He never fell asleep in her arms, unless she was feeding him! Not once since he was born. Usually he only did that in Baelfire's arms, and her mother's; but NEVER hers and it always had left her feeling discouraged and frustrated. Perhaps Snow was right… maybe she had been depending on her too much; she needed to take some time to bond with him, and she finally was. She smiled as her little son lay asleep in her arms, happy and content and a feeling of relief and calmness came over her. Maybe this whole motherhood thing isn't so terrible after all," she thought to herself. She continued to gently rock her chair and softly sing to her baby. As she did so the feelings of overwhelmingness and uncertainty left her and she relaxed even more. She was finally beginning to see what a beautiful blessing her baby actually was. Sure, there would be more struggles and trials ahead but right now, she was just going to enjoy this peaceful, quiet, and beautiful moment.