All things Twilight belong to SM and I'm not interested in stealing them. I'm just a borrower.

Chapter One

I had a dream once; it stuck with me for years. I stood in the sun, while the warmth sunk to my core and my hand held the tiniest hand I'd ever seen. In this dream, I stared at the young woman next to me in awe. Her face was too small for her eyes and her hair sprung out in so many directions it made me dizzy. We never talked or moved. We just were.

Then I woke up and her face was gone.

The moment my eyes opened I knew it was only a dream and no one would ever see me the way she had. I looked around my bare room and sighed. It was enough to fill me with despair. The smell of antiseptic was enough to gag me but I knew it was real and I was real.

"You have to join the real world, Jasper."

"Pain is evident; it's how you deal with it that makes the difference."

The state paid people to sit and talk with me an hour a day. We went round and round in circles around what was really wrong with me. They gave my feelings large, almost idiotic scientific names. The more I felt like a science project, the faster I died inside. So…I told them what they wanted to hear.

"I should love myself. Hurting myself isn't the way to solve things."

As soon as whatever asshole was assigned to me that week set me free, I practically ran back to my room to collapse on the bed and think about how broken I really was. No one knew why, hell I had no clue myself. All the right parts were there; something was just wired wrong.

One more day and I would be set free from the small two story hospital I'd been in since I was fifteen. My parents had, in so many words, washed their hands of me the day I was admitted. I knew if I kept my shit together the state would cut me free at eighteen.

The day I signed my exit papers and walked from the hell hole I'd spent three years in my life changed forever. As deep and profound as that sounds, it didn't happen all at once. Things happened in small increments to the point, I didn't even realize.

I lived in a shitty one room apartment above the Goodwill store in a no name town in Texas. The shock of being totally and completely alone didn't start to wear on me until my second week of freedom. My mind worked on a routine and without the routine I had plenty of time to think about my life. Sleep was difficult without the medication I was given in the hospital and I found it hard to get to my job every day. I bagged groceries at the local A & P Tuesday through Saturday. My boss was an ass and I wanted nothing more than to punch him in his wrinkled face.

Every night was the same and the repetition was probably good for me but who wants that? No one wants a cookie cutter life with predictable fucking moments around every corner. At least, I knew I didn't.

Every Sunday I walked across town to a little pizza joint and had the special and then I would walk home to watch television until my brain went numb. All of that changed the night I met her.

My feet slid easily along the broken pavement on the street outside of my apartment. The Goodwill store was closed on Sundays so my reflection in the glass window refracted back at me more prominently than usual. Every now and then I glanced over at myself. I saw her, her reflection right behind mine and it startled me. I spun around to face the girl.

"Are you following me?" I questioned her. I knew her immediately; the big eyes and dark messy hair.

"You work at the A & P," she said with a devilish smile. She circled me once, taking me in. "My name's Alice."

"Jasper." I took the hand she was offering and shook it lightly. She made me nervous, as if she knew everything I was going to say before it left my mouth.

"It's nice to meet you Jasper. Do you live around here?"

"You sure ask a lot of questions." I gestured around with my right hand. "You never answered my question. Were you following me?"

The corners of her mouth turned down slightly. "No. I wasn't following you."

I studied her then. She was tiny but full of life. She wasn't anything like her unofficial twin from my dream and that disappointed me. I could almost smell the intent of trouble coming off her in waves. My instincts were screaming to stay away but my mind, which wasn't all that healthy, told me I wanted her. My body definitely told me I wanted her.

"Alice," I stepped closer to her, "are you here to keep me company?"

She smiled and her red lips parted. "I don't do one night stands, Jasper."

The conversation was easily the strangest I'd ever had. "Then come back tomorrow night too."

"Lead the way." She motioned me forward with her hand.

I was nervous to say the least. For some reason my mouth had moved and I'd had an odd conversation with Alice but nothing said was anything I'd ever said before…to anyone. She evoked a dark spirit in me and as wrong as I knew it was, I loved that feeling.

I shivered in excitement as Alice and I entered my shitty apartment side by side. My hands, of their own accord, pressed her against the wall and I forced my mouth on to hers. She wrapped her short legs around my waist and as I felt around blindly to remove her panties I realized she wasn't wearing any. All I could manage to comprehend was her panting and moaning in my ear for me to fuck her, so I obliged. Without even bothering to remove any clothing I unzipped my pants and pressed myself into her.

Alice cried out as I rammed her into the wall over and over but it was in pleasure. I didn't stop until we'd both reached a climax. The gentleman in me wanted to apologize and I did try but she quieted me with her index finger.

"Your place is charming," she said, hopping up on my counter.

All I could think about was her lack of underwear and her freshly fucked bare vagina contaminating my eating space. "Could you not sit on my counter, Alice?"

"You're just a little off, Jasper. Are you aware of that?"

She had quite the nerve. "Don't you think that's the pot calling the kettle black?"

Alice hopped down off the counter and straightened her skirt. "What does it matter to you anyway? We don't know each other, clearly. For some reason you thought I was important enough to stick your dick in but I can't sit on your counter afterward?" She began to circle me. "I know all about you Jasper…you're a ward of the state and they released you from that shithole hospital because they didn't want to feed your crazy ass anymore. They claim you're sane and healthy but I think you're bat shit crazy and could off yourself at any moment."

"How the hell do you know so much about me?" I yelled.

She grinned and moved until there was hardly any space between us. "I just know how it all works, OK? You're just like the rest of us they shoved out when you finally hit legal age. Lucky for you, I like crazy and I like you."

"Tell me Alice, why would you pick this God forsaken town to visit?"

She smiled lazily and ran both hands through her black hair. The red on her nails was a sharp contrast to the ebony of each strand. "I sing. I travel with my friends and we go where our hearts tell us."

I scoffed. "Your heart told you to follow me around huh?"

Alice turned and walked to my front door. The smile remained on her face as she turned back to me. "The heart knows what the heart wants, Jasper." She pulled a flyer from her pocket and let it flutter to the floor. "I'll see you again soon."

She was a level of crazy even I couldn't comprehend. I stood in shock for a good ten minutes after she disappeared from my place. The front door was wide open but I couldn't bring myself to care. I'd just had sex with the girl from my dreams but she'd just had sex with a stranger. What does that say about me? More importantly…what does that say about her?

That girl was a piece of work…just like me.

Sleep was futile that night. I spent most of the dark hours tossing and turning. I could still feel her and smell her. Alice had definitely succeeded in gaining my interest.

Around dawn I pulled myself out of bed and stumbled through my apartment toward the kitchen. My foot kicked something in the dull light. I bent over to pick it up; realizing that it was the flyer Alice had dropped on my floor. I studied the odd shapes and designs all around the edge of the neon pink paper. Apparently Alice was in a band and I'd made up my mind to go see her.

~I I I I I~

Texas wasn't much on the sort of music Alice's band played and I knew that for a fact. The location of the club they were playing was observation number one. It was on the edgier side of town with a front wall full of nothing but decrepit, faded flyers for shows long gone. The alley I had to pass through to get to the bar's door smelled like piss. Unfortunately the inside wasn't any better.

I stepped inside and lit a cigarette.

"I knew you'd show up," Alice said showing up out of nowhere.

I gave a halfhearted shrug. If I played it mysterious I wouldn't look so fucking desperate. "I didn't have anything else to do…and I like rock."

She smirked and tilted her head slightly. The hoop earring hanging from her left ear dangled around wildly from the movement. "Well then…have a good time and I'll see you after?"

I nodded, taking a drag of my smoke. I watched her walk off before taking in the other patrons in the bar. It was a varied but sparse crowd. I caught sight of Alice talking animatedly to a couple guys, likely from her band, in the door to the back of the stage. I watched her, thinking about her skin against my inner thighs as I fucked her. My manners and morals were alive and active but something stopped me from caring when it came to Alice.

An undetermined amount of time later, the act took the stage. My eyes followed them as they all took their places. They were like most bands I'd heard of or listened to before but Alice made all the difference.

"You must be Jasper."

I looked to my right. A girl stood there next to me, her hair held back with a paisley scarf and an overnight bag on her arm. "Friends with Alice?"

She nodded and smiled. "I'm Bella. I'm with him." She pointed to the tall, bass player who was paying her no mind at all.

I surveyed her appearance once more. "Groupie?"

"We find that term offensive, Jasper."

"We?"

Bella pointed to a blonde just off stage, watching the drummer as if she were about to eat him. "Rosalie and I, find the term groupie offensive."

"What the fuck do you call yourselves then?" I was amused by the whole conversation.

"Part time girlfriend…fuck buddy."

The way she rolled her tongue against her lips when she talked made me want to light another cigarette. "He doesn't look too involved," I said nodding toward the bass player.

"His name's Edward and trust me Jasper, when my clothes come off, he's involved."

I never understood these chicks who worshipped greasy rock stars, high off their asses. They followed them around from city to city, parting their legs on command. Of course, I couldn't say a thing because I had thoroughly fucked Alice against the peeling paint on my wall after knowing her for five minutes.

"So tell me, Bella. How does Alice know so much about me?"

Bella chuckled and pulled out a cigarette of her own. I whipped my lighter from my back pocket and lit it before she could. "She used to have these weird dreams about you. I think it's crazy but here we are and here you are."

That threw me off a bit. There was some crazy shit going on; shit I was far too slow to comprehend.

"Well, I'm headed out," Bella said. She waved at me over her shoulder.

It took me a moment to realize the band had finished and I was standing in the middle of the bar like an idiot.

A/N: I'm almost sure, leaving a review is the only way you will get more of this twisted story. ;)