Disclaimer: This account does not own "Naruto".
Preface: "Shiyou Kunoichi" is a light-hearted comedy that primarily revolves around Hatake Kakashi and Haruno Sakura.
Shiyou Kunoichi
Chapter One
The 'Shiyou Kunoichi' was a team that most young girls in Konoha strived to be a part of. It enhanced one's worth as a kunoichi if ever accepted as an affiliate. In essence, the title wasn't originally a promotion, but it was deemed highly enough by the village elders to eventually become one. Now, it was the highest rank a lady ninja could formally achieve after jonin/ANBU, second only to the title of Hokage. As a child, Sakura dreamed of becoming a member of this exclusive group of elite shinobi. They were the strongest, the smartest, and the most revered female ninja of the village.
But to even be considered was a difficult task in itself since the group only consisted of ten members. Those who retired or left the Shiyou were respectfully replaced by Konoha's newest aspiring kunoichi. One benefit of being a member was the entitlement to engrave one's name on the Tablet of Konohagakure. To do so on that golden plaque outside of the Hokage's building was to guarantee that a kunoichi's existence became a village legend.
This was the easiest way a female ninja could make their mark in history.
The director of the board changed every decade, and only she had the authority to consider a fellow female jonin or ANBU. As far as Sakura knew, Mitarashi Anko assumed Tsunade-shishou's ten-year reign as the board's director some two years ago. She also knew that Kurenai, along with three other kunoichi including Kiba's mom Tsume Inuzuka, retired from the guild shortly after Tsunade stepped down. So in light of these circumstances, Anko was now in the position to elect possible candidates for the five empty seats.
Haruno Sakura was one of them.
"As I'm sure you already know there's a devastating shortage in the Shiyou Kunoichi." Anko steadily paced the room, staring each of the kunoichi down with individual importance. Standing to Sakura's left were Ino, Hinata, and TenTen: all of whom graduated to the status of jonin last year. Behind them were a group of ANBU women who Sakura didn't recognize. "As the director, I have the privilege of assigning each of you with 'the Task'. If you complete 'the Task' before the end of this month, you will be accepted into the club to fill in the vacancy."
Sakura already suspected that this was somewhat of a sorority. A kunoichi was selected only if the president was fond of her, which was already bias, and was admitted only if an assigned task was completed. The tasks were entirely determined by the club's director, which meant missions varied depending on the director's personality. They could be dangerous, simple, tedious, or in some cases, even hysterical. Anko, being the most perverted kunoichi in the village, was expected to dish out an equally perverted mission.
"So, let's get down to business." She began roughly. "Please raise your hand if you've never had sexual intercourse yet."
Just as they expected.
Most of the women blushed fiercely, Sakura included; but none raised their hand. Even Hinata, who they suspected was a virgin, kept her hands to her sides. Shizune, who was sitting between Hana and Yugao, shifted uncomfortably behind the table. Shizune had only joined the panel a year ago, Sakura recalled.
"Good," Anko grinned boyishly. "Because if you're not interested in surrendering your body to the possibility of some fun sex, then I suggest you leave now."
None of the ANBU women left. Hinata, however, was about to leave with a tremendous crimson blush spreading wider across her face. Unfortunately, TenTen and Ino kept her grounded to the spot. All of them, however, wondered if the director of Shiyou was actually being serious.
"Uhmm, Anko-san, is this really appropri-" Sakura was immediately cut off.
"Shut it Haruno before I change my mind about you." Anko snapped. She quickly picked up again. "Second requirement: if you never had a jonin as a sensei before, you need to leave." Only two of the ANBU women stepped out of the room, leaving five to stay behind. Sakura assumed that the ANBU women who stayed were chunins at some point.
"So we're down to nine. Not bad, not bad." Anko laughed mischievously. "Alright women, your task is simple. I won't be putting your lives on the line since there's already a shortage of kunoichi in this village." She walked imperiously towards them. "Your mission," she began, "is to obtain your sensei's underwear."
"What?!"
"You heard me. The jonin sensei you had as a chunin is your target. Keep in mind that the only proof I need is their underwear."
"B-bu-bu-but A-A-Anko, m-my se-sensei is K-K-Ku-Kurenai-sensei!" Hinata choked.
"I know, I know. Believe me Hinata-chan, I'm extremely jealous." Anko wasn't kidding. "But there are no exceptions regarding your sensei's gender."
"This is ridiculous! What is wrong with you? None of us are going to go through with it!" Ino protested.
"The task is a lot simpler than what you're making out of it, if you actually think. This is simply a test. But if you jonin don't want to do this then I'm sure the ANBU behind you will gladly take your place." The girls spun around to see that the ANBU made no indication of objecting.
"You're insane!" TenTen yelled.
"Oh suck it up!" Shizune suddenly spat. "You're not the only ones who had to do this! So get over it!"
That's right! Sakura remembered how flustered Shizune had been after earning acceptance into the group. She never asked her why she was so upset. But now it was crystal clear.
"You-you mean you actually had sex with Genma?" Sakura asked in surprise.
Shizune simply looked away.
"Quit making such a big deal out of this. I knew I shouldn't have invited you brats.'" Anko pinched the bridge of her nose.
Sakura was at a loss for words. She immediately thought of Kakashi upon hearing the requirements, but she couldn't fathom the idea of having sex with him. In truth, Sakura didn't know how to feel at the moment. She knew the prospect was supposed to sicken her, but she didn't feel anything. She decided that the shock numbed her senses.
"You have until the end of this month to get one article of underwear to me. I'll be asking your previous sensei if it's theirs, just to make sure. You're dismissed!"
"Wait, what if we all complete the task, wouldn't there be too many of us to accept?" Sakura reasoned weakly.
"I wouldn't worry about that, Haruno. If it comes down to it then the jonin have first dibs. This club was originally designed for female jonin, so, my apologies ANBU, but you'll just have to pray that the girls chicken out of intercourse." Anko snickered.
The ANBU women still didn't object to such an outrageous expectation. Sluts.
"That's all. You can go away now." Anko said.
"There is no way we're going to do this!" TenTen said as the four girls desperately held onto each other whilst stepping out of the room. "This is just… immoral!"
Sakura noticed that Ino seemed a bit bothered at first, but quickly changed her attitude and smugly exclaimed: "I don't know about you girls, but I'm doing it! I've had a throbbing desire to fuck Asuma-sensei senseless since I first grew these tits anyway!"
"Ino-chan!" Hinata gasped in surprise in an attempt to hush her blonde companion. Her face was so red it seemed to be on the brink of exploding.
"You girls are cowards." Ino spat competitively.
"Are you kidding me Ino?" TenTen was riled. "Even if I did decide to do this, I'm not as lucky as you to have someone hot like Asuma-sensei! I'm stuck with Gai! GAI!" TenTen cringed as she said his name with more emphasis.
"Well too bad, Ten. This is survival of the fittest. I can see why Anko would want to put us through this. As newly ripened women, it is our duty to prove our worth by having blistering, immoral sex with men that we shouldn't be having it with! It's the way of the ninja."
"You're sick, Ino-pig. Definitely a straight up, S-Class pervert." Sakura finally spoke in the lowest of voices.
"Heh, it figures that billboard brow wouldn't do this. That's why I'll always be a step ahead of you." Ino said with increasing enthusiasm. "So I guess I'm the only one daring enough to scratch my name on Konoha's list of amazing kunoichi. That's such a shame, since all of you have so much to live up to."
Sakura was infuriated. Hinata was embarrassed. At this point, TenTen changed her mind.
"No," TenTen said, "you're right. I'm doing this, too. Its bad enough Neji and Lee think so little of me. I have to do this."
"B-bu-but Te-Ten-Ten, you're g-going to have s-s-sex with Gai-sensei!" Hinata stammered.
"So what? At least I don't have it as bad as you do Hinata-chan." TenTen said dreadfully.
Hinata was going to cry.
"Fine! I'm doing this, too!" Sakura roared.
"Hah, don't act like you're angry about it, forehead. I know deep down you're dying to have sex with Kakashi-sensei." Sakura glared at Ino, who looked as if she knew Sakura like the back of her hand. Arrogant bitch. "Even I have to admit, I'm pretty curious." Ino continued.
"Well I'm not!" Sakura spat furiously. "Just because I have morals to feel bad about doing this doesn't mean you have to drag me down to your level. At least I'm not getting a kick out of this!"
"Yeah, yeah whatever. Say that to me again after you've gotten some from Kakashi." Ino replied easily.
"Good, so that means we're all in this together. This is our pact as Konoha's future elite kunoichi!" TenTen exclaimed with a stone hard face.
"No, not all of us. Hinata's not going through with it." Ino said in mock-pity. "That sucks, too. I'm sure Naruto would've loved to see your name on Konoha's list of all time elite shinobi. Not to mention your dad would be so proud of you. Looks like Hanabi will beat you at this game, too."
Hinata didn't make a sound. And even if she did, the other girls didn't hear her. But after a short moment, Hinata nodded her head slowly. Ino apparently provoked the girl enough for her to agree. Poor Hinata, Sakura thought. Having to attempt sexual intercourse with a female superior was just plain cruel. She had it the roughest.
"Alright, it's settled then." TenTen declared. "Although I still can't believe we're doing this …"
Drowning out their voices, Sakura slipped into her private reveries.
Sakura didn't know what the girls' relationships with their sensei were like, but it clearly couldn't be too different from her own bond with Kakashi. The girl had known the copy ninja for a year shy of a decade, and she found herself sharing the same sense of curiosity that Ino experienced.
Every fiber of her brain resented the idea of pursuing this task. Sakura's Super-Ego would much rather settle with jonin status and earn her name on that plaque some other way. But what must've been her Id urged her to follow through. Granted, the thought of making love to her former sensei never crossed her mind before. But now that it did, the carnal desire to have sex with Kakashi blossomed. And it intensified with every passing minute. For a moment, the temptation to rip off Kakashi's mask and graze her hands over his chiseled body pervaded her entirely. It was sick, and twisted, and downright immoral—and these thoughts that normally wouldn't enter her mind only exacerbated as she deliberated further. But her hormones made a play on her reasoning, convincing her that there was nothing wrong with fucking an older man now that she was finally a woman.
As she found herself warming to the challenge more and more (though she'd never admit it), Sakura stumbled over a complication.
"So, how are we going to do this anyway?" Sakura asked. It was the question they all found themselves asking.
TBC
End Note: I'm looking out for a beta reader. Please contact me if you can help me out!