I do not own the Twilight Series.
~Enjoy~
What do you see when you look at me. A monster? Something evil? A curse? My crimson eyes that show you I am a murderer?
I'm sure that whatever you see it isn't pleasant.
In fact, as I stare at myself in one of the ancient mirrors in the castle I can't find a single nice word for myself either.
My eyes combined with my dark hair, wound tightly into a bun are enough to make you cringe. The fierce expression forever plastered on my face is enough to make you run for the exits. The dark cloak and the pain I can inflict upon you keep you from coming back.
I can stare endlessly at myself in the old mirror because I never really take the time to see myself in a physical aspect.
A stray hair is sticking down from my bun and I automatically wind it back in tightly. But today I find myself to be curious so I pull the piece down and let it hang on my cheek. It looks alien and wrong only because it doesn't look like me.
It looks un balanced with only one side undone so I pull a piece out from the other side. My features are still sharp and severe, but less so than I have seen them in two hundred years.
My hand slowly reaches up before I can stop and unwinds the thin band holding back the hair. The dark ringlets plummet downwards and cascade down my back. I look kind of pretty; a word I would hardly ever use much less on myself.
My hands go to work arranging to stiff curls on my shoulders. The hair looks wrong sprayed out on the sinister ashy cloak I wear so I slide it off my shoulders.
I can't help but gasp.
I didn't always want to be like this, I hope you know. I didn't always get joy from causing pain and I'm not sure if I would still be here if it weren't for the forced binding. As far as you know, maybe I never even wanted to be a vampire.
Maybe I had a family and a life that I didn't want to leave. Maybe I had a baby brother and a mother who loved me so very dearly. Maybe I had friends who missed me.
The sight of the girl with the long, dark curls brings back so many memories that if I wasn't sitting, I might have staggered backwards.
"Jane?"
Aro's voice carries through the large, stony castle and within seconds I have my cloak back on and my hair wound tightly.
"Yes master?" I reply because he is now at the door.
"We have some business to attend to. I trust that you are coming?"
For a moment, only a split second, I glance back at myself in the mirror. I have completely transformed from the girl I was seconds ago. I am now Jane of the Volturi. I am a weapon and a valuable one at that. My victims screams send me sheer pleasure like nothing else can.
Perhaps I am cruel. Perhaps I am a monster. I don't really care because I am what I am.
"Yes master. By and by I come."