Disclaimer : Nope. Never.


A/N : It's been incredibly long, I know. Sorry about that! This is something I wrote in the spur of the moment, haha. I love Hotaru, I honestly do, but she was the only character in GA who I thought suited this role.


Heartless

He lost his soul to a woman so heartless.

~(*)~

People always told him that Hotaru Imai was no good for him. Sure, she was gorgeous, smart, tall — the list of her materialistic attributes could probably go on, but she had no soul. Yet despite the warnings he received from his friends, he was still bent upon chasing her.

He always put her on a pedestal, far above the rest. He'd do anything for her, from the small things such as carrying her books (she always carried many with her) to a few bigger ones such as allowing her to take embarrassing pictures just to blackmail him with. He did all of this without any hesitation—he was infatuated with her and his whole body yearned for her.

After months of trying to pursue her, things finally worked for him. He couldn't believe his ears when she said yes to her. He was sure he was dreaming, it was too good to be true.

And it was.

The few months that he had spent with her changed him. He no longer conversed with his friends and his thoughts were always preoccupied by one thing: her. Of course his thoughts had been engaged by her before too, but she wasn't the only thing on his mind. He worried about other things previously, but now all of that was gone. It was only her in his system. Everything he did was for her. Only her.

He breathed for her, dreamt of her, and sacrificed himself for her. And she? She gave absolutely nothing in return. It didn't come upon as a surprise to his former friends when they learnt that she had left him for some unbeknownst reason. It was only when he was all alone in his three-star dorm on a Saturday evening in the month of June, that he realized just how stupid he had been. He'd lost himself to some girl who didn't even give two shites about him.

He shook his head mournfully.

Damnnit.

He let out a rattled breathe and plunged down onto a chair. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen which had been lying on the table and began scribbling furiously.

H-

I've been dying on the inside for the past few days trying to figure what I did wrong but then I realized it wasn't me. It's you. It's always been you.

I only just realized this. I've always put you on some sort of pedestal, always put you above the others because I thought you were different and down to earth. I thought that you were the epitome of perfectness and that you could do nothing bad. But I was wrong about that. So so wrong. I've been so biased about you and it's only now that I've noticed your true colours.

When you said yes to me, I thought my life was complete. I had always wanted you and now that I'd finally gotten you, I was ecstatic. I thought that my life couldn't get any better now that you were by my side. I began drifting apart from my friends since I always put you first. At that time, I was just a lovesick fool, putting the girl who I thought was 'the one' on top. I hadn't thought much of it, because you were the most important thing to me but now, that I look back, I curse myself for being so damn stupid.

I'm actually happy that you decided to break things off with me. Because of that, I came to my senses. I was acting so dumb. You clearly did not care about me as much as I did about you. It felt like I was the only one trying to make an effort. Now the question is, why did you even say yes to me in the first place? You knew that you didn't like me much, so why say yes? Did you think that your feelings would develop eventually? Or did you just like the fact of having a boyfriend? Or did you just like playing around with me? It doesn't matter what your reason was because in the end you dumped me and gave me no proper reason for that at all.

I'm glad that you're not in my life like that anymore, because now I know what the actual important things are. You're not one of them and you never will be.

So thanks for making me into a stronger person, I've definitely learnt a lot. I've learnt not to trust people like you, so really, thank you for opening my eyes. I honestly don't know what was wrong with me, I guess that's just the effect of being with you; you bring out the worst in people.

Maybe it's wishful thinking on my part, but I hope that you'll lose your soul to a man someday who will not give you the time of the day. It will probably not happen, since things like that never happen to you, do they? But let's just wait a few years and see.

I know I'm a bit broken inside but that will all be fixed soon. I'll be whole again, I don't know exactly when, but I will be.

-R

P.S You know you'll never find anyone better than me. No one else will be willing to work with a girl with commitment issues. Have fun leading a whoring life.

~(*)~

Hotaru smirked as she dropped the letter into the fireplace. She watched as it crumbled to mere dust.

He was wrong.

She may be heartless but his soul belonged to her.

Only her.

Always and forever.


Carolle Royale