Following discreetly behind you, I watch you closely as we take our daily walk around Voyager. We've walked the same route for several years now. Always with you slightly ahead, and me about a pace behind.
I'm intrigued with the sway of your hips. Your whole body has such sleek fluid movements. I have to keep reminding myself that I cannot reach out and touch what I desperately dream of touching night after night..
Yes, every night, my dreams are of us. They're not just sexual dreams. Oh, there's plenty of those! They are the dreams that make me wake up completely soaked from head to toe, waking slowly as I call out your name. There are other dreams, mostly of us with children, our children. Always a dark haired boy with brown eyes and a red haired girl with blue eyes are with us as we picnic, swim, ski, all the activities a real family does.
Walking the ship, my mind often wanders, although I try to keep it on track. I watch as we stop by any crew members we pass. I hear your soft voice as you greet them and give each of them the encouragement they need to move forward. I see their smiles as they answer your questions. You leave each of them feeling good about themselves. You have a way about you that makes everyone you meet feel special.
We return finally to the bridge, and you make your excuses to work in the ready room. I take my seat knowing that for a while at least my company is no longer needed.
Time passes slowly as I sit watching the stars whisk by at warp speed. I barely hear the chatter on the bridge as my mind wanders to us, always to us! I keep hoping that someday, someday soon, you'll turn around and look at me. Should I give up that hope and move on? Am I just kidding myself that it will ever happen?