Author's note: Behold, my newest creation: The Candace Complex!

Phineas and Ferb wonder what makes Candace so stressed out, so they try to find the source of it and put a stop to it. What they don't know is that she's stressed out about them. Meanwhile, Doofenshmirtz tries to win an Inator Raffle Contest with his own creation- the Cheat-Inator! Can Perry stop him before he...uh, cheats.

What happened to when things were really evil?

It was a beautiful summer's morning in Danville, and Phineas and Ferb were making sure to take advantage of it. They were out in the backyard, testing their new mini bungee cords in the tree. Each boy was wearing their helmet-head system, a harness that fastened them securely to the bungee cord, and in Phineas' case, an exhilarated grin.

"Woo-hoo!" he yelled as he shot back up to the top branches of the tree. "This is great!"

Bouncing beside him, Ferb merely gave a shaky thumbs-up to show his approval.

Meanwhile, beneath the shade that the tree provided, Perry watched them descend from the tree, then bounce back up just as quickly as they had come down. He wasn't worried at all for their safety- they had done far more dangerous things than this. However, he was concerned for Candace's sanity over the matter. The boys' sister was inside, shouting into the phone about 'dangerous low-elevation activities' and how Mom needed to come home right that minute (even though she had left for the store mere minutes ago). However, judging by her increasingly hysterical responses, Mom didn't seem to be complying. Eventually, she shouted, "Fine, you don't believe me? I'll show you as soon as you get home! No, better yet…I'll get them on the phone!"

And she dashed out to the backyard, phone and all. However, she had neglected to notice that she wasn't talking into her cell phone- and the living room phone had a cord and plug. As she reached the tree, she held up the phone triumphantly.

"Boys, say hi to Mom for me!" she said, giggling psychotically. Perry surreptitiously scooted farther away from her, just to be safe…you never knew when Candace's 'issues' were going to act up, even when she was acting totally normal.

Phineas and Ferb bounced down from the tree and glanced at the phone. "Candace," said Phineas before he could bounce back, "why'd you bring the living room phone out here?"

As they bounced back up, Candace adopted a smoother tone. "Oh, just so I can finally bust you…now TALK." And she thrust the phone upwards once more.

"You do know it's unplugged," said Ferb placidly as they descended again.

Candace's eyes widened. She retracted the phone and stared at it in horror. The power was completely dead, and as she glanced behind herself, she could see the entire phone set laying in the grass behind her, power cord and all. Her mouth dropped open.

"NO!" she shouted frantically, scrambling to scoop up the phone's various pieces and drag them back inside, the cord whipping away like a cat's toy. Perry eyed it for a moment, then gave up. Chasing power cords so wasn't his thing.

"Hmm," said Phineas, descending once more. "That was odd."

Just then, at the lowest point of their jump, the cords snapped, and the boys fell lightly onto a pile of pillows that they had set strategically beneath the tree.

"Oomph!" cried Phineas as he fell, embedding his large, pointy nose into one of the pillows and narrowly missing Perry, who had settled on one of the outlying pillows.

"Well," said Phineas in a nasally voice, as the pillow was now impaled on his nose, "It's a good thing we put these here. I guess Candace was right…we should be more careful."

Ferb merely raised his hand in a thumbs up from the mass of pillows he had landed in.

After Phineas had removed the pillow from his nose and Ferb had put the remaining cushions away, the boys settled peacefully beneath the tree again.

Phineas sighed. "Half a morning's work gone to waste." Then he pulled out his wristwatch to check the time and smiled. "But we've still got a lot of daylight ahead!"

Ferb nodded in reply and pulled Perry onto his lap, where he yawned and fell asleep. Presently, he was snoring softly and smiling as he slept, which made Phineas laugh. Perry's sleeping habits never failed to amuse him.

"Perry's so cute, isn't he, Ferb?" he said happily, settling on his elbows in the grass to get a better look at his snoozing pet. Ferb nodded and scratched Perry's cheek gently.

Phineas smiled and closed his eyes, slowing his breathing to match Perry's. Ferb copied him and leaned back against the tree serenely. To complete the moment, Perry began to purr in his sleep. For a few precious moments, it seemed as if the world was at peace.

Then the back door flew open with a loud screeching noise and Candace rushed out into the backyard, toting a video camera and giggling psychotically again. At the sound of the screeching door, Perry's eyes flew open and his purring stopped abruptly. The boys' breathing patterns were broken, and their eyes snapped open as well. Perry made an aggravated chirping noise and stalked off of Ferb's lap, shooting what might have been interpreted as a sulky glare at Candace. He then made a wide circle around her and headed back inside with a miffed air. Phineas and Ferb looked slightly downhearted at this, but Candace didn't notice a thing. Instead, she saw that the bungee cords were gone, the large, suspicious pile of pillows she had noticed had disappeared, and the boys were merely relaxing under the tree- albeit with a disappointed air. Of course, this did nothing to improve her mood. Rather, it seemed only to further distress her.

"NOOOO!" she shouted in defeat, sinking to her knees in the grass and dropping the camera. Then she covered her face and sobbed melodramatically.

Phineas watched her for a moment with a wide-eyed stare, then moved forward to comfort her hesitantly. "Um, it's okay, Candace…"

"B-but the bungee cords…" she sobbed as Phineas patted her back. "A-and I saw…"

"Candace, we didn't make them strong enough," Phineas explained. "So they snapped, and we had to throw them out. It's a good thing the pillows were there, eh, Ferb?"

Ferb nodded in agreement, massaging his nose.

Suddenly, Candace's sobs subsided. She stared up at Phineas, a smile starting to stretch across her face again. "Wait. You threw them out?"

"Well, yeah…" said Phineas slowly, not getting her point.

"Are they still in the trash?" Candace pressed eagerly.

"Oh, no," said Phineas, smiling and waving a hand dismissively. "I guess that was the wrong choice of words…we donated them to a local bungee-jumping recycling center. I hope they can put them to a good use."

Candace's face fell. She sighed dramatically, and stood to leave. "I'll just…go."

And she did, with a slumped walk and a despondent air. Phineas and Ferb just watched her go, not comprehending the source of her misery.

"Well," stated Phineas plainly. "I guess we should get back to our daily doings."

Ferb gave him a questioning glance. Phineas sighed.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he conceded. "We haven't got any doings yet. We've just been relaxing with Perry and wondering why Candace is so miserable…hey!" he suddenly perked up. "Ferb, I think I know what we're gonna do today!"

Then something else occurred to him. "Hey, Ferb, I know Perry's annoyed 'cause of Candace and all, but you don't think he's just off sulking, do you?"

Ferb shook his head.

"Nope, didn't think so," said Phineas. "I wonder where he is, then."

So that's chapter one! Perry and Doofenshmirtz will appear in the next one, and so will Phineas and Ferb's crazy plan. So stay tuned!