Hello, Readers! This is JZTSmokenem speaking! This here is my first Lego Movie fanfic and its loosely based off the Smosh video. its eheavily inspired to a certain DeviantArt picture that involves Batman taking selfies. Enjoy!
*In the intro...*
Batman's Voice in the background comes out and said, "But first, let me take a selfie...BECAUSE I'M BATMAN...!" Unikitty's Voice (in anger mode) screamed in the background too, "YOU ARE GOING TO BE FRIENDLY!"
*Begins with Batman in a chat room; after seeing a "My Strange Addiction" sign...*
Batman speaks, talking to the camera, "Hello. I'm Batman; The Dark Knight of Gotham City. Anyway, I'm been hearing that everyone's saying that I'm having an addiction to taking selfies. *scoffs* Yeah right...They must been addicted to being stupid because I hardly take any selfies. Me; the Batman; takings selfies whatever I go. Typical."
*Batman is seen carrying a Lego I-Phone and taken a selfie six times, with many expressions on his face.*
* Next scene cuts to Emmett, who is building a Lego Mars Mission set, but minorly realized that his hand is on fire.*
"Batman's best friend and fellow Master Builder Emmett is the only one that knows the full extension of Batman's problem." Vitruvius's voice (as the Narrator) speaks
*Scene cuts to Emmett heading to Bricksberg with Justice League friends.*
"He invited us over to Bricksberg to see if we can help before Batman's addiction goes too far." Vitruvius's voice continues talking.
*Emmett appears in the Chat Room, additionally with many Batman selfies.*
"Okay, hold on there. How is Batman my best friend? I barely even know him throughout the comics I've read. But anyway, yes. He's is definitely addicted to taking selfies. I mean, everyday, he taking various pictures of himself and fighting crime in Gotham, thus sometimes along with Robin. I really don't blame Tim Drake for being manipulated by Bruce. And whenever he's not with the Justice League or Bricksberg, he sometimes take selfies with random female villains and ex-lovers everywhere he goes." The master builder speaks with a understanding face.
*Scene cuts to Batman tie-roping Catwoman with her whip , much to her dismay*
The Dark Knight rapidly setting up Catwoman next to him, getting ready to take a picture with his phone. He said with a big smile while hold the whip tight, "Alright! Time to get on with my "Nice Kitty" selfie!" This put a big shock and cringe into Selina. She asked Batman with a weeping face and fright, "Batman, this is not what I meant for being a cat toy! Let me go!"
"SHUT UP, CATWOMAN! I'M BATMAN...!" Batman said as he taken a selfie.
*Scene shows "Nice Kitty" Selfie*
*Screen turns black, white words appears with the Narrator's voice*
"Batman spends 17 hours a day deciding which filter he's going to use. That's over 6000 hours a week. That's almost the same height as a Lego Brontosaurus; if we have one though." Vitruvius's voice continues.
*Scene cuts to Emmett, with this time Superman sitting next to him*
"I'm just afraid of that his problem is spiraling out of control." Emmett continues talking with a disappointed Superman next to him.
"Exactly!" Superman agreed with a anger tone. "This is definitely not like Batman! He was supposed to be THE Dark Knight! Not a reckless maniac taking random pictures everywhere he goes saying 'I'm Batman' all the time." Both Emmett and Superman looks at their left and sees Batman, whom's about to take another selfie. "Emmett and Superman talking smack!" He yelped as he takes a selfie, much to the duo's dismay. The Man of Steel steps in and said with irritation, "This is ridiculous. And that's not even the worst part. He's even taking part of all the stupid new selfie trends."
"NO DUH!" Emmett screamed in disgust.
*Several scenes shows Batman at his worst with his selfie taking*
*On top of a building near Ace Chemicals...*
"#AfterBangingHarleyQuinn!" Batman said as he's done messing with Harley on top of a building in Gotham and taken a selfie while tea-bagging her. "Mister J! Where are you?!" The jester scream in fright, hoping her Puddin' will arrived.
*Inside the Gotham Bank...*
"#AfterBeatingUpRiddler!" Batman said after taken a selfie and facing Riddler in Gotham Bank, who is stepped in rope. "Riddle me this, Batman. WHY ARE YOU SO ADDICTED TO TAKING SELFIES?!" The Riddler shouted in confusion.
*In Metropolis...*
"#AfterChillenWithLoisLane!" Batman said with a confused Lois Lane in his arm and taken a selfie. "What is wrong with you?!" The news reporter asked.
*Inside Arkham Asylum...*
"#SeeingJokerBehindBars!" The World's Greatest Detective said taking four selfies near Jack Napier's cell. "Geez, Batman. Too much picture taking is bad for you!" The Joker spoke next to him, with a worried look on his face.
*Wyldstyle appears heading inside Bricksburg in her motorcycle*
"In a act of desperation, Emmett has enlisted Batman's Hot Ex-Girlfriend to help with the intervention." Vitruvius's voice continued. Hearing this, Emmett said in offense, can't believe that the narrator just said that, "Lucy is MY Girlfriend, not Batman's, alright?!" Batman appears next to the Master Builder and scoffs in disgust, "Oh please, Emmett! I don't need her anymore. I already got myself a woman. And that is Wonder Woman!" The Dark Knight brings Diana over for a selfie. This made both Superman and Emmett major irritation as he said when taking it, "#GotAHotChickWho'sMoreHotterThanEmmetts!" Wonder Woman sighs in disbelief, "How long is Batman going to be like this?"
"Not for long..." Both Emmet and Superman said in disbelief too.
*Screen turns black again*
,"They've asked us to leave the room, so they can have a heart-to-heart chat with Batman. But we stayed in the room anyway." Vitruvius's voice continues as the scene goes on.
*Scene shows both Emmett and Wyldstyle inside Emmett's House*
Getting more worried that the selfish obsession is taking over the Dark Knight's life, Emmet says to Batman with a concerned look on his face, "Batman, you have got to get your addiction under control. Yes, you may be the Batman, but this is way TOO FAR!" Not paying attention to the obivous, Batman looks at Emmett with a stern face and walks up to him with a irritated face, "SCREW YOU! In fact, its time to make a "Screw You" selfie! BECAUSE I'M BATMAN...!"
*clicks phone*
"This is getting out of hand." Wyldstyle sighed with a face-palm as see watches the coversation. "Come on, Bruce! Please stopping making selfies with yourself." Emmett said in stern after Batman taken a selfie, hoping that the obsession would stop. "Both of us are here because we want to help you..."
"FINE, "Dad"!" The Dark Knight cuts off in anger. "I'll stop taking selfies."
"Give me the phone, then." Emmett said, wanting his friend to pass over the Lego I-Phone. "Thank you." Finally, the Caped Crusader gives Emmett the phone in hesitation, and the Master Builder walks away. Noticing that Batman's slipping, Lucy walks to him and said seeing another phone, "And that one..."
"Darn.." Batman sighed, feeling hopeless as Wyldstyle takes the phone and walks away.
*Black screen returns*
"Batman has taken 565 gigabytes of selfies. If gigabytes were Lego pieces, you could use them to create a house or whatever you desire. Legos aren't made of metal and that really confuses me." Vitruvius's voice continues as the scene heads to Emmett and a familar cop next to him.
*Good Cop/Bad Cop appears with Emmett in the Chat Room*
Emmett spoked with minor irritation, trying to not sound so stubborn. "Well, Batman's rehab is going...kinda...let's see..." GC/BC cuts in and said in rage, "LIKE GARBAGE!"
*Scene shows Emmett and Batman in Lego New York City with The Avengers*
The Avengers were getting ready for a group photo. Emmett and Batman were there to take a picture, but the problem is that Batman is hesitating really hard. "Okay, Batman. All you have to do is to take a good group picture like a actual normal person would." Emmett said as he set up the I-Phone.
In response of this, The Dark Knight begins to hesitate even more. His addiction is taking over his mind and behavior. Much to his cringing, he said in rejection, "I CAN'T!" Batman takes the phone by force and sets himself right next to the apparently surprised Avengers and said, "#IWithTheAvengersInNewYorkCitySelfie!" He clicks the phone, taking a selfie again. Deadpool appears next to Emmett and said in disappointment, "Man...The so-called World's Greatest Detective is the World's Greatest Punk."
"You think?" Emmett responded back. "More like a total maniac photographer if you ask me." Spider-Man swooped next to the duo in agreement.
* Scene shows the duo in the Lego Shire...*
Emmett has decide to take a photo of Batman in between Frodo and Samwise at The Shire. The Master Builder said as he about to take a picture, "Okay, So I just have to take a picture of you with a couple of Hobbits, alright?" Once again, Batman rapidly shove both Frodo and Sam to a bush nearby and used in grapple hook to reel in Arwen out of nowhere in major hesitation, much to Emmett's surprise. He said with a whimper after he grabbed her in his arms, "#ICan'tStop." The hesitating Crusader has taken another selfie once more. Gandalf asked Emmett with a unamused face, "Is your friend ever gonna get over his addiction?"
"I hope so, Gandalf." Emmett said with a face-palm.
*Screen turns black once again*
Vitruvius's voice continues speaking probably for the final time, "As a last ditch effort, Emmett thas decided to offer 6 Lego Brick dollars to make Batman stop taking selfies. I like taking baths with seven hot Lego alien women..." Vitruvius stops taking in the narrator voice and asked in irritation as he seen the subtitles, "Oh my gosh, Benny! Stop writing this nonsense!" Benny's Voice in the background said in response, feeling guilty "Sorry! I just love SPACESHIPS!" President/Lord Business's voice comes in and said in disbelief, rolling his eyes of the astronaut's error, "That's what happens when you leave a astronaut in charge of the dialogue. We should've hired the alien guys from Mars Mission to do it!"
*Scene cuts to Emmett with so many Lego pieces with the Justice League, setting up a Lego set*
"Okay, everyone!" The Master Builder said to the superheroes as the set the parts of one of the most famous sets. "I think these are enough pieces to build a.." He stops taking to them and finds out that Batman puts his head is a decapitation set, which made everyone to gasp. He said in surprise and fright, "WHAT ON BRICKSBURG ARE YOU DOING?!"
"What? I'm gonna cut my body off to take a selfie of my head just rolling around. Get it?" Batman says as he about to "kill" himself. "#AfterCuttingOutMyOwnHeadOffSelfie!"
"STOP!" Wyldstyle shouted in restrain. "If you don't do this, I'll actually will get back together with you."
"WHAT?! REALLY?!" Emmett yelped in surprise and minor heartbreak. "Really?" Batman asked with a smile after getting his head out. "HECK NO!" Lucy said in rejection. "I loved Emmett more!"
"It's true, Bats." UniKitty said in agreement.
This made The Caped Crusader to start feeling ashamed of himself. He finally realizes that he's been addicted of taking selfies to too long. He wished he really shouldn't done that to begin with, since he caused this problem in the first place. Emmett walks next to him and said, "Batman, this time, you've taken too far. You're about to take away your own life, all because of a selfie. #Don'tDoThisPlease."
"But...all I ever wanted is to find some actual romance in my life. I don't want to die alone...! And I guess I shouldn't drank in a cafe somewhere. #ForgiveMeForMyActionsFriends." Batman said in sadness. "At a cafe?" The Flash asked in confusion. "So no wonder why you're been acting like this!" Superman said as he hovers down to Batman. "The coffee must have intoxicated your brain and made you into a hyperactive maniac. That's explains a lot."
"Yeah." Robin comes out of the crowd with Alfred and Batgirl and said in suggestion next to Emmett, "Batman, are you going to promise not to take another selfie again?"
"Are you?" Emmett asked as he open his arms out for of a hug. "YES!" The Dark Knight said with whimper as he ran to Emmett and the other Crusaders in a great big hug. This made everyone around them to cheer and applause. As that happens, Emmett has proud of Batman for getting over his addiction to taking selfies.
*In The Chat Room...*
Emmett said with a big smile on his face, "You know, I'm so glad that Batman has finally gone over his addiction. Maybe now he can focus on our favorite activity that we like to do together: Building different sets for everyone around the world. And sometimes, create other things that we like to do for fun."
*In the Lego Krusty Krab...*
Everyone inside the restaurant is having a party of Batman's former addiction. This party was thrown by none other than Spongebob Squarepants (or Spongebob LegoPants). Emmett and Spongebob were sitting on the chairs, hanging out with their drinks. "Thanks for the party, Spongebob. I really appreciate it." The Master Builder said to the Lego sponge as he drinks his punch. "You're welcome, Emmett. It was my pleasure to start this great celebration of Batman's rehab." Spongebob pleaded in happiness. "And I hope he's happy for stopping it."
"Sure he is." Emmett said as he looks at Batman in the crown, dancing with the Ninjago group and the Legends of Chima. "He's having a great time. And thanks for finding a new song. That usual song is getting more hard-headed as I thought."
"I know, right? Hahahahahahaha!" Spongebob chuckled in agreement.
*Black Screen comes back for the final time*
"If you know someone who's addicted to taking selfies, please send them this message before it's too late. Or just tell them to stop being such a narcissistic maniac." Vitruvius's voice says for the final time.
Okay, that is it for this one-shot. Of course, this fanfic is based off a Smosh video where Anthony is addicted to taking selfies. Please leave a message or comment. PEACE!