Author's Notes: For the slythindor100 advent challenge. Contains sexual references.
When it came to shopping with Draco, the twice-yearly emotionally fraught shopping sprees that Draco insisted on (because Harry was apparently incapable of clothing himself to Draco's exacting standards) were more than enough to tide Harry over, and then some.
So it really didn't bother him that Draco had never shown any interest in accompanying Harry on his Christmas shopping. If Harry had his way, that would have continued on indefinitely.
Unfortunately, he wasn't really given a choice in the matter.
Draco literally dragged Harry around from the side street (to which he'd just Side-Alonged Harry without actually pausing to ask Harry's permission to Apparate him, mind). It took Harry several moments longer than it should have to recognise the major street they'd stepped onto as Oxford Street, though Harry figured his slowness was mainly because it didn't immediately occur to him that a Muggle shopping district might be somewhere Draco would actually want to spend time.
"You'd make a complete hash of it," Draco was explaining. "There's no way you could ever pull off an acceptable gift on your own."
"Yeah, look, I'm sure that'd be sad for them and all," Harry said sardonically, "but why am I supposed to actually care? It's not like I'm looking to make a good first impression here; it's a bit late for that. Besides, your mother's one thing, but you can't really expect me to willingly spend money on Lucius Malfoy."
Draco sighed long-sufferingly. "Did you miss the part where they've invited both of us over? Even you can't possibly be such a heathen that you'd show up to a formal Christmas Eve dinner empty-handed."
"I don't intend to show up at all!" said Harry. "Why should I? I don't even get why they'd invite me. They never have before. Here I thought we all had some kind of silent understanding to just ignore each other. Can't we go back to that?"
"Look, they're finally making some kind of an effort to accept that we're together," Draco said. "So you should really let me pick out a gift; something Muggle so they don't think to suspect that it's not actually from you, yet still something relatively tasteful so they end up under the mistaken impression that you're not totally a lost cause. And once we get home tonight you should also let me finally teach you some actual table manners; it'll all be for nothing if you make a complete idiot out of yourself right in front of them. With a little bit of that Potter luck of yours, this doesn't have to be as much of a disaster as you seem to think it will. All right?"
"Don't I even get a say about all of this?"
"Well of course. You always have a choice," said Draco. "You can hand over your wallet now and wait here patiently so you don't needlessly get in the way while I go inside and shop on your behalf. Or you can stubbornly refuse to buy a gift and to go to dinner with my parents, and therefore miss out on the astounding blowjob that will await you upon successful completion of your very first Malfoy family dinner. And fair warning, you'll probably also miss out on seeing me altogether at Christmas, if that's your choice. It's up to you."
Harry sighed and dug his hand into his pocket. "The sex had just better be mind-blowing enough to make up for spending a whole night being civil to your father," Harry warned.
"Trust me," Draco replied as he plucked Harry's stash of Muggle money from his outstretched hand, "it most definitely will be, as long as you behave."
Once Draco had flitted off to blow a good chunk of money on something needlessly extravagant that probably wouldn't be appreciated regardless, Harry crossed his arms over his chest and amused himself by surveying the Muggle Christmas lights display suspended over the street and by watching the people rushing around underneath it, desperate to complete their last-minute shopping. He wondered how many of them were also searching for gifts for obnoxious in-laws with a known penchant for bigotry and torture.
God, the things he put up with for Draco. As if dealing with Draco himself wasn't occasionally difficult enough; now his parents were part of the package too?
But, Harry knew, it really didn't matter how high-handed Draco acted, or what other irritations Harry had to suffer through. Harry would voluntarily (if not happily) attend a hundred awkward dinners with people who used to want him dead (and probably still did, truth be told) if that was what was necessary.
Some things were worth that kind of sacrifice.
~FIN~