Half Past Noon - A Tara/Steed Avengersfic
Authors Note: I decided to write a Tara fic before I finished my other story for a couple of reasons. First of all, in the episode "Noon Doomsday" (an homage to the movie "High Noon") Steed explains to Tara that he broke his leg jumping a wall. Somehow that just didn't seem a "glamorous" enough way for Steed to break his leg, so I changed it up a bit. I also wanted to explore Tara's reaction to Steed pulling a gun on her to keep her from going after Kafka, since it was such an uncharacteristic action on Steed's part (technically they lifted that from the movie, but still it didn't fit Steed). So anyway, here's my newest addition to the fanfic arena. Please let me know what you think:)
Don't cry, Tara chided herself, fighting back tears as she drove to the front door of the Ministry clinic where Steed had been recuperating from a broken leg. Whatever you do, don't you dare let Steed see you cry! It had been three days since Kafka's attempt on Steed's life, but to Tara, it felt as thought the whole unfortunate even had occurred a lifetime ago. Before the incident, she had been confident in her ability to protect both herself and Steed when the need arose, but then the unthinkable had happened. Steed had pulled a gun on her to prevent her from going after Kafka and his minions; her reflexes had taken over before she'd given her actions any thought, though, and she'd rendered him unconscious in order to engage the enemy without his interference. It was only after Kafka had been killed and the adrenaline rush had worn off that Tara had allowed herself to question his motives. Would Steed have really shot her? And if he had no intention of doing so, why would he have threatened her in the first place? And how he could he have so little faith in her, when she was a fully trained agent? Was it her youth that he didn't trust, or was it something else altogether different? The hurt and confusion she'd felt since the incident was overwhelming, but she wasn't prepared to confront him just yet. Even so, as she entered the hospital to find him waiting for her, Tara had to force back her tears. Just keep it together and don't cry.
"Good morning, Miss King," Steed cheerfully greeted her, quite oblivious to the pain that she thought could have been noticed by a blind man. "I see you've recovered from our little adventure."
"Oh I'm none the worse for wear," she lied, forcing herself to give Steed a fake smile. She noticed the garish bruise that had fanned out across his temple where she'd hit him and quickly looked away, unwilling to be reminded of her actions. "Are you ready to go?"
"Absolutely! I know this isn't your run-of-the-mill hospital but it's still starting to grate on my nerves."
"Alright then, off we go." Tara wheeled him to the car and saw that he was comfortable before driving away. Although Steed had spent a month at the clinic, he still needed time to completely convalesce, and it would be a while before he could have the cast removed. Despite his protestations to the contrary, Steed needed help to take care of himself, and as his partner the duty was Tara's. She had yet to figure out how she'd keep her emotions in check but simply knew that she had to do so. Doing otherwise would be unfair to Steed, and no matter how deeply he'd hurt her, Tara wouldn't allow herself to recklessly lash out at him. As she drove, she feigned interest in Steed's rather spirited telling of how he'd once broken his ankle playing rugby at Eaton. His tone was light and he was enjoying the reminiscence, further evidence that he was truly unaware of how miserable she felt. Just be strong she told herself and you'll know when the time is right to tell him how you feel.
Forty-five minutes later, they arrived at Steed's flat. Tara pulled up next to his Bentley, which had been the subject of a rather nasty wreck, and the real reason he'd ended up in the hospital. Of course, he'd claimed that he'd broken his leg jumping over a wall; Tara had later found out about the wreck from Mother and has asked Steed about it. He had explained that he tried never to draw too much attention to himself. An agent who did so could jeopardize a case in many ways, becoming a target or making a target of other agents. It was better that nobody knew he had been injured tearing around the low country and chasing the enemy as if he was in a Formula-One race.
"Ah there she is," Steed exclaimed, hobbling over to the car to make sure she had been properly repaired. "As gorgeous as the day I bought her. I'm glad to see the old girl weathered the accident. I wasn't sure she would, you know."
"Oh I know," Tara replied "After I found out about the wreck, the orderlies at the hospital told me you were more concerned about her than yourself. Is it true that you wouldn't let them set your leg until Mother promised the Ministry would take care of her?"
"A man's got to have his priorities, Miss King."
"No doubt," she agreed, "but I suggest that the next time you engage the enemy in a road race you might try staying on the road."
"But Miss King," he protested, teasing her, "that tree just jumped out in front of me!"
"Of course it did," she laughed, grateful for the temporary diversion from her bad mood. "Come on inside, it's too cold to stay out here. There'll be plenty of time to make it up to her later." Ushering him inside, Tara immediately busied herself with making coffee while Steed retreated to his bedroom to change his clothes and shave. When he returned, he found her patiently waiting for him, fixing him a cup of strong coffee with half cream and no sugar, just as he liked it. As she silently handed him his cup, he noticed that her hand was trembling.
"Are you alright? What's wrong?"
"Oh nothing," she lied. "I'm just tired, that's all..."
"Miss King," Steed insisted, "I've seen you tired before, and it's never been like this. You're trembling. Please tell me what's wrong." Her only response was to look away, unable to bear the weight of his gaze as he sat beside her on the sofa.
"Tara, please don't look away. Tell me what's bothering you. We can't keep things from each other if we're to be partners..."
Damn you she thought, her mind furiously racing as he reached out to her, raised his hand to her chin and made her look at him. Damn you for not trusting me, damn you for hurting me, and damn you for being oblivious to it all!
"I can't..." she answered, clenching her teeth to keep from crying."
"Please. I can't help you feel better if you won't tell me what's wrong."
There was a long silence between them as she tried to compose herself and chose her words carefully. When she finally spoke, she asked Steed a simple question, one that caused a single tear to slip down her cheek. "Would you have shot me Steed?"
Steed nearly choked on his coffee, unable to believe what he had just heard. "Why on earth would you ask a question like that?"
"It's a legitimate one, I think," she replied, taking a deep breath so as not to lose her nerve. "if I'd tried to leave instead of hitting you over the head with that blasted champagne bottle, would you have shot me?"
"Heavens no!" Steed was shocked that Tara would ever think such a thing.
"Then why did you pull the gun on me?"
"Miss King," he hastily explained, "I didn't think you appreciated the severity of the situation, and I was running out of options to convince you of the danger you were in. Kafka was one of the most lethal enemies and I didn't want you mixed up in all of that."
"So you'd have let him waltz into the clinic and kill you rather than trust me to defend us both? Steed, I'm not some little girl you have to protect. We're a team. I'm your partner - your equal! We face danger together and we triumph or fail together. Do you have any idea how many people would have given their right arms to work with you? I felt so honored when Mother chose me, Steed. All that matters to me - all that has ever mattered- is your opinion of me and my work. I want you to respect me, that's all I need, really. How am I supposed to feel like I have it when you pulled a gun on me?"
She was crying openly now, the tears flowing as freely as her words had, and Steed, who'd been patiently listening, felt horrible about the incident. He hadn't considered that Tara would take his actions so personally, and he was at a loss for words. "Tara, I think you're overreacting. I never meant..."
"Maybe I am," she angrily interrupted, "but I have to wonder if you'd have ever treated Mrs. Peel like this."
The silence between them was immediate and interminable. Tara didn't exactly regret what she had said, but she wasn't entirely happy with herself for evoking the name of Steed's former partner, either. Whatever his feelings for her had been, it was an unspoken rule between them that the subject of Mrs. Emma Peel was not one to be discussed. To bring her into their disagreement was admittedly hitting below the belt, but Tara didn't care. Her reaction to what Steed had done was indicative of the thoughts she'd been forced to keep to herself since she'd started working with him.
"I'd appreciate it if you would kindly leave Mrs. Peel out of this," Steed icily replied.
"I'm sorry Steed, but I have walked in her shadow since I first started working with you. I don't measure up to her - I know I don't have her intellect or her beauty. I can't throw a man over my shoulder, either, but I do have my own talents, if you'd care to notice them. For God's sake, Steed you trusted her and she's not even one of us! Can't you see why I feel inferior?"
Instead of responding, Steed turned away from her, leaned on his cane and hobbled toward his study, his stiff posture reflecting his anger and disappointment; whether he was angry at her or himself, Tara was uncertain. She thought it to be a little bit of both and hated that their partnership wasn't going as well as she had hoped. As long as Steed refused to accept her as his new partner in the wake of Mrs. Peel's departure, there was very little she could do to convince him to give her a chance. Perhaps having spoken her mind would change their relationship, but as cliched as it seemed, only time could heal the rift between them now that past ghosts had been resurrected.
"I can't be her, Steed," Tara brokenly called out after him, "and you shouldn't expect me to be!"
The room was silent and Tara barely heard the snick of a lock being turned from inside the study, Steed's only indication that he wanted nothing more to do with the situation. Curling up on the sofa, she tightly hugged a pillow and cried herself to sleep, wondering as exhaustion finally claimed her if things would be better when she awoke.