I'm sure you've heard it before. Boy meets girl, girl likes boy, girl doesn't stand a chance, and by
some miracle girl gets boy. Right? Right. It's cliché. So why would I change it. Hence why I'm
here. The awesome narrator. The beautiful cool narrator here to bring you a…not to awesome
story. Oh well at least I'm getting paid.…I am getting paid right? Hey you back there I am getting
paid, right? Yeah that's what I thought. Okay so now that we have that straightened out let's begin.
Perhaps I should tell you why they picked me to narrate. I mean I am awesome, but there' more.
You see in this story there happens to be two heroines. Yup that's right two. And well I happen
to…. well.…Ihappentobetheirsister. What you didn't catch that. Oh great the producers are making
me say it again. Okay so I.…happen to be their….gulps sister. Oh I know it's terrible. I mean how
can I, the awesome, beautiful, cool narrator be related to.…to….them. I mean don't get me wrong
their not that bas they do have their good moments, especially when I stand next to this I look even
more awesome. What! Wait say it again….Oh right. Sorry the producers are yelling at me. Man they
are so rude. Well I seem to be straying from the point. So sine I happen to be related to our two
heroines who better to tell the story. I mean I did have to live through it, right up to the mushy
gooey lovey stuff. Shudders And they did repeat it to me over and over and over and over…Trails
off What? Oh right. Okay it's time to being.
So latmkjy Sorry my mouth seems to have gone at the sheer terror of telling the story. Breaths
deeply Let me introduce you to the heroines. Numero uno: Erin. She's only 17 and is tall. Now
when I say tall I mean tall, she's like big foot, like a tree, like…like…Oh I got one like the empire
state building. You get my point, right? Right. Okay so anyways. She's got this blonde brown hair
and green eyes that change in the light, or so I've been told over and over by someone. Anyway she
looks nothing like anyone in my family, so we tell her that she's adopted. Begins laughing
hysterically It's so funny. What don't look at me like that. It's not like she is. Stop! Goodness no
sense of humor. Alright. Numero dos: Chelsea. She's….let me count….mumble to herself
eighteen….plus two.…minus one….15, yeah 15 that's it. Okay so she has brown hair and brown
eyes. We've been told that she looks like me which sounds to me like a compliment, but apparently
it's not. So besides that she's pretty normal. Except for the part that she's the devil. What I mean to
say is that she has the worst temper. When she gets mad I run for the hills, at least had far as I can
get cause man shudders I'm scared just thinking about it. So there they are. Dumb and Dumber.
Stupid and Stupider. Retarded and Retatdider…is that even a word? I wonder. Okay I guess I can
begin now. So I should warn you. If you are faint of heart, pregnant, or just can't stand mushy,
gooey, lovely stuff leave. Now while you can.
In fact can you take me with you?
Please?
No?
Fine.