'you found me hanging by my fingertips from your window and i don't want to tell you i was trying to rob you but idk how else to explain this and i don't want to go to jail and also you're kind of cute we should make out when i'm not clinging onto your window ledge for my life' au

It started with a bang, a yelp and an adorable squeak, but Clarke would never let Lexa say that to anyone.

Thin blankets covered knees as Lexa propped herself up in bed, reveling in the opportunity to watch movies without the need for headphones and letting her shoulders relax back into her pillows. Anya, Octavia and the rest of her sisters were out at a party for the football team, which Lincoln had decided they needed, but she'd faked a migraine herself, claiming she'd hosted enough parties for their house. She continued that even if Bellamy's fraternity did miss her, which she was sure they'd be too drunk to comprehend it, it was only for one night. And her pitying statement was actually half-true; people had been carefully avoiding striking up a conversation with her after Costia had broken up with her quite publicly, and Lexa didn't need another pitying stare or awkward silence as they figured out what not to say to the volatile brunette.

Besides Lexa was an amazing leader, "Commander" she'd been called more than once, and she deserved one night to herself; complete with horrendous movies, snacks and a nice bottle of wine.

Water, if her mother asked.

A bang outside made Lexa look her, her green eyes highlighted by the blue hue of her laptop and she quirked an eyebrow as she muted the sound swiftly. Moments passed as she waited for more noises, another clue that she'd heard something, but as the minute hand moved once more she decided it was probably nothing more than idiot boys playing drums on the trashcans outside as they passed by the house. While being in a sorority hadn't been in her own life plans-she was a legacy and it made her transcript look better-she had to admit she enjoyed living far enough away from any parties that she wasn't kept awake, but close enough that she could walk home when the tequila began to strike hard.

Pressing the volume button once more Lexa let Emma Stone take her attention once more, the glass of wine in her hand and perched at her lower lip. With her assignments done, events planned for her sisters and her weekly Skype call to her mother completed-maybe she called her mom as early as possible to get it out of the way-Lexa needed this relaxation, this time to herself.

And, sure, maybe it was an excuse to avoid Costia but who could blame her? The girl had broken up with her in front of everyone; her sisters, the football team, a group of nerds that Lexa had assumed lost their way to a tournament and ended up at a party. But those nerds had managed to record Lexa being told she was 'aloof', 'guarded', 'cold-hearted', and they'd put it on Facebook before Costia had even walked away. Confidence may have been given to Lexa at birth before patience or subtlety but that didn't mean she hadn't been shaken by the break-up, or the abrupt way Costia had gone about it.

A sigh escaped her lips before there was another noise, quieter this time like a shuffle or the dragging of jeans against a rough surface, and Lexa felt her heart pound as she realised that for her to hear a quiet noise so clearly, so obviously, it had to have come from outside her room. She paused her laptop again, telling herself it was probably Finn or Lincoln or Jasper following through with a dare to impress Bellamy, and she sat up straighter as she stared hard at her window. Blinking made too much noise, she figured, and she focused on her window, gasping at the sound of a muttered curse, followed quickly by a loud bang, a painful yelp all of which were topped off by a pitiful squeak of defeat.

Jumping out of bed Lexa grabbed the only thing close to her, a softball bat that Octavia had left in her room earlier that day, and she made her way to the window.

"Look, if you'd just let me explain -"

"I'm honestly sure that whatever excuse you come up with is going to be ridiculous considering your position. It's doubtful I'll even believe it anyway so if I were you, and I'm grateful that I'm not, I'd save my words for when the police get here."

Leaning against her Juliet balcony, with a hint of an amused smirk, Lexa stared at the blonde clinging on desperately. Her toes were propped against the small tiled roof that she'd clearly climbed onto but her fingers gripped onto the metal railings that protected Lexa from falling, a sight that had both angered and delighted the girl as she'd swung open her doors with bat in hand. The blondes body was stretched out across an easy five foot of space, her leather jacket hanging loosely from her body and her face red from exertion and embarrassment.

"God you're so," the girl trailed off, though her brows remained furrowed, and she strained to look up at Lexa as she continued to stare down at her while offering no help at all. "Can you please just help me? I'm pretty sure my body isn't supposed to be stretched out this far. Even Yoga has it's limits."

There was a scoff before, "I'm not helping you break into my house." Lexa watched as fingers struggled to tighten around the thin bars of her balcony and she glanced across, watching as calf muscles strained to keep the girls body weight comfortable. "Why don't you ask your friend to come back and help you?"

"Raven?" She croaked, the pressure on her chest making it difficult to multitask both breathing and speaking. "You saw her when you came out like Xena Warrior Princess, she bolted into the night. I'm not sure I'll ever see her again."

Lexa chuckled at that, remembered the terrified clatter as she'd opened her window before she heard a high-pitched "Yeah, bye Clarke!" She'd looked over in time to see a figure heading in the opposite direction, ignoring the snap of her name as the blonde-Clarke-resigned herself to being caught. Her phone in her hand, 911 highlighted on the screen, Lexa turned her attention back to the girl who was making obscene noises as her muscles began to protest their position.

"Are you some kind of serial killer?"

"What?"

"Answer the question."

"If I was a serial killer, would I admit to it?"

Lexa pondered that for a moment, her phone pressing against her chin and lower lip, before she shrugged out, "No, probably not."

There was a pause, an annoyed snort, before a soft "Why?" followed.

"I was just wondering what you'd do to me if I helped you up, but if you're just going to kill me then -"

"Do I look like I have any criminal knowledge whatsoever? I'm hanging from a balcony in the middle of the night because my friends dared me to. I'm not exactly Ted freaking Bundy."

"Nice reference, creep."

The girl, Clarke, huffed out another breath before she snapped her head back and looked up at the girl on the balcony. Without use of her hands to move it, blonde hair fell in front of her eyes and Lexa bit her lip to hide the snort of laughter that was bubbling up in her throat. The girl in front of her was definitely more on the pathetic side of the perp spectrum and Lexa took pity, placing her phone inside quickly rather than connecting the call to the police.

"Alright, listen," Lexa called out, her eyes surveying the situation. Physics class helped her slightly as she pictured momentum and force, before ignoring all thoughts of momentum and force in other areas, and she rolled her eyes. "You're going to have to let your feet drop, do it quickly, and swing forward; use that leverage to push yourself up onto the next railing and I'll be able to help pull you up from there until you can put your feet on the bar below the ledge."

Clarke gawped at her for a moment before she let out a loud laugh, shaking her head. "You don't look strong enough to pull a plug out of a sink. What if you drop me?"

"Then you get Chlamydia and die," Lexa deadpanned, pouting slightly at the offensive dig. "I'm stronger than I look but if you're going to be a total ass about it then I can leave you here to freeze all night or drop to the ground yourself."

For a long, silent, irritating moment the girl seemed to debate her options; going as far as to look around like she was surveying her surroundings and Lexa felt her patience waning far quicker than usual. She was about to give up before she heard a soft, "Alright, alright. I'll trust you."

"Yeah, like I'm the untrustworthy one in this situation," the brunette snapped, moving to the edge of the balcony as she prepared to reach out and grab Clarke's hand once it got closer to her. Her eyes checked the street below, noticing that it was thankfully empty, and she wondered what a sight they probably made. A half dressed sorority sister helping a leather clad asshole break into her bedroom.

Groundbreaking.

With a groan that caught Lexa off guard, because that was kind of hot, Clarke propelled herself off of where she was standing and she swung forward before using the weight of her own body to push herself up enough to grab a decorative piece of the railing closer to the girl above. It wasn't much but Lexa was able to use the closer distance to lean over, her hand wrapping around the girls forearm to help hoist her further. Clarke helped, scuffing her sneakers on the side of the wall until she could find a better grip and, together, they managed to drag Clarke enough that she was finally standing on the outside of Lexa's Juliet balcony, panting and exhausted and slightly scared the girl would push her backwards.

"So can I explain?"

Considering how much people assumed of her, and given the nicknames she held proudly, Lexa was actually nice. She just wanted to point that out.

"So let me get this straight," Lexa mused, her fingers curling around the warm mug of cocoa in her hands and she looked at the girl in front of her as she subconsciously mimicked the brunettes actions. "Your friend Raven, the one who ran away, had her panties stolen by my friend Octavia over some stupid dare at a party her brother Bellamy hosted, and Raven made it your mission to get them back after she forced her boyfriend Finn host a party so she knew my house would be empty?"

A quick nod, a bright,"Yep!" gave her an answer and Lexa rolled her eyes so perfectly that Clarke was stunned for a second.

"Our friends are idiots. But you're probably the biggest one of all."

Perfectly, wonderfully, nice.

"So, thanks for this," Clarke mumbled softly, shifting her feet on the wooden deck that surrounded the large house. Lexa leaned herself on the door, burying herself further into the hoodie she had put on as the night grew on and the air became colder. She wasn't expecting her roommates back until at least the first signs of daybreak and she argued with herself about letting the blonde stay a little longer, the company more enjoyable than she'd been anticipating when she'd clenched the softball bat in her hands hours earlier. "Raven was running low. It was a life or death situation for her hygiene and freshness."

"I really didn't need to know that," Lexa said above Clarke's laugh. It was a sound that brought a smile to Lexa's face, a sound she wanted to repeat over and over until she could replicate it in her dreams. Husky and soft and wait - "But the next time you try and break into my house I'm going to let you drop."

Clarke held her hands up in surrender, a clear bag holding her friends panties making the situation even more ridiculous, and she quickly dropped them to cross her heart. "I promise, no more late night underwear raids for me," she swore, a flicker in her eyes that told Lexa her sentence wasn't complete. "Unless you asked me personally, of course."

"Of course," Lexa muttered, a fond smile breaking her facade and she looked over Clarke's shoulder as an approaching car caught her attention. "I think Raven is trying to be your getaway driver."

Turning slowly, though only letting her eyes leave Lexa's at the last possible moment, Clarke watched as Raven attempted to drive subtle past the sorority house; her focus a little too much on the road in front as the car crawled painfully slowly past them. "God, should she even be driving?"

Lexa observed the car in amusement, "I don't think you can count that as driving. My grandmother can jog faster than that and she's been in a wheelchair for years."

"That was dark."

"Thanks, Ted."

Clarke let out a small noise before she stepped back, biting at her lower lip as she seemed to contemplate something, before she turned her attention completely on Lexa once more. "So we should do this again," she tried, shrugging like she didn't care and hoping Lexa couldn't see her hard pulse fluttering in her neck. "You know, minus the panties."

"If that's your attempt at flirting I think I'm going to have to say yes out of pity."

"So is that a yes?"

The brunette rolled her eyes again and Clarke felt the heat in her stomach return, only being sated when she heard the car roll past once more and a furious whisper that sounded a lot like Raven telling her to hurry up or she'll get caught. For a moment Lexa fiddled in her pockets before she pulled out a pen, items like that stashed everywhere when she studied, and she pulled Clarke's hand forward to scribble down her number. Costia be damned, Lexa thought, there were worse things she could do. "Every good criminal needs an accomplice," she told the blonde. "Let me know your next diabolical scheme and I'll see when I'm free."

[Unknown; 09:27am]: When I said "minus the panties" I wasn't flirting, just so you know. I was being serious.

[Lexa; 09:35am]: That's disappointing because I wasn't wearing any for our entire conversation. I'll change that next time we meet.

[Clarke; 09:37am]: Let's not be hasty. The most successful evil schemes are planned out in advance. With detailed summaries.

It started with a bang, a yelp and an adorable squeak, but Clarke would never let Lexa say that to anyone. Even if their love story was that of an evil genius.

AUTHORS NOTE: So my friend asked me to write her a prompt for her favourite couple, Clexa, and I thought I'd share it with you here too. There may be a series of these one-shots, slowly updating, but for now I hope you enjoy this. Let me know what you thought!