This story takes place in a slightly alternate universe where the wolves don't run out of time as humans. Every winter they change into wolves, and every summer they change back into humans. It is time for Sam to leave for the winter. Here is their goodbye.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Wolves of Mercy Falls trilogy or any of the characters. Everything belongs to Maggie Stiefvater. Thanks for reading!
I held her in my arms, dreading winter while holding my summer girl. I stood by the front door of Grace's house, warm in her embrace despite the -15 degree weather. We didn't speak, we simply stood. I felt her arms around my waist getting tighter and tighter like with each passing second she became more and more convinced that the harder she held on, the longer I would stay.
19 years old. I am 19 years old and she is 18 and we are barely adults yet I've loved this girl for 7 years and I love her more every single day. She holds me tight / In her embrace I am free / We silently stop time / My summer girl and me. The lyrics come, but I push them away. I don't need lyrics right now. I need her.
Her face in buried in my neck, breathing steadily. I feel warm water slide down my skin and realize she's crying. I place my hand on the back of her head, holding her to me. "Hey," I whisper, "don't cry, Angel."
Grace's breathing is faster now, more uneven. Her body shakes, pressed against mine. "I need you." She whispers. "I need you here with me." Tears threaten to spill from my eyes and I won't cry I won't cry I won't cry but there are too many of them for my yellow eyes to hold so they fall fall fall.
I gently pull her head up so I can see her face, but she turns away from me, slipping out of my grasp. "Grace." She shakes her head. I know she doesn't want me to see her cry. I know she's embarrassed. Looking at my watch, I see the time reads 3:15. I told Beck I'd meet him in the woods behind her house at 3:30 so we could change together. "Grace, please." She turns around, looks down, I step forward. I hold her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. My eyes search hers. "God, you're so beautiful."
Her face crumples and she falls into my arms, burying her face in my chest. One word. "Stay." Oh, god.
"You know I want to, baby." She looks up at me. "But you know I have to go."
She shakes her head. "I thought I was going to be brave. I told myself I'd be brave. Sam…" The way she says my name breaks my heart into a million pieces. "I can't do this alone. I can't…I can't be without you." I wipe away one of her tears and take her hand. I pull out my phone, send a text. I need more time. I'll be there at 5. I set my phone alarm for 4:45.
And then I kiss her. Hard. She kisses back, tightening her grip on my waist while I hold her face to mine. I pull away and take her hand. "Come here," I say, leading her back into her room. When we're inside, she closes the door, leaning against it. My mind flashes back to the night after the candy shop, but I want to be here and now.
Her hands are behind her back, so I brace myself on either side of her head and lean in, close to her ear. "You will never, ever be alone." I kiss her neck, but she pulls me by my hair until my lips meet hers.
When I pull away to look at her, her eyes are pleading. "Don't." She whispers. "Please, Sam, don't stop." So I kiss her again and I lift her with my hands under her thighs and she wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I sit down on the bed so Grace is straddling me and she pulls away so I can catch my breath and she presses her lips to my neck. Thin hands run down my arms, my chest, my back.
I didn't bother to put on a jacket, knowing I no longer had to hide from the cold, but Grace wore a sweatshirt, a shirt and an undershirt, all of which had somehow managed to end up on the floor. She pulled my shirt off and I unhooked her bra and I laid back and she pressed her body to mine, lips moving up down my chest. I closed my eyes as she reached the waistline of my pants and suddenly we were just skin and bones and our clothing was in forgotten piles on the floor.
After climbing under the covers, I rolled us over so I was on top of her and I slid down to kiss her belly all the way back to her lips and I traced the outline of her body with my fingertips, trying to memorize every curve. She groaned when I gently bit her neck and it was too much, too much so I kissed her and she bit my lip and I growled and she grabbed my hand and held it while the other cupped her face and I stopped and looked at her.
I looked at her looking at me. I saw hungry eyes, swollen lips, pink cheeks, a girl far too beautiful to be lying naked beneath me, clinging to me, reaching for me. I saw it all and underneath it I saw the smart and the brave and the strong and the sarcastic and the know-it-all and the girl who never, ever, gave up, a girl far too good to be saying these things to me, calling for me, begging for me.
"I love you so much, Grace Brisbane." I shook my head sadly. "Too much for my own good."
The truth was, I didn't want her to say it back. I didn't want her to tell me she loved me. Words didn't mean as much to Grace as they did to me. I knew by the way she moved, the way she said my name, looked at me, that she felt it. And she felt it nearly enough to break my heart.
In woke up to my phone alarm, shivering and warm at the same time. I looked at Grace, her legs tangled in mine, curled up against me with her head on my chest. It wasn't surprising that she slept through the alarm. She was exhausted, both physically and mentally. I was too, but I was also on edge, anxious about the transformation in the near future.
Slowly, carefully, I pulled my body from hers, kissing her forehead after pulling the covers tight around her. "I love you. I'll see you soon." And with that, I was in my jeans and a light t-shirt, just enough to make sure I could get to the woods before I changed. I walked out the door and into the hallway. Alone, and the crushing weight of the loneliness was almost enough to nock me off my feet. But I kept moving, because I had to. Sliding open the back door, feeling the animal inside trying to tear its way out, I made my way to Beck, standing at the edge of the woods.
Thanks for reading, I really hope you liked it! Your reviews mean so so much to me. I think I'm going to keep this as a one-shot, but who knows, if I get enough reviews, maybe I'll keep going :)
~Itsafangirlworld
