CCS drabbles- funny scenes from stories that I'm too lazy to create but might if you review for them. Each story is numbered- not to mention that some are dirtier than others- so just put the number if you want it turned into an actual story. Enjoy!(Also, some clips have 'Li' but some have 'Syaoran')
1-"So doctor, what's the diagnosis?" Asked Eriol as he and his guardians cautiously stepped into the bedroom of the ailing card mistress, where the plush form of her sun-guardian was fussing over the poor girl. "Can't you tell?" Asked Yue- the 'doctor'.
"Well", Stated Eriol in his famously calm voice, "Probably, but you're the certified healer so I'd like for you to confirm my suspicions." Yue sighed inaudibly before asking, "Suspicions of who? The card mistress with the physical ailment, the guardian beast with the mental ailment or both?" "Both if you please." Eriol answered while smiling as if he were dealing with a long time friend.
"The girl is suffering from a common cold, but that will disappear in a day or two, what with her magical power as high as it is. Now, Cerberus' problem is much more complicated to solve seeing as how it is a long standing case of excessive paranoia." He intoned coldly. "I'm sure you'd know all about that, wouldn't you Yue?" Eriol gave him an infuriating grin. "Unfortunately, having been the sole recipient for Kero's mothering nature most of my life." Yue sighed long-sufferingly as he dredged up memories of five hundred years past, remembering in great detail of how Kero would fuss and complain over the tiniest of scratches. "A good example of this being yesterday." Yue said after he was finished with his short reverie. "What happened yesterday?" Ruby asked from Eriol's side. "The fool's incessant whining was giving me a migraine and- I SWEAR- the SECOND that he got wind of it, I was lying curled under several pounds of blankets with a damp wash rag and thermometer haphazardly shoved down my throat!" Yue's eyes were alight with outrage at the memory and Eriol shifted nervously. "Well then, if that's what Kero did to you over a headache and he nearly choked YOU… what do you think he could unintentionally do to Sakura?" Everyone's face drained of color at that. "We have to get him to change 'patients' then. But…" Yue stared helplessly at Eriol, silently pleading not to make him offer his body to the mercy of his mother- hen of a brother.
"You had a headache yesterday so it wouldn't be too far a shot if you were to pass out to draw his attention." Eriol smiled sympathetically at the quaking moon guardian. "But…" "No buts Yue, she's your mistress and her safety should be your top priority." Yue sighed again- he seemed to be doing that a lot lately. "You'll have to act surprised and not interfere what-so-ever. I've already called Touya through our mental length so he's going to catch me and I- and Cerberus by proxy- will be relocated to Touya's room away from the mistress." Eriol nodded his head as Yue muttered about how embarrassing it was to have to swoon like a faint maiden. Putting his hand to his head, Yue mimicked a swaying motion that slightly caught Cerberus' attention before drawing a quick intake of breath and falling slackly into Touya's outstretched arms before Touya started his part of the act. "Hey Yue! Are you alright?" If nothing else did, this certainly caught Cerberus' attention because he swiftly transformed and changed targets.
Coming over to his unconscious brother, he began nuzzling him to see if he would wake. When he did not, Cerberus began ordering everyone to position before an, inconspicuously, glaring Yue was hauled off to Touya's bed followed by an anxious Kero.
2-"But why would anyone want to take Yue?" Asked Eriol. "Why indeed, allow us to count the ways." Said Kero as he and Li started listing reasons. "Most advanced healer in all the three worlds." He drawled. "Most powerful necromancer in the three worlds." Li chimed in. "Beautiful"; "Powerful"; "Smart"; "Well endowed". Li remarked dreamily as Eriol and Spinnel spit out their tea. Kero then started to add another reason when he comprehended what the boy had said and started to rapidly transform, his eyes bleeding red and hackles rising he yelled out, "And how the HELL would you know something like THAT?"
Cerberus then attempted to charge Li but was held back by Nakuru, Sakura, and Tomoyo as the boy pleaded his case and cried out in embarrassment, "I didn't mean it like that! I meant like, in terms that should he be married, he'd have a large dowry because he's a moon being created into a rich house!" Cerberus didn't listen and started roaring and spewing fire at everything before Clow in Fujiitaka's body came downstairs and yelled, "Cease that this instant Cerberus, before you burn down the house!" "What?" Cerberus screeched in Clow's general direction. "Didn't you hear him? He called Yue generously endowed!"
Clow then spit out the tea he was sipping and promptly dropped the teacup, using the now empty hand to grab the boy's throat tightly. "And how would you know a thing like that, hm?" Clow asked between gritted teeth. "I was talking about dowries!" Li shouted pitifully. "Don't lie to me! I know that you want him! But you can't have him, he's mine!" Clow shouted before laughing in a high tone mixed between evil and insanity- sounding so very out of place in the gentle Fujiitaka's body. "Crack pot Clow's at it again." Cerberus had long since been released and now looked ashamedly at the reincarnation of his creator as he strangled a ten year old over a misconception. Sighing long sufferingly and deigning to remember that he had acted just as harshly, Cerberus marched away to start scrying for his sibling again so that the household could return to some semblance of normal.
3-Yue hissed in protest to Clow's tactless comment before summoning enough energy in his hand to hit Clow's spirit so hard that it crashed through the wall before storming off in outrage. As Clow's spirit ghosted back in Cerberus turned to him and said, "Maybe I should've punched ya' too. You definitely deserved it…" Before Yue cut in, "Cerberus! Hurry your ass up!" "Coming DEAR!" He shouted back sarcastically before giving Clow a disgusted look and turning on his heel and walking off to join his disgruntled sibling.
Syaoran looked Clow's spirit straight in the eye and said with conviction, "You totally deserved that!" "What, you too now? You're such an ungrateful little descendent." Clow replied hotly. "Baka! Out of all of the animals in the world to choose from you decided to make Yue part cat. CAT! The easiest animal in the world to read! And YOU couldn't even see that your words were insulting him, HURTING him deeply! For gods sakes! His hackles were rising and he was hissing! If you aren't smart enough to shut your mouth at that, then I don't want to be related to you!" And Syaoran then proceeded to stomp out. "I think that he's right." Said Spinnel quietly.
Clow spun around to face him at this and growled out a slightly mumbled, "What!" "You heard me, and don't you dare give me that look! I am not afraid of you Clow. Eriol. Reed and I will treat you like an obstinate child if you continue acting like one!" Clow could only gape like a fish before thought process started to return and he choked out a strangled, "What?" "Go apologize you fool! Your comment obviously made Yue feel unwanted and you need to make up!" Spinnel wasn't taking no for an answer so Clow finally gave in but not with out a few parting words. "I swear, I don't know how Eriol puts up with you! You're worse than Yue, well, almost anyway! He still takes the cake for the most mother hen like. You should really stop that or people might become upset with you." And he said this all with menacing grin still in place as he sauntered out of the room to find the irate moon being not hearing the inaudibly muttered, "Touché", coming from his reincarnation's sun guardian.
4-Eriol was at it again, and for once, Yue felt bad for Li. The reincarnation had been quoting filthy, Chinese pop songs at the poor boy for the last hour and being part Chinese- meaning that he could speak their language and was tired of listening to so many filthy phrases- Yue was officially fed up. Pulling Eriol into the kitchen where no one would catch his words- specifically his Onii-chan- Yue started yelling at him in Chinese. "What are you doing? I should wash your mouth out with soap for the things you've been spouting at that child!"
Eriol chose to respond in Chinese having realized Yue's scheme to keep his mistress unawares. "But Yue-san! It's completely true! I know for a fact that Li-kun is very well endowed! Hm… come to think of it, from Clow's memories, so are you!" Yue blushed red with anger and embarrassment. "Shut up! And how would you know a thing like that? I always knew that you were a pervert but I didn't think that you would actually molest your own descendent, because that's the only way you could know something like THAT!" Yue screamed, appearing affronted and decidedly ruffled. "Come now, you know I wouldn't do a thing such as that! I'll be glad to show you how I know, though."
Yue was about to protest before Eriol roughly groped him, sending Yue into a fit of rage. Slapping Eriol hard across he face Yue cried out, "You disgusting pervert! How DARE you!" Of course, also being Chinese, Cerberus had heard and understood their entire conversation from the comfort of the sitting room and when Yue started screaming in Japanese again, everyone knew what had happened. A moment later found Cerberus' eyes widening, cups and glass decorations shattering under the force of his negative energy; Eriol was dead, so dead. Roaring Kero-chan transformed to Cerberus and he screeched, "How DARE you! Wait 'til I get my hands on you! I'll roast you like the goddamned vulture you are!" And with that, the crimson-eyed guardian beast stormed into the Kinomoto kitchen, knocking the door off of its hinges along the way. Everyone stared mutely at the entrance the beast had just barged through moments ago before their jaws hit the floor as they saw Eriol run through the much abused doorway, a handprint painting his pale cheek a furious red, and being chased by both guardians.
Yue was screaming at Eriol in Chinese intermittent with English and Cerberus was simply screaming, a high-pitched keening that caused all present to feel as if their ears were bleeding. Sakura started to panic when Eriol was chased up the stairs and started frantically calling for Fujiitaka. "Dad! Hurry, Yue-san and Kero-chan are trying to kill Eriol-kun!" Listening for any acknowledgement that her father had heard, Sakura waited patiently, and before long she stood in front of Clow Reed himself. "Just let them be Sakura-san. Eriol inherited my more perverted traits, unfortunately, and it's best to let him learn his lesson." "You were a perv?" Ruby Moon piped up curiously. "Well, I was wealthy, powerful- socially and magically, forever 30 years old and a bachelor. I think I have some right to be called horny."
Clow chuckled at everyone's stumped faces before growing eerily still as he asked, "Is there, by chance, a horribly terrifying demon behind me?" They all shook their heads 'no'. "I see", Clow mumbled. "Is there a thoroughly upset and extremely hormonal moon being behind me then?" They all nodded their head 'yes' as Clow turned around to find Yue giving him a blank, deceptively sweet grin. 'The same expression a maniac gets before killing their victim', Clow thought distractedly as he discreetly loosened his collar. "Hello Yue, long time… no see…" Clow trailed off, terrified by the look he was getting. "Clow…" Yue whispered. "You're an idiot!" And he punctuated this with a solid right-hook to the mage. Panting heavily, Yue bowed his head to stare at the floor, trying to reign in his temper. Standing up while carefully prodding his jaw to assure nothing was broken, Clow said, "Well, after so long I was expecting a warm welcome from you Yue." Yue just clenched his fists and stared at Clow through his bangs. "A warm welcome? A WARM WELCOME! Your blasted reincarnation drives me insane the entire day, starts talking about something that was completely private- when he knew that both Cerberus and Li-sama could hear and understand him, then fucking gropes me! He GROPED me! And YOU want a WARM WELCOME!" Clow laughed nervously while rubbing the back of his head. "Yes." He squeaked timidly. And Yue's short fuse was detonated. Cerberus having caught Eriol joined his brother and Clow outside and they both enjoyed a good beat down, just like the old days. But instead of fighting each other, they were beating on CLOW! They had so much fun.
5- This is where Sakura dies taking down an evil villain and Yue is sent to the bottom of the ocean and Cerberus is sealed inside a dormant volcano. The scene starts where Eriol and his guardians- who have become archeologists- stubble upon Kero's armor and start searching...
"Eriol!" Screamed Ruby Moon as she found something that astonished her. "What is it Ruby?" asked Eriol peering curiously over his moon guardian's shoulder. "It's Cerberus' clasp!" She sang joyfully drawing the attention of her brother Spinnel Sun. "That couldn't be..." He whispered peering at the scuffed up gem.
"Quickly, if we've found his earring, then that means that Cerberus' armor is near by and so is Cerberus." Rushing to dig through the hardened rock from the cooled lava, Ruby found the breast plate of the mighty guardian beast! And Spinnel found the helmet as well! "That's right!" Exclaimed Eriol. "The letter sent to Sakura by Seth (the villain) said that her guardians would die from whence they came!Cerberus was born of fire and Yue of water! Cerberus must be in the volcano! Let's get him then we'll work on Yue alright?" When both guardians chorused 'yes', Eriol raced to the top of the hollow and dead volcano before jumping onto the rock ledges to make his way down the inside with his companions close behind, gliding down on their wings.
Upon reaching the bottom, the trio could hear something they couldn't outside of the rocky 'fortress'. There was a mighty banging under their feet. Looking down, they realized that they were standing on the imprint of Cerberus body as it had made a great hollow in the cooled lava. "Step aside" Spinnel Sun ordered as he blasted a miniscule energy beam at the space. "Hey bastard! You could a' taken my head off!" The errant plush version of Kero shrieked, coming to stare daggers at Spinnel. "So you were alive after all." Spinnel glowered at him. "What a pity." And with that, the two beastial guardians argued the entire way out of the volcano.
"And now..." Cerberus transformed and butted his large head up against Ruby's thigh, silently asking for his armor. Realizing what he meant and that because of the power limiter his master had placed at birth on both he and Yue, he needed his armor to use his powers, she handed it to the massive lion and watched silently as he slipped the fussy thing on. "Now for Yue." Cerberus sighed at this. "I remember where he was dumped, but that doesn't mean that he's still in that spot." "What do you mean exactly?" Asked Eriol with concern. "Well, he could have easily been swept halfway across the world in these past several years, what with the strong Atlantic current." Eriol paled. "Then we had better start looking." Suggested Spinnel. Arriving at the spot that Yue was deposited over the Atlantic ocean, Cerberus and Eriol put up an oxygen enclosing, forever refilling, 'bubble' so that they could breathe as the four dived and swan straight to the bottom. "Look, it's Yue's armor!" Yelled Ruby excitedly. "Yeah, and his judgment robes." Cerberus got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach as he gathered the garments and continued on. Finally the four came across a city.
"Oh my god it's Atlantis!" Spinnel exclaimed excitedly. Kero rolled his eyes and transformed everyone into mer-folk to blend in, suspecting that Yue was in the city. Coming upon the palace, Cerberus gave their name and purpose so that the guards would give them entrance. "His royal majesty, prince Daren!" Announced a guard as they entered. "Ah, so my beautiful angel fish's guardian has finally arrived. Now I can force you to give her away and we may be married and have many guppies! Muahahaha!" He laughed maniacally while Kero sweat dropped. "Over my dead body you bloody sea urchin!" Yue yelled after coming through the coral lined doorway, fuming as if he were an underwater volcano. "And for the last time! I'm a fucking guy!" He yelled irritably at being forced to dress like a mermaid for the past several years. "My love, language!" Chastised the prince, astonished at the moon guardian's foul tongue. " Asshole or not, you really do need to watch your mouth Yue." Said Cerberus, smiling wryly.
"Watch my language? WATCH MY LANGUAGE!" He yelled, jarring pieces of rock loose from the throne room's ceiling. "I have been GAUUCKED at, GROPED, MANHANDLED, AND dressed as a WOMAN! I am DAMN well NOT going to calm the fuck down! NOW, do I make myself PERFECTLY clear!" Yelled Yue while shaking his poor onii-chan. "Sir yes sir!" Said Cerberus with a mock salute. Yue just growled at him before storming from the grounds utterly pissed and leaving his brother to clean up the debris, again.
6-Sakura creates a new card to help Tomoyo get a date for the school dance but it goes horribly wrong and Sakura gets shot by an arrow from the 'Love' card causing her to fall in love with every being she happens to see. The scene starts off with Syaoran throwing away his pride and calling Eriol for help while Yue and Kero try to force through the barrier their love sick mistress had erected using the shield card.
"Keep pushing!" Cerberus yelled at Yue as he forced more of his energy at the barrier. "We need to push harder!" Yelled back Yue. Cerberus complied as Syaoran paced inside the barrier Yue had erected around he and Tomoyo to keep out his delusional mistress. "Syaoran! Just call him already!" Yelled Tomoyo. "But..." The clan head stuttered. "No buts! Now!" She yelled as Sakura started trying to force herself through the barrier again. "Tomoyo-chan!" Sakura cooed! "Come to me my darling! Don't hide from me!" "Ah...!" Tomoyo screamed as Sakura managed to force her hand through, breaking the barrier and grabbing Tomoyo's arm, spreading her 'infection'.
"Oh, Syao-kun!" They both squealed. "Ah... don't touch me!" He yelled before bolting to the corner of the room with the two zombie like females following after him almost drunkenly. Finally giving in, Syaoran sent a mental S.O.S. To Eriol who quickly responded with, 'What seems to be the matter my cute little descendant?' 'Cut the crap creep!' He screamed back through the link while Eriol just raised a mental eyebrow. 'Listen up! You, you're guardians, Sakura's house, NOW!' Eriol was blown back by the force of Syaoran's call but teleported he and his guardians to the Kinomoto home anyway.
Going to the front door, Eriol found that the shield card had been put up, but was very weak now. "Get out of the way!" Someone called from inside of the house just as Eriol and his guardians jumped back to avoid a door to the face as Syaoran, Yue, Kero, and almost all of the Sakura cards came running out of the house screaming. "Run for your lives!" The Fiery screamed as he was grabbed by the tail of his flames and dragged back by Dark who had been taken over by the new card. "NO! FIERY!" Screamed Watery. "YOU BITCH! LOVE! I'LL KILL YOU FOR THIS!" She screamed as Yue dragged the card away from her polar opposite. Eriol just stood there dumfounded for a minute before he looked at the house to see a possessed Tomoyo and Sakura walk out followed by The Light, The Dark, The Fiery, The Shield, and a new card he did not recognize.
The new card was smiling maliciously at him, something definitely out of place on the face of the cute little cherub. Tentatively, Ruby Moon reached out to touch Sakura and ask if she was alright, despite the fact that Yue and Cerberus were begging her not to do so. Because when she touched the possessed child, her body began to shake as her eyes rolled back into her head. Then, it was over and she had rapidly turned around, eyes blank and adoring smile on her face as she looked at a more than slightly horrified Yue. "And now..." She said in a cloyingly sweet tone, "You're mine!" And with that, Yue ran with three of the humanoid cards clutched protectively to his body before the affected moon being could 'sink her teeth' into him. While all of the other 'survivors' ran through the peaceful streets after them, trying to get away form the most awful nightmare of their lives.
I hope that you liked this so far. Please review (: