It's Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Redwall Style! So, therefore, it's
Matthias, a Python, and the Holy Tapestry. Nice, eh? Note: I don't own
Redwall, or anything that the Monty Python peoples have made. Also, I'm
basing this off 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail (book),' so if things are
wrong, well, that's how it is in the book!
First: The Characters! (Of this scene/chapter)
Writer: Writer
King Arthur: Matthias
Patsy: Random Guosim Shrew
Soldiers 1 and 2: Random Woodland Citters
Hoof beats sound in the distance, and out of the mist comes Matthias and Patsy. Patsy is banging two coconut halves together.
Matthias: Wait, there are no horses in Redwall!
Writer: There are now! Shut up! You don't speak yet!
Matthias: But their not typical forms of transportation!
Writer: I don't care! Your not supposed to argue sensibly!
Matthias: But. . .But. . .
Writer: No buts!
Matthias: Fine. Whoa there!
Patsy makes noises of a hose halting, with a flourish. Matthias peers through the mist at a castle. On the catle battlements a soldier is seen.
Soldier 1: Halt! Who goes there?
Matthias: It is I, Matthias, son of, um, I'm a woodland orphan, or was, but. . .anyway, I am from the Abbey of Redwall, Warrior of all Redwallers, defeater of Cluny's horde!
There is a pause.
Soldier 1: Get away!
Matthias: I am. . .And this is my trusty, erm, helper, because servants aren't in Redwall, except for vermin. . . We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of Warriors who will join our Order at Redwall. I must speak with your, um, master-thingy.
Soldier 1: What? Ridden on a horse?
Matthias: Erm, not really. . . well. . . yes.
Soldier 1: Your using coconuts.
Matthias: Yes, I know.
Soldier 1: (is taken aback) that's not your line.
Matthias: I know! Get on with it!
Soldier 1: Um. . .Your using two halves of a coconut and banging them together.
Matthias: (scornfully) So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the Forest of Mossflower. Well, we didn't really, but that's my line.
Soldier 1: Where did you get the coconuts.
Matthias: Through. . .we found them.
Soldier 1: Found them? In Mossflower. The coconut's tropical.
Matthias: What do you mean?
Soldier 1: Well, this is a temperate zone.
Matthias: The swallow may fly south with the sun, or the house martin or the plover seek hot lands in the winter, yet these are not strangers to our land.
Soldier 1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
Matthias: Not at all. They could be carried.
Soldier 1: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?
Matthias: Well, swallows are only as big as mice, and since this shrew, who is very mousish, can carry one, why couldn't a swallow?
Soldier 1: it's not a question of. . .Wait, that makes sense!
Soldier 2: Really?
Soldier 1: What are you doing? Your cue hasn't come yet?
Soldier 2: I was board. Oi, Matthias dude, how do you propose you prove this?
Matthias: I was hoping you'd say that. Oi! Warbeak! Get your feathery butt over here!
Warbeak: Ok. (flies over)
Matthias: Can you carry these coconut halves?
Warbeak: Sure. Warbeak just hafta grip them by da husk!
Matthias: (proudly) See?
Soldiers 1 and 2: Fine. Now go away.
Matthias: (nods to Patsy. They turn and go off into the mist)
Soldier 1: That was interesting
Soldier 2: Yeah.
First: The Characters! (Of this scene/chapter)
Writer: Writer
King Arthur: Matthias
Patsy: Random Guosim Shrew
Soldiers 1 and 2: Random Woodland Citters
Hoof beats sound in the distance, and out of the mist comes Matthias and Patsy. Patsy is banging two coconut halves together.
Matthias: Wait, there are no horses in Redwall!
Writer: There are now! Shut up! You don't speak yet!
Matthias: But their not typical forms of transportation!
Writer: I don't care! Your not supposed to argue sensibly!
Matthias: But. . .But. . .
Writer: No buts!
Matthias: Fine. Whoa there!
Patsy makes noises of a hose halting, with a flourish. Matthias peers through the mist at a castle. On the catle battlements a soldier is seen.
Soldier 1: Halt! Who goes there?
Matthias: It is I, Matthias, son of, um, I'm a woodland orphan, or was, but. . .anyway, I am from the Abbey of Redwall, Warrior of all Redwallers, defeater of Cluny's horde!
There is a pause.
Soldier 1: Get away!
Matthias: I am. . .And this is my trusty, erm, helper, because servants aren't in Redwall, except for vermin. . . We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of Warriors who will join our Order at Redwall. I must speak with your, um, master-thingy.
Soldier 1: What? Ridden on a horse?
Matthias: Erm, not really. . . well. . . yes.
Soldier 1: Your using coconuts.
Matthias: Yes, I know.
Soldier 1: (is taken aback) that's not your line.
Matthias: I know! Get on with it!
Soldier 1: Um. . .Your using two halves of a coconut and banging them together.
Matthias: (scornfully) So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the Forest of Mossflower. Well, we didn't really, but that's my line.
Soldier 1: Where did you get the coconuts.
Matthias: Through. . .we found them.
Soldier 1: Found them? In Mossflower. The coconut's tropical.
Matthias: What do you mean?
Soldier 1: Well, this is a temperate zone.
Matthias: The swallow may fly south with the sun, or the house martin or the plover seek hot lands in the winter, yet these are not strangers to our land.
Soldier 1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
Matthias: Not at all. They could be carried.
Soldier 1: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?
Matthias: Well, swallows are only as big as mice, and since this shrew, who is very mousish, can carry one, why couldn't a swallow?
Soldier 1: it's not a question of. . .Wait, that makes sense!
Soldier 2: Really?
Soldier 1: What are you doing? Your cue hasn't come yet?
Soldier 2: I was board. Oi, Matthias dude, how do you propose you prove this?
Matthias: I was hoping you'd say that. Oi! Warbeak! Get your feathery butt over here!
Warbeak: Ok. (flies over)
Matthias: Can you carry these coconut halves?
Warbeak: Sure. Warbeak just hafta grip them by da husk!
Matthias: (proudly) See?
Soldiers 1 and 2: Fine. Now go away.
Matthias: (nods to Patsy. They turn and go off into the mist)
Soldier 1: That was interesting
Soldier 2: Yeah.